In the night-black depths of the British Museum station, Ofjan and Heron dug up the rubble under the graffiti and found their efforts rewarded by finding absolutely nothing. "We could take the rubble or these spare rail parts," Heron mused.

"Let's go," Ofjan said. "You may be fine in jeans but I hate these shorts."

"Are you still going by the modesty dictates of your oppressors?"

"No, I feel cold whenever a train goes past."

"AAAAAHHHHHHHAAAHHHH!"

"Now what?" Heron asked as she took out her power sword.

A shimmering human wearing a blue & gold headdress that wouldn't look out of place on a Rubric Marine stumbled towards the Commissar & Priest with outstretched arms.

"AAAAHHHHAAAHHH!"

"Piss off," Ofjan said. She held forth her chainsword and swiped. The ghost vanished immediately.

"Anyway, Ofjan, what shall we do now? Shall we visit the British Museum itself?"

"No, I want to see the trees. I never imagined Terra with trees."

And so they were in the garden that was Russell Square. Surely nothing could go wrong here?

It didn't, but Heron & Ofjan then took a walk futher north...

"Heron, is that Flight Lieutenant Reid? Why's she here?"

In full Avrolanc Blitzkrieg Feudal uniform, Reid was an unusual figure in a place full of half-naked people. Noblewomen of Avrolanc IIIa always wore blue gowns and elaborate veils. With her were several Avrolanc soldiers in full flak armour and Palatine Decilu in the red power armour & white helmet of the Order of the BloodyRose. What was happening? Why were they congregating outside Waitrose?

In fact, several individuals from the building opposite came out before Ofjan & Heron reached the Guard. "Excuse me, you can't film here," said one. He was wearing a white shirt and black trousers. Another was wearing... was wearing a uniform almost identical to the Avrolanc Blitzkrieg.

"We weren't filming," Reid said. "Were we filming?"

"Are you with these people?" the white-shirt man asked Decilu.

"Blessed day," she replied.

"Are you involved with this?"

"We've been sent good weather."

"Reid!" Heron shouted. "What did I tell you about not filming military property?"

"Are you with these people?" asked the Avrolanc lookalike.

"Sadly. Reid, Coxan, Kalos, were any of you filming that place?"

"No, sir," said all of them.

"Why do we let you do the shopping? Ofjan?"

"Coxan was filming. All of you, return to the billet." Ofjan turned to white-shirt man and the Avrolanc lookalike. "I apologise for the behaviour of these scum, Petty Officer and Corporal. I will flog them later."

"Just don't film here, any of you weirdos."

Once away from Russell Square, the Commissar and the Priest took the offenders into the nearby hotel where the Order of the Sacred Grove was billeted. Meanwhile, Decilu headed off to Russell Square station to take the Tube back to Waterloo and then get the train to Kingston. Once the Guard was alone in one of the hotel suites, Ofjan & Heron could give them the normal treatment. "While we can't execute any of you because the hotel cleaners would be horrified," Ofjan began, "we can punish you in other ways. Reid, you are sentenced to 5 days confined to billet with only BBC Radio 2 to listen to."

The noblewoman's expression said it all.

Heron added, "Coxan and Kalos, I'd have thought better of you two. After a bad start, you were quite promising. Therefore, and we've arranged for this the moment we got here, you two will each spend half a day on Regent Street with a sign reading 'GOLF SALE'."

They too were horrified.

"Now get back to our hotel. Move!"

"Tell the Grey Knights that Waterstones, Foyles, Games Workshop, and WHSmith have not stolen their secrets, they just had a lucky guess," Dominic sighed as he adjusted the hood of his robes. "Can't anyone grasp that Earth is Terra?"

"Some can," said Captain Jho of the Star Rajas. The huge blue Terminator suit stomped around the restaurant of their hotel, which had a good view of the Thames and a bizarre white dome with orange pylons sticking out. A few of the other clientele grumbled but didn't complain.

