Thank you all soooooo much for every follow, fave, and review! You all are so awesome and thanks for taking the time to read my story! HogwartsIsOurHome: I'm glad you are liking the slow progression of their relationship. I do think there is more of a satisfying feeling when reading slow-burns and then finally seeing the couple get together. The build up is rewarding in the end! They also do share a moment in this chapter, so keep those hairs on your head! Jedi Kay-Kenobi: I knew when I was outlining the story that it was going to be maddening for a lot of readers, but also be enjoyable at the same time. All I can say is patience! You will be rewarded! I also really had to think about these two characters before I starting writing. How would they interact with one another? What would they say? It is still a hard thing to do, but I enjoy it. I am so glad you noticed how Ben didn't like living up to others expectations, but he is doing the exact same thing with Snoke and Vader. I was wondering if anyone would see that parallel and you did! Shout out to all the TVD fans! Yeah! MaelsiC: Those are some great adjectives! Haha I was laughing while reading your comment. Thanks for all the lovely compliments and I hope the story meets your expectations. Glad to have a fan from Mexico! Guest: I couldn't resist adding Carise to the story. She adds a lot of drama to Leia's life! ilovekyloren: I wanted this to feel close to a novel in the sense that it has a general plot line with smaller plot points going on around it. Its not just the love story, but the fight against the First Order for the control over the galaxy. We just haven't made it to all the politics yet. I'm happy you get lost in the story! Kimmycocopop: It was important to have them interact in their dreams so the conflict was much more powerful once they faced each other on the island. Ren is not a super great person right now, so your struggle to like him is understandable. Poe definitely brings more perspective to the group, especially in upcoming chapters. Glad you like his character so far!
I do not own Star Wars
Chapter 17
Kylo Ren stalked down the dark passage as the knights veered off down an adjacent hallway. The students were in a peaceful state of sleep, unaware of the imminent danger dressed in black. Kylo's thoughts were threatening to relive the years he trained at the school, but he tore the memories apart before they gained any traction.
That life was not a part of him anymore.
He came upon the first room, the one that held the oldest student at the academy. This was who would be his most formidable opponent, but Kylo knew he was still stronger in the Force than Alec.
No. Don't use names.
The man stirred awake, noticing the vast amount of darkness emanating from outside his chambers. With a swift mental command, the door slid open, revealing the man scrambling for his lightsaber. He stood, facing Kylo with his yellow plasma blade. Horror cut through the atmosphere as the Jedi took in the threatening figure in the doorway.
The Jedi charged, bringing the blade down at Kylo's mask. Kylo sidestepped the blow, stepping further into the tight confines of the living quarters. The man swung the weapon, but Kylo ignited his saber to parry the Jedi's attack. Their blades scorched the walls and slashed through the furniture as they fought viciously. Kylo knew this student had a particular gift with saber combat, but he was relatively weak when it came to using the Force.
Kylo plunged into the Jedi's mind, searching and finding that little crevice that tucked away a person's deepest fear. He brought the terror to the surface, hoping that the mental trick would work on the man. Kylo had practiced this technique only a few times before, but it hadn't been during a physical altercation. He was curious to see if he could do it under more stressful circumstances. From the way the Jedi fell to the floor and clawed at his body, Kylo concluded it to be a success.
The man believed himself to be on fire and was trying to stop the pain of his burning flesh.
Kylo stretched out his hand, calling the Jedi's lightsaber to him. His mind grew fuzzy as he felt something familiar upon touching the weapon. It was almost like he was on the verge of seeing a picture in his thoughts, but he quickly dismissed it.
Deep groans were coming from the ground. Kylo's attention was drawn back to the dazed man. With both lightsabers disengaged, he crouched next to the Jedi, getting ready to force the man into a deep sleep before killing him.
"Don't," the man breathed out. Pleading for his life was a waste of time since Kylo was fully committed to his plan. "You have to hide her from him. Don't let him find her." The man was clearly delirious, but the statements still struck Kylo as being odd. "Don't do it. You kill her and you can never come back."
Enough of this, Kylo thought.
With a wave of his hand, Kylo caused the man to slumber, stopping the unusual tirade from going on a moment longer. He tried to make sense of the Jedi's words, concluding that he was begging Kylo not to kill one of the female padawans.
That was the logical explanation, anyway.
Before there was time to question himself, he felt for the Jedi's spinal column through the Force and crushed that sweet spot right in the neck. The death was quick and precise, like how it should be. His adrenaline spiked as he looked upon the dead body. The power Kylo had possessed over him was a prize to behold. He held all the control over the fate of this one person and marveled at the rush of invincibility that had enveloped him. He could get used to such a feeling with more practice….
In a blink of an eye, the body on the floor changed into that of a young woman. Her brown hair was strewed out around her head, her eyes lifelessly looking off into the distance. The woman's identity dawned on him. Kylo sucked in a sharp breath of disbelief. He frantically backed up into the wall, not wanting to believe what he was seeing.
Screams started to resonate through the vast building and he could hear the panic of footfalls on the floor.
She's not supposed to be here! I killed Alec, not her! This doesn't-
Ren woke in the midst of blackness, not knowing where he was. The light illuminated the room on his command, showing him that he was still on his ship. A drop of sweat trickled down his temple and into his hair as his hands rubbed the anxiety from his face.
He hadn't dreamt of that night at the academy in a very long time. Years, even. But every detail had matched his memory, all the way up until Rey appeared dead, causing him to scurry away from her corpse. That hadn't actually happened.
Ren rose from the bottom bunk, grasping onto his lightsaber, feeling a powerful need to get out of the metal boundaries of the freighter. He slipped on his boots and stopped by the refresher before walking down to the cargo bay.
The sky was overcast and the air was thicker than before, making it difficult for him to breathe and fill his lungs properly. He much preferred colder climates compared to the drowning pressure of heat found in tropical or desert planets. The humidity was already compacting the heat against his skin and he wished for a helpful breeze to cool him off, but none came. It was going to be another torturous day outside, especially if Rey still wanted to duel.
Off to his left, distant sounds of laughter came from the beach. He reached out to Rey, sensing she was somewhere on the coastline. He pushed the vines and branches from his path, allowing him a clear view of the ocean. His eyesight was drawn to movement off to the side where he saw Rey and Poe facing one another. She was wearing the same trousers from yesterday, but they were now paired with the white shirt he had given her last night. The pilot was shirtless, which didn't seem to surprise Ren in the slightest. Both were in a battle stance, their arms raised in a defensive manner.
Ren remained by the trees, observing the bout that was about to unfold. He was curious to see Rey's fighting style sans lightsaber... and if the pilot would be a formidable opponent.
Rey's fist shot out to strike Poe's midsection, but the pilot swatted her hand away and pivoted to the right. His arm swung at her back, missing it by mere inches as she bent forward to grab his leg. She pulled him to her, causing him to lose his balance and fall hard onto the ground. Rey jumped when his legs swept at her ankles, giving the pilot the momentum to stand quickly, but she proved to be faster. She darted at Poe, sliding her knees across the sand as she ducked under his swing and hit him square in the stomach. The pilot let out a low grunt and both of them paused to catch their breath.
Poe helped her onto her feet as they laughed and talked.
