Disclaimer: I own nothing, not Victorious or Sam & Cat. I write this purely because I can. And because of my guilt at not posting in a while.

"You know what my days used to be like? I just tested. Nobody murdered me. Or put me in a potato. Or fed me to birds. I had a pretty good life. And then, you showed up... you dangerous. Mute. Lunatic."

GLaDOS, Portal 2

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"What the fuck was- what?!" Robbie spun, looking around in bewilderment. "Wh-"

"NO!" Cat screamed, jumping at Robbie, covering his mouth and interwining her other hand in his mass of curly hair. Robbie bit his tongue, eyes widening as the smell of her strawberry and vanilla assaulted his nostrils and a tingling feeling popped up where she stroked his hair. He raised an eyebrow as she spoke up. "No more bad words, Robbie. It sounds worse coming out of your lips."

He looked away, not noticing the sultry look she wore as she gazed at his lips. Those soft, plump lips.

"Rob," Beck stepped forward. "Are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah, or at least I assume so," Robbie answered, breaking away from Cat nervously. She pouted a bit. Robbie turned his full attention to Beck, remembering what Travyl had told him. "What happened? How did I get out here? When did you guys get here?"

"Um, Rob," Andre said. "You were in there for about a half hour and we had to bust the door down to get you out. We didn't know what'd happened and you weren't answering our knocks."

Robbie was about to answer when-

SMACK!

"AHHHHHHH! What the f-" Robbie yelled, interrupted by Cat yet again, who had grabbed his face and was now trying to calm him down. Robbie looked to see that Jade had once again slapped him and was now being held back by Beck, Andre and Tori, the latter two holding her arms, Beck's arms wrapped around her waist. All this in less than ten seconds.

"Jade!" Everyone but said teen exclaimed loudly. Jade continued to kick and struggle, giving Robbie a venomous stare as she attempted to reach him, violent intentions clear.

"Baby, calm down, he just woke up, let him explain," Beck pleaded. Jade shook her head wildly in response.

"NO! HE KNOWS! THAT LITTLE FREAK! HE KNOWS HIM!" she screamed, causing Cat and Robbie to flinch. They hadn't heard her scream like that since some Northridge giril had drugged Beck and tried to sleep with him. "WHO THE FUCK IS HE, SHAPIRO?! TELL ME OR I'LL KILL YOU AND HIM!"

"Wait, wait, wait, hold up," Andre said, letting go of Jade and backing up. "If you kill him, won't it make finding this guy harder?"

Everyone paused at this, the other three freezing. Jade glared at Andre. "Really? You ask that now"

Robbie, who was hiding behind Cat, spoke up without thinking. "He's got a point. I don't even know what you're talking about. Are you having your period?"

He quickly shut his mouth. Jade turned back to him, lauching forward only to be stopped once again by Tori, Beck and Andre. "I'M GONNA KILL YOU REGARDLESS NOW!"

This went on for another ten minutes before Jade finally calmed, falling into Beck's arms where she gripped him tight, burying her head in his shoulder, Beck stroking her hair lightly as he told her he loved her. She just wanted to find the creep who had dared to touch her, and in front of Beck, no less.

Checking she wasn't about to maul his face off, Robbie stepped forward. "Uh, Jade? Beck?" the young couple looked up at him. "Who are you talking about? What little freak?"

There was no doubt in Robbie's mind regarding who they were talking about. It had to be Travyl, but they couldn't know that he already knew. He wasn't ready to face another enraged Jade West.

"Some... kid got into my RV while Jade and I were sleeping," Beck answered slowly. "Said he was watching us."

Robbie blinked. That sounded disturbing. Even by Travyl's standards. But Robbie wasn't susprised. From what he knew of the two, Dante, Cat's brother was strange, sure, but Travyl could make both Cat and her brother look like the picture's of sanity when he wanted.

"O... kay?" he tried to play it cool. He didn't need them getting suspicious about his relation to Travyl. "Uh, did you catch his name?"

"Yeah, said his name was Travyl Latore and that he knew you," Beck bit his lip, giving Robbie an elevator look. "And that we'd get hurt if we tried to help you."

Before Robbie could answer, Jade voiced her thoughts on the matter. "Then we should ditch him. I only ever tolerated him for Cat."

