Title: Lily and Thistle

Author: paws_bells

Beta-ed by: MelissaRose85

Characters/Pairing: Sarugaki Hiyori and Hirako Shinji

Type: One-shot Collection (InComplete)

Genre: Romance/Humor

Word Count: 3357

Rating: T (Contains content not suitable for children)

Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite.

Summary: 'Say Please'-verse. The language of flowers. The devoted and passionate Lily. The brave and loyal Thistle. A bouquet of love. One-shot series.

Created on: 17/07/13

Completed on: 19/07/13

Chapter Last Revised on: 28/07/13

The Empress' New Clothes – Part III

"Shinji! What the hell are you doing?! Lemme down!" Hiyori yelled from her now familiar, dangling position at the waist level of her lover. He had his arm wrapped securely around her middle and was swiftly traversing the night skies, easily toting her along like she was nothing more than a small barrel of sake.

She had been startled when he had popped out of literally nowhere to grab her at the natsu matsuri. He had been so fast that there was no time for her to react; the pure white of his haori obscuring her vision for a brief nanosecond, the sharp shift of her center of gravity as he jerked her to him, and then they were airborne. She didn't even have the time to grab the box of takoyaki from Dipshit #1 before Shinji hauled her off, though to her credit, she was able to continue wolfing down a few sticks of yakitori and ikayaki en route to wherever he was taking her. Now though, all the blood was rushing straight to her head and of course the petite female was starting to get pissed. She was not appreciating this mode of transport at all and most particularly was not amused to be carried off when she wasn't even done eating her fill yet. Those two human boys had been exceptionally obliging even without any (literal) arm twisting on her part, and even though they kept crowding her for some reason or another, it wasn't anything she couldn't handle.

She was really surprised by Shinji's presence; she hadn't known that he would be in the Living World today, and even though a (very tiny) part of her was glad to see him, that did not exempt him from her flaring temper for suddenly dragging her away from her free meal.

"Shinji, what's the big idea?! I was eatin' back there! How dare you take me away from my food! I'm still growing, ya know! I need my meals! I'm gonna bite ya if you don't lemme down this instant!" And she was squirming about like a slippery wriggly puppy, clawing ineffectually at his hand and kicking the air behind her futilely, trying to make good on her threat, twisting her head around and about to chomp down on his forearm when he tightened his hold on her warningly. She squeaked when his arm constricted around her middle, feeling about as hard and unyielding as a band of steel, a subtle reminder that however much goofy and a pushover he was to her sometimes, he was still very much a man and very strong.

"Brat, I'll turn you over my knee and spank you like the unruly child that you are," he informed her grimly, and she was so surprised by his tone that she stilled momentarily to look at him. He was looking straight ahead as he continued to move, his handsome, patrician profile unusually tense, and she wondered what had crawled up his ass and died there. Also, if he thought that he could just threaten her into submission or just tell her what to do…

The petite blonde did not even hesitate as she sank her sharp little fangs into his arm defiantly. He swore and deliberately dropped her. She was forced to let go of him as a result, screeching in surprise as she fell a good couple of meters from the air before he swooped down and swiftly caught her again, this time in a secure bridal carry that would hopefully keep those sharp chompers of hers away from his extremities.

"You dropped me!" she yelled accusingly at him.

"You bit me first," he snapped back, appearing every bit as disgruntled as she was. She looked like she was going to reach over and strangle him then, and it was a good thing that they had arrived back at the warehouse or they would probably be duking it out with each other right there. Entering the empty building, he set her back down on her feet and frowned at her like some disapproving prude. She scowled back at him, undaunted. At the same time, the irritated woman reached down and smoothed out the fabric of her skirt over her legs, which had ridden up somewhat during the abrupt trip back. He was watching her with a strange look on his face when she glanced back at him again, and she narrowed her eyes at him, unimpressed by his weird behavior so far.

"What?!" she demanded grouchily.

"Why are you dressed like this?" he demanded at last, asking the question that had been plaguing him the entire time. She was utterly distracting, and now that she was standing right before him, her entire appearance was proving to be a lot more provocative than he had first thought. He actually had to make an effort to keep his eyes trained on her face and not linger all over her body like he was tempted to do so.

Hiyori appeared briefly taken aback by his unexpected question. It was just clothes. Why was he so upset about it? The smaller blonde shrugged then. "Lisa took me to her cosplay shop and made me put it on. She was 'bout ta put a French maid outfit on me next but I bailed."

