I do not own Star Wars

Chapter Nine

Legs hanging off the sides of the hammock, feet resting on the floor, Kylo woke to the sound of sand blasting against the exterior of the metal walls. At first he was perplexed by the noise, but once he registered where he was, he knew what had happened.

He bolted upright, swinging his leg over the hammock only to have his boot get caught on the connecting rope at the end. His body lurched and he fell to the ground before scrambling to regain his balance. Once in control, he ducked into the short tunnel that led outside.

Sand.

Sand was everywhere, thick clouds of it providing no visibility to the outside desert planet. Wind blasted into his face, stinging his eyes from the grit it so violently carried. Skin burning, he turned away from the exit, rubbing the sand from his features. Cautiously, he pivoted back around to face the gale storm, squinting his eyes to get a view of his ship.

He couldn't even see a faint outline.

The sand kept searing his skin and eyes as he stood there, weighing his options. He could cover his face and try to find the ship out in the middle of the tempest, but the likely hood of getting lost along the way was very high. Even if he could find the ship, he wouldn't be able to fly through these conditions.

The answer was the obvious one: he would have to stay where he was, inside the girl's home.

But first he had to close the hatch. Too much sand was starting to get inside as the winds were becoming increasingly aggressive.

Removing his cloak, Kylo began to wrap it around his face and neck, a thinly veiled piece of armor that was going to have to suffice. Wanting to spare his eyes, he would have to find and close the hatch while blind. Once completely covered, he shifted over to the right side of the exit and took a deep breath before plunging into the impertinent squall.

So many sensations hit him at once that he was shocked into immobility. The wind exploded in his ears, almost popping his eardrums as the force of the storm plastered the cloak to his face, threatening to suffocate him. His hands held onto the metal exterior as he quickly realized they were exposed to the elements. The deep, searing pain rapidly became severe, but he pushed himself to find the hatch, straining against natures power to pull the barrier closed.

He collapsed upon the ground, panting from over exertion. Unwrapping the cloak from his face, he gulped in large amounts of precious oxygen, his dizziness from the lack of air flow subsiding.

Kylo sat there in the dark for what seemed like hours, incensed over his own failure to not heed Mashra's warning.

He was in no hurry to go back into the main hull, for the situation would become all too real, and he might not be able to control himself from destroying all of the girl's possessions. The constant vibration coming from the walls was the only companion he had. But his back started to ache, rear going numb. Finally, he ignited his saber and made himself get up to walk deeper inside the AT-AT.

The inside was painted in the wanton color of his saber as he made his way to the shelves in front of the tunnel. He activated one of the light orbs and let it float to the middle of the room. Its glow was dim, but better than staying in complete darkness. Hopefully it would last the duration of his stay.

Kylo licked his lips, noticing how dry his mouth had become. All his provisions were on the ship. If he didn't find some water soon, he would be forced to trek out into the sand storm.

A small tug pulled at the center of his chest, willing him to follow it to the far left wall. When he arrived, he knelt down and inspected four rusted screws, holding a small square section of a panel closed. He waved his hand, watching as the screws and metal enclosure fell to the ground. The widening of his eyes was proof to what he felt: shock.

Inside the wall were dozens of ration packets and large metal caskets. His hands immediately shot out to one of the barrels, recognizing the familiar sloshing sound of water as he pulled it close to him.

The top flew across the room and he dipped his hands inside, cupping the water up to his parched mouth. There was a hint of a chemical taste to it, but he didn't care. He could now wait out the storm with all these supplies, the idea of trying to find the ship becoming a thing of the past.

Once his stomach became hard and full, he sat back onto his heels, panting for air.

Now what to do.

The sheer boredom of being stuck in there for half a day quickly became overwhelming. He went through his usual calisthenics, having to modify certain aspects of it to fit within the confining space. After a few hours of intense exercise and stripping down to nothing but his pants and boots, he tried meditation – something he'd never been particularly good at since he struggled with centering himself.

So that didn't last long.