Ren let his presence be known as he made his way over to them. Poe was the first to see him, immediately backing away from Rey and looking nervous. "That was a good match," Ren admonished. Rey turned to him, her grin brightening her eyes. The girl was obviously proud of herself. "What decides the winning point?"
"The first person to touch the torso wins a point." Rey lifted the top of her shirt to wipe her brow. Ren noticed that he could see her chest wrap through the light fabric. I should have given her the black one. "That includes the back."
Ren nodded. "What's the score?"
"Rey just took the lead three to two." Poe squinted at the young girl. Ren slightly smiled in admiration. "She's shiftier than she looks." Rey shrugged, deciding to take the statement as a compliment.
Poe turned his attention to Ren, not hiding the fact that he was eyeing him up and down. "So, Kylo, you wanna try your hand at it?" Ren stared at the pilot, trying to process what the man had just asked. Poe laughed at his reaction and Rey looked between the two men anxiously. "It's okay. I understand you probably don't like to lose."
Ren gave the man a flat stare. "I don't lose."
"Really? That scar across your face tells a different story." A self-satisfied smirk formed on Poe's features, causing Ren's blood to boil.
Poe unzipped his trousers, letting them fall to the sand, leaving him in only his undergarment briefs. "I'm gonna go for a swim to cool down." A devilish grin formed on his lips and he winked at Rey before running out to the waves.
Ren and Rey watched, equally astounded at Poe's lack of propriety. Ren glanced at Rey, seeing the blush on her cheeks as Poe dove into the water. This was probably the first time Rey had ever seen so much of a man exposed, and Ren didn't like that it had been the pilot.
That guy is way too comfortable in his own skin.
After the pilot went under the current, Rey's attention swept across the shimmering water, looking longingly at the soft waves. Ren could sense that she wished to go out into the ocean, but was too afraid since she didn't know how to swim.
She looked up at him, expectantly. "Time for some lightsaber dueling? And then maybe some mental exercises?"
Just as I thought, another day is going to be spent out in the heat, he mentally grumbled.
"If that's what you want, but we're not going to duel with lightsabers." Her face fell, her bottom lip jutting out in a pout. The expression made her seem so young and innocent... something Ren never was.
"I'm not fighting with sticks again," she protested.
"Again?"
Rey sighed dramatically, amusing Ren. "Master Skywalker and I only practiced with dueling staves. We were going to try out my new saberstaff, but we never got the chance because…" Ren knew what she was alluding to.
Hearing Skywalker's name irked him, but he pushed it from his mind. It wasn't like she had brought up the name randomly. He had asked her a question and she answered honestly. Ren focused on the latter part of her statement and was surprised to find out she'd never used her saberstaff before their fight on the island. Her handling of it had been impressive, as if she'd been using the saber for years.
He motioned for them to start heading into the trees. She followed his lead. "Dueling canes are safer to use for practice," he explained. "Especially if you're going against an opponent you don't want to maim." He could almost hear her eyes roll as she walked beside him. "I'm not going to use my lightsaber against you, Rey."
She was becoming more and more frustrated. "If it's because it reminds you too much of fighting me on Starkiller or the island–"
"It's not. You can get seriously injured while practicing and I'm not taking that risk."
Maybe he was a little timid to duel her with his saber because of the memories, but what he had in mind for practicing didn't really involve a lot of dueling. It would be more form based exercises and agility training. He was sure Rey was going to hate it.
"Do you even have dueling canes?" Rey eyed him skeptically.
"No, but there are plenty of branches lying around. I'm sure we can fashion two into a dueling saber and staff." They went through the trees, but Ren refrained from helping her through this time. He should refrain from touching her. "Or I can make yours for you, if you feel too incapable."
Rey spun around to face him, looking all too serious about the challenge he passively gave her. "I'm more than capable of figuring it out. I did make my quarterstaff on my own. I'm sure I can handle a stick."
"I'm sure you can."
"I can."
"Okay."
"Okay." His smile finally broke through.
Rey narrowed her eyes at him. "Were you trying to get a rise out of me?"
Ren's lips stretched further across his cheeks. "I couldn't help it when you made it so easy."
Rey scoffed and shook her head, but he could tell by the way her shoulders relaxed and how her eyes softened that she wasn't mad at him. Thank the stars. Ren was out of his depth when it came to teasing... or flirting. Which he shouldn't be doing with her. But he couldn't help it.
They searched through the vegetation for their perfect weapons, keeping the conversation light. She relayed the start of her day, telling him how her and Poe woke around the same time and had breakfast together. The pilot offered to teach her some hand-to-hand combat after she expressed how she was hoping to duel with her lightsaber. Once Poe realized how gifted Rey was at fighting, they decided to make it interesting by making it into an actual game.
"But he never hit you too hard, right?" Ren inquired. The memory of striking her across the face on the island came to his mind, but he buried it back within his endless pit of shame.
"No, he would barely tap me. I told him he could strike me harder and I'd be fine, but he never did."
Good, Ren thought. He knew Rey would've been able to handle the hits, but if the pilot had been rough with her, he would have taken it personally. And for the most part while on the island, Ren had controlled his anger considerably well. He wondered how long he could keep that up.
He picked up a fairly straight branch, noting that the width was about the right size, but the length would need to be shortened. "So... has the pilot said to you whether he is staying or leaving soon?" Hopefully leaving. Ren didn't know how much longer he could handle the guy's sarcastic comments and brash personality.
"He wanted to stay a few days." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she eagerly searched the sandy ground. "To make sure that I'll be okay... and to give me time to change my mind," Rey stated nonchalantly. Ren clenched his teeth while focusing on the wooden staff in his hands.
"I found it!" Rey held the thin branch over her head in triumph, but he didn't share her enthusiasm. "What? This will work, right?"
She walked to him, holding the branch up so he could inspect it. It was thinner than his, but her hands were small, so it would work nicely for her grip. The length was the standard span of a saberstaff and the only thing that needed to be done to it was smooth out some notches. The girl had found the perfect practice weapon, so why was he suddenly in a bad mood?
The pilot seemed to believe that Rey was going to change her mind about staying, which made Ren's annoyance affect his demeanor. Even after Rey discovered all the cruel things he'd done, she was still here out of her own free will. How much more validation did he need that she wouldn't leave? Apparently a lot more, and it irked him that he needed that from her.
"Yes, it'll work." Could he sound anymore breathless? "You can use your lightsaber to smooth it out."
"Oh, uh… I don't have my lightsaber with me." If he'd been more observant, he would have known that.
"We can go back to the ship so you can get it, but you should get used to having it with you at all times." His tone was flat and she studied his down turned face. He swung the staff at his side as he started the trek back to the freighter.
Rey stayed close to his side. "Is what I said bothering you?"
"That you didn't bring your lightsaber?"
"No, I'm talking about how Poe is giving me time to change my mind." Ren kept his stare glued to the ship, not knowing if he should stay quiet or answer her honestly. There was a certain sense of vulnerability that came with confessing how one truly felt, which was a big reason why Ren didn't like to talk much.
However, the girl had earned some sense of honesty from him.
He cleared his throat to alleviate the discomfort at expressing his thoughts. "I guess I'm just... still waiting for you to really look at me and run away," he said quietly.