Shinji twitched at that. Damn that Lisa! What on earth did she think she was doing with other people's girlfriends? He was going to have a talk with the other Vizard about this, that was for sure.

"It's good," she told him then, lifting out an arm and admiring the long, flowing sleeve of the intricately designed fabric. "It doesn't hinder my movements at all, surprisingly enough. I think I can even fight in this."

"Fight?" he echoed faintly, looking at her with rising alarm. She wanted to fight…in that getup?

Hiyori nodded, warming up to the topic. "I can move very easily in this." To prove her point, she pivoted on her heel and executed an absurdly graceful butterfly twist…not so coincidentally granting him a full view of her panties in the process. For the first time ever, the brat successfully gave him a nosebleed without physically landing a hit on him, and the Gobantai Taichou hurriedly clapped his hand over the bottom half of his face to stopper the blood flow.

Hiyori landed lightly back on her feet, looking very pleased with her new discovery. "I'm startin' to see why Lisa prefers to fight in a skirt; there're no restrictions at all. It's better than my tracksuit!"

Shinji was horrified. "You can't be serious," he blurted out, but he was promptly ignored. Hiyori's catlike eyes were already gleaming with impending mischief, a fanged smirk playing on her face.

"Time for a field test!" And by 'field test' she meant to run off to find some poor, unsuspecting thugs to beat up. Shinji quickly recovered enough from his dismay to lunge forward and grab her before she could disappear on him.

"You can't fight like this!" he told her quickly, intent to rid her of the notion before it could fully take root in her mind.

"Why not?" she demanded, trying to shove him away as she did so. "I just showed ya, didn't I? I can still kick very well; don't try your luck with me, baldy!"

"Don't kick at all!" he snapped, snaking an arm firmly around her middle to keep her from wriggling out of his hold. "You shouldn't be kicking in a skirt, stupid!"

"Don't tell me what I can or cannot do, shithead!"

"You're gonna give all of your opponents a free show!" he interjected, visibly irritated that he had to point it out to her.

"So?" Annoyingly enough, she was a lot less concerned over the issue than he would have expected. "It's just panties."

"Just panties-" he broke off in disbelief. Then, his golden eyes narrowed. "Alright, that's it. No skirts for you until you are mentally mature enough to handle it. Where the hell's your tracksuit?"

She was putting up one hell of a fight though – by now, it was no longer about the stupid clothes but more the principle of the matter.

"Hage Shinji!" she barked angrily, baring her little fang as she did so. "I'm tellin' ya, lemme go right now or you're gonna get it!"

"No, thanks. I'm ignorin' ya," he muttered back, keeping a firm hold on her and dodging her attempts to hit him as he did so. "You're not walking around lookin' like that."

Hiyori was immediately pissed.

"What's wrong with that, huh?" she demanded, at the same time trying her best to dig her sharp elbows into his unprotected sides. "You think I can't look cute and pretty?!"

He paused in their struggles to look at her in disbelief. "Are you kiddin' me?" he asked incredulously, and before she could take offense to that, he continued. "You are already plenty cute and pretty, brat. The last thing I need is for every perv out there to realize that as well, so be a good girl and don't give me anymore heart attacks."

His casual, completely unashamed, matter-of-fact statement hit her like a wet salmon to the face. Her eyes widened and she looked at him briefly in shock before she quickly recovered herself. As usual, Hiyori reacted in the only way that she knew how in such a situation. She wasted no time socking him right in the face. His head snapped back from the harsh impact (she never pulled her punches), and swearing, his hand immediately went up to nurse his poor nose.

"Don't treat me like one of yer bimbos!" she growled at him, though the beginnings of a flush started to spread across her cute, freckled cheeks. She shoved him away, then crossed her arms before her chest and stuck her nose in the air disdainfully.

"I don't have any bimbos," he gritted out, scowling at her. "However, what I do have is one bad-tempered little A-cup chibi whose going to get her behind tanned very soon if she continues to insist on being stubborn."

She whirled on him quickly, her face reddening further. "So what if I'm a bad-tempered little A-cup chibi?! That just means I'm spirited, cute and fun-sized! Lots of guys love that!" She stuck out her tongue at him. Quick as lightning, he reached out, grabbed her, and sealed her mouth with his. He moved so swiftly that she barely had time to react. He kissed her, hard.