Giving up, he found himself involuntarily counting the tick marks on the wall, losing count somewhere after six hundred and fifty.

One of the more entertaining parts of the confinement was going through the scavenger's things. He was particularly interested in the rebel helmet and the name written on the outside.

Captain Dosmit Raeh of the Tierfon Yellow Aces.

He found it to be an unlikely coincidence that the captain's surname was the scavenger's name. Even though she spelled it differently, they sounded exactly the same. Maybe Rey isn't her real name…

But he'd seen it in her mind, and she believed the name to be hers. He decided to shelf that particular mystery for the time being as he made his way over to the workbench in the corner

She didn't have many personal belongings, but she had a ton of technical hardware. Kylo sat down, straddling the bench as he studied the slim screen display on top of a big, metal box. Wires came out of the sides and snaked their way along the ground, disappearing behind the wall next to him. A flight controller joystick sat off to the side, also connected to the box by intricate wiring. As he eyed the anatomy of the hardware ahead of him, he realized what he was looking at: a roughly put together computer.

The girl made her own computer? Why would a scavenger need a computer?

Earlier, when he had glanced over at this corner, he had passed the computer off as being a pile of junk.

Finding the power switch, he flicked it on, the screen lighting up to show the last thing Kylo expected to see: a flight simulation. There was a picture of an asteroid field with the words "START" flashing in the middle, with various holograms of switches and flight controls surrounding him. Ren looked around in awe, feeling impressed with the young scavenger. Her flight simulation was legit, not an amateurish attempt to just pass time.

This kind of equipment was used for people who wanted to become military grade pilots.

He stretched his arms, cracking his knuckles in anticipation. The idea of being able to play the same simulation as the girl excited Ren more than he cared to admit. He couldn't resist grasping onto the joystick, allowing the mockup flight to start.

Almost immediately, his ship came under fire as he realized he was piloting an A-wing.

Of course.

A Tie fighter was closing in on him, so he made the gut decision to drop close to the surface of the nearest asteroid. The high mountain ranges cast long shadows over the rocky terrain as he flew past numerous dark caves. His sensors were being interrupted from the heavy metal ores all around the ship, but he at least momentarily lost the Tie among all the sharp turns and stony hills.

His mind raced to come up with a plan, but was interrupted by canon fire coming from behind. He griped the flight stick harder, feeling his grasp threatening to slip as his adrenaline spiked, making his hands sweat. Large chunks of rock dislodged from the blasts, causing him to weave in and out to avoid impact. A cave came into view, and he waited till the last second to fire his thrusters to the max and dive inside, hoping the Tie would overshoot the entrance.

It did.

However, entering a cave was not the smartest move. The cavern could end at any moment or be too small to maneuver through, but Ren kept flying inside. He knew the Tie was still trying to follow him; he just had a bigger lead this time.

If the sensors were having trouble with the mountains, the cave was infinitely worse. They were completely useless, leaving him to solely rely upon what he could see and feel. But if he was having problems, so was the Tie fighter. Fortunately, he didn't need sensors to know that the cave was becoming narrower, and he could hear the echoes of the Tie's engines bounce off the rocky walls.

He knew he had to backtrack, and fast.

His next idea was absolutely insane, but he saw no other way around it. He eased off of the thrusters and dropped to the cave floor. The ship was as close to the ground as he could get it without crashing, and he could feel the vibrations through the joystick.

Now, he waited. He could hear the Tie closing in as his hand twitched in anticipation. Finally, the fighter flew out behind him as Kylo initiated his reverse thrusters. This action seemed to take the Tie completely by surprise since the enemy's internal targeting was entirely off.

The bottom of the Tie fighter grazed against the A-wing's cockpit, passing overhead and speeding out of control. The Tie didn't have enough space to stop and went crashing into the narrow cave walls, sparks flying as it exploded.

"Yes!" Kylo celebrated, his arms shooting into the air as he was overcome with victory.

"Who's there?" a startled voice said.

