N: enjoy! It's the holiday weekend so I'll be spending my days off outside!

Jane

"Sam Ross. Thirty-two-year-old white Male with an extensive rap sheet. Simple burglaries to vicious assaults. It looks like he got caught up in a drug gang linked with the cartel. He spent fifteen years up in state." Frost flicked through the file as I paced around my desk. My adrenaline was already reaching a tipping point.

"Where is he?" I wanted to get my hands on this jerk and maybe have him fall down a few stairs.

"Narco is watching him for us. Ross lives in southie in his grandmother's house." Frost set the file on my desk, taking a step closer. "Settle down Jane. We can't go barging in, slapping cuffs on him. We can only go talk to him as a possible suspect. You and I both know we need more evidence."

"Maura recognized him!" I threw my hands up in frustration. "She recognized her attacker! What else do we need!"

"We need more than an amnesiac woman's word." Frost paused, staring me down as he saw the fire in my eyes. "She doesn't know you, you know how that'd go over in court. Half of Boston see you as the dynamic duo. Rizzoli and Isles. Lady superheroes."

I sighed, clenching my jaw as I knew Frost was right. But it didn't reign in my desire for justice and a side of revenge. His words also struck hard. Maura still didn't know me. Regardless of what happened between us in the last handful of hours, I was still a mystery. I had a sinking feeling that Maura's PTSD was doing most of the talking for her. Although she was tough and took no shit from anyone in her autopsy room, outside was a different story. Years of lonely social abandonment had left her very awkward and unsure, especially after the Rizzoli family rolled into her life. Our loud, obnoxious form of love had broken a few of her walls down, but it also left her confused as to what to do with the feelings being unconditionally loved brought.

Maybe she was jumping the gun with her feelings. Desperate to grabbed onto something, or someone, that felt safe. Hold onto it as the nightmares edged over into the daylight. I would know, I struggled with my own nightmares for years and had latched onto Maura in my own desperation. I looked up at my partner. Frost was staring at me with a concerned look. "Jane, you can talk to me. I've got two good ears and a ton of patience."

I chuckled, running a hand through messy hair. I hadn't even bothered to change or clean up. I was still wearing a wrinkled suit and bedhead. "I don't think you'd understand."

"You should try me. You look at Maura the same way my mom looks at her wife." Frost leaned in closer, so our conversation wouldn't reach the entire bullpen. "And the way she looks at you."

I huffed shaking my head. "That was old Maura." I hesitated before asking. "Barry, do you think feelings are amplified after a traumatic event? And that a person could just be feeling something out of fear? Whether its love or desire to love?" I waved my hands, "You know, like phantom feelings. Ones that fade in time after the trauma stops being fresh?"

Barry shrugged, "I mean phantom feelings is a reality. Dr. Beauchamp told me and explained the doc would have a hard adjustment period. Dr. Isles is a genius, so her basic nature would be to fall back on scientific reasoning and solutions to get her back on her feet. I've noticed she's very uptight since she woke up. You know, like old Maura when she first started here. Uptight, snooty, and totally unable to take a joke. I saw her struggle with your ma the day she left the hospital. All rigid and uncomfortable. "Frost cocked an eyebrow. "She loves your ma, always hugging her first. So, yeah maybe there's a theory. Why do you ask?"

I swallowed hard. All of my rational and irrational fears colliding at once. Maura was a genius, and she of all people would know the psychological effects of trauma. But Maura also had a significant head injury and might be playing normal to ease the rest of us.

I did tell her I loved her first, she was probably playing off that.

There was just too much, and my brain was starting to short out. My own psyche was starting to psyche me out. "Naw, Frost. Just thinking out loud. Everything is perfect as perfect with a head injury could be." What I wanted to really say was, no Frost, nothing is okay. I'm drowning in my ridiculous self-doubt and fear. I'm not the big bad detective you see, I'm a giant soft serve whose heart was lost a long time ago to a familiar blonde doctor. I smiled through my internal rant.

He eyed me for a moment, "She'll remember. If not, think of this as a chance to start again. Maybe this time you can face your feelings." He paused as his cell phone buzzed. "It's narco. They're about to arrest Ross for dealing. Guess he did a deal right in front of UC car."

I flexed my hands, cracking a few knuckles. "Tell narco we'll be there in ten. I want a crack at this kid before he loses it when they tell him he's headed back upstate."

I grabbed my coat, double checking my gun was on my hip and rushed out of the bullpen. Frost three steps behind me, mumbling something about getting ready for a fight.