"I do really look at you, Ben." They stopped at the bottom of the ramp and his weight shifted between his two legs. He felt out of place discussing such a topic, even if it was with Rey. "Poe's wrong. After everything I've learned, I'm still here and I don't plan on leaving." He finally gave in and directed his eyesight onto her. Her skin was flush, her wavy hair sticking to the sweat on her neck, but it didn't take away from her natural beauty. If anything, it accentuated it. "I guess time will be the only thing that will prove that to you." Unexpectedly, she grasped his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze before darting up the ramp. It all happened so fast and he wished he could have held onto her longer. A few seconds of feeling her skin had been cruel, but he knew Rey hadn't purposefully tried to make it seem that way.
She scaled the ladder in record speed while yelling over her shoulder, "I'll grab my saber, and you can go find us an area to train in!" Her assertiveness was impressive, especially since it was directed at him.
He couldn't stop his smile as he thought about how much he liked that about her.
()()()()()
"I was expecting this to be more entertaining," Poe grumbled, head lazily resting on his hand. "Rey, I thought you said you were going to be dueling him?" Rey struck the tree with her smooth wooden quarterstaff, letting out an exasperated grunt.
Rey hadn't been enthusiastic once Ren explained to her what the training would entail. He would teach her some basic forms, call them out to her, and have her perform them against a stagnant opponent. Rey had complained that she wanted to be pushed harder and Ren had countered by telling her the exercises would test her endurance. Rey needed to learn not to falter in her foundation while feeling the pulls of exhaustion.
Three hours into the training and he could see her form start to weaken. To correct her, Ren would tap various parts of her body with his dueling cane so Rey could adjust accordingly. He would never do it hard, but he would put enough strength behind his strikes to irk her.
The pilot had been watching the promenade for the last hour, which was starting to aggravate Ren. The only thing Poe wanted to do was whine that he wasn't being entertained enough. "Building up muscle memory is an important step toward being able to duel efficiently," Ren explained to Poe while never taking his eyes off of Rey. Her back was starting to arch. He tapped her middle to correct her posture. She stared daggers into the tree out of frustration. Anger was boiling up to the surface as she struck the overly abused tree, making the branches shimmy up above.
"You're tapping into the dark side," he warned her. It was emanating off of her fiercely, and she was having a hard time controlling the fuming emotions.
Her wooden staff struck the ground and she turned to face him. "Well, you are making me angry." Aggression laced her words as she spoke between gritted teeth.
He pinched his eyes at her. "I'm making you do no such thing. You're the one who controls your emotions, and if you cannot control your anger, that's your own fault. If, however, you do want to use the dark side, I won't stop you. You can choose where your power comes from." He couldn't stop Rey from doing what she wanted, but he was surprised by what he was hoping she would do. The prospect of having her in the darkness with him had been so alluring before, but as he spends more time with her, tainting that light would be an atrocity.
There was a well of aggression and rage buried within her from the lonely life she'd succumbed to on Jakku. She was, however, skilled at never extracting from it. On Starkiller, she'd been very close to doing so, but she had closed it up and locked it away in her subconscious. Instead, she chose to use the death of Han Solo and her severely injured friend to fuel her power.
If she had used that pit of unmitigated emotions, though, Ren was sure she would not have hesitated to kill him.
Heavy breaths came from her mouth as she squared off at him. "I don't want to use the dark side. I just wanted to do some dueling today. This," she pointed at the tree, "seems like a waste of time."
Ren eyed the splintered bark. "You think this is a waste of time?"
Rey remained silent, waiting to see how Ren would react to her blunt comment. He advanced toward her suddenly, swinging his weapon right at Rey's midsection. He'd caught her off guard, evidenced by her wide eyes and slow defensive response. Poe was even caught by surprise, hurriedly standing on the ramp in alarm.
Even though it took a few seconds for Rey to realize what was happening, she regained her composure and was successfully fending off Ren's forward assault. He hit the girl's staff vigorously, making it hit the sand before Rey could stop it. Her arms were severely weakened, but fights were rarely ever fair.
Ren backed off the attack for a moment. "First person to hit the other wins. Anywhere on the body counts." The last statement was more for her benefit than his. He wouldn't attempt to strike her anywhere but on the stomach, and he wouldn't make the blow unnecessarily hard.
Rey enthusiastically took him up on the challenge and quickly regained the offensive lead. Ren was making it considerably hard for her to strike him and he could sense her giving into her anger too quickly. "You need to control your anger," he warned. But she didn't. She fed all her frustration and pent up annoyance into each and every thrust. It surprised him how fast she had submitted to her aggression, for he thought she would have fought to keep it at bay.
Pain blossomed in his jaw and he blinked to find himself suddenly on the ground. Metal and warmth glided along his taste buds. He spat out a wad of blood next to his hands.
The wooden quarterstaff dropped to the ground as Rey knelt next to him. "I-I didn't mean to do that." Her voice trembled, and Ren turned to see her face full of panic and regret. Poe ran up beside them, watching the scene unfold.
"The move you used to strike me"–his tongue slid over the inside of his cheek, feeling the open gash that was pouring blood into his mouth–"where did you learn it?" He let more of the crimson liquid drip onto the sand before looking intently at Rey.
At first, she gazed at him confused, but ever so slowly, realization dawned onto her face. "It's one of the forms I've been practicing with over the last few hours," she responded quietly.
"And you thought I was just wasting your time." Carefully, he stood to his full height. The vision in his left eye was blurred and the landscape around him started to spin out of focus. He must have been teetering to his left, because Rey was grasping firmly onto his arms to steady him. Closing his eyes, he took a few deep breaths and centered himself in the Force. The tissue and blood vessels in his cheek bound back together, the swelling coming down considerably.
Rey cleared her throat. "I would apologize, but I have a feeling you'd just stop me from doing so."
Keeping the majority of his concentration on healing the wound, he responded calmly behind his minute grin. "I was trying to push you into using the technique. I had to make my point somehow. Don't ever apologize for defending yourself." For the most part, Ren believed in what he just stated. When you're in a defensive position, any strike on your opponent was necessary for survival.
Guilt over it gave your enemy more power over you, which you should never allow.
However, the memory of Ren Force pushing Rey into a tree on Starkiller sped into his mind. No doubt the girl was going to fire her blaster at him, which forced him to defend himself, but he should've used less power on her. After everything that he'd just done, being gentle had been the last thing on his mind. But he had grown to regret how much of his strength he'd put behind that push. In the end, though, it had been wise to take her out of the equation, leaving the stormtrooper the one to fight. Rey had been the true threat, evidenced by the scars she left on his body. Pushing her had been a tactical decision as much as it was a defensive one, but that didn't change the context of what he did.
Feeling the last of the tissue heal, he opened his eyes to find Rey gaping at his now mended bruise. He knew what that look meant. She's definitely going to ask me to teach her that later.
Poe took a step forward. "You know, for a second there, I thought you went crazy and was trying to kill her all over again." Rey spun around, glaring at the pilot. For some odd reason, she took the comment more personally than Ren had. "Hey," Poe raised his hands innocently. "I think that's a reasonable thought after he suddenly lunges at you and has tried to kill you in the past."