Kylo jumped from the bench so rapidly, he knocked the computer off its perch. As it came crashing down, he grabbed for his lightsaber, igniting it, facing the empty room in a battle stance. He didn't like being caught off guard, which seemed to be happening more and more as of late.

But no one was there.

Breathing heavily, his eyes roamed over every surface, glared at every crevice. The hair on his chest and arms stood upright as his body shuddered from the cool air whispering over his bare skin. The only noise inside the AT-AT was that of the outside storm, but he had heard that voice as clear as day.

It was her voice.

The scavenger.

Logically, it was impossible for her to be there. No sane person would travel during a storm like this, and the scavenger did not strike him as being outright reckless. Impulsive, yes. Irresponsible in the face of this typhoon?

Unlikely.

He disabled the saber, clipping it onto his trousers as he concluded that he was alone.

Not from him, but from the girl. Pacing up and down the cramped quarters, Kylo's discomfort continued to worsen. The only voice he's ever heard inside his mind had been Leader Snoke, and even then, it never came across that clearly. His master preferred to speak to him through feelings and emotions, only using speech when he wanted to be clear. Communicating this way was now rarely used since Kylo could now talk to his master through holograms or a comms channel.

But he never sounded like he was in the same room as me, Kylo thought. The girl's voice literally sounded like she was standing right next to him, talking directly into his ear. And when he heard her voice, he had felt fear. Her fear.

Kylo never put much thought into telepathy. He'd read stories, some myths of communicating this way, but it usually required a connection of a certain kind.

He stopped pacing.

Looked to the mangled computer on the floor as his heart hammered against his chest, his ears filling with the rush of blood.

"No," he breathed out.

The realization of what he was proposing as an explanation made him sit back on the bench before his knees buckled.

A connection…

...through the Force.

He'd learned about those long ago during his Jedi studies, finding that they usually manifested between a master and apprentice. With Snoke, the link they had was kept superficial on purpose. Kylo always knew Supreme Leader did not want to be tied to his apprentice, nor did he desire to share feelings and thoughts with him. So trying to compare that connection with the one he possibly shared with the girl was useless.

He started to list all the signs of a Force bond that he could remember. Feeling each others emotions, having similar fighting styles, communicating across vast distances, drawing strength from one another…

His hands rested on his knees as his stare concentrated on the floor. A bond would explain the dream sharing and hearing her speak so clearly in his mind, but part of him was still denying it was possible. He would've known the moment something like that had formed between them.

Wouldn't he?

He glanced behind him at the computer. Long before joining the First Order, he would practice flying on many different flight simulators. What all the programs had in common was that they automatically saved all the simulations to the hard drive, allowing you to replay them later. At the very least, the hard drive should have saved the girls most recent flights.

Kylo rotated his body toward the scattered computer parts, swiftly working to put everything back together. He was able to open the metal case and poke around the inside to make sure nothing was damaged. All the wiring seemed to still be intact, which was what he had worried about the most. He could tell parts of the motherboard had been damaged at one point, but the scavenger had crimped and melded certain parts back on, even going as far as creating her own pieces to make the thing functional.

After inspecting the rest of the wiring, he closed the box and turned on the power supply. He opened the memory files and found what he was looking for near the top. It was the same simulation he'd flown, having been done a couple weeks ago. He scooted closer to the screen and promptly opened the video. The graphics came to life as he studied every detail of the flight. Gradually his spine straightened, eyes going wide, not wanting to blink in case he missed anything.

She was doing everything exactly the same as he had done.

The A-wing flew between the mountains, dove into a cave, waited at the cave floor, and initiated the reverse thrusters to startle the Tie. After the Tie exploded against the cavern wall, the sequence ended, the main menu appearing on screen.

Kylo's face was mere inches from the projection.

It was no coincidence him and the girl had performed almost the exact same way.

A long, shaky breath escaped his tight lips as he brushed his hair back. One other sign of a Force bond was making similar decisions to the point where neither one knew who was actually in control. But that characteristic should take years to develop. So how was he already showing signs of it after just meeting the girl a week ago?