Maura

Frankie was asleep in the chair across from mep, snoring exactly like his sister. I'd moved from the couch to the small office next to the guest room. I couldn't go back to sleep after Jane left. I couldn't stop thinking about our conversation and discussing my newfound feelings for her.

So, I'd opted to sit and search through more of my files, hoping to jog any memories to the front of my mind. I was getting more of my memories back, mainly of the night I was attacked. I had a theory if I could drown my mind with my past life with jane, my brain would open those closed doors.

I was swiping through a set of photos from what looked like last summer. Jane and I were at a baseball game. I was covered head to toe in Red Sox clothing and holding one of those giant foam fingers I never understood the purpose of. Jane was next to me, bright red cheeks as if she was embarrassed by me or just as happy as I appeared to be.

I ran my finger along the computer screen, fighting back emotions as I couldn't remember that day. Nor could I remember where I had tucked the sports clothing away in my closet. I hated seeing jane so happy with me and not being able to tap into that to make her happy now. I saw the shadows in her eyes as she stepped out of my embrace. Uncertainty flooding those big brown eyes.

"Maura? Are you okay honey?" Angela's voice broke me from my stinking thoughts.

I turned to her standing in the doorway and smiled. The Rizzoli matriarch was dressed in fuzzy pink pajamas topped with even fuzzier pink slippers. I nodded slowly, absently rubbing at the side of my head that had been injured. It still ached when I moved too much, thought too much. "I didn't want to bother Frankie."

Angela laughed, waving her hand. "You should've. Falling asleep on his watch!" She moved closer, peering over my shoulder at the laptop. "Your first baseball game! Janie was so excited to take you! She bought you everything you're wearing in that picture, then regretted it when you decided to wear it all at once."

I smiled, sighing. "I don't know what to do, Angela. Nothing is triggering my memories." I looked up, "If I asked you a question, would you tell me the truth?"

Angela's eyes widened. "Um, sure Maura."

"Jane and I." I glanced at the picture. "I told her that I feel something for her that goes past friendship. I don't know if it's new feelings or old feelings I'm finally speaking on. I know my doctor would suggest my sudden confession would be PTSD related, that I'm looking to find a sense of normalcy." I turned to Jane's mother. "But in my heart, it's the truth. I adore your daughter and not because she's my best friend. My question is, did I ever exhibit a behavior that suggested I had strong feelings for Jane before my incident?"

Angela laughed, shaking her head as she sat on the edge of the desk. "You two are a pair, that's for sure." She picked up my hand. "Truth is this, Maura. I saw that my daughter was in love with you the first time she brought you to Sunday dinner. Although I didn't understand it first, I gave up thinking about it as I saw how important you were to her. How good you are for her." She clasped my hands in both of her strong ones, pushing her own brand of motherly love into my body. "Jane confessed she was in love with you a few days ago. I only bring it up because knowing my daughter, she's overthinking everything and will probably disappear. You're her soul mate but has never had a good relationship in her life, so she's scared. It doesn't help your beautiful brain lost her."

I sniffled, "What do I do? How can I prove to her and my blank mind that these feelings I have for her are real? I want them. I want these feelings and I want Jane in my life. It could be my PTSD, but I don't think so. I've spent hours looking at pictures of us and the way we look at each other. No one has ever looked at me like Jane does."

"And Jane has never looked at anyone the way she looks at you. The night we thought we lost you, we almost lost Jane. Jane was miserable and never left your room unless it was to go to work per Cavanaugh's orders. I caught her a few times praying that if you woke up, she'd tell you how much she loved you every day." Angela grinned. "I have an idea!" She hopped off the edge of the desk.

I watched her move around in excitement. "What is it?"

"Woo her! Ask her out on date, buy her a bouquet, write her poems! Romance the pants off my stubborn daughter. I think it's the only way to prove that what you feel now, is never going away." Angela clapped her hands together, "My cousin Carla owns a flower shop. We can make an order in the morning.

I would've chased off the idea as silly, but the fluttering in my stomach told me it was a great idea. I would show Jane how much I loved her, not just through words but actions. I would do the things I should've done in the past when I had her in all of my memories. "I just have to make new ones with her."

I stood up slowly, "Angela, can you help me upstairs? I need to search my closet for the Red Sox shirt Jane bought me."

Angela grinned, "That won't be too hard. Jane left it on your bed. You wear that shirt to bed every night, the thing is almost see through." She winked at me as I blushed, and gently grasped my arm. "Come on let's go brainstorm perfect dates."

Jane

I barely hear Frost shouting my name. I only heard my boots smacking on the concrete as I ran after Ross. The little shit had bolted the second he saw my face. I wanted to kick Narco for not handcuffing him, who cares if he was cooperating, he was a shit. A shit who beat up Maura.

