Affairs of the Heart
Tony & Pepper, Ironman
July 14th 2018
Tony and Pepper have finally admitted to and acted on their feelings for one another. Their ensuing pursuit of happiness is filled with the twists and turns one would expect for a couple as prolific as they are. The in-between story we missed as they built their relationship together from IM2 to The Avengers.
Disclaimer: I own nothing to do with Ironman and/or Marvel. I just enjoy playing with them.
Chapter Six
Pepper was surprised to find that after three days away from work, getting her game face back on was no trouble at all, even with her uncharacteristically emotional attitude lately. She figured she deserved to cut herself some slack in that regard though, considering that her entire personal life had just been turned on its head. Not to mention her professional life.
She was, then, dumbfounded when she arrived back at the office with Tony by her side, who had insisted for the first time during their working relationship to accompany her, to complete and utter normalcy. No whispers, no stares, no change in treatment whatsoever – and finally, the stress she hadn't even known she'd been carrying with her drained away and she almost cried with the relief of it; this aspect of her life that she greatly coveted was unchanged.
Well. Almost unchanged.
She was, of course, back in her old role as Tony's personal assistant, after they once again were unable to come to an agreement regarding the position of CEO. The line of professionalism that had existed between them for years was clearly out the window in his eyes however, and nothing she said or did was putting him into a more acceptable headspace. She was torn for the majority of the day between wanting to strangle him and, embarrassingly enough, wanting to relieve herself of the frustration coursing through her body after another night of Tony being an absolute gentleman. It didn't help when she consistently found him watching her throughout the day, dark eyes intense and far too full of emotion to possibly belong to Tony Stark. She was having an exceptionally hard time reminding herself that she wanted to take things slowly as the years of sexual tension they'd danced around came back to bite her.
After the last meeting of the day, she made a last minute decision to work from home for the rest of the evening and texted Happy to pick her up from the lobby. She had to get away from him to breathe, scared of the intensity of her feelings. It was like the past few days had uncapped everything she'd been burying for so long and it was bursting forth like a cascade with no end in sight. This is so not me, she thought, but she also knew she'd never felt this way for anyone before and she had no frame of reference. She'd dated, of course, though sparingly due to her schedule. Nobody had ever really held her attention like this and it rattled her how her once very predictable and scheduled life had crumbled so quickly because of a man. A man who could ruin her if she wasn't careful, both in reputation and her heart. The worst part of it was that she very much didn't want to be careful; not anymore, not with him.
She managed to dodge him in her escape and she took what felt like her first complete breath all day once she was in the car, trying to relax as she leaned against the seat. She ignoredthe small niggling guilt settling in her stomach; she was certainly allowed to go home to her own space and working from there was definitely nothing new for her.
You're in a relationship now, with someone who has no idea what he's supposed to do and you're running.
"Hey, do you want me to drop you off out front or..." Happy trailed off and she knew he was hinting at a possible papparazzi presence.
"Yes, please. I'm sure it's fine... They're probably still stationed outside the mansion anyways." She saw him nod in the rearview mirror and she was left to her thoughts again as he turned up the music a little bit. It wasn't until she'd waved goodbye to Happy, trudged upstairs to her apartment and settled into her bed with a glass of wine that she looked at her phone.
Where'd you go?
She sipped at her wine and ignored his text message, needing the space. For a couple of hours she diligently worked through the stack of paperwork she'd brought home and the mountain of emails that had built up over the days and felt the familiar smug sense of accomplishment she loved flow through her. She'd gone from one to two to three glasses of wine and she was glad when she had finally finished everything because she was getting to a point she rarely ever did – tipsy.
She picked up her phone, which had laid largely ignored beside her and felt a stab of annoyance when she saw no more text messages. Trying not to investigate her knee-jerk reaction, she instead got up to refill her wine glass again, paying no attention to how much she had had to drink already. She rarely indulged in alcohol, quite frankly having no time in the day for it, and when she did she was typically a lost cause for reigning herself in once she made it past one; her tolerance was shamefully low. As a result, she stayed away from it as much as possible. Wobbling back to her bedroom, wine bottle also in hand, she put the bottle down on the table and snatched up her phone and, with a little trouble, managed to send a quick text back.
In my closet.
She put her glass down as well and stumbled to said closet, letting out a small giggle as she tried to undress and put on some pajamas. It was just past eight o'clock and her dress suit was just not comfortable and she was starting to feel more than a little warm from the wine. She made it back to bed and flopped down, not surprised to find an immediate response from Tony.
What?
She snorted and almost didn't respond, taking another too-large mouthful of wine.
I don't know.
Not even a minute had passed and her phone lit up. Are you alright?
Her heart sped up in her chest and she felt light headed as she stood on the pecipice of the moment, one she knew would change everything. It would just be so easy like this. She held her breath and with all of her liquid courage sent back one simple word.
No.
Guilt striked her, hot and sharp, knowing he was probably going to have a panic attack the second he read it, but it would get him here the fastest. And she needed to act on this right now. Her hands were shaking, she realized and she could only hope more wine would settle her nerves once she got past tipsy and straight into drunk. What am I doing?
She wondered briefly how he was going to get into her apartment, assuming he'd taken the suit rather than a car – and she did assume – when his voice rang out from what sounded like her living room. "Pepper?"
She frowned at the tiny note of panic she heard and then rolled her eyes, giggling at the realization that she'd never locked her window after the first night he'd come by, knowing she was going to hear about that later. She heard him step out of the suit, his heavy footfalls sounding closer and closer and she felt consumed with desire suddenly, licking her lips in anticipation. Then he was in her doorway, looking as irresistable as usual and she didn't think. Before he even had a chance to speak, she crossed the room unsteadily and threw her arms around his neck, pressing herself as close to him as she could, kissing him with a fierceness that startled even her.