Answer to that aside, this was going to put an immense obstacle in his plans. The only way to get rid of such a connection was death, and that was exactly what he had planned for her.

Problem was, he knew what would happen to person who was left alive on the other side of the bond. They were never the same as they spent the rest of their lives searching for that lost piece of their soul that had died with their partner. It eventually drove the person to insanity and, in some cases, to take their own life.

Kylo's body shivered.

The only thing that was saving him from panicking was that knowing with those extreme cases, the ones involved had allowed the bond to consume them and had let the connection strengthen till it was rooted deep within their souls.

He needed to find and kill that garbage collector before the bond overwhelmed him. It was unfortunate he couldn't use the bond to find her since he didn't want the tether between them to tighten.

He let his back slowly lower onto the oblong workbench, placing his hands behind his head to offer a cushion. The hazy light cast the deep shadows from the columns onto the ceiling, his eyes gliding between the contrast of hues.

Kylo couldn't believe this was happening at this point in his life. Maybe when he was a teenager, something like this wouldn't have been as dreadful. He'd wanted a connection with someone else, had wanted to be understood. Prayed for it desperately.

Now he was just bitter to finally have one.

Everything always has to happen at the most inopportune time.

()()()()()

Legs crossed, Rey sat on the soft dirt, the slumbering surroundings softly illuminated by the dim rays of moonlight. It had to be close to midnight or even some time passed that. Luke had left a couple hours ago for bed, but Rey insisted on staying up and Force moving the different sized rocks placed out before her. It was evident her body was hitting the peak of exhaustion as her vision was becoming blurred and a headache was starting to pulse behind her eyes.

Rey darted to her feet as Chewie suddenly spoke from behind. "Raaaaaargh aaagh raagh. Aaaaagh raaargh."

Clutching at her chest, she willed her thundering heart to calm. "Yeah, I knew it was late, but I didn't know it was that late. I'll come to bed, okay? No need to start a lecture." She warily made her way to him, watching as he turned away, motioning for her to climb onto his back.

"Oh no." She stopped and shook her head. "I don't want to weigh you down. Those stairs can be brutal." Chewie instantly countered her, saying how she'd only taken a few steps and was already wobbling. Her legs did feel like they would give out at any moment, and she was absolutely dreading walking down the island's decline.

That was another reason she'd stayed out so late – she'd been trying to push back the inevitable.

If she wasn't so exhausted, she would've kept refusing Chewie's offer. But after accepting how spent she was, she couldn't. "Okay. If you so graciously insist." Her elation of getting out of descending those steps was evident by the huge grin on her face. The Wookie bent down and grabbed Rey's legs as he stood to his full height.

Chewie made a big show of swaying back and forth, pretending he couldn't hold onto her.

Rey grasped the furry shoulders, laughing into the night. "I don't weight that much!" she declared, but not at all offended. She knew it was all in good fun.

Chewie chuckled and started to walk normally as they moved down the wide stairway. As the laughter floated away, Rey was reminded of what happened earlier at dinner. She knew she needed to say something, but didn't know how to start apologizing. Her head rested on his shoulder as she overlooked the glistening water, trying to draw on the strength she knew she had.

"I'm sorry, Chewie. About what happened earlier at dinner," she whispered. Chewie glanced at her from the corner of his eye, but didn't stop walking. He looked back ahead as she hoped he would say something in response.

After a few moments, he explained that he wasn't mad at her. It was just hard to listen to stories about Ben after what he had done. Chewie had always treated Ben as family while he'd been growing up, which was why it hurt every time he was reminded of the old and lost Ben Solo. But he didn't blame her for being curious about him.

Asking questions about him was fine; he was just caught off guard at dinner.

