Apologies for not posting sooner- I've been battling a little bit of writer's block the last little while. Luckily, it seems that with the right music, anything is possible.
Warning: Character Death, Angst, Darker Themes.
Disclaimer: Yeah. I don't own the Avengers.
-;-
Bruce Banner was a patient man. Well, actually, he liked to think of himself as a patient. In reality, however, the scientist was about as far from patient as Tony Stark was from sober- very.
And if this completely outrageous behavior was going to continue in the tower, there were going to be several problems that would be arising very quickly in the near future- one of them being the Other Guy. And Bruce was fairly certain that no one was going to be doing too well if that happened.
He could understand that tension was high- it was to be expected, really, given the circumstances. But if he was going to be the one responsible for reigning in a bunch of superheroes, he was not going to last long. Especially not after this blow.
Bruce understood Natasha's pain, having experienced so frequently in his life, but even this was a hard pill to swallow. No one had thought that Clint wouldn't be coming back from this mission- no one had been able to anticipate the aftermath that would blow over all of them.
Even as Steve and Tony battled it out, all he could do was simply sigh and rub his forehead. He was tired. So very, very tired. And he wasn't cut out for this kind of life, even if it had been forced upon him. He couldn't handle the people that he'd begun opening up to slowly disappearing one by one. He emotionally could not handle it.
"Bruce?"
The scientist glanced up, broken from his thoughts, to see Steve's worried face closer than was probably appropriate.
"Yeah? Sorry, just…thinking." He replied tiredly, pulling out a stool and taking a seat. "Steve, as much as I hate to admit it, Tony does have a point. Are you coping?"
"What?" the blond jerked back, surprise etched into his face.
"I know you want to check on Natasha. We all are worried about her. But I think, given the circumstances, that we need to let her have a couple of days to herself before we try to approach her. She was closer to Clint than she was to anyone else- it's going to take longer for her to move on in her grieving process." Bruce said quietly, not turning to meet the super-soldier's gaze. He already knew that he would find betrayal there, despite his opinion already being made clear.
"I'm afraid I can't do that, Doctor Banner-"
"Oh for Christ's sake, Steve!" Bruce yelled, turning in his chair to face the blond. "Are we really going to start all over again because I'm trying to keep everyone in this place as safe as possible? We're all grown adults, damnit, and it's about time we start acting like it!"
Steve looked startled- half, anyway. The other half was wariness- no doubt worried about the Hulk making an appearance- but Bruce didn't care. The only thing on his mind was how upset he was. He may not have known Clint as well as Natasha, but he would like to think that they at least had a loose, easy manner around one another.
There were several times recently that the archer had taken to trying to wake up before the reclusive scientist, perching in various places around the kitchen in an attempt to startle or scare Bruce, and they could keep up an easy banter while Bruce made meals. On occasion, Clint would even help- turned out he was pretty good around a kitchen himself, even if he wouldn't admit it to the rest of the group. Not including Natasha, of course. Those two knew each other more intimately than anyone else ever would.
And now, Clint was gone and Natasha appeared to be spiralling into a deep, dark pit that Bruce was silently wondering she would ever manage to get out of.
"Yeah."
"Yeah?" Bruce snorted.
Steve looked momentarily somber, and for a moment, Bruce could see the remorse and grief that the man was going through himself.
"I'm coping. For now." The blond admitted quietly before meeting Bruce's eyes. "I'm sorry, Bruce. I shouldn't have-"
"Don't. We're all feeling high strung, Steve." The brunette replied softly. "I'm sorry as well. I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you. It's no one's fault that this happened."
"I'm just worried about her. I mean, she's always had Barton as a partner. And now she's isolated down in the training rooms and we're just going to let her stay there?"
"Everyone has their own way of dealing with grief, Steve." Bruce pointed out. "When she's ready, she'll come to us. After all, there's nothing that can change the Black Widow's mind once it's set."
That managed to draw a short bark of laughter out of Steve, but even as quickly as it came, it disappeared, leaving the two men sitting on the bar stools and thinking about how everything could very quickly change before they knew it.
-;-
A day and a half.
So easily, things could get this fucked up without anyone even trying.
"Sir, are you positive you're alright?" Jarvis inquired over the speaker system as Tony tore through another red light. "Your total of charges has already been calculated as one thousand thirty-nine dollars, and I am almost certain that Director Fury will wish to speak with you at some point of your reckless behavior."
"I'm sure he will." Tony snorted, rolling his eyes. "Until that point, I'm focusing on getting as far out of town as I possibly can before screaming into the wilderness that life isn't fair."