I spun around a corner, Ross's yellow shirt a few steps ahead of me. "Ross! Stop! Make this easier! You know I can run faster and longer than you!"

Ross turned to flip me off and barreled right into the side of a parked car. I smirked as he groaned and fell to the ground. I was ontop of him in a second, "Tell me why you picked Maura?! Why her?"

"Get the fuck off of me!" Ross squirmed, freeing an arm and swung at me. Catching me right across the cheek, knocking me off of him. I instantly felt that he split open my cheek, and it made me even angrier. Ross scrambled to his feet, preparing to run. I was faster and speared him back into the car, satisfied when I heard him grunt on impact.

"I'm not getting the fuck off of you! You're under arrest for the assault of Dr. Maura Isles." I kicked his feet out from under him, kneeling on his back to slap handcuffs on him. "Now, tell me why you did it and I might put you in a nicer cell."

Ross squirmed underneath me, "I was paid to do it! Someone hates your girlfriend more than I do." He groaned when I pressed my knee deeper into his back. "Stop it! This is police brutality!"

I chuckled, easing up and leaning closer to his face. "Who did it?" I was trying so hard to keep my anger from spiraling out of control, but I could hear the footsteps and sirens of my backup coming.

Ross looked in my eyes, "I don't want to go back to prison as a snitch. Look in my drug charges, then call my lawyer. He'll work with you. He knows who paid me be the patsy for the attack. I didn't actually hurt the woman, they paid me to take the fall and admit to it. I'm a bastard junkie, but I couldn't hurt a woman like that. Even if her testimony sent me up for fifteen to twenty. I heard she doesn't remember shit, including you. That must suck to have the love of your life forget you." Ross laughed, spitting out blood catching the look on my face. "They know everything about you and Dr. Isles. The people who hired me wanted to hurt you just as much as you, Detective Jane Rizzoli."

I stared at Ross, my gut telling me he was telling the truth. I also wanted to beat the smirk off his face. I stood up just as Frost and the narco team swarmed us. I pushed past the yelling cops and walked away, Frost on my tail.

"Jane? I got an ambulance coming to look at your cheek. Ross hit you?"

I nodded, swiping away at the blood as Ross's words sank in. "Yeah. Make sure he gets charged with assaulting a police officer." I looked at the blood soaking into my jacket. "He's willing to talk if we deal. Tell Martinez I need a favor and have him interview Ross at one of his undercover locations. Ross was paid to set up Maura, he told me he didn't attack her, just facilitated it. Martinez will get answers out of him."

"I'll tell him now. Will you just wait here for the bus? Your face is a mess, Jane." Frost spoke softly, doing his best not to prod me for more. "I'll take you back to the doc's after we get you patched up."

I shook my head, "No. I'm going home. It's better if I stay away from Maura until we get answers out of Ross." I glanced at Frost, "He said something about wanting to hurt me as much as they hurt Maura. All I do is hurt her, Frost." I tipped my head down and walked to the corner where the ambulance was pulling up. "Maybe it's for the best she forgot me."

Maura

"Jane, don't be stupid." Angela was on her phone, pacing around the kitchen. "Yes, I can stay with Maura, but you should be here."

I walked over to her, my stomach turning. I pressed a hand against it, wrinkling the soft material of the Red Sox shirt I just put on. It smelled a lot like Jane and I was drawn to wrap myself in anything that reminded me of her.

"Fine. Whatever." Angela hung up and tossed the phone across the counter. "Jane isn't coming over. She claims her interview is going to take all night."

I nodded, "Did she say anything about the man I saw in my nightmare?"

Angela shrugged, "Nope. She only said she was going home to change her clothes and that would be heading back to the station. My daughter is a workaholic!"

I almost agreed with her, but for whatever reason I didn't believe Jane was working. I'd already figured out that when Jane was scared, she would have clipped conversations with her mother, or anyone else. Something had to have happened at the interview and Jane was hiding. I shifted on my cane, "Angela, can you wake Frankie up and ask him to drive me over to Jane's?"

"I can take you, Maura. Then I can smack some sense into her." Angela growled.

I laughed, "That's exactly why I suggested Frankie. You going over there now would end in a mother daughter argument."

Angela threw her hands up, "Fine! But take some leftovers to her. She probably hasn't eaten all day, another reason why she's cranky." She walked to the couch, nudging Frankie on the shoulder. "Frankie! Wake up, you're taking Maura to Jane's."