"I understand. I'll be more mindful in the future," she murmured as her and Chewie saw the soft glow of the Falcon below. Rey closed her eyes for the rest of the journey, dozing off, only to be woken from being placed on her bed. Chewie bade her good night and left her to rest. She nestled further into the blankets, rubbing her head against the pillow, arranging herself so she was comfortable. Breathing slowly, she was languidly being drawn back down into that place of relaxation and–

Her eyes popped open.

A sudden spike in adrenaline rammed her fully awake. She sat up, looking around her bare room, sensing her feelings were not her own.

Then, a voice. "Yes!"

She leaped off the bed in a flurry of blankets, untangling her thrashing limbs and swirling around, searching.

"Who's there?" she called out.

No answer.

Obviously, nobody was in the room with her. There were zero places for someone to hide in there. There wasn't even enough of a gap below the bed to accommodate a child.

But she'd heard the voice of a man so clearly.

It was him.

Teetering, she plopped herself down onto the edge of the bed before she collapsed.

His voice had boomed with elation, an emotion she didn't know he was capable of showing. But the experience went beyond what ears could hear; she could feel his joy as if it were her own. Felt that he was close, like she could reach out and touch him.

I need sleep.

She threw herself under her blankets, going through the same process as before. The decision to bypass getting clean before bed was probably going to bug her in the morning, but she didn't care in the moment. With her mind she turned off the lights, focusing on finding tranquility. But her thoughts were racing, making it take longer than necessary to slumber.

Rey needed to see him, to talk with him again.

She needed to know that he was worth trying to save, even if everyone else had given up on him.

To an extent, she didn't deny that part of herself thought this was a lost cause and a waste of time. The memory of him killing his father was still at the forefront of her daily thoughts. But ever since that dream, she'd been trying to dissect what she'd bared witness to: the pain she'd seen on Ben's face, the way he shifted back and forth in shock. And, she couldn't be sure since she wasn't directly nearby, but his cheeks seemed to gleam from shed tears.

That was a man who regretted his decisions.

Even if she wasn't fully committed to bringing Ben back to the light, she knew that no matter who he chose to be, she would never be able to kill him.

So really, him turning away from the darkness was the only option she had to save herself.

()()()()()

The warm wind stirred up the wispy sand as Rey shaded her eyes, peering across the wreckage of the Graveyard of Ships. To the west the sun was setting in a violet sea of light, casting its dying ambiance onto the mighty and barren desert. As she pivoted around to get her exact bearings, Kylo came into view off to her left, his statuesque face studying her.

He wasn't shocked to see her.

Neither was she.

He peeled his stare away, taking in his surroundings. A long exhale escaped from his lungs as he brought a hand up to comb through his hair. "I cannot escape this place," he muttered to himself.

Rey wasn't ecstatic about being back on Jakku, either.

His eyes found her again and they stared at each other, not knowing what to say. Abruptly, he turned on his heels and stalked away from her.

"Hey!" Rey yelled. "Where are you going?"

She ran after him as he turned around to face her, now walking backwards.

He lifted his arms out in exasperation. "I'm going to wait out this dream somewhere else. Preferably away from you." He turned back in the direction he'd been heading as she finally caught up with him and seized his upper arm, making him face her. His fury filled eyes were ablaze, but she refused to let go.

Trying to come up with something, anything to say, her mind went blank. How was she supposed to make him reveal his humanity? She inwardly scolded herself for not coming up with a starting point.

"What?" he demanded sharply through clasped teeth.

"I... want to talk," she implored, albeit a bit timidly. He slightly drew away from her, like she had a disease he didn't want to catch. Rey was pretty sure he thought she was a crazy person, but she didn't care. She needed to break the ice somehow, so she might as well be blunt with him. Besides, it wasn't like he was anywhere close to being sane.

People like him rarely were.

Kylo's eyes drifted to the firm grip on his upper right arm, the tension in his face melting away as he met her pleading expression. Slowly, and without leaving her gaze, he peeled her fingers from him gently, his calloused fingers rubbing against her skin as he held onto her for a moment longer than necessary.

She dropped her arm to the side as he let her go.