Both Cat and Robbie went a bit red at this. "Jadey!" Cat huffed. "Not now!"

"So, Rob?" Beck said. "How do you know this guy? You never mentioned being friends with a psycho."

"Of course I didn't," Robbie couldn't stop himself. "Jade doesn't think we're friends."

Beck's grip on Jade tightened, expecting her to leap at Robbie for the insult, but she merely shrugged. "He's right."

Beck shot a look at Robbie. "Not funny, Rob. Seriously. How do you know this guy?"

Robbie looked down, frowning. "He's... he's, uhhh..."

"Spit it out, Shapiro!" Jade spat.

"He's..." Robbie wore a pained look as he finished his sentence. "He's... my cousin."

-Defining Insanity-

Boom! Should I end it there?

No. Keep it coming.

Oh, fine.

-Defining Insanity-

"He's your what!?" Jade exclaimed. "Does being a freak run through your family as much as it does Cat's!?"

"Yeah, Rob, what the fuck? What's wrong with your family?" Beck was quick to agree with his girlfriend.

"GUYS!" Tori had sped inbetween the two and Robbie, a look of shock on her face. "Have you forgotten the reason we're all here in the first place?"

Beck and Jade gave her confused looks before Tori inched closer to the two and, so Robbie wouldn't hear, whispered, "His sister, you morons!"

The two backed up, looks of guilt quickly making their way onto their faces. They glanced over at Robbie. The air in the room suddenly became awkward. Beck had forgotten about Robbie's sister Rosy and even Jade felt bad about her words. They hadn't been too stingy but insulting his family probably wasn't a good thing for him, considering how quickly they had all died on him.

"Uh. Sorry, about that, Rob," Beck was the first to speak. "We didn't mean to-"

"It's cool, man, I get it. You too, Jade," Robbie replied, seeing Jade open her mouth. "No need to apologise. They're dead, and I'm not happy about it but..." he shrugged. "I'm not gonna break down in tears at the mention of them. They wouldn't like that."

"I can respect that," Beck nodded, looking at Jade. "Were you gonna apologise, Jade."

"She doesn't have to," Robbie stopped her before she could speak. "I doubt she wants to anyway."

Jade nodded in aggreement. "He's right. I don't want to."

More silence.

"So," Andre spoke up. "About your cousin-"

"Stop," Robbie held up a hand to silence him. "Just stop. Can we talk about it another time? I need to lie down. I think I'm getting a headache."

Everyone looked at each other before voicing their agreement. "We'll leave you alone," Tori said firmly as Andre. Beck and Jade left the room. "But we need to talk about things soon. Okay?" Robbie nodded, waving her off.

He lay on the right side of the bed as the door closed behind Tori, closing his eyes and folding his arms behind his head. His head suddenly pounded painfully.

He sat up quickly, clutching his head in his hands, wincing slightly. Opening his eyes, he noticed a blur of red velvet in the corner of his eyes. He spun where he sat to find the literal girl of his dreams, Caterina Valentine, lying down next to him, head raised with a look of worry on her beautiful face.

He let out a an annoyed sigh.

Oh, now this should be good. He heard Travyl's voice echo through his mind. I wonder how she's gonna screw you around now.

He ignored the comment, instead curious as to why Cat had stayed behind. And why Tori had let it slip by her.

"Cat, what are you doing here? I'm just gonna be resting for a while."

"I..." she hesitated, sitting up and crossing her legs, tugging insecurely at the hem of her sundress. "I felt bad for what happened. And you and I haven't really talked since our... date."

"Oh," Robbie went red. The date had gone well. They'd went out to a theme park, somehow ending up spending two hours at an arcade, playing a two-player platformer more frustrating than Flappy Bird due to how Cat killed Robbie, by accident, more times than the enemies or that demon bird ever could. They had almost kissed, when he walked her home, outside the door of her shared apartment, but he had backed off at the last second and, in response, she had rushed inside, slamming the door after a quick bye. He tried to forget the fact that it sounded like she had sobbed after the bye on the walk home.

They hadn't talked about the date, or had any proper conversation, since.

"So..." Cat trailed off. "I had fun."

"Cat, the date was like a month ago," Robbie deadpanned.

