By Darkryt Orbinautz

With Honeyed Claws

Chapter 3

I've Heard of Cuddlesex, But This Is Ridiculous

Twilight was sitting at Rarity's desk, sketching plans for catching Fluttershy. She was constantly redrawing her plan as she realized ways Fluttershy's abilities could ruin them. "First we send Pinkie to distract her … no, no, Fluttershy will hypnotize her. What if we have Rainbow Dash fly over – can Dash fly with that massive tail? Darn it ..." Frustrated, Twilight tore off a page, tossed it, then collapsed her head on the desk. She perked up at the sound of the door opening.

"Twiley?"

"Oh!" Twilight exclaimed. She rushed to the door to greet Shining Armor and Cadence. "B.B.B.F.F!" Twilight engaged Shining Armor in a tight hug. "I'm so glad we're here. We could really use your help."

"So I heard." Shining replied. "It's not as bad as the letter made it sound, is it?"

Twilight gave him a pitying look. She gestured for him to follow her. "Come on." She led him and Cadence up the stairs, to Rarity's guest room. Twilight opened the door and …

"Rainbow Dash!" Twilight snapped.

"Mmm?" Rainbow Dash groaned. Pinkie Pie's legs were sticking out of and flailing from Rainbow Dash's over-extended mouth. "F'yeah?"

"Spit … the Pinkie Pie … out."

Rainbow Dash whimpered in protest, looking at Twilight sadly.

"Drop her." Twilight said, pointing at the ground like she ordering a dog. "Come on."

Dash groaned. Slowly, disgustingly, Pinkie Pie oozed out of Dash's mouth, easing Pinkie Pie into her coils. Pinkie's upper half was coated in saliva, she was wearing a dopey grin, and rainbow-colored spirals were swirling in her eyes.

"Rainbow Dash, what did you do?" Twilight asked, running towards them and pulling Pinkie from Dash's tail.

"I-I'm sorry, Twilight." Dash twiddled her fingers, turning away bashfully. "I … I felt like there was a hole inside me that was eating me from the inside. And … and the only way to fill it was to swallow somebody. Pinkie was there, so I … I hypnotized her and had nearly gotten her when you came in."

Twilight worked on setting Pinkie on the floor. Pinkie could stand on her own, but she was unsteady and staring into space. "Hmm ..." Twilight tapped her chin. "How do we fix this?"

"I don't know ..." Dash said. She rose up and carried her human-half in the air towards Pinkie. "Maybe I can, like, reverse-hypnotize her?" She got close to Pinkie, but Twilight grabbed Pinkie and dragged her away from Dash, obviously not trusting her.

"Let me try ..." Cadence said, coming near Pinkie. She raised her hand, glowing blue with magic, and waved it over Pinkie's head. Nothing happened. "Hmm." Cadence took Pinkie by the shoulders. "I'll need to study her a bit more before I can make a counter-spell." While Cadence turned Pinkie towards the door, Applejack came up the stairs.

"Has anybody seen Rarity?" Applejack asked.

"No." Shining Armor answered, even though he'd only been here a few minutes. "Why?"

"She said she was going to get Sweetie Belle." Twilight explained to him. "I told her to hurry, since Fluttershy's still loose. She should have been back by now ..."

Rarity hurried to Fluttershy's cottage to give that no-good snake her what-for. It wasn't until she had already arrived outside that she realized she should have gone back to the boutique to get her friends. It was too late now, as she was already here, and she was unwilling to leave to get her friends for fear of it being too late when they returned. She couldn't allow Fluttershy to hypnotize Sweetie Belle and then have stomach-tentacle sex with her, even if it meant going in alone. Sweetie Belle was much too young to be having stomach-tentacle sex! Or sex with any kind of tentacles! Or stomachs! Especially not stomachs!

Steeling her courage while at the same time gulping nervously, Rarity marched up to the door and banged on it. "Fluttershy! Fluttershy, I know you and Sweetie Belle are in there! Open this door right now!"

The door opened, but rather than a sultry Fluttershy or enthralled Sweetie Belle, it was an irate Angel who had answered. Angel glared at her like she was an idiot, then gestured for her to come inside.

"Sweetie Belle?" Rarity called. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw Sweetie Belle on the floor, playing with some toys. Sweetie Belle turned at the sound of her name. Her eyes were normal. "Oh, Sweetie Belle, darling, I'm so glad you're all right!"

"Why wouldn't I be?" Sweetie Belle shrugged. "Wait, I thought Fluttershy said you were busy?"

Rarity grimaced. Clearly, Sweetie Belle was blissfully unaware of what had happened to Fluttershy. "Eeerrr well … Fluttershy isn't … all there in the head right now, if you catch my drift. Don't worry, Twilight's working on a way to fix it. But for now, kindly join me in leaving." Rarity stepped aside and gestured to the door. Sweetie Belle got up and walked out with no fuss.