Ren could sense Rey's anger heighten. He put his calloused hand on her shoulder to calm her.
What is going on with her?
He was the one that was always in the position of losing himself to his rage, but having Rey on the brink of becoming emotional, it had forced him to be the rational one. It was... odd.
"Lets go inside and cool off," he suggested. "I could use some water." He had deprived Rey of food and water while training, and now he was questioning that decision. Maybe she's dehydrated…
Rey stalked over to the ship, leaving Poe and Ren behind among the trees.
"What I said was meant to annoy you, not her," Poe admitted. Ren scrutinized Rey's shrinking form as she got closer to the freighter, trying to decipher her thoughts through their connection. He came up empty.
"Is she gonna be okay?" Poe asked. Ren's attention trailed back to the pilot, noticing his concern. Poe seemed to genuinely care for Rey's well-being, and Ren felt a pang of jealousy over never having someone feel that way about him. He knew Rey did, but their bond played a major role in them understanding one another.
Ren banished the childlike emotions and said, "She'll be fine. She just needs to eat something and relax for a while." Poe didn't seem to believe him completely, but he kept his mouth shut about the matter.
Awkward tension grew between the two men as they trekked over to the cargo bay. Ren didn't mind it as much, but he could detect that it was bothering the pilot. He hoped the man wouldn't try to create small talk with him.
"Soooooo," Poe started to say. Great. "You seem to be a tough teacher."
"I warned Rey I would be." Ren didn't feed too much into the conversation, so the topic died pretty fast.
The pilot, however, was content with finding a new issue to discuss. "She seems to be serious about staying with you."
Satisfaction dispersed throughout Ren's disposition and he purposely didn't try to hide it.
They walked up the ramp as Poe struggled to match Ren's long strides. "Then why are you still here?" Ren asked.
Poe jumped in front of him, making Ren stop and eye the pilot with contempt. "I don't trust you around her. In more ways than one." The pilot's thoughts were picturing various degrees of violence and sexual situations between Ren and Rey, none of which he would ever do to her.
Ren took a step forward, but Poe didn't back down. At least he could use his height as a means of intimidation, since the guy was a few inches shorter than him. "You think you can stop me from doing what I want?" The question was sinister, causing Poe to almost snarl in response. Ren enjoyed getting a reaction out of the guy way too much.
"No," Poe answered. "But I'd still try."
Always the hero.
"How chivalrous of you," Ren mocked. Wanting to be done with their quaint chat, he moved to the ladder to make his way to the top level.
"You're an asshole."
Ren laughed into the open space, surprising both him and Poe. He stood on the overhang and feigned being offended, but couldn't stop his self-satisfied smile from spreading across his pale face.
Ren shrugged and said, "At least we agree on one thing." He left the pilot in the cargo bay, feeling the guy fume of annoyance and shock.
Honestly, Ren was amazed that killing the man didn't crossed his mind. Not even once. Sure, he received gratification out of annoying Poe, but his first response to a situation like that would've been torture or murder.
Maybe he was starting to lose his edge.
Ren twitched with uneasiness.
()()()()()
Rey poured the chocolate powder into the water and stirred, noticing that she couldn't get the clumps to dissolve. She let out a deep huff as her patience started to thin. How did Ben get this to work? She took a sip, immediately spitting it back into the mug.
That's definitely not what Ben's tasted like.
Rey's knowledge when it came to cooking and making drinks was extremely lacking. If she were asked to warm up rations, she would be the one to turn to, but actually cooking something from nothing? That process eluded her.
When she came aboard the freighter, she had veered off to the galley in a desperate need for some water. Ben had told her she wasn't allowed to have any until she had her form perfected, which peeved her beyond measure. Master Skywalker never tried to deprive her of basic human necessities, so why did Ben think he could? No one should be trained that way. Being hungry and thirsty reminded Rey too much of growing up on Jakku, and those memories never sat well with her.
And the dozens of times Ben whacked her with his dueling cane had almost pushed her over the edge of self control. She'd been so close to stealing it from his grasp and beating him with it.
You asked for this. Stop complaining, she reprimanded herself. But something felt off about her. She didn't usually get this irritated so easily.
Now, all she wanted to do was taste the delectable chocolate drink Ben had made and she couldn't even figure that out. She dumped the mug into the sink, almost breaking the simple white cup. Her hands rested on the edge of the counter as she closed her eyes, trying to calm herself.
A voice broke through her reverie. "What did the cup ever do to you?"
Rey turned. Ben stood in the entryway, his eyes scrutinizing her tense exterior.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" It was like he could see something she couldn't about herself.
Hesitantly, he stepped into the galley and came toward her, still having the studious expression on his face. "You just… feel differently than usual." Rey didn't know how to respond to the weird analysis, so she just stated the obvious.
"Probably because I'm irritated."
Ben shrugged, closing the distance between him and the metal sink.
"Maybe…" he said as he glanced at the tipped over mug. His eyesight roamed over Rey's head to see the chocolate powder opened on the counter.
"You tried to make hot chocolate? In the middle of the day?" He said it like she should know what time it was appropriate to have hot chocolate, which she didn't. It had tasted delicious, so shouldn't she be able to drink it whenever she wanted?
"Yeah, well... I couldn't figure out how you made it."
He smiled down at her as her cheeks unwillingly began to flush, betraying her embarrassment. He neared her, his body pressing her up against the counter, making her bend backwards until her head hit the cabinet. The warmth of his torso against hers seeped through her clothes, causing her breathing to hitch and her mouth to go dry. He reached into the cabinet above her and brought out a paper wrapped bar.
"I can teach you how to make it, but I think you'll like this better." He stepped back, giving her some space as he held the bar out to her. She was flustered by his close proximity. It took her hand a moment to respond to her internal command to take what Ben was offering her. Anticipation flared out of him, and Rey wondered what was inside the brown wrapping.
She ripped the paper, inspecting the dark, compacted substance underneath. Tentatively, she brought it between her teeth and broke off a piece. The flavor was similar to the hot chocolate, but this was a thousand times more potent and sweet.
She was stunned. Frozen. Eyes wide enough to pop from their sockets. Her eyes met Ben's, his wide smile crinkling his lids as he watched her. She was helpless in stopping herself from shoving half of it in her mouth, needing more.
It was much more enjoyable to let the chocolate melt on her tongue and than chew it, causing it to come out of the sides of her mouth. Her eyes closed and she groaned out of gratification as she wiped her lips and licked her fingers.
An unrecognizable, but strong emotion blasted from Ben and flared up deep within her. Still licking her fingers and mouth, she opened her eyes and gazed directly at his indulgent expression. His eyes glossed over and he studied her mouth like it was the first time he'd ever seen such a thing.
He gulped and ran his hands through his hair. Rey could tell from his shaky breaths that he was struggling with something, but she wasn't sure what. He did have a sweet tooth, so maybe he really wanted some of the chocolate?
She held it out to him, but he shook his head. "No, it's yours. You can have as much as you want. There's more in the cupboard behind you."
"Thank you," she said between chews.
"Have you eaten any food yet?"
"Other than this?" She held up the mostly eaten bar. "No, I haven't. But I drank a liter of water." Her stomach sure felt like it had.
