AUTHORS NOTE

I am so, so sorry.

(If you understand the reference, I love you already.)

I have not updated this story in a bit under a year and have left you sitting there, waiting for the next chapter. I'd give an excuse, but the real reason is that I am the Pirate King of procrastination. I think I'm a bit evil too. Or am I? I can't tell these days.

About a month ago, a fan sent me a PM reminding me about the story. I have taken it to heart, and finished the final chapter *bows dramatically*. Hate it if you like, love it if you want, I really don't mind either way. I do hope you enjoy it though.

I may or may not have left references in this chapter.

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

My hands were cuffed behind my back, and my heart was in my throat as I was led into the police station.

I never got nervous about stuff like this, I could take Barney on handcuffed, so I should be able to take on a couple of cops who didn't have too much training. Right?

Right.

I sucked in a breath, watching as Barney left me with the other cops. In less than an hour, Barney would contact me and tell me where he was. No matter how thoroughly the cops searched me, they wouldn't find the tiny, plastic radio embedded under my skin. It was no bigger than my fingernail, and it was under my tattoo, so nobody would find it.

True, it would be painful to get it out from under my skin when it was dead, but I could do it.

The cops searched me (you really don't need any details about how they went about that) and led me up to a cell. Before the man could even open the door, I had him on the ground, unconscious.

I hit my shoulder where the radio was embedded, and a crackling noise ensued. Then Barney's voice came up over the small speaker.

"I'm here, Lee."

"That's good," I said, flipping a cop and running over to where they had put my possessions. I started to take off my jumpsuit and put on my regular clothes. "Where are you?"

"On West Main Street, a block from the station."

I ran out of the station. "I'll be there."

I continued running until I found Barney with his car, then I hopped in.

"What took you so long?" Barney asked as he started up the ignition and started to drive down towards the highway.

"Easy for you to say, you didn't have to run," I panted as I stared at the road in front of us. "How far until we get to Lacy?"

"Another two miles," Barney said as he floored the accelerator.

Splendid.

Needless to say, with Barney's driving, the two miles went by quickly. When we arrived at the brick building with the words "HOUSE REPAIR" emblazoned across it, my mood had already reached the point where I wouldn't think twice about putting a bullet in your throat.

Barney stood behind me, pistol drawn, as I kicked in the door and ran inside. A man stood behind a counter, his face registering shock as his hand went to the small of his back.

I fired.

He gripped his wounded shoulder, face full of terror as I approached him and kicked him in his wounded appendage.

"Where's Lacy?" I growled as he whimpered in pain, shaking his head.

I kicked him again. "WHERE?"

"Th... the attic!" The man said, tears runnin down his face.

Barney shook his head. "Liar."

Raising my gun, I left the finishing bullet in his noggin.

"There is no attic. We're going down to the basement," Barney said. "It's our best bet."

I nodded, gun at the ready. I provided backup for Barney as we quickly strode down the stairs.

At the end of the stairs leading down, there was a hallway, with a door on each side.

"Barney?" I asked, knowing that he looked at the blueprints beforehand and he probably had the best bet of guessing the correct door.

"Left," he said, and I stood behind him as he kicked open the door.

Oh pickles.

No Lacy, just goons- a lot of goons.

I didn't remember much, just a lot of banging, blood, the sound of bodies hitting the floor, and the smell of gunpowder.

The smoke cleared, and Barney and I remained intact. We turned to the door behind us.

"Kick it," I said, and he complied.

Four gunmen, all in the back of the room. It took us less than a split second to finish them off.

Lacy. Gagged and tied to a chair. A man holding a gun to her head.

"Drop your weapons, and I'll let her-"

I fired, and blood spattered across the wall as the man fell limp.

Lacy made a strange noise as I hurried to untie her. Quickly cutting off her gag, I set to work on the rest of her bonds while she cried in relief and sputtered on about how she was kidnapped and kept here.

I wrapped my arm around her waist, supporting her weight as I led her up to the car. Barney followed, watching for any stray gunmen that might take us out while we were off of our guard.

And then, we were on our way home.

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

A day or two later, the Police found a bunch of incriminating evidence against the Mercenary group that kidnapped Lacy. Apparently, they kept record of everything, including the people they killed and tried to frame. Idjits.

Since the whole ordeal is over, Lacy has been able to relax a little. She wants to move to another house, though. I've already changed apartments.

Thankfully, the police have forgiven me for humiliating them.