Rarity was confused. She was expecting a bigger fight than that. "Sweetie Belle, did Fluttershy put a post-hypnotic trigger in you?"

"Post what what?"

"Never mind. Go on ahead." Rarity watched as Sweetie Belle went down the ramp that led to Fluttershy's door.

"That's odd ..." Rarity scanned the house. Fluttershy wasn't in the foyer or the kitchen. Rarity noticed Angel glaring at her, urgently shaking his paws like he was shooing her out.

"Huh." Rarity put her hand on the doorknob to leave. But she had lingered just a bit too long, as an incredibly powerful muscle appeared as if from nowhere and wrapped around her waist. She let out a yelp as it pulled her up toward the ceiling.

"Oh, Rarity ..." Fluttershy said, her human-half hanging dropping from the ceiling as her tail raised Rarity up. Rarity saw that Fluttershy's coils were all over the ceiling, writhing slightly, somehow escaping her initial notice.

"I know how old Sweetie Belle it is." Fluttershy said. "You didn't really think it was her I was after, did you?" She affectionately rubbed Rarity's chin in a vaguely creepy way.

Rarity chuckled nervously. "Well, all the evidence, darling!" Rarity looked at the ground. Angel was staring at her disapprovingly, as if saying "nice going, falling for the totally obvious trap."

"Angel, darling, would you be a dear and get some help please?" Rarity asked sweetly, trying a desperate gamble. Angel appeared to think about it and moved towards the door.

"Angel, stay where you are." Fluttershy commanded. Angel obeyed, giving Rarity an apologetic smile and shrug. He bounced into the other room to go do bunny things.

"Now, Rarity … would you be so kind as to look at my eyes?"

"Ha!" Rarity closed her eyes and turned her head. "Rainbow Dash may have fallen prey to your tricks, but I will not succumb so easily!"

"Ooh. Please?"

"Nope! Forget it. Na-uh. Not. Happening." Rarity insisted, keeping her eyes shut tight. Her eyes briefly widened when she felt a sting on the back of her head, but she just as quickly closed them.

"Oh-ho! I see your game. You slapped the back of my head, hoping the sheer shock you of all people would resort to violence would be enough to startle me into opening my eyes. Isn't that right? Well, it was a good plan, Fluttershy, but I am one step ahead of you!"

"Hmm." Fluttershy tapped her chin, idly wiggling her tail as she tried to think of something to make Rarity open her eyes. "Ah-ha!" She snapped her fingers, having an idea.

Rarity had been surprised by Fluttershy slapping her, but she saw the ploy for what it was. However, what Fluttershy did next cause her to lose it. Not thinking, Rarity opened her eyes to scream at Fluttershy.

"KINDLY REMOVE YOUR TAIL-"

Rarity's infuriated screaming quieted down as she got a look into Fluttershy's eyes, now swirling multiple shades of pink and purple that made Rarity think of scented soaps and candles.

"From … my … cleavage ..." Rarity stuttered as she fell under the trance. She twitched her eye. "No, no. Mustn't look. Must not look ..."

"Oh, look for just a little bit, Rarity." Fluttershy cooed softly. "Please? For me?"

"A-all right." Rarity answered, magic causing her eyes to mirror Fluttershy's. "But- but only for a few seconds, and that's it!"

"Mm-hmm." Fluttershy pretended to agree, inching her face closer to Rarity's to allow better viewing of the colors. "And … maybe a few seconds more … and a few seconds more … and a few seconds more … doesn't that sound nice?"

"That … sounds lovely, darling."

"Ah just don't git it." Applejack said, pacing around Rarity's floor. "She should have been back by now … y'all think maybe sumthun happened tah her?"

"I don't know." Twilight shook her head.

"Y'all don't think Fluttershy got her, do you?"

Only when Applejack asked that question did Twilight realize they needed to form a search party. "Come on. We need to go find her!"

"Find who?" Pinkie asked, skipping into the room. "Are we playing hide-and-seek?"

"No, Pinkie, we are not – Pinkie! You can move on your own again!" When Cadence entered the room behind Pinkie, Twilight smiled. "Cadence, you fixed her!"

"Actually, I didn't." Cadence said, looking at Pinkie. "The hypnosis just sort of … went away on its own after awhile."

"Okay." Twilight nodded. "That's good to know. We need to go find Rarity. She said she was going to pick up - Sweetie Belle!" Twilight was surprised as the aforementioned Sweetie Belle entered the building.

"What are you all doing here?" Sweetie asked.

"Sweetie Belle, where's your sister?"

Sweetie Belle looked over her shoulder. "Huh. I thought was she behind me."

"Why would you think that?"

"Well, Fluttershy walked behind me ..."