"Yes, given the opportunity, guys will love you," he spoke harshly against her mouth after a breathless eternity, his fierce golden eyes locked with her dazed ones. "But you are mine, brat, and if you think that I'm gonna let you run around flashing your underwear to all and sundry, something is wrong with your head. So, as much as I do appreciate seeing you all cute and girly like this, that dress is coming off until you're willing to behave more ladylike."

She immediately bristled with offense, but he simply continued. "I love ya, Snaggletooth. You can be wearin' a potato sack and I'll still want ya," he purred softly, persuasively in her ear, and she shivered, defenseless against the feel of his hot breath against her sensitive skin.

"Shinji…" she whispered, her beautiful, feline eyes darkening, turning her face towards his and nuzzling his cheek.

Sensing victory, he relented slightly, and then-

"GO TO HELL!" the little hellion suddenly bellowed right in his ear, and she did it so loudly that he was sure that she had deafened him. He could hear nothing but dull ringing for the next few seconds, and she had startled him so much that he let go of her.

Hiyori immediately took the opportunity to take off, scowling as she did so. The nerve of the dumbass baldy – to tell her that she wasn't ladylike enough (even though that was somewhat true) to pull off wearing that dress and then to try to seduce her out of it-

She was suddenly tackled from behind and wrestled to the ground. Screeching, she rolled onto her back to see her stupid lover straddling her determinedly and pinning her to the floor. The petite blonde turned bright red.

"YOU ARE DEAD! HIRAKO SHINJI!"

He wasn't impressed by her yelling.

"That was a low blow, brat," he muttered, barely resisting the urge to rub at his aching ear. However, he was too used to her various forms of abuse to be completely incapacitated anymore, and besides, using anything less than his entire concentration to subdue Hiyori when she was being so feisty was tantamount to suicide.

"LOW BLOW?! I WILL SHOW YOU LOW BLOW, YOU-"

He blocked her attempts to kick him between the legs and then caught her flailing arms with one large, long-fingered hand before holding them down up over her head. "No hitting below the belt, you little spitfire. If you're not gonna listen to reason, then I have no choice but 'ta use force. Either way, that kimono is coming off by hook or by crook. I'm serious; you're not running around picking fights dressed like that."

"Fuck you!" she blustered, glaring at him, but he just took it in stride.

"We can do that too later, if that's what you want," he responded easily even as his hand reached towards her obi and started to undo the intricate knot at her back. Hiyori was squawking like an indignant hen now only for her protests to be ignored. "This dress looks like it's better suited for lovin' than for actual battle, anyway."

But Hiyori was not going down so easily. She struggled fiercely, plenty of fight encased in that small body of hers. She could care less about the stupid dress, but she hardly appreciated stupid Shinji sticking his nose into her affairs and dictating her life. He had been doing more of that lately and she had been chafing at his highhandedness, grumpy, fiercely independent spirit that she was. Just because they were sort of together now did not mean he got to have a say in everything she did – if she ever felt like streaking through Karakura town or even Soul Society, she would do it and nothing he said would matter, and that was that.

"I'm goin' 'ta kill you, Shinji!"

She was yelling bloody murder when he finally wrested the ties of the kimono off of her singlehandedly, squirming madly like a landed fish under him even as he triumphantly held aloft his prize.

It was then, when the doors of the warehouse creaked open.

Mashiro, Kensei and Rose stood in the doorway, blankly surveying the scene before them. For the briefest of seconds, the three Shinigami just looked plain astonished to see the pair of lovers just as the latter duo were to see them. Then, that moment was immediately gone as the Kyuubantai Taichou promptly slapped his large hand over his Lieutenant's wide eyes. "Oh, for god's sake," Kensei muttered with disbelief. "Can you two not do this in such publicly accessible places?"

At least now they all knew why Shinji had been in such a hurry to leave Seireitei for the Living Realm.

"Kensei, you meanie! I wanna see!" Mashiro whined.

It suddenly occurred to the Fifth Division Captain just how this looked to his colleagues. "Wait a minute here, we are not-"

"Don't just stand there and watch!" Hiyori bellowed at the other Vizards then. "Help me! Ero-Shinji's been trying to get me out of my clothes ever since he got his perverted hands on me!"