"I think you need a reminder that we are on opposite sides of a war. We have nothing to say to each other." His statement hung in the warm air as he returned to his quest of getting as far away from her as possible. Like she would give up that easily, though.

If she didn't have a stubborn mindset, she would have died on Jakku long ago.

Following him, Rey made sure to stay a few paces behind. Over time, his walk downgraded from brusque to being more leisurely, making it easier for her to follow. Her eyes never left his tall frame as she watched him study the numerous wrecked ships scattered before them. With the sun now gone, the moon shinned brightly, reflecting off the necropolis of metal, helping her to see every detail of his passive face. If it weren't for the brief glances in her direction, she would have believed he'd forgotten about her completely.

From the glimpses of his expression, he didn't seem to be annoyed with her – which was an improvement. But he would barely look at her at all. Instead, his stares were long and off into the distance, the way he would tinker with random pieces of equipment making it seem like he was lost in his own thoughts.

If I could only get a glimpse of what he was thinking…

Kylo kept walking and she kept following, like they were in a dance both had started to memorize.

With her frustration rising, Rey was about to burst as the reality of not achieving her goal started to grow more apparent. All she wanted was a peek of that man she'd seen at the end of their previously shared dream, and he was not going to show him to her. She felt like yelling at him again, but Rey was certain he would just find that amusing.

"You're not going to stop following me, are you?"

Her attention snapped to where he stood, finding his deep gaze to be almost intrusive. The urge to cover her body with her hands was overwhelming, but she remained still. It was like he could see right into her, knowing her intentions toward him without even questioning her. But she couldn't dwell on that now. Her second chance was staring her right in the face and she needed to take it.

"No. All I'm asking for is a few moments of your time, which I would say you have plenty of in this place."

"Unless I suddenly wake up. Or you do."

But Rey somehow knew that the time she needed would be given to her. Neither of them were waking up soon. She crossed her arms and tried to stand her ground against his bombarding stare. It made her tremble. The corner of his mouth twisted up slightly – probably out of amusement – as he mimicked her stance.

"Fine. You want us to talk. You can get the conversation started," he ordered.

Yeah. No pressure, she thought smugly.

Hands resting on her hips, she glanced up at the star painted sky, praying to miraculously think of the right question to ask. There were so many things she wanted to know and time was not infinite here.

"You didn't want to go to your uncle's academy when you were younger." This was more of a statement than an actual question. She waited for him to give her some sort of reply.

"No. I did not want to go, but I was forced to."

"Because of what happened with that boy your age?" His eyes scrutinized her as he gradually nodded. She was growing increasingly nervous from realizing she was actually going to have a conversation with this man. All they had ever done was fight, yell, or ignore one another. But here, right at this very instant, he was giving her his full attention.

Palms starting to sweat and skin beginning to prickle, she tried to hide her nerves from Kylo's very observant eyes.

"When you were younger, what did you want to be?" she asked. He looked at her like she'd just gone insane, which she didn't blame him. The question sounded weird as it came out of her mouth, but she had to try and make him think of his life as Ben Solo.

"Next question." He waved his hand off to the side like he was physically trying to swat away her query.

"You aren't even going to try to answer?"

"No," he immediately responded.

"You're horrible at conversing with people."

His brow arched and he pointed directly at her lean frame. "You're the one who wanted to talk. So you can either ask me something that doesn't sound absurd, or I can go back to ignoring you." The words were laced with impatience.

"Asking about your childhood isn't absurd."

"It is because it doesn't matter. It's a complete waste of time to dwell on the past."

She stared at him incredulously, amazed at how unimportant he seemed to find his past life. "No, it's not. You had a family who loved you. Your past will always be a part of you even if you try to bury it."

A deep, sinister scowl spread across his face and Rey thought he was going to lung at her. Instead, his balled up hands remained at his sides.

"You understand nothing." He stalked slowly towards her while his eyes burned into her soul, gluing her in place. "You know nothing of family. Yours dumped you on this Force forsaken place and left you to rot." She backed up, trying to keep a good distance, but her back hit the outer wall of a ship, denying her safety.