Everyone's eyes widened. "What?" Twilight got down on her knees, putting hands on Sweetie Belle's shoulders. "Sweetie Bell, this is important, okay? What happened?"

"Um, well … Fluttershy came to school. She said Rarity was busy and wanted her to babysit me. Then we went to her house and Rarity came to get me, and I left and … went all the way home without realizing she wasn't behind me."

"Sweetie Belle." Twilight pursed her lips. "Do you notice anything … odd about Fluttershy?"

"No … well, now that you mention, she was standing in the bushes. And she ask me to walk in FRONT of her to her house. That was kinda weird."

"Girl's clever, Ah'll give her that." Applejack muttered.

Twilight nodded, then turned back to Sweetie Belle. "Where's Rarity now, if you had to guess?"

"Um … at Fluttershy's, probably. That was the last time I saw her."

Sweetie Belle was confused and at a loss when saying this caused everybody to dart past her to the door.

"Had enough?" Fluttershy teasingly asked Rarity after a few minutes of hypnotizing. She knew full well the answer would be "no." The longer someone stared into it, the more they wanted to see more of it. She had first-hand experience of that effect. Just like a drug.

"N-no." Rarity stammered. "I … want to keep looking. Please ..."

Fluttershy giggled. "Of course! No problem." Fluttershy allowed Rarity to keep staring, but her gaze went half-lidded. Examining Rarity's attractive body, Fluttershy curled the tip of her tail around Rarity's breasts, then coiled all around and had the tail slide over and curl around the other breast like giftwrap, tightly squeezing Rarity's bust. "Does that feel good, Rarity?"

"Y-yes." Rarity weakly nodded. Fluttershy squeezed Rarity's bust again, pulsating her tail in and out.

"You have such great breasts, Rarity ..." Fluttershy whispered. "And a magnificent body … it's a shame you don't get to really enjoy either ..."

"Wha … what do you mean?" Rarity sounded distressed.

"I mean, despite how much work you put into your appearance, people never seem to appreciate it ..." Fluttershy continued. All part of the play she had worked up to seduce Rarity. "I mean, the last two people who really admired your breasts were a man who was still more interested in flat-chested Twilight than you, and Applejack! Applejack, your best friend who was probably drunk at the time!"

Rarity frowned and whimpered. All that time she put in to making sure she looked her best, and what did she have to show for it?

"But I know how much work you put in." Fluttershy put her hand through Rarity's hair, curling a strand around her finger. "I wouldn't have the patience to do my hair up like this for one evening, let alone every day. Yet somehow, you find the time and the patience to make it look like this every morning ..."

Rarity chuckled, cheering up at Fluttershy's flattery. "Why, thank you, darling."

Now was time to seal the deal. "Rarity, let me admire your body." Fluttershy squeezed Rarity's firm bust again. "Let me appreciate your curves and aaaaalll of that effort you put into looking your best ..."

Fluttershy put both her hands on Rarity's cheeks. She leaned in close and whispered.

"Let me be good to you."

"O … okay. Yes." Rarity nodded. "Be good to me, Fluttershy ..."

"I'll be the best to you." Fluttershy growled seductively. "What would you like to do?"

"Hmm … w-well, your eyes have me thinking of – of soap …"

"Soap?" Fluttershy questioned, genuinely curious. "Huh. Soap. You mean, like a bath?" Fluttershy smirked, getting a devious idea. "How does a bath sound, Rarity?"

"Lovely ..."

"Excellent!" Fluttershy slithered herself along the wall to the floor, making sure to hold Rarity snug and keep her looking at the hypnosis. "I'll start some hot water ..." She slithered backwards into her bathroom.

Fluttershy reached down into the tub and twisted the knob, water streaming down from the faucet.

Fluttershy lowered Rarity to the ground. Fluttershy grabbed the back of Rarity's dress. "We'll need to get this thing out of the way. I can't admire your curves with this blocking my view ..."

"Ah, ah." Rarity scolded, pushing Fluttershy's hand away. "Please, darling. Allow me." Rarity crossed her arms and grabbed the straps of her dress. She pulled them down slowly, teasing Fluttershy.

"Yes." Fluttershy purred as Rarity started to pull her dress down. "Yes, that's it … show it off, Rarity." Rarity started sashaying and shimming as she pulled her dress the rest of the way down. Her broad smile showed that she was enjoying Fluttershy's attention on her body. Rarity let the dress drop to the floor. In the time it took for Rarity to undress, the water had reached a decent level and steam was rising up. Fluttershy curled her tail around Rarity, lifted her up and gently set Rarity into it.

Fluttershy smiled as Rarity sunk into the water. The hypnosis had made her body incredibly relaxed, allowing her to float easily.