Studying the stories in last night's Evening Standard and that day's Times, Guardian, and Daily Mail, the Inquisitor had to control his rage at how Brother Ling of the Star Rajas had attracted the attention of two police forces, everyone in the City of London with a smartphone, all of Twitter, and the newspapers. However, the recording scrambler had prevented any proper photos of either the Ling or the Khorne Berzerker, who probably had a similar device. "Twitter, giving normal people access to so much power, how foolish.I guess this is inevitable. As I said when your brothers murdered those moped muggers, I will tolerate small breaches for the good of humanity."

"The crime rate here is lower than Necromunda, Inquisitor," Brother Ultran said as he entered the room.

"Since you're here, let me ask, what were you thinking, chatting to Lucius the Eternal about art?"

"I was, uh, trying to assess what he knew."

"Hmm... Bollocks. You were clearly a moronic, brain-dead oaf. How did you get into such as exclusive club?"

Before this got any worse, Jho asked, "Where are we going today?"

"I'm using the discount from the Visitor Oyster Card and try out the London Helicopter. I'm sorry to say that Space Marines are too big for the ride."

The Marines shrugged and said nothing more, so gave Jho the newspapers and left. While Space Marines may or may not have been too big, an average Sister of Battle was fine, so he planned for two members of the Order of the Sacred Grove to join him. It only cost him £2000 of other people's money. The other people in question were amongst those whose bank accounts were dormant for 15 years. Since the UK government was plundering the government, why shouldn't the armies of the righteious do the same? Of course, that still required getting to the heliport first. With the tour scheduled for 13:00, any sensible person starting out at 09:00 would take the Tube directly. Instead, Dominic chose an elaborate route across the Isle of Dogs, the City of London, and London Waterloo just so he could try out the Docklands Light Railway. There are always fussy people.

Once aboard the driverless train, Dominic saw that both front seats were taken. Pulling out his Inquisition Rosette, he said, "Step out of the seat."

The women in a pink hijab with green spots stared at him with raised eyebrows.

Realising that nobody had any respect for the Inquisition because the Inquisition didn't exist yet, Dominic sighed and sat further back.

While he waited for the train to start, he saw a blond woman reading the Metro smile at him. He smiled back but realised the woman had the golden Mark of Khorne tattooed on her neck and her right forearm. A quick scan showed she carried a chainaxe and a bolt pistol.

There was no doubt about it, she was a Pink Decimator Khorne Berzerker. Normally wearing perverted copies of Adepta Sororitas power armour, this cult was the fiercest non-Space Marine Chaos Renegade army around. The question is what she was doing on the train. The DLR went to Canary Wharf, the City, and to the castle nearby, the Tower. She could not be allowed near Tower Bridge or indeed any major tourist attraction, but what could Dominic do when on the train?

He saw another passenger down the carriage in a red robe. The cybernetic arms jutting from his back suggested he belonged to the Mechanicus, but none of their staff had been assigned to the Docklands area. No, the 8-point star exposed the Heretek for what he was- a heretical Heretek.

"The next station is Island Gardens. On leaving the train, please remember to take all your belongings with you."

A few people got on but none got off. The Berzerker continued reading the Metro, probably sampling the Rush Hour Crush, and the Dark Mechanicus filth stayed seated. Dominic saw the DLR staff member go down the carriage to take manual control while the train went under the Thames.

The Heretek pointed a steel finger at the front and the train started speeding up. Dominic saw the driver rush forward and unlock the forward panel, but nothing worked. No controls responded. It was obvious- the Black Legion had seized control of part of Transport for London. Granted, it was one train only but Dominic decided to stop the heretics from getting further ideas. "You, cyborg, stop hacking the train!"

"Well spotted, fleshy one," buzzed the creature. "Stop me."

"Are you hijacking us?" asked the driver. He, hijab-woman, and the family with toddlers were open-mouthed with horror.

"This train is now under the service of Abaddon," the Berzerker announced. "We are going to Bank."

"We were already going to Bank."

"Not this fast. Full speed!"

"Full speed, Kojun. Inquisitor, meet Kojun Neckslicer, my friend."

"I'm calling the police," said the DLR driver. "Bastards, you cut the phone signal!"