Ben moved over to the cabinets and started to grab a handful of bags and jars Rey couldn't identify. Pans clanged onto the stove and she observed as he poured water and a white grainy substance into the medium sized pot. She didn't know Ben could do something as domestic as cooking. They'd only been living off of rations and dehydrated food since landing on Spira.
In one fluid motion, Rey jumped onto the counter and sat on the flat surface, eating her choc bar while watching Ben handle the ingredients. "I didn't know you could cook."
A soft chuckle came from him as he opened the jar and poured the contents into a small saucepan. "This is hardly cooking. I can reheat things, but other than that, my knowledge in the culinary arts is limited."
Well, this is more than what I can do.
He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. "Are you starting to feel better?"
She nodded. For the most part she felt more settled, but something uncomfortable was still bubbling beneath the surface. "I guess not eating or drinking anything and whacking a tree for a few hours brings out the worst in me."
He stirred the sauce as it began to bubble. "Look at what you accomplished when we did fight, though. You executed the strike perfectly."
She flatly looked at him. "I don't appreciate being tricked into hitting you. Especially in the face." She thought of when she slashed his face on Starkiller... how in that moment, she'd been tempted to kill him.
"I know how to take a beating, Rey." She didn't doubt that he did, but she had the inkling that he enjoyed the pain a little too much.
He turned away from the stove, giving Rey his full attention. His demeanor gave off an air of seriousness and Rey braced herself for a potential lecture. "So... I'm not exactly sure how to bring this up, which is why I'm just going to say it: You were feeding too much into your anger while training."
Rey exhaled dramatically. "I thought you said the choice of where my power comes from is my decision."
Ben reluctantly nodded. "It is, but you made it pretty clear to me that you don't want to use the Dark side."
"I don't."
"But you were, and I could feel how you were struggling to control yourself."
"You are talking to me about control?" she bit back, immediately regretting it. His searing eyes pinched and his temples protruded as he clenched his jaw. Her visage froze, realizing for the first time in a few days who she was really talking to. This man had a temper and she was pushing him when she knew she shouldn't.
Ben kept his voice even. "I know I have my own set of problems, but we're talking about you. Not me. Don't turn the conversation around." They squared off against one another, each one silently fighting for dominance over the situation. Surprisingly, Ben was the one who backed down as he took a deep breath and turned back to stirring the red sauce.
Letting in her anger and frustration had felt so easy. It even gave her a sense of strength Rey never knew she had. But once she was able to calm down, the exhaustion had set in and she felt off, like she'd compromised a part of herself for the power.
"It's, uh... hard for me to control my emotions while fighting," Rey said sheepishly. Ben stopped stirring as he listened to her quiet voice. "I even struggled on the island while dueling Master Skywalker, but today I let my anger escalate more than I should have. I'm sorry for snapping at you."
Ben relaxed his shoulders. "Rey," he whispered, twisting to look at her. She was glad to see that his expression was full of tenderness and understanding, instead of judgement and chastisement. He placed his hands on the countertop next to her thighs as he came in close, making her knees touch against his trousers. "You never need to apologize to me about how hard it is to contain your emotions. In fact, how about you never apologize to me again. Ever."
Never apologize?
"But I've said and done things that are rude or hurtful."
"No, you haven't. If I want an apology, I'll ask for it. Plus, if anyone can understand your struggle to control your anger, I can. I have twenty-nine years worth of it. So don't think I would ever get offended if you let it show."
She glanced down at her lap, watching as she twisted her fingers anxiously.
She just started learning the ways of the Force and she was already having trouble with regulating her emotions. What if she couldn't do it? "Ben, I don't like how the Dark side makes me feel. I don't want to use it," she confessed.
He leaned in closer. "I know, and I'll help you as much as I can to keep you in the Light."
Her eyes swooped back up to his as the shock of what he said shook her core. "You – you would? You'd help me do that?" Does he even know how to do that? But she knew he did. He spent the first twenty-three years of his life fending off the darkness until he made the choice to finally let it in.
His stare beseeched her. "Rey, I would never take away your right to choose. Even if I do believe that the Light side is inferior, I'll support what you decide to do."
Who are you, Rey was about to ask, for she never thought she would hear such a statement come out of his mouth.
A Dark side user helping someone stay in the light. I wonder how that'll work. But… "What if, in the end, I choose the dark? You would just let me?"
It took a moment for him to reply. "If that is the path you want, then yes." That was not the exact answer she wanted.
Straightening her posture, she put as much conviction behind her demand as possible. "Ben, no, you have to stop me from ever choosing that."
His forehead furrowed in confusion. "But–"
"No buts. I can tell you with absolute certainty that if I ever do fall, there will always be a part of me that will want to be stopped from going down that path. I need you to promise me that you'll do whatever is necessary to bring me back." Dread filled his dark eyes as he stared deep into hers. Is this how he feels? Does he want someone to save him, just how I would want someone to save me?
Her hands clasped onto his arms. "Please. I need you to promise me." She could hear the sauce violently bubbling in the pan as she staunchly held his gaze. Rey was pleading to him to do this for her, and she so desperately needed him to mutter those two simple words. "Please, Ben," she added.
Her future was tied with his, but she could feel something looming over her fate. It was obscure in detail and sinister in feeling and she knew that the day she would face it was fast approaching. They couldn't stay on Spira forever, nor could they ignore the unrest in the galaxy. Their life of pretend would soon be over and she wondered where that would leave the two of them.
From the melancholy look in Ben's eyes, he knew the truth as well. "I promise," he muttered.
A big exhale of relief escaped Rey's lungs as she relaxed her head against his shoulder. Her arms wrapped around his back, pulling him closer, her body demanding the comfort of his warmth. He hesitated before mimicking her embrace, letting his fingers stroke through her coarse hair. His warm breath trailed down her cheek and she could've been mistaken, but she was sure she felt Ben kiss the crown of her head.
What would it feel like to have those lips on my skin?
They eventually parted, letting their focus return to preparing the meal. Rey found the flavors to be absolutely delicious and praised Ben for making it. He shrugged off the compliment as he downplayed his efforts. Poe had joined them just as they began eating at the lounge table. Ben had told him to make his own food; Rey invited him to eat what was made.
The two men sat across from each other, making the ambiance of the room tense. Rey focused on scarfing down her portion, only noticing Poe and Ben staring at her once she was finished. She should've felt embarrassed, but she was so damn hungry that she didn't care.
Ben caught her attention. "So, if you don't have anything else to demand of me today, I was wondering if I could show you something."
"Show her what?" Poe asked, his mouth full of food.
Ben tried to ignore him, but Rey saw his eye involuntarily twitch. "Sure. Is it more Force training?"
"Uh, not really... no."
Poe gulped down his food. "Hmmmm… Sounds suspicious." Ben glared at him, but all Poe did was smile as he took another bite. Rey found the little tiff amusing, but she didn't let it show.
Ben put his attention back on Rey. "We can start the washing some clothes before we head out, if you want." Rey nodded in excitement. Maybe if she bugged Ben long enough, he'd let her take apart the machine so she could see how it worked.
"Oh, my clothes need to be washed as well," Poe chimed in. "Mind if I throw them in?"
"Yes."
"No," Rey countered, holding Ben with a serious stare.