"Ero-Shinji-" the disbelieving Hirako cut himself off as he looked at the minx that he was holding under him. Her hair was falling out of her pigtails as a result of their struggles and the fact that her unsecured kimono was sliding off one bare shoulder in complete disarray did not help his case any. He was also still holding her obi in his hand, in full view of the others, and really, that was as much as they wanted to know about the entire matter.

"We are leaving, Mashiro," Kensei grumbled above the din of his Fukutaichou's complaints even as he shot Shinji a significantly dirty look over her head. "Didn't you say that you wanted to check out the matsuri from earlier? Let's go." With that said, he backed out of the building and dragged the green-haired female along with him, leaving Rose to eye the golden-haired couple briefly, his thin lips twitching slightly in mild amusement.

"Shinji," the tall blonde remarked sedately at last. "Hiyori has a delicate build, so you shouldn't be too rough with her." Shinji sputtered at that, turning a dull red. "Well, I'll let you two have your fun now." The Sanbantai Taichou very politely excused himself and vacated the premises, leaving the lovebirds to their devices.

A very chagrinned Shinji was still gawking at the gently shut door in incredulity when he eventually noticed the lack of resistance from Hiyori. Mildly surprised by her sudden docility, he glanced down and quickly saw why she was being so quiet. Lying under him, the petite blonde was biting her lips hard as she struggled not to make a sound, her face red from her efforts and her shoulders shaking as she all but cried with mirth. Irritation inundated him when he abruptly realized what she had done.

"You purposely set me up, didn't you?" he demanded, and she finally lost it. Throwing her head back, she burst into honest gales of hilarity, the sound of her amusement both loud and genuine as she laughed herself sick.

"Hage Shinji-!" she gasped out after a while. "That stupid look on your face-!" She could not go on any further than that, because it was so funny that she erupted into another braying round of laughter just thinking of it.

Shinji was extremely unamused. "I hope you are happy, brat. They all think that I'm some sort of violent sexual deviant now. The entire Gotei 13 will probably hear of this by tomorrow evening, if Mashiro's mouth is anything to go by."

Hiyori continued to giggle madly. "So. Totally. Worth it!" she puffed out, still cackling, and he narrowed his eyes at her, but she just kept right on laughing unrepentantly at him.

Shinji gave up. It wasn't as if he could do anything about the impending rumors now. Loosening his hold on her hands – she was no longer furious or trying to escape him for one – the exasperated Gobantai Taichou just fell forward and let himself slump over his ridiculously mischievous lover, propping his chin over her bare shoulder and groaning aloud.

"You little imp," he muttered exasperatedly into her skin – she was still vibrating with laughter. "Why do I put up with you?"

"Because you are a pervert, Ero-Shinji. That's why," she told him after a while, obviously deeply amused by the entire debacle, and he lifted his head to give her an annoyed look.

"A pervert, am I?" he muttered disgruntledly. To hell with it. "Since that's what you think, I might as well go for broke, eh?"

Hiyori's mirth started to fade away when she noted the particular glint in his eyes. "Are? What are you doing, baldy…?"

His hands had found their way under the lapels of her kimono, and then he was peeling the silk material right off of her body. "I'm fulfilling your expectations," he told her, his callused fingertips running over the soft skin of her stomach and making her shiver.

"If a pervert is what you want, then a pervert is what you'll get, brat."

Hiyori's eyes widened with trepidation. He was serious.

Uh-oh.

"H-Hey, S-Shinji! W-Wait!"

"Too late," he murmured flatly, tugging the bodice of her dress right down to her waist and brushing his lips against her neck. His hand crept up the insides of her thigh, long masculine fingers curling possessively over the sensitive skin there. Her breath hitched.

"Be quiet; this perv's not gonna listen to whatever you say, so just enjoy the ride."

Omake

"I changed my mind," Shinji announced out of the blue a couple of hours later, rolling onto his side to look at Hiyori. Less than an arm's length away from him, the petite blonde was curled up in the corner of the bed, his discarded haori wrapped snugly around her, looking very much like a contented little cat right at that moment, her glowing ochre eyes all sleepy and relaxed. He had the strongest urge to reach over and cuddle her, but refrained from doing so since his brat was only still slowly getting used to the notion of receiving affection from him after their bouts of lovemaking, and was prone to being skittish and defensive if he moved too quickly.

Never mind. He was willing to wait and bide his time. She would come to lay with him willingly soon enough.

For now, she seemed to be paying attention to him though, and so he continued. "I think I quite like that dress of yours, after all. You should wear it more often."