Dominic decided it was time to turn his limiter off. With a thought, the little ball in his back shut down and the whole train gasped as though everyone had farted at once and let off twelve stink bombs. That was because Dominic had allowed his blank qualities to come to the fore. As a blank, he wasn't a psyker, quite the opposite. He was immune to all but the most powerful psychic attacks and invisible to Lesser Daemons. However, around humans, he just made everyone a bit uneasy. Having thrown everyone off, he leapt off his seat and sliced the Heretek's hand off.

The cyborg grunted and raised an axe. He then dropped the axe when Dominic chopped his head off. The Inquisitor hadn't even drawn his sword yet.

"I have control again!" said the staff member. "You have some explaning to do, I-man."

"Let's sort this out now," Kojun screeched. She nearly decapitated the Inquisitor in one blow but Dominic managed to draw his power sword in time. The only thought in both combatants' heads was to kill the other.

"Can't destroy IS, can't kill backwards filth, can't kill anti-humans," Captain Jho grumbled to Brother Odoki of the Space Wolves. "Who can we kill?"

"Focus on earning a song about killing Plaguebearers on a Routemaster," the furry giant replied. "I've already done so, but how they got there is a mystery for the ages."

"How did you get on the bus?"

"I didn't." It was true- Space Marines simply could not fit onto any TfL vehicles and so had not been issued Oyster Cards. "I stopped the bus, knocked it over, and slaughtered the Neverborn. Great fortune, there were no passengers aboard!"

"What about the driver?"

"We're purifiying him now. He'll be back to serve London without any trace of Nurgle's plagues."

The two giants attracted a few stares at they walked through Knightsbridge but nobody made any comment. The Imperial task force had found that even the most extravagent costume was of no interest to a Londoner. Even the armed police outside the numerous embassies said nothing.

"Is that the Catachans?" the Star Raja asked. "What are they doing there, lah?"

"There's an argument, a dispute. They're outside a building called Harrods."

The Space Marines raced forward and covered 500 metres in 5 seconds. Several brute thugs wearing only trousers and vests were shouting at and threatening the smartly-dressed staff of the department store. "That's it, we are calling the police," said a bald civilian wearing a tie.

"THIS IS HOW YOU TREAT SOLDIERS?" a Catachan with Sergeant tatooes roared. His hand was reaching for his blade and it was at that point that the Space Marines had to intervene.

"Halt!" Odoki ordered as he jammed the phone signals. "Everybody stop! What is going on here? Why are you Guardsmen near this bazaar?"

"I asked for help," said a Sister of Battle in the green and brown power armour of the Order of the Sacred Grove. She had a red bandana wrapped around her head, just like the thugs with her. "The other Sororitas are investigating a local golf club and IKEA Croydon. Wow, trees on Terra."

"What is IKEA?" the Space Wolf demanded.

"A hardware store, massive. We had to send half our force as it's so huge."

Jho pushed several Catachans aside to reach the Harrods greeter. "Why are these soldiers refused entry?"

"They are violating the dress code. We forbid revealing clothing and tank tops."

Snorting, the Terminator Captain got just a bit closer. "Am I and the Space Wolf breaking your... dress code, lah?"

To his credit, the greeter did not flinch from the transhuman's gaze. "We ask that helmets be removed and backpacks either held in the hand or put in lockers. However, we permit helmets for religious reasons."

"I am not wearing a backpack."

"Sir, you have a large mass on your back."

"That is an atomic generator. Would you entrust something so dangerous to a mere locker that I could break into right now without breaking sweat?"

"I could break into those lockers," Sister Meldra said.

"Well, the police aren't coming," Odoki said, "but I agree with the Harrods staff. Catachans, I think you'd be better off in Oxford Street."

"May we come in?" Jho asked the doorman.

The human sighed. "At the risk of my job, you may come in."

"Sister Meldra, we're with you. We will- Chaos Squats!"

All eyes turned to the people who'd entered amidst the commotion. The Squats were a near-mythical abhuman race, with some disputing whether they ever existed at all. However, the Star Rajas knew that the small, hairy people did exist, and that the armoured creatures with beards coiled up were servants of a minor Chaos God, Hashut. Speculating that they may have just come from the Science Museum or perhaps the Victoria & Albert, Jho attacked.