"I know, but-" Cat didn't get to finish.

"Can we talk about this later?" Robbie asked once again. "I really just wanna rest right now."

"I... but... okay," Cat's head drooped, but was lifted just as fast. "Can I... Can I stay with you? I feel kinda tired, too."

"Really?" Robbie gave her an incredulous look.

"Yeah! I mean," she faked a yawn as she spoke. "Yeah, very tired, I could fall asleep right n-"

She toppled where she sat, head falling into Robbie's lap, red velvet hair spilling around her head. She was snoring softly, but Robbie suspected from how fast she was snoring that she was faking it.

"Cat," he poked her cheek lightly. "I know you're awake."

She just muttered something about not getting a hint, grabbing Robbie's arm, sitting up and lying down again, pulling him down with her.

It took Robbie a moment to realise the love of his life had just implied that she wanted to sleep in his arms.

He slowly wrapped an arm around Cat's waist, unsure about how forward he should be about this.

When his arm was snugly secure around her, she made a small, excited squeak sound and buried her head in his chest, a small smile on her face.

Robbie raised an eyebrow. Thos was weird, surely, but instead of questioning it, he simply closed his eyes, enjoying the moment before reality could ruin things again.

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I will admit now that I should've seen some mushy moment coming, but I doubt this little thing with the red-headed ditz will last long. But that's just me, right? If you were awake, you'd be able to hear your sister's pathetic cheering about her "favorite ship" finally coming true. It's sad. Boohoo. Did you ever think that maybe she isn't always right? Or try to rememer that just a few days ago I held a gun to your head? Or has the memory equivalent of write's block hit you and you can't remember how things work? Ah well. You'll be hearing more of me and your sister's arguaments as you go about things with your friends. I figure you should know about that so you can keep going about your short sad life instead of dwelling on these arguaments and acting idle like the child of a couple slowly inching closer and closer to divorce. Oh, look. The red-headed bitch is smiling in her sleep. While she's sleeping in your arms. I'd smile from the sweetness if it wasn't giving me a headache. My apologies for droning to you about things instead of providing any other useful comments to you, but after you played that three hour marathon of Portal 2, I've become a GlaDOS fan. And droning on, lying and being a bitch is kind of her thing, and as my cousin, you know being a troublesome millstone is a hobby of mine. I don't understand why you didn't end up more like me, as more people find you more annoying and useless than they ever did me. Ask your parents for instance. They weren't to overly fond of you, but still, in their own twisted way, loved you. Oh wait. They're dead. Sorry I pulled off that bandage. Don't be to put off of me by that fact and the fact that I'm more than willing to hurt you emotionally. They're just facts really. Datapoints. They just are. So, we just need to look around to see things just as pathetic as you parents. That didn't make sense. Did you realise that? Good. That means you're following. Try to keep up. I'll be in touch with you. Don't be surprised if one of your friends comes up to you and tells you they saw me. It happens. I'll be a lot more active than you might expect in the coming days. And if my growing obssession with Miss West begins to disturb you, let me know. I'll happily mention it more often. You know, while I try to increasingly deconstruct your life.

Your sister says hi. Your parents would to, you know. If they were alive.

Goodbye. Do worry. I'll be back soon.

Enjoy your time with the red-headed slut while you have it.

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Added disclaimer: I don't own Portal 2, GLaDOS or Flappy Bird. I would disown the last one if I owned it. I really hate that game. Despite how fun it can be.

So, I just wrote this. Really, just now. Took me... Six hours, nineteen minutes and an indefinite amount of seconds.

I apologise for the delay. But apparently, I'm not sorry enough to not have a delay in the first place. Sorry for that.

Blame CabbieFluffQueen for the small moments between Cat and Robbie. She's been demanding fluff since Chapter... 3, was it? Can't remember. It's almost 8 where I am. I'm supposed to be doing homework, instead, here I am. I decided to put this first instead of homework for once. Your entertainment instead of my future. If this entertains you. If not, your [add what you think of my story here] instead of my future.

Speaking of which, where is she? I haven't seen an update from a few stories spread across this site in a while, actually.

If that lasy bit in italics makes no sense, good. That was my intention.

Hope you enjoyed!