He groaned and rolled over, grumbling as he pulled his shoes on. It was clear he heard the conversation and wanted no part in it. He grabbed his car keys, grabbed my coat and walked over. He helped me into my coat before a tub of pasta was shoved into his free hand. Nothing else was said as he walked me to the car, just Angela hollering about her stubborn children.

I shoo'd Frankie after he walked me to Jane's door. I knew Jane was home by the light coming out from under the door and the pitter patter of Jo Friday's feet as she scampered around. I took in a breath and knocked gently. I had to knock twice before Jane came to the door, opening it quickly. "Ma, I wish you would listen when I say leave me alone."

I gasped when I saw Jane's face. A large bandage covered most of her cheek with a large bruise forming under her eye. "Jane! What happened?" I immediately reached for her. My heart raced at the sight of Jane hurt.

Jane stepped back, her eyes wide with surprise. "Maura? What are you doing here? How did you get here?"

I pressed my hand against her cheek, gently probing the injury. "Is anything broken? Did you have a xray? Her hair was pulled back, giving me an incredible view of her neck and jawbone. If anything, Jane Rizzoli was an incredibly beautiful woman. I would have to be blind not to be attracted to her in the slightest. Even if old me wasn't attracted to her, I was now. I had to swallow hard as her eyes met mine in an intense gaze.

Jane took my hand, pulling it down. "Why are we answering questions with more questions?" She held my hand, looking down at the shirt I wore. Her eyes welled up. "Why are you wearing my shirt?"

I smiled, "I thought it was mine. I put it on because it smelled like you." I wove my fingers into hers, "Can I come in and look at your cheek?"

Jane hesitated before nodding and guiding me into her apartment. She let go of my hand, moving it to my elbow as she led me to the couch. She then sat next to me, "Please tell me you didn't drive over here. I'd hate to suspend your license, doctor."

I leaned forward, peeling the bandage up. I saw a series of neat stitches holding together red angry skin. "Who punched you? And don't tell me it was a punch. I can tell by the impact and the way the skin separated that it was a closed fist punch." I placed the bandage back, running a light finger over the tape. I smiled as Jane blushed and moved her head away.

"Suspect ran. I chased, and we had a scuffle." Jane clenched her fists. Another tell of hers that she was hiding something. I had started to pick up most of Jane's physical cues, and I could almost read her like a book.

I nodded, deciding not to push her. When she kept her head down, focused on her scars, it meant she wouldn't talk. I grabbed her hand, taking it in mine so I could massage her hand. "That's not the whole truth, Jane. But you'll tell me when you want to." I heard her sigh and lean into me. "After you left, I spent a few hours looking at pictures. I still can't remember us, but I think it's time we start over. Start a new us and move forward. If I do wake up and remember it all, I want you to know that the way I feel about you now won't change." I glanced at Jane, watching me with intensity. "I think the old me was afraid of the strong feelings she had for you and hid it. I'm wondering if my incident was a sign, a sign to embrace things I might not have understood in the past, and deal with it." I pulled Jane's hand up, kissing the top of her hand softly. "I really like you Jane Rizzoli and I was wondering if could take you out on a date? We could go to a baseball game."

Jane laughed nervously, "Maura, it's November. Baseball is over." She stared at me for a few seconds. "Are you serious?"

I nodded, "When have I never been serious?"

Jane rolled her eyes, "That's a true statement if I ever heard one." She swallowed hard, thinking. "Before I say yes, I want you to know I will do whatever it takes to protect you. Even if it means I have to disappear for a while, I'm always going to care for you. I'm always going to protect you."

I looked at her confused, "That's a strange comment, dare I ask why you brought it up?"

Jane shook her head, leaning over to kiss me on the cheek. "Later. I want to absorb this moment. The day Maura Isles asked me out."

I grinned, blushing, "Is that a yes?"

"Yes, it's a yes." She tucked a few strands of hair behind my ear. "But I'm driving." She pulled me into her arms, swallowing me in her strong warmth. There was something that was bothering her, I saw it in her eyes. It had something to do with the man I saw in my nightmare. But I was tired of letting my nightmares control me. "Jane?"

"Mmm?" Jane's breathing was evening out.

"Are you wearing my shirt?" I'd recognized the old BCU shirt the second she opened the door.

"Yes. It smelled like you." Jane hugged me closer, before standing up, pulling me with her. "Let's go get some sleep. I'll tell Frankie to go home." She grabbed her cell phone and typed out a quick message. She then led me to the bedroom. She tucked me in before rolling in her side. I scooted closer to her, throwing an arm over her stomach, laying my head over her heart.

Jane covered my hand with hers, and as I closed my eyes I had a flicker of a memory of us doing this exact same thing. And feeling the exact same thing I did now. Love.