Hiyori was slightly taken aback by his complete turnabout in opinion. He was also being overly cheerful in the creepy way that was making her hackles rise. Her suspicious nature very quickly kicked in. With Shinji, there was always a catch – she just needed to find it. "Why?"

He shrugged lazily at her, looking deceptively innocent as he did so. "Oh, you know. It's as you said; it's a marked improvement from your usual attire, which is completely hideous, you have to admit. That new dress also makes access to you so much…easier, and it's nice and short, to boot. I've decided that I like it quite a lot."

She was immediately puffing up with indignation, the earlier languid quality in her satisfied body disappearing quickly. "What's wrong with my tracksuit?" she demanded, sitting up to tower over him, frowning in affront. She seemed to have forgotten that she was only wearing his haori in her irritation, and the material quickly gaped open, earning him an eyeful, not that he was complaining. It took effort, but he continued to meet her challenging stare with a deliberate, meditative calm. His nonchalant composure in the face of her increasing agitation always irritated her for some reason or another, and he was not above using it against her.

"It's ugly as sin," he commented with a casual shrug that seemed to set her off, judging by the irate flare in her eyes. "You do look so much cuter in that dress."

She scowled. "My tracksuit's not ugly. I love it and I don't care what you think." She paused, glowered some more, and then looked at him with haughty disdain. "And you're wrong. I'm cute in everythin'. You're lucky to have me."

It was good to know that her ego was as healthy as ever. Instead of being exasperated by it, he was just amused. Besides, she wasn't wrong – he found her utterly adorable.

"And you're just perving on me, aren't ya," she continued, sounding disgruntled. She gave him a sharp glare. "Ero-Shinji."

He gave her a mild look in return, unbothered by her accusation. "You are mine, brat. Who else should I perv on if not you?" Then, he deliberately stretched out across the bed sheets like a large, lazy feline, the sleek, sinewy muscles of his lean, rangy form rippling with his languid movement. Her eyes tracked his nude body automatically, and she licked her lips, flustered. He grinned shamelessly, pleased by her reaction.

"You were sayin', darlin'?" he drawled, and she flushed. Her stubborn nature ensured that she would not back down however, and sure enough, she took a short moment to take stock of herself and was very quickly throwing herself back into the argument once more, intent to win against him.

"Well, I'm gonna keep wearin' my tracksuit," she informed him defiantly. "And there's nothin' you can do 'bout it."

She sounded like she was very determined to keep her word too, and he smirked slightly. His brat was such a contrary little thing, and reverse psychology always worked on her like a charm. He hoped that she never found out what he was up to though, or there would be hell to pay.

"That's a pity," he purred then, his golden eyes gleaming with indulgent amusement. Reaching up leisurely, he snagged the lapels of his haori and pulled her down to his level, bending his golden head against the side of her exposed shoulder and laying a slow, deliberate kiss there, smiling inwardly when he felt her quiver lightly in response.

"But I'm sure I'll find other ways to perv on ya, my Hiyori."

::owari::

Questions That I Would Like To Answer Before You Ask:

…and here's the final part to this triple shot! I dearly hope that some of you enjoyed this little miniseries – I certainly had a lot of fun writing it!

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Erm, yes, so in case some of you didn't get the point of the omake, the reason why Hiyori isn't running around kicking ass in a dress (and flashing her panties to all the poor/lucky fellas whose asses are being kicked) is because Shinji tricked her out of wearing it. It's kind of crafty and manipulative of him, but hey, a guy's got to do what a guy's got to do, and I don't think the world is quite ready to take on a miniskirt-wearing Hiyori yet, haha.

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Also, notice how Hiyori is always giving Shinji nosebleeds in the series? Well, now she has another new way to do it!

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For those who are curious to know what a 'butterfly twist' looks like, I have attached a link (under the 'Extras' heading) on my profile page. Feel free to take a look!

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FYI, Takoyaki, Yakitori and Ikayaki are all traditional Japanese street foods. I highly recommend trying them if you have the opportunity to do so – they are super yummy.

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Oh man, I'm just so happy to hear from the ShiYori readers. You guys just make my day so much and I don't feel so alone in my feels, haha. As always, thanks for faving, thanks for following, and thanks for reading!

(Oh, and thanks for all the lovely reviews too, of course! =D)

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Your reviews fuel my passion for writing. So please leave a comment if you like this fic!

-paws