Her heart rate skyrocketed. "They would've came back for me, except–"

"Except what?" he challenged, getting closer to her. "Do you know what happened to them? Why they never came back for you?" Her lips pursed together. "No, you have no idea why your family threw you away. But I know why mine did."

Rey wiped at her eyes, not caring that she had let a few tears escape down her cheeks. "Yours never left you on a desert planet," she countered. "They kept you with them, because they cared about you."

"Cared about me?" He pointed to his chest. "Do you even know the last time I had seen or talked to my father before that day on Starkiller?" He paused, waiting for her to reply. Tears still stung her eyes as he talked so openly about the day he killed Han.

"DO YOU?!" His sudden outburst startled her, and she looked away from him. Back against the wall, she was stuck as he stalked forward. "I was fifteen years old. He thought I was a freak and tossed me aside like I was a disgrace. He never tried to contact me. Not. Once." His temper started to simmer, being replaced with a sound of despair. Rey looked up at him, eyes wide with shock. The man didn't seem to notice the moisture now streaming down his face, dripping off his narrow chin.

He paced as he ran his hands through his hair, his eyes darting frantically.

"And my mother..." Kylo chuckled, containing no traces of joy. "She let him walk away from me. But then again, her maternal instincts were lacking since the day I was born."

In her mind, she'd always pictured Han and Leia as being these perfect, attentive parents who doted on their son. It was that was she would've wanted for herself. But the more she learned, the more that picture was being torn apart.

Ren was a complete mess as he kept up with the walking routine. Pain seemed to lace his face, his Adams apple bobbing from trying to hold back what she assumed were sobs. Somehow, he seemed so small, like a little boy.

Maybe that's what he's always been.

"Why did you join the First Order?" she asked.

He stopped, angling his face away from her, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

"You wouldn't–"

"Don't tell me I wouldn't understand." Her back left the cool metal, ambling in his direction. She came into his line of sight, mustering all the courage she had to push him into talking more. "Help me understand. Tell me what happened. Forget that we fight on different sides and just talk to me. Please."

He took a hesitant step away, a deep frown forming across his pale face. "You would actually forget your allegiance to the Resistance... to listen to me?"

"Yes."

()()()()()

As the girl approached him, Ren took an involuntarily step back. The whole encounter was taking a strange turn. Not to mention the constant bombardment of her emotions on his being was something uncomfortably familiar. He could tell that the bond between them was growing stronger – it was becoming more difficult to block her out.

Oddly enough, their time together started off with her wanting to talk with him. When he shot down that idea, she'd settled on following him till he cracked from unbridled curiosity. He'd let his emotions break his controlled demeanor, and realized he had tears leaking out of his eyes.

He inwardly scolded himself for talking about his family. The dream was already affecting how he acted around her, for he never would have started to cry in front of this girl... this trash collector.

The girl's proposition had taken him aback. He found it hard to believe she would try to understand the necessity of the First Order in the galaxy, her small-minded morals getting in the way. "You would actually forget about your allegiance to the Resistance to listen to me?"

"Yes," she replied without hesitation. "I want to understand why you left everything to join them." Her voice was unwavering, her stare focused.

For the first time since they arrived in this delusional realm, Ren looked at her. Really looked at her.

Her skin glowed under the soft, silvery waves of the moon, making her appear ethereal. Mystical. Her attire was her usual desert rags, but her whole visage deserved to be in something more regal.

That face, though.

The bone structure was a perfect combination of femininity and power. The small nose, round face, and plump lips all evenly vying for his attention, the only feature to actually grab it fully being her eyes.

Her emotions were not easily hidden behind that confident, yet innocent face. Years of pain were evident in the crease of her brow, in the down-curve of her mouth. But her eyes, her eyes showed him her soul. They held a deep pool of restless goals, and an ocean of endless grief. As he gazed into those eyes he knew, all the splendor that was threaded throughout the galaxy would never be able to compete with what she held:

Passion.