"There. How's that feel, Rarity?" Fluttershy arched herself over the edge of the tub to aim the hypnosis at Rarity again.

"Fantastic, darling. Thank you." Rarity drunkenly muttered. "Your eyes are so pretty ..."

"So I've been told."

Fluttershy put her hand in the water and splashed Rarity, then put her wet hand on Rarity's cheek as she leaned in for a kiss. Fluttershy broke off the kiss and peered down at her chest as gravity pulled a drop of milk. The drop splashed into the water around Rarity's belly.

"Rainbow Dash … mentioned that … you fed her milk." Rarity said, noticing the milk drop despite her hypnotized state.

"Did she? … Would you like to try some?"

"Surrrre!"

Fluttershy smirked. Under the thrall of the hypnosis, the answer to every question became "yes." Although she liked to ask anyway, just to be nice.

Taking in a deep breath, Fluttershy moved towards Rarity, connecting her breast to Rarity's mouth. "There you go … suckle it." Rarity nodded, suckling hard on Fluttershy's bust. Rarity moaned, stopping for a moment to give a compliment.

"It's so sweeeeeet … just like you, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy chuckled. She pulled herself up and leveraged herself over Rarity. She cupped her hands on her breasts and squeezed out sprays of milk on Rarity, just like with Rainbow Dash. Rarity treated the whole thing like she was drinking from a water fountain, though that didn't prevent milk from getting all over her shoulders and chest, as well as mixing and dispersing in the water.

When Fluttershy stopped for a minute, Rarity looked around the puddle of milk-fogged water she was now sitting in. "Fluttershy! That is … not what they mean … when they say "milk-bath!"

"True, but are you really complaining?"

Rarity giggled like an easily-amused child. "No, I guess not. Can … I … "

"You want more, don't you?" Fluttershy asked confidently. "It's okay. No need to be embarrassed." Not that Rarity would be while hypnotized, but Fluttershy felt the need to say it anyway. "But before we do that..." Fluttershy raised her hands up, turned them over to point the wrist-barbs down, then slammed the barbs into Rarity's breasts, injecting the aphrodisiac directly into an erogenous zone. Rarity trilled and shook as ounces of the drug were put directly in her bloodstream. The original snake-woman that started this thing off only put a few milliliters into Fluttershy during their encounter.

"OOOH YEEES!" Rarity screamed. "YES! OH, OH!"

Fluttershy could sense Rarity was close. She licked her lips in anticipation, as once Rarity had been sufficiently pleasured, Fluttershy was going to swallow her and convert her the same way as Rainbow Dash. A quid pro quo. Fluttershy gave Rarity some of the best pleasure she ever had, Fluttershy got to have her own pleasure by swallowing Rarity whole. Seemed like a fair trade to Fluttershy!

Fluttershy was still injecting Rarity, smiling to herself at thought of eating her, when she was startled by a sound like a cannon going off.

"FLUTTERSHY!" A masculine voice roared that Fluttershy recognized as Shining Armor. "We know you have Rarity in there! Come out with her unharmed, preferably not turned into a snake, and with your arms and tail where we can see them, and we won't have to get nasty."

Fluttershy winced and froze, stopping the flow of aphrodisiac from her barbs.

Rarity whined, oblivious. "Nooo! Why'd you stop!?"

"I'm sorry, Rarity." Fluttershy said, curling her tail around Rarity and lifting her out of the tub. She picked up Rarity's dress and stuffed it on Rarity like a toy doll.

"Fluttershy!" Shining shouted.

"I'm coming out!" Fluttershy shouted back, swinging the door open and slithering out with her hands raised. "I have Rarity!" Fluttershy bit her lip. Shining Armor had royal guardsmen stationed in a perimeter around her house. Applejack, Twilight, and Pinkie were behind Shining Armor.

"I'm putting her down, okay?" Fluttershy said, making sure her hands were visible as she lowered Rarity to the ground.

Shining Armor stared oddly.

"What?"

"You, um, you put Rarity's dress on her upside-down." Shining said. Fluttershy looked at Rarity, and she had indeed put Rarity's dress upside-down, with the top binding Rarity's legs together, while the skirt that was supposed to give her legs motion was flapping around her torso, exposing far more of her bust than was publicly decent.

"Well … I didn't take a class in "Quick-Dressing Your Hypnotized Thrall" at my college." Fluttershy mumbled.

"Come on." Shining guided Rarity towards Twilight. "You take her back to the boutique, and than we'll deal with -"

Shining Armor turned back to Fluttershy, only to meet with a tornado of dirt. Shining raised his arm to shield himself, only barely catching the rear end of Fluttershy's tail as she tunneled through the dirt like a drilling machine. When she was done, Shining Armor and his men surrounded the pit she left behind.

Shining stared down the pit. "So ..." He looked at his troops. "I don't suppose anyone thought to bring a smoke grenade?"