As usual, Rey won the dispute.
()()()()()
"Nervous?" Ben asked.
The evening sun was fighting to break free from the overcast clouds, but its light was still beating down on the clear ocean water as Rey and Ben stood just outside the waves. There was a small breeze to cool off Rey's warm skin and play with her loose hair. No matter how beautiful the view, though, trepidation was starting to slip into her expression and Ben was catching onto how jumpy her eyes were.
She glanced up and caught him watching her with his black, warm eyes. This look of caring and patience was reserved for her and only her, making her feel like she was the only woman in the whole galaxy. "Well, the last time I did this I drowned, so…."
He nodded in understanding. "You want to go back to the ship?"
Rey chewed at the inside of her cheek, considering that if she did back down, she would view herself as a coward. "No, I want to do this."
His light grin made her feel slightly better. "Okay." He took a step back and eyed her up and down. She was wearing one of his black sleeveless undershirts and brown trousers, paired with his dark undergarments underneath. Her chest wrap and other undergarments were in the wash, so Rey was forced to go without any support on her chest. Not like it mattered since she barely had any breasts to begin with, but it still made her uncomfortable without it.
"Uh..." Ben began, slightly timid. "People tend to wear clothes that are acclimated to swimming, but I'm sure you'll be fine in that."
Now Ben was more nervous out of the two as he pushed his hair back and avoided eye contact. Rey looked at her attire, realizing that the amount of clothing she wore would probably weigh her down in the water.
Well, I'm wearing his undershorts so maybe I should just swim in those. It wasn't like she was jumping into the water naked. And he had seen her in her chest wrap after the battle on the island. So why did she feel so nervous about wearing shorts in front of him?
You know what, you took him up on his offer to teach you how to swim and you will not let the matter of clothing get in the way of that.
Before Rey put too much thought into it, she slipped the trousers off her waist and brushed them aside with her foot. Heat spread into her cheeks as she walked confidently out into the water, relishing in how warm and relaxing it felt. She stopped when the tide rose to her waist and pivoted around, wondering what was taking Ben so long to join her.
He was frozen on the beach, staring straight at her in astonishment. "You can't teach me how to swim from the beach," she called out to him. "You have to get in the water, you know." Her torso twisted from side to side as her hands glided over the sparkling water and her toes dug into the silky sand.
Ben took a step forward, and then glanced down at his shirt and pants. Rey knew he liked being covered, especially while in the company of other people. The hesitancy stemmed back to his hatred of making himself vulnerable, but with Rey, he had nothing to be afraid of.
Rey was growing impatient while waiting for him to make a decision. Slowly, he lifted his arms over his head and clutched onto the back of his shirt, pulling it off of his body in one motion. His hair dropped over his face and he shook it out of his eyes as he stalked forward into the ocean, making the decision to keep his pants on.
Rey couldn't stop from gawking at him.
He was just as she remembered from the island, but the brightness of day accentuated all the curves of his muscles and the durability of his sturdy shoulders and neck. Her eyes wondered down his robust chest and onto his constricted middle. His trousers were sagging lower from the pull of water and she could make out a v-shape curving down his pelvis….
She snapped her eyes away, feeling embarrassed at inspecting him in such an intimate manner. He probably didn't appreciate being stared at. She should respect his boundaries.
The loud splashing made it known to her that he was near, and she decided to watch him close the rest of the gap between them. His face was blank, but his eyes… they were on fire as he gazed at her. Never had she met another person that could fill the same level of passion into their eyes as Ben could muster into one stare.
He halted an arms length away and loomed over her small stature. Rey gulped, knowing she should look away, but doing so would seem akin to committing a crime.
"Ready?" he asked.
Rey nodded as her mind reminded her of the reason they were out here in the first place. She turned to walk further into the water, but Ben grabbed her waist.
"And where do you think you're going?" His voice was full of the playful tone Rey had come to like.
"Don't we need to go further out into the water?"
"How about we stay in the shallows where you can learn how to keep yourself afloat and how to properly use your arms." As usual, Ben wanted to take things slow. Way too slow.
She glanced behind at the vast sea. "But I–"
He chuckled. "You always want to jump before knowing where you're going, don't you?" Rey did have a certain amount of impatience when it came to learning. Ben was quickly picking up on that.
"When I want to be good at something, I like to get the learning aspect of it done quickly."
He smiled at her honesty. Rey mirrored his expression. "Looks like you and I have something in common, but trust me. It won't take you long to learn how to swim."
Ben started off by having her float on her back. Rey was finding it tricky to not let herself sink. Every time a small wave came over her head, her breathing became erratic and she started to panic. Flashes of drowning on Ahch-To would play in her thoughts and rekindle her fears, but Ben rarely loosened his grip on her.
He stayed by her side while kneeling in the water, keeping his hands under her body to help her stay afloat. It took her a while, but she finally got used to hovering atop the salty ocean.
When Ben proposed going deeper into the waves, Rey almost jumped out of her skin in anticipation. The further she stepped into the sea, though, the more she started to panic and question her decision.
"Here," Ben said, grabbing Rey's waist and guiding her legs to wrap around his midsection. Rey looked at him, but he was too focused on swimming them out deeper into the water to catch her gaze. Grasping tightly onto his shoulders, her hands took on a life of their own, wondering over flesh she had no claim to. The feel of his bare shoulders and tight chest slipping over her fingers… and the water lubricating the friction… and the heat of him seeping into her and running up her body made her feel reckless.
Everything was quiet and she hadn't even realized Ben had stopped swimming. Her wondering palms must have gotten his attention, for he was ardently gazing at her while his arms fanned out and his legs kicked below. If he stilled or tried to grab her, they would go under. Rey felt so powerful knowing that he couldn't stop her from touching him.
To hell with boundaries.
Her hands continued their journey over his pale skin, beginning by going down and up his sides. Sliding over his wide chest, she had an innate desire to feel his stomach, so her fingers slid further down between them. There were so many grooves of muscle that it astounded her that a man could feel and look so strong.
Gods, she was having a difficult time thinking straight. His skin was shooting energy inside her body that was so electric, she thought her heart would stop from its sheer potency. How is it possible for him to make me feel this way? Ben wasn't doing anything as he treaded water and let her explore his torso, but he was doing enough by just being there.
Her fingers swept through his wet hair, appreciating how thick and silky it felt. She traced the scar on his face, down his neck, and onto his shoulder. The blemish was a blatant reminder of who this man was or better yet, who she thought he had been. To compare their first ever meeting on Takodana to what was happening right now was hard to even fathom. He'd been so shrouded in darkness and threats, that the idea of this man being beneath that thick shadow would have made her laugh in disbelief.
But here he was, making her feel things she never thought possible.
()()()()()
Ren breathlessly spoke her name. A visceral need accumulated deep within his gut as he felt her palms ravage his skin. No one… not one single soul had ever touched him as fondly as Rey was doing right then. He desperately needed to return her touch, but he had to keep them above the water or the moment would be ruined. Rey had all the control, which was probably a good thing since his hands wanted to do inappropriate things to her womanly figure.
She cupped his face with her small hands, staring at his parted lips. He needed to know what she was feeling. He tugged on their connection gently, silently imploring her to let him in.