"Am I correct in assuming that you are referring to Agent Barton, Sir?" The AI asked carefully.
"Yep."
"My apologies, Sir. I will continue charting a less populated route."
Silence fell in the vehicle, and it was only several minutes until Tony sighed heavily and pulled over to the side of a less busy street, leaning forward to rest his forehead against the steering wheel and focus on breathing deeply. There were emotions swarming around him- emotions that he hadn't felt in so long that it was almost new to him.
His heart felt heavy. Almost so much so that it was almost a physical weight tugging him towards the earth, and his eyes prickled with wetness.
Tony Stark cried.
It wasn't something that he thought he was capable of- not since the arc reactor and the beginning of all of this shit and becoming some kind of glorified superhero. But somehow, the loudmouthed archer/assassin had managed to worm his way into Tony's small little group of people that he would trust with his life if need be, and now that connection was gone.
He cried until he was sure that his eyes were red and swollen, and it wasn't until he croaked out Jarvis' name that the silence was broken.
"I darkened your windows as soon as you pulled the vehicle over, Sir." The AI replied, sounded very much muted in comparison to his usual tone. "Would you allow me to drive the distance back to the tower?"
"Thank you, Jarvis." Tony snorted, wiping at his eyes before reclining into his seat. "Take the wheel."
"Of course, Sir."
-;-
She was exhausted. There was almost no energy remaining in her body to be angry anymore. All of her anger had been taken out on the room around her- the remnants of some kind of war that she wanted nothing more than to forget.
Now there was simply a deep sinking feeling- a sense of regret, if anything, setting into her bones, and she wanted nothing more than to crawl into her bed and never come back out again.
But there was nowhere for her now. No one to share the space with, nowhere for her to sleep. She was almost entirely a stranger in Stark's home, despite being put onto the Avengers team.
"Jarvis?" she asked, flinching at how broken her voice sounded.
"Yes, Agent Romanoff?" the AI replied immediately, tone gentle.
"Could you direct me to a room upstairs, if possible?"
"Of course. Sir had a floor renovated for you to stay as soon as you were added to the Avengers. Shall I direct you to it?" Jarvis replied.
"If it's not too much trouble." She said hoarsely.
"Of course not. If you'll make your way to the lift, I shall take you to it immediately."
"Thank you."
Pulling herself to her feet, the assassin wavered on her feet- no doubt thanks to the shallow wounds on her hands and wrists, before making her way over to the door and pulling it open, allowing herself to shiver as the cooler air from the hall snaked past her.
She knew where the elevator was, thankfully, and she made it there with no incident. Apparently Captain America had decided that it was wise to avoid the Black Widow when she was so tightly wound. As she thought of it, Natasha sighed regretfully. She hadn't exactly been in her right mind not all that long ago. She owed Steve an apology for her blatant attack on him. But until she felt she had one hundred percent control over herself and her emotions, it would be the most logical choice to simply avoid everyone else as much as possible.
"Miss Romanoff, your floor." Jarvis said smoothly, effectively breaking the redhead from her thoughts as the doors slid open to reveal a rather large expanse of floor, the furniture scattered around marking it as a living space.
Natasha hesitantly stepped into the apartment, silently marveling at the care and craftsmanship that she could see in everything around her.
"Is all of this for me?" she asked.
"Yes. Also, you are the only person authorized on this floor, unless you wish to change your settings. It is the same for all of the other living spaces in the tower, and currently you have no restrictions, other than Sir's personal lab in the Research and Development area. And only because Sir is protective of his projects. Otherwise, you are permitted to go anywhere you wish."
"This is too much space." She protested quickly.
"Miss Romanoff, this is your floor. Sir has installed your own personal weight room, weapons storage room, full library and study, as well as a master bath, master bedroom and fully stocked kitchen, as seen to your left." Jarvis stated with the faintest traces of amusement. "I believe that you will find that this is the correct amount of space."
For an instant, Natasha was touched by the effort Stark had put into this place for her. All of this was for her.
"Can you thank Stark for me?" she asked, finding a lump suddenly in her throat.
"Of course. Enjoy your afternoon, Miss Romanoff." Jarvis stated before falling silent.
Natasha sighed, already finding herself relaxing at the dark blue walls and white accents, before padding through the doorway of the living room and kitchen space to head down the hall to where she assumed the bedroom was.
Luckily, her assumption was correct, and before she could take in the rest of the room, she was crawling into the large bed and immediately falling asleep, drained and not willing to let her mind mull over everything that was wrong with her life.