"Er, no, sir. Your sister's letter only said that she could hypnotize, so we brought protective eye wear. But no smoke grenades. Cause, you know … Twilight didn't mention any burrowing."

Shining Armor sighed and shook his head. "Of course not." He walked away from the hole and raised his hand. "Spread around town! Set up a perimeter. See if we can catch her."

Twilight and Applejack kept a hold on Rarity, driving her back into the boutique and setting her in a chair.

"Rarity?" Twilight asked. Rarity heard her name, but the hypnosis had her thoroughly thwacked.

Rarity reached her hand out. "Twilight … where did all the colors go?"

"Colors?"

"She must be talking about the hypnosis." Cadence said.

"I want more of the pretty colors ..." Rarity muttered, going limp against the chair like a ragdoll.

"I'll get to work. Maybe I can come up with something before it wears off this time." Blue energy swirled in Cadence's hands.

"But if you're really serious about wanting more colors, I'm sure Rainbow Dash would be happy to do it!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Pinkie, we're not doing that." Twilight said sternly, but Pinkie was already cartwheeling up the stairs.

"That's not right." Pinkie said from upstairs.

"What's not right?"

Pinkie came back down. "Rainbow Dash isn't up there."

That made Twilight worry. "That's really not right. Pinkie, I thought you told to lock the door to keep Dash inside?"

"I did! The door was open!"

"So ... what, she just ... picked the lock with her tail or something?"

"Yeah, sure looks that way." Applejack nodded. "Look!" She pointed at the window. Everyone crowded the window just in time to see Rainbow Dash tearing through the ground, exactly the way Fluttershy escaped them.

"RAINBOW DASH! NO!"

Everyone rushed outside to stop her, but by the time they got out the door, Rainbow Dash was already gone.

"Aaaugh!" Twilight screamed, putting her hands on her head in stress. "Darn it."

Rarity stepped out, sorely rubbing her head. "Ooh, my head … what's going on?"

Fluttershy burst out of the ground in some woods away from her house. She rested her hand against a tree, breathing heavily. The snake tail and its muscles had shredded through the dirt like a rabid wolverine let loose on paper, so fast from point A to point B that the lack of oxygen underground wasn't going to be a problem. But that didn't mean Fluttershy couldn't appreciate the fresh air any less.

There was a crack nearby in the forest.

"Who's there?" Fluttershy shouted, regressing back to her shy and fearful state, forgetting she now had a tail that could crush bones. "I'll warn you, I once judo-kicked a bear!"

Actually, she had been doing chiropractic treatment on the bear. But she figured that the techniques involved in a judo-kick couldn't be too different, could they? That was ignoring the issue that she no legs to kick with.

There was another crack, this one much closer.

"OKAY!" Fluttershy shouted. "I admit, I was treating him!"

The ground burst, startling Fluttershy. Out came Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash saw Fluttershy and could instantly tell Fluttershy was scared. Rainbow Dash put her hands on Fluttershy's shoulders to calm her. "Fluttershy! Fluttershy, it's me!"

Fluttershy stopped shivering. "Oh. Hello, Rainbow Dash."

"Yeah, hi." Dash said. "I just ..." Rainbow Dash groaned. "Oh, I'm so hungry, Fluttershy … I need something inside me."

"Is that so?" Fluttershy asked wisely.

"Yes!" Dash pulled away from Fluttershy and clutched at her stomach. "I mean, I tried to hypnotize Pinkie Pie and swallow her, but Twilight stopped me and … and I just feel so empty, like I haven't eaten in days!"

Fluttershy put a hand on Rainbow Dash's cheek. "I know, Rainbow Dash, I know." Fluttershy spoke motherly.

Dash groaned again. "The girls don't understand … they don't get it... they don't feel this empty. So I went looking for you. I thought … maybe you could help me."

Fluttershy affectionately patted Dash's cheek like a mother assuring their child. "You came to the right place." Feeling affectionate, Fluttershy kissed Dash on the lips. "I'll help you. We'll go into town. We'll find someone cute and you can eat them right up ..."

"Thank you …"

Fluttershy moved away from the tree. "Come on. I have the perfect idea for someone you can eat without Shining Armor or Twilight rudely interrupting us ..."

In the Ponyville market, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash had dug multiple holes, just large enough to poke their tails through and small enough they looked inconspicuous for spying on the vendors. She remembered a freckly, bespectacled vendor who Rarity had charmed for lowered prices. Given how easily Rarity got him, Fluttershy was sure he wouldn't mind some of her's and Dash's … tender wrappings.

"There he is." Fluttershy said, watching the vendor exit his stall. Fluttershy poked the tip of her tail out from a hole and rattled it to attract his attention.