After living such a wasteful life, the emotion was no doubt new to her, but she wore it with no intention of ever snuffing it out. It turned her eyes into scorching orbs, allowing him to read clearly that this woman would fight to her very last breath to have the life she now desired. The galaxy would never break her. Sure, she would cry and yell and claw at whatever stood in her way, but her spirit would never be taken.

She clung to that power with passion.

Passion that made her beautiful. Desirable.

There was that static again, that crackling in the air that happened when one got too close to the other. At first, it made the small hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. But now, it was enough that he feared for his life. Like if they somehow touched again, the act would swallow him whole and kill him.

And he wanted it, wanted her, in the ways a man wanted a woman.

Heat swelled through out his body, coalescing to one area in particular.

He darted to his right and rounded the corner of the downed ship, needing to hide. Quickly, he dipped his hand below his black trousers and adjusted himself before she found him.

He'd always prided himself in not getting distracted by the appeal of a woman, but in this moment, he couldn't stop his attraction toward the scavenger. Even though he'd never been with a woman, he was still very much a man. Those feelings have always been there, but he's always been strong enough to resist such passions.

"Are you okay?" The sound of her soft footsteps came to his ears. He turned to face her approaching form. It tore at his rough exterior to hear her sound so genuinely concerned for him.

He dove right into the philosophy of the Order, trying to gain control of his faculties."The First Order is necessary in bringing peace and progression to the galaxy." The scavenger stopped, patiently listening to the enlightening lesson. "The chaos that arose after The Empire fell didn't disappear after the New Republic took control. They were more useless than helpful. Criminal enterprises were gaining more power, slaves were becoming more prevalent, and the galactic economy was crumbling from debt and inflation."

The girl's eyebrows scrunched together. "So you don't believe people should govern themselves?"

"No. All planets should be under the same rule, not have their individual leaders making up a Senate. The only thing a Senate can do is argue long enough till one of them eventually dies." The girl nodded thoughtfully as she rubbed her hands slowly together. "The galaxy needs one person making the decisions so progress can actually be attained, not stifled."

"Have you always believed this way? Even while growing up?" she asked. He was always hesitant about answering questions about his past, but this one didn't appear to be too invasive.

He'd already got caught up in his own anguish over his parents in front of her. So, really, how much worse could it get?

"I have, yes. I saw first hand the ineptitude of the Senate and how it allowed the galaxy's perversions to run rampant." He rolled up his sleeves to help himself cool down. Talking about the galaxy helped take his mind off the girl, but his body had not caught up with his brain.

Kylo was still hot and tingly from his previous weak thoughts.

"What did you see that made you turn away from the New Republic?"

So far, he'd been impressed that the girl had not started to argue with him, but was instead eagerly listening to his opinions. Never in his life had someone showed such fervor in understanding him. It felt… nice. The girl was easier to converse with than he thought she would be, and he found himself growing comfortable in her presence.

Nonetheless, he didn't want to answer the question she just posed, but he didn't want to lie either.

"I… don't wish to answer that." His voice was gentle as he glanced down at the sand around his boots.

"It was horrible? What you saw?"

He nodded

Reluctantly, he thought back to that tumultuous day in the caves. His lungs took in a strained breath, glancing to the young girl standing not far from him. He didn't like the way she stared at him with pity, like he was some kind of injured animal to coddle back to health.

Annoyance took hold as he wanted her compassionate stare to drift away with the temperate breeze.

"You really want to know what happened?" he inquired of her.

"Well… I..." she stuttered. "If it's too painful–" His dark glare stopped her from speaking further, the empathy disappearing slowly from her face.

It's just words, he reminded himself. Maybe if she knows, she'll see how much the galaxy desperately needs to be fixed.

His hands ran through his hair while he took in the stars scattered amongst the obscurity of space. To speak this story would be to talk about his old life as Ben Solo in great detail. But just this once, he felt it was important to make an exception.