A strong punch of arousal made him almost black out as he realized that the emotion was coming from her. She feels this way for me? How? When? Is it possible to be this lucky? No, there is no such thing as luck. He had no logical explanation for what was happening, so he searched her eyes instead.
They held some type of mysterious, active fluid, a force that dragged everything in, like the undertow of a wave retreating from the shore on a tempestuous day. It threatened to drag him under. So his stare held onto her ears, her nose, her hair sticking to her skin; but as soon as he returned to her pupils, the wave emerged from within and stretched its tendrils toward his soul. Each wave was pure and full of light as it threatened to envelope him and swallow him whole. For the first time in his life, he wished to be someone else so he could believe in his mind that he really deserved this woman, for the person looking at her was not worthy to gaze at such a serene face.
As if testing his reaction, she moved closer, their noses touching. He didn't pull away because he wanted this just as badly as she did. Her head tilted and she caressed his face with her thumbs. The sound of the water drowned out the rush of blood in his ears as his heart hammered against his ribs. He prayed that she wouldn't stop, that she would close the distance between them…
Their lips barely touched, teasing him of the human contact he'd always yearned for from her. She pulled back slightly, looking at him with uncertainty. He wanted this more than he'd ever wanted anything in his entire existence, and he pressed that to her across their connection. She didn't hesitate as she locked her soft lips fully onto his.
Her kiss was a fire, first in his mouth then down in his belly, an all-powerful wave that filled him out from the inside, giving him a strength he never knew existed. Every life he took, all the rage that fueled his drive, and every minute spent in obscurity paled in comparison with the power he felt from Rey's lips pressing against his own.
His hands clung onto her back, dipping beneath the undershirt and spreading his palms on her bare back. As quickly as he touched her, they suddenly dipped under the water. He'd been so lost in the moment that he forgot he was the one keeping them upright.
He felt her immediately panic as she tried to claw her way out of his grip. While keeping one arm wrapped around her middle, he broke through the surface, hearing her frightened breaths next to his ear. He paddled quickly back to where he could stand before grabbing her face and looking at her scared expression.
"Are you okay?" he asked her.
She coughed and peeled the hair away from her eyes. "I, uh, I think I'm done with swimming lessons for the day." He scolded himself for losing her trust in teaching her how to swim. Stupid, moronic- "We can continue tomorrow, if that's okay. Going under the water caught me off guard and I just need a break." She gave him a timid smile as he looked at her with surprise.
"Yeah – yeah of course. We can start again tomorrow." Stars, he prayed to every entity out there they would do this again tomorrow.
Ren brought her into the shallows, allowing her to walk on her own back to the beach. Words escaped him and he wasn't sure what to say. He feared that this could possibly be a dream and if he woke to find himself in his room, he would not be able to stop from igniting his saber and destroying every single thing in his vicinity.
Rey darted to her trousers, picking them up off the sand and turning to face him. He couldn't stop his eyes from roaming over her in his clothes. He was content with never seeing her in anything else.
She must have realized what he was thinking, for their connection was still open. Her cheeks blushed and her eyes grew wide. He sensed how much she wanted him, all of it in the most carnal ways possible.
"I need – I need to use the refresher," she blurted out before dashing to the tree line, the setting sun casting her long shadow across the sand. She harshly shut their connection, and Ren took a step back as if a door had suddenly closed on him. He watched as she disappeared beyond the vegetation, confusion growing in his thoughts.
Do I go after her? Does she want to be alone? Is she regretting what happened? Should I have stopped it from happening?
Ren was not a people person, nor did he know how to handle women. Rey had blatantly ran away from him, so in the very least he was able to deduce that she most likely wanted space to think over what had transpired. Interestingly, all he wanted to do was be by her side again.
His mind raced as he realized just how attached he'd grown to one, single person. All his life he'd hated being around people. Everything about humanity disgusted him; they all lied, cheated, and went out of their ways to be someone they weren't just so they could forward their own agendas. He could feel their greedy emotions and pick up their selfish thoughts whenever he was in a crowd, and it had been suffocating.
With Rey, he didn't pick up on any of that. The first authentic person he had ever come across in his life and they just so happen to be bound together. Now, though, he couldn't help but feel like things just got a lot more complicated between them.
Once back to the ship, Ren went straight for the living quarters, noticing the sounds of the shower in the refresher. He was somewhat dry, so he decided to wait in his chambers for the shower to become available. He changed into his black leather pants and a dark long sleeved shirt, slipping a split tunic over the thin material that hit right above his knees. His hair was still damp, but that didn't stop him from laying across the bottom bunk. Exhaustion quickly settled into his bones and he let his eyes drift closed as he replayed the events of the day.
If Rey ended up regretting what had happened, it would devastate him, but he would understand why she felt that way. He represented everything she desperately didn't want to become, so how could she want to be with him? He felt her desire, but only in the most superficial ways of pleasure and fleshly needs. To deny that he wanted the same thing would deny that the Force existed. But he wanted more than the superficial with Rey. What he wanted – and he realized it went against all his years of training to rid himself of sentiment – was their hearts to align and run parallel into a shared destiny. Sex was meaningless if he couldn't have her affection, and he knew that was close to impossible.
As his fingers slid across his mouth, he thought about how her lips caressed his... and how that memory was going to torment him for the rest of his waking days. It had been his first and maybe last kiss, but even knowing the heartache it would give him, he'd never take it back.
()()()()()
Ren snapped awake, shooting up in his bed and hitting his forehead on the top bunk. He cursed out loud while rubbing the pain away, noticing the light was still on in the room. He must've drifted off to sleep while waiting for Rey to be done using the refresher.
But something had made him suddenly awaken. It was a minute feeling, but it had resonated within him since the emotion was not his own. It was pure, unadulterated excitement and it had been coming from Rey.
What is she doing?
He walked to her room and commanded the door to open, but she was nowhere inside. He quickly checked the lounge and the galley, also coming up empty. Taking a deep breath, he scanned the surrounding area for her signature and still, he couldn't find her. Their connection was closed, but he knew he could force it open. The need to do so never came up before, as he wanted Rey to think that she could have her privacy. But panic was about to overtake him and he needed to know where she was.
Rightfuckingnow.
He clawed at her barrier in full strength and felt it pop, the knowledge of where she'd gone immediately flooding his awareness. Now, he was definitely panicking.
Rey had snuck out sometime during the night and had gone into the city. His immediate response was to find her and drag her back before she was noticed, but he stopped as he weighed that thought. The First Order didn't know what she looked like, and the likelihood of her being recognized was zero. But what if she runs into some other kind of trouble? Does she even know how to navigate through a big city?
Snoke was for sure looking for him. If he went to find her, it could cause trouble.
What the hell do I do?
The conversation he had the other day with Poe came to mind. He didn't know why, but he knew these sudden thoughts shouldn't be ignored. The pilot had stolen clothes and fuel, I told him about the credit chip, I let the pilot feel guilty for his thievery–
Wait.
"The credit chip," Ren said on an exhale.
He sprinted to his room, full out lunging for the side table. He opened the drawer, rifling through the contents, but not finding the card. The next second he was at the pilots door, commanding the Force to unlock the entryway.