"Hmm?" He noticed. He looked around as if wanting to find a guard. "Snake! Can anyone help? There's a snake loose!" But everyone else in the market was too far away to hear him. He gulped. "Well, I guess it's up to me to remove this … dangerous … probably poisonous snake before it hurts someone."

Fluttershy giggled. If only he knew.

The vendor shook. He reached his hand out and hesitantly bent over to grab the tail. Fluttershy pulled it into the ground.

"Whew!" The vendor wiped his forehead, relieved he didn't have to deal with the snake. Until Fluttershy tore through the ground to poke her tail out in a different spot.

"Huh?" The vendor bent down to grab it, but Fluttershy sunk it into the earth again. Then she popped out back in a different location. He promptly went after it again and she pulled it back down. It went on like a game of whack-a-mole, the vendor not realizing the tail was popping in spots further away from the market, luring him away from potential witnesses.

Once he was far enough away, Fluttershy unearthed more than just the tip of her tail and lassoed it around him. She pulled him down under the dirt, tunneled her way back to the forest, then burst out with him in her grasp and Rainbow Dash next to her.

"Aaah!" The vendor screamed. "Please don't eat me, whatever you are!"

"We're not going to eat you." Fluttershy said sweetly.

Dash was confused. "We're not?" Fluttershy bumped her elbow into Dash's shoulder. "Ooooh. I mean … we're not!" Dash winked to show she caught on to Fluttershy's intent.

"You're not?" The vendor asked.

"Nooo!" Fluttershy lied, crossing her arms under her breasts. "We're going to make you feel good. Isn't that right, Rainbow Dash?" Fluttershy relaxed her coils on him, giving Rainbow Dash a look. Dash lifted her tail up and coiled it around him, interlocking her tail with Fluttershy's. They both started to throw loops around his legs and arms and being to massage him. He blushed. Rainbow Dash became envious of him, as she imagined a message with two tails must have felt better than just one.

"This is nice ..." The vendor shyly muttered.

"Isn't it?" Fluttershy said sweetly. She started her hypnosis.

The vendor noticed. "Hey. What's wrong with your … eyes?" The vendor lost his train of thought, looking into the pretty colors.

"You were saying something was wrong with my eyes?" Fluttershy asked him mischievously.

"N-no. I don't know what I was thinking ..."

"Hey!" Dash objected, not wanting to be reduced to Fluttershy's side-kick. "Let me hypnotize him!" She wiggled her head into his field of view and activated her own hypnosis, which was the same color as her hair.

"Oh, I think that might overwhelm him!" Fluttershy exclaimed in worry as his eyes shift back and forth between Fluttershy's and Rainbow's colors. "Idea! We each take one eye ..." Fluttershy moved to the side, focusing her attention on just his right eye, while Dash did the same thing to his left. It seemed successful, as one of his eyes reflected Rainbow's with the other reflecting Fluttershy's. He moaned a little as the double-dose of hypnosis made him feel good.

Fluttershy moved towards him, putting her hand on his head and leaning him forward into her breasts. Dash, blindly following Fluttershy's lead and moving herself behind him, leaning forward and pressing the back of his head into her breasts, connecting the ends of her breasts with the ends of Fluttershy's. Fluttershy pushed his head up so he could keep staring at their eyes while still enjoying their chests.

"I wonder if he wants a little ... milk-shower." Fluttershy said as they hypnotized him further.

Rainbow Dash didn't know what Fluttershy meant. "Milk-shower? What do you mean, milk – oh yeah. Now I remember." Rainbow Dash blushed at the resurfaced memory.

Fluttershy, not breaking hypnosis with their lucky victim, raised her eyebrow at Rainbow Dash. "Rainbow Dash, aren't you lactating too?"

"No." Dash self-consciously grabbed at her breasts. "I take that back. Yes."

"Mmm … I don't suppose you'd mind a milk-flavored snack?" Fluttershy asked.

Catching onto her meaning, Dash's jaw practically dropped. Turning into a snake-woman had made Fluttershy really kinky. "Not at all!"

"Okay. Mister?" Fluttershy spoke to him. "Would you mind playing a little game with us?"

"Game?" He asked.

"Yes. We're going to spritz you with milk, and you're going to try to drink as much of it as you can." Fluttershy smirked at Dash. "Not that that will be much."

"We'll want to take these off." Fluttershy said, taking off his glasses and sliding them into his pocket.

She and Rainbow rose up and curled their hands around their breasts. They dug their fingers in, forcing the milk out in streams. Their thrall bobbed his head back and forth to catch it, but of course, there was no way he could react fast enough to prevent it from drenching his face and shirt.

"O-okay." Fluttershy moaned, having accidentally pleasured herself by squeezing too firmly. "I like doing that, but now I'm missing the feeling of a hungry pair of lips, gently suckling me ..." Fluttershy smiled sideways at him.