He was tense for just a moment before he moaned into her mouth, returning the kiss with fervor, wrapping his arms around her crushingly tight. He definitely knew what he was doing and she whimpered, pulling at the hem of his shirt frantically, trying to get it off of him. That seemed to break the trance he was in as he pulled back suddenly, saying her name and she cut him off before he could say more, pulling her own shirt over her head.
"Don't talk," she pleaded. She was too far gone now to recognize the look on his face for what it was, just wanting more. She didn't want to even acknowledge the fact that he had pulled back as she let the flimsy tank top fall to the floor, standing in only her bra and shorts.
"Pepper-"
She silenced him again with another forceful kiss, her tongue sliding along his lower lip for permission and he opened his mouth to bite hers gently, moaning a little harsher this time and it sent a thrill down her spine as she pushed her shorts down, shimmying out of them while trying to undo his jeans.
"Pepper, listen to me," he said against her mouth, grabbing her hands and pulling them up towards his chest, "this can't happen-"
"Tony, shut up." She bit out, not understanding why he wanted her to stop, running her hands over the muscles of his shoulders and down his arms instead, pulling his earlobe between her teeth. He never let her go but they were moving and suddenly she was tumbling backwards, having hit the edge of the bed and her heart was somewhere in her throat, choking her with excitement.
He pulled back from her, straddling her and holding her arms gently down. "I can't, Pepper. Not like this."
She felt like a bucket of ice cold water had been poured over her at the look in his eyes and she just stared back numbly, heading spinning with intoxication and arousal. "Tony-"
"Not like this, Pepper. I've never seen you this drunk in my life. This isn't how you want our first time to be."
She felt herself deflating and the sting of tears in her eyes had her struggling to get away from him. "Let me go."
He fixed her with as serious a look as she'd ever seen from him before, still not letting her go. "Don't be one of those women, Pepper. I want you. I want you so badly it hurts." He pressed his pelvis against hers so she could feel the truth of his words. " But I am way too serious about us to let this happen. I want you to be one hundred percent with me when the time comes. And you do too, trust me," he quipped slyly, clearly trying to lighten the mood of the room.
"You're not going to want me without the fun booze," she muttered after a pregnant pause, staring at anything but him now. She knew she was being ridiculous in the face of his heartfelt words, but rejection was still rejection and it hurt more than she cared to admit.
"You're an idiot, Potts."
"What!?" She screeched, struggling anew. He laughed and leaned down for another kiss, sapping all of the fight out of her all over again. Finally he lifted himself off of her and whistled low, eyes on the wine bottle as he settled next to her on the bed.
"How do you feel?" He asked with a grin, laying back on the pillows with his hands behind his head. She was grateful, secretly, that he was giving her such an easy out and not teasing her mercilessly.
"Like I've had too many."
"I'll say. You believe me, right?"
"About what..." She muttered, picking at the comforter miserably. She was wound so tight she thought she was going to explode.
"You know I want you." It wasn't so much a question as it was a statement, but she nodded nonetheless. "Then stop brooding."
"You seem pretty unaffected to me, given what just happened." She hated the way her words were starting to slur, making her sound a lot less angry than she felt.
His eyes darkened as he stared at her, lingering on her almost naked body a beat longer than necessary. "Trust me, all I can think about is everything I want to do to you right now, but I'm the only clearheaded one here so I'm trying to behave." He lifted his shirt up over his head at that and tossed it at her. "Put that on before I lose it."
She tugged it on, breathing deeply as his scent surrounded her. Her head was really starting to hurt now that all her emotions were crashing and burning and she was sitting still on the bed.
He stood, leaving her bedroom long enough to turn off the lights in the living room. She could hear him snap the window lock shut and stifled another laugh, standing up from the bed only to promptly fall onto the floor. He popped his head in to make sure she hadn't hurt herself before disappearing for a couple of minutes. She could hear him rummaging around in the kitchen and thought briefly about trying to get back into bed, but she was suddenly flooded with overwhelming exhaustion and the undeniable knowledge that she would never make it if she tried. He returned with water and advil, placing them on the table and removing the wine, leaving again.
She closed her eyes to stop the room from spinning and then he was there, one arm behind her back and the other under her knees, lifting her up onto the bed. Her head lolled with dizziness against his shoulder. He coaxed the pills into her mouth and helped her with the water, easing the covers back and laying her down. He quickly shucked his jeans off, sliding in behind her and pulling her back against him, his breath hot on her neck and she sighed.
"I'm sorry." She said quietly into the darkness of the room. He was right, she was an idiot; she had known for a long time that he wanted her. "I just don't think I... I don't think I'm what you usually want in bed," she slurred, grasping his hand tightly with hers. "I'm probably not as exciting or adventurous or-"
He groaned in exasperation. "Potts, go to sleep."
She twisted around in his arms, trying to lock eyes with him. "Tony," she whispered, "I'm serious."
"You are everything I want. Whatever we do in bed together, we're going to figure it out between the two of us. I'm trying to be better for you, okay, so stop making it so difficult." He whined and she could still feel the evidence of what he was saying pressing against her. She fought down another wave of arousal, trying to think about anything but him and how he felt against her.
She probably should be surprised with how frank and honest he was being tonight, but figured her drunk state was a safety net of sorts for him, just like it was for her. "Okay."
He kissed her forehead gently. "Sleep. You're going to hate yourself in the morning."
She closed her eyes, relaxing in his embrace.
"Don't think I've forgotten about the unlocked window." He tacked on just as she drifted off to sleep.
AN: Oh god, I'm panicking about this chapter. Is it too out of character? It was harder to write this one than I thought it would be! Fun, though. ;)