Chapter 10- Denial

"I have gotten a lot better though haven't I Lessa?" Gohan asked as me and him were throwing punch after punch, neither of us landing a hit.

"Well kid, you want some praise, you gotta earn it"

"Okay" He said cheerfully and suddenly disappeared before grabbing one of my legs and swinging me round and round. Just before my stomach threatened to bring up my lunch, he released me, promising me a full speed flight into the next mountain.

I waited till my head stopped spinning and forced my ki sideways, taking me out of my course of the mountain. But apparently Gohan wasn't done and before I had time to formulate a counter attack he slammed his elbow into my stomach; knocking me flat out on the dirt.

"Alright kid, you get your praise. You're a lot better than I thought. You happy now?"

"Yes Lessa" And Gohan continued to smile so sweetly it was sickening.

"Piccolo, beat the crap out of him will you"

"Sure thing Princess" I heard him stifle back a laugh.

"And you can stop calling me Princess unless you want me to kick you where it hurts"

"You have to catch me for that"

"I'm sure it won't be hard"

"Are you referring to something else now" I rolled my eyes.

"What gives you that idea?"

"Maybe I'll tell you later"

"You wish" Gohan watched our banter bemusedly. Being five, he had no idea of the sexual references behind our words, but we were getting on with each other; and that seemed to make the kid more happy than anything else.

Obviously I'd created a monster, everytime night hit and Gohan fell asleep, Piccolo was ready for sex like nothing else. He wasn't even worried about Gohan waking up and catching us either. In fact the thrill seemed to turn him on even more.

Not that I had any complaints. He was very good at what he did, and we were very good at denying any feelings that weren't purely sexual.

The rules had been laid out. It was mutual gain. And a way of dealing with sexual frustration. Anything else had no bearing on it. Even if we did care for each other. Once the year was up, we'd defeat the saiyans, and I'd be on my way.

There was nothing else to it.

"Lessa? You gonna come out of dreamland and eat something or what?"

"Huh?" I spied the steaming fish that were in Piccolo's hands.

"Christ, how long was I out?" Piccolo snapped one of the fish in half, sucking up the juices and crunching on the spine before handing me the mangled remains.

"About an hour" There was another snap as some poor fish lost all feeling in its body. Then again, it was hopefully already dead. I had a policy against eating living fish.

"Sorry about that, guess I was more tired than I thought" My cheeks went red as some of the fish blood dripped out of Piccolo's mouth.

"Mr Piccolo, could you help me please"

"Why"

"I fell in the river and can't get out" Piccolo tossed aside the fish he was chewing and sighed.

"For gods sake, its not even that deep" I closed my eyes again, listening as the sand crunched under his shoes as he trudged over to the river. I heard a loud splash as Gohan was lifted from the water and then a whistle of the air and a groan as Gohan was hurled into some rocks.

"I told you kid, you need to learn to do things for yourself" I smiled. Same old Piccolo.

Trust him to help him out and then bruise him for his trouble.

The wood crackled as the flames licked heavily at the bark, spitting out pieces of charred tree every now and then when someone least expected it. It was silent otherwise, sleep descending heavily in the air.

Even I was tired for once, yawning every five minutes. Causing a chain reaction within Gohan and Lessa.

"Mr Piccolo?"

"Yes Gohan?"

"You know, you don't need to fight my dad anymore when we defeat the saiyans right?" As I brooded silently, Gohan took confidence from it.

"Cause you've changed. Your not the mean old Piccolo you used to be" He nodded to himself.

Anger welled up inside me. How could he say I wasn't mean anymore. I still beat him up every day. And I was still determined to convince myself I would take over this planet when the saiyans were gone. How dare this little pipsqueak try and tell me any different.

"Lessa's like my auntie now and your like my big green uncle mr Piccolo" The word uncle was to much. Confused feelings weren't something I wanted when this was over. I refused to get attached.

"Shut up Gohan" I roared. "Be quiet and go to sleep. Stop entertaining yourself with such stupid ideas" Gohan was startled but obediently did as I said and rolled away from me, shielding his