"Well, I never experienced direct suckling to start with, so ..." Dash said, looking uncertainly at Fluttershy. Fluttershy just smiled back with a raised eyebrow.

So very kinky.

Fluttershy and Dash, with big, perverted smiles on their faces, adjusting their-selves to get closer to him. Fluttershy gently slid her breast into his mouth, then Dash smashed into the both them, connecting her breast to Fluttershy's and rolling, kneading, squishing their breasts until their extremely lucky victim had the tips of both of their breasts in his mouth. He suckled strongly, trying to draw as much of their delicious milk out as he could. Dash and Fluttershy moaned, the release of pressure bringing them great pleasure and relaxation.

"Okay ..." Fluttershy pulled, tapping Dash on the shoulder. "This is nice, but I think we've stuffed him plenty and its time we dealt with you." Dash nodded. Fluttershy uncurled her tail from the vendor, leaving so that he was exclusively in Dash's coils. Dash lifted him into the air and started to open her mouth.

"Oh!" Fluttershy jumped, grabbing Dash's cheeks. "Here, let me help you ..." she kneaded Dash's jaw to help stretch it out.

"Mm." Dash jerked, rubbing her cheeks. "Mildly uncomfortable ..."

"Trust me." Fluttershy said. "Without my help, it would have been much worse."

Rainbow Dash resumed what she was doing, balancing the vendor and sliding him right into her mouth. A tear came from Rainbow Dash's eyes as she was overwhelmed by pleasure unlike anything she had ever felt, making their previous experimentation seemed lackluster in comparison. Dash tilted her head backwards, throwing the vendor down her throat. He didn't go in all the way, so Dash sucked him down the rest of the way like a noodle.

"Hhaaaaa ..." Dash moaned after swallowing. Like Fluttershy, the body of the swallowed skipped the human part, going straight for the pod. The milk on his body made him quickly slide down her stomach in ways that were oh-so-satisfying. "Hey, don't you need to go eat someone, too?"

"I'll be fine." Fluttershy said. "I think if I can get you a meal, I can do the same for myself."

"You know ..." Dash said, shaking her hips as she felt her meal travel through her body. "Feeling someone squirm around my intestines should probably not feel this sexy."

"Mh-hmm."

Fluttershy felt good she had helped her friend, but watching Rainbow Dash enjoy herself brought to mind a worrying thought. After Fluttershy had swallowed and converted Rainbow Dash, that had doubled the snakes in the area from one to two … and if she eat and converted someone else, that would double from it two to four, and then that four would double to eight, to sixteen and it would just keep going. And sooner or later, there would be more people-eating snakes than there were people to be eaten. How would they fix it?

Fluttershy eyed Dash's stomach pod. The simplest way that occurred to her was to just … have Dash not convert him. But that raised other issues. She didn't want him to die from starvation. Did the green liquid have nutrients enough to keep him fed? Would she have to pour her milk down Dash to feed her internal prisoner? These thoughts were brushed off when Rainbow Dash hugged her, giving a bizarre jolt of pleasure.

"Thank you so much for helping me, Fluttershy." Dash said. "That empty feeling was just so awful ..."

"Mm-hmm." Fluttershy nodded, still worrying about their new eating habits. Dash curled around her and she felt little tingles from Dash's scales sliding against hers.

"Rainbow Dash, does it … feel good to rub your scales against mine?"

"Yeah." Dash said with a blush. "Does it feel good to you?"

"Yes ..."

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy proceed to start coiling and curling around each, rubbing their scales together.

"Oooh ..." Fluttershy exhaled, lowering her body down to the ground, allowing Dash to pin her while they wrapped around each other. "These scales are so sensitive …"

"Mmm ..." Dash undulated against Fluttershy, intertwining her fingers with Fluttershy's. "You know something, Fluttershy? I've heard of cuddlesex … but this is ridiculous." Fluttershy's giggles were interrupted by a deep male voice and the crunch of footsteps on crisp leaves.

"-out and search the area. Maybe we can find them."

"CAPTAIN!" A Royal Guard appeared on a nearby log. "We've found them!" Fluttershy and Dash grimaced as Shining, Twilight, guards, and the rest of the gang all appeared.

"Excuse you!" Fluttershy growled, lifting Rainbow Dash off and raising up. "We were in the middle of something private!"

"Uh-huh." Shining Armor nodded, holding his spear out. "As informative as it might be to let you do your little … snake … sex … thing."

"Sure you don't want to watch?" Rainbow Dash asked teasingly. Shining blushed.

Fluttershy lifted her tail up and swing it around, knocking Shining's men down like bowling pins and wrapping both Shining and Cadence up in her tail. She brought Shining and Cadence towards her, growled at them, then jabbed one of her wrist-barbs into both their shoulders. They moaned from the aphrodisiac effects.