The lights illuminated in the room. "Did you tell Rey about the Galactic Credit chip?!" Poe jumped frantically out of bed, wearing only his briefs and going for the blaster on the nightstand. He was confused, the deep lines of sleep still plaguing his face as he processed what was happening.
The pilot's face went from confusion, to panic, before finally settling on anger. "What the hell are you doing in here?! Get the fuck out!"
Ren ignored his request. "Did you tell Rey about my credit chip?"
"What?" The pilot's brows pinched together. Ren charged at the man, but halted as Poe pointed the blaster right at his chest. "Whoa, back off man. I don't know what the hell's going on. So how about you wipe that murderous look off your face and explain to me what this is all about, like a rational human being."
Ren was tempted to rip the information he needed out of Poe's head and leave the guy a whisper of who he used to be, but he resisted. Instead, he clenched his teeth and breathlessly explained what was unfolding. Thankfully, Poe lowered the blaster just as Ren entertained the thought of tearing the pilot's arm from its socket.
"The First Order doesn't even know what Rey looks like. Let the girl live a little and wonder around the city. Khalon looked like a well maintained town when I went there."
Ren stared at the pilot, flabbergasted as to what he was saying. "Did you miss the part where I said the chip is directly linked to First Order funds? Or are you suffering from bloodburn?"
"I don't have that disease and yes, I heard you say–" Poe froze, finally comprehending what Ren was trying to explain to him. "The First Order can track your chip use," Poe stated, wide eyed.
"Yes, did you convey that detail to Rey?"
"Convey it to her?" Astonishment shone in the pilot's large eyes. "You didn't even convey that to me! How was I–" Ren balled his fists at his sides and left the startled pilot in his quarters. Poe was right; he had left that detail unknown to the pilot so the man could stew over what he'd done. He should have remembered to ask Poe to steal some clothes for Rey, then maybe she wouldn't have ventured off to the city.
Shit, shit, shit…
Ren entered his own room, quickly putting on his boots and thick belt so he could hide his saber hilt beneath it. He made his way down the hallway and slid down the ladder that led into the cargo bay. The ramp opened upon his command and he jumped into the driver's seat of the compact speeder. Poe landed in the passenger's side and the two men took a moment to stare at one another.
"Get out," Ren ordered.
"No." Poe snapped back. "You might need my help."
"I don't need your help."
"Well, that's too damn bad, cause you're gonna get it. Unless you'd rather keep glaring at me and waste more time." Ren's eyes pinched, but the pilot didn't back down. There was no time to argue and maybe, just maybe, the guy could be useful.
Ren entered his passcode and the speeder came to life. He guided the machine through the trees, looking for a big enough opening onto the beach. Once finding it, he hit the throttle and blasted them onto the coast, setting his sights on the illuminated city ahead.
"Exactly how do you plan on finding her? The city is huge!" Poe yelled over the rushing wind. Ren could feel Rey trying to suppress their connection, but he kept fighting for control and so far, he was winning.
"I can feel her," Ren responded as he saw a wide trail come into his view, appearing to lead into the city. More than likely, Rey had taken this exact route.
"Can't she hide her Force signature or something?"
So, the pilot knows some basics about the Force.
Ren slowed the speeder as he turned it onto the dirt trail. "She can't hide it from me." The deceleration of the speeder no longer required them to shout over the roaring wind.
The pilot gave Ren a quizzical look. "You're that powerful or something?"
Ren didn't answer because he wasn't exactly sure what to say. No one outside of the party involved knew about the Force bond, and he wasn't in a very sharing mood at the moment. Poe might look at Rey differently once he knew she was tied to such a monster, and Ren didn't want the girl to lose the small amount of friends she had. She treasured them, so where did that leave him in her life? He was starting to think too much about a topic that made him feel uneasy.
"Something like that," Ren muttered. Poe left the matter alone as he recognized Ren's mood of not wanting to elaborate.
The rest of the ride was silent as Ren zipped the speeder through the wavy trail, which turned into a paved road the closer they came to Khalon. Finally, the wide gates of the city came into view and Ren noted the guards at both posts as they entered the robust town.
Humans and aliens littered the streets ahead, making it impossible to maneuver the speeder. It would be easier to look for Rey on foot, so he decided to park the machine off to the side. Before shutting off the engine, he glanced at the time portal that lined up with the planets epoch schedule. It was two-thirteen in the morning. Ren cursed at the town for never sleeping.
He started to walk down a random street. The pilot followed without making a sound. Not surprisingly, Ren was taller than the vast majority of beings and could easily get a wider range of sight, but in this case, it didn't help much. He was relying on the connection to find Rey, which was getting more and more difficult to keep open. The girl was fighting him and he could sense her panic once she realized he was in the city.
Gentle pleas resonated through the bond as Rey begged him to let her stay a little longer. She was having fun, something she'd never experienced before in a town of this magnitude. He ignored her so he could focus on her location.
His mind was telling him to go left. He sprinted down an alleyway, pushing tourists from his path and ignoring their yells of offense. Ren followed his senses, which had him make two more lefts and a then a right. The last turn led him into a big, open quad. Vendors of various foods and trinkets lined the stony ground, obstructing his clean view. She was so close he felt like if he reached his hand out, he could touch her.
Ren circled a few carts, keeping his eyes sharp when he abruptly locked onto Rey's back in the distance. He didn't hesitate to run to her side, but before he reached out to her, she spun around, a hard look plastered on her features.
"You shouldn't have come here. I'm perfectly fine," she bit at him.
"I shouldn't have come here? None of us should be here! You–" He paused and took a step back as he started to take in her new appearance. A black, sleeveless jumpsuit hugged her every curve, a pair of black boots blending into the material to give the illusion she was taller than she actually was. Her light blue vest went down to the middle of her thighs and was tied shut by a brown leather belt. A satchel hung at her waist and black armbands covered her forearms. Her hair was even different as it had been pulled into a single braid from the top of her head, all the way down to her shoulder. A string of thoughts shot through his mind; the first being how she should never wear black around him.
The second: she had obviously used the credit chip.
Ren was too late.
He grabbed her arm, dragging her through the crowd as she protested. "What's wrong with you? I know I shouldn't have come here, but–"
He whipped around as he snapped at her. "That chip is linked to the First Order! They can track everything you bought directly to this city!" Rey's face paled and her mouth slackened. Ren probably shouldn't be shouting at her, but he couldn't control himself. She stole from him and came here after he told her not to. "We need to–"
A sharp pinch resonated in his neck. His hand shot up, pulling a small metal dart from his skin. Him and Rey gazed at it in his opened palm and then locked eyes. Her horrified face swam out of focus and the city noise sounded more distant with every labored breath. Ren tried telling her to run, but what came out of his mouth was something more close to a groan than any actual language.
Rey yelled his name and lunged forward as his knees gave out and his vision went black.
A/N
Uh oh! Things are now starting to heat up. We have some progression with their first kiss and with someone finding Rey and Ben at the end. This chapter totally got away from me and I wrote a lot. If you don't like the length, I apologize and I am going to try and refrain from making the chapters so long.
Who do you think found them? Do you think these characters should communicate to each other better? They probably should! Let me know what you thought of the chapter! I always love hearing from all of you!