"Shining Armor!" Twilight shouted. "Come on! Fight it!"

"I WOULD, Twiley, but I can't cast a spell with her restricting my arms!"

Rainbow Dash surveyed the area. With Fluttershy having knocked down Shining's men, she needed to assess who was the next biggest threat. Twilight, no contest. But Rainbow Dash saw that Pinkie was closer to her and knew Twilight wouldn't risk using her magic if there was a chance she could hurt Pinkie …

Rainbow Dash wrapped her tail around Pinkie Pie and brought her close.

"Pinkie!" Twilight shouted.

Rainbow Dash finagled Pinkie where Twilight couldn't use her magic without possibly hitting Pinkie.

"I can't wait to taste the rest of you ..." Rainbow Dash said lecherously, starting her hypnosis. "You tasted so much like sweets the first time."

"Oh no you don't!" Pinkie said. She somehow escaped Rainbow's coils the way a magician escapes from their box. She pulled out a pink handheld mirror and held it in front of Rainbow Dash's face, bouncing her hypnosis back at her.

"AAAAAAH!" Rainbow Dash screamed in pain. Clutching at her head in pain, she angrily slammed her Pinkie Pie into a nearby tree. Groaning and rubbing her head, Rainbow Dash turned tail and burrowed away.

"Rainbow Dash!?" Fluttershy shouted. Unsticking her barbs from Shining and Cadence, Fluttershy dropped them and went after Rainbow Dash in concern. "Rainbow Dash!" She went into the hole Rainbow Dash made.

"Wow!" Pinkie Pie said. "Did you see the way they move through the dirt? They're like mermaids in water, but with dirt! Dirt mermaids! Dirtmaids!"

"Pinkie Pie!" Twilight shouted, rushing towards Pinkie to make sure she was okay. "Are you all right? Where did you get that mirror?"

"Oh. Well, after the last time Rainbow Dash tried to hypnotize me, I decided to keep it on me as an anti-hypnosis device if she did it again!" Pinkie looked at Dash's escape hole. "I guess it worked, huh?"

Twilight looked towards Shining Armor and Cadence. "Are you two okay?"

"Yeah." Shining said, helping Cadence up and holding her hands. "But, um, spikes Fluttershy stabbed us with are having an effect on us, so we're gonna … go over there." Shining led Cadence away, leering at his wife lustfully.

"Okay, um, ew." Twilight spat. She knew Cadence and Shining Armor were consenting, married adults who were probably going to have sex, but that didn't mean she had to like it. She refocused her attention on Pinkie. She took the mirror from Pinkie's hand and admired it, smiling.

"Wut'cha ya thinkin', Twi?" Applejack asked.

"Pinkie Pie, you're a genius!" Twilight said.

"No I'm not, I'm a chicken!" Pinkie chirped. "Wait. I think I did that joke already."

"With this …" Twilight said, holding the mirror up high like a sacred artifact. "We're going to do what we do best!"

Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Rarity scratched their heads.

"Make dresses?" Rarity asked.

"No."

"Have harrowing experiences that make us realize important things about friendship?" Pinkie asked.

"No!"

"Create a mess which needs our other friends or Princess Celestia to come fix?" Applejack added.

"NO!" Twilight shouted. She waved the mirror around. "We're going to cure Fluttershy! We're going to lay a trap."

There was a pause.

"Twilight, that's not what we're best at!" Pinkie complained. Twilight face-palmed.

Author's Notes for "I've Heard of Cuddlesex, But This Is Ridiculous"

TWO sex scenes! Because Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash doing kinky things with milk is just, like, so super important to the plot.

Disclaimer: The above sentence contains sarcasm.

The vendor Fluttershy goes after and gives to Rainbow Dash for eating is the same as the one with the glasses in "Putting Your Hoof Down." I figured he'd make a good victim with the whole "nerd stereotype" angle going on, so Fluttershy and Dash could seduce him easily.

I was going to give Fluttershy a mouth-tentacle that poured blue liquid instead of green, and have her pour it and the milk into Rarity at the same time. But I decided not to bother with it.

I had originally planned to make this story take place in the same universe as "A Poison Most Intimate." Hence why SHining Armor and Cadence were brought in. If this was part of the Poison series, Shining and Cadence would have prior experience dealing with mind-affecting monsters.

However, I changed my mind about that for one reason ... if this WERE in the Poison series, Rarity would get ALL UP in Fluttershy's grill for getting intimate with Rainbow Dash.

Like, borderline murder levels of possessiveness.

"Dirtmaids." Coming soon to Sy-Fy network.

Special Note to reader FineChyna.

Was there too much lactation in this chapter? I wanted to a little bit of it, like a side-dish to the main course, but your review on last chapter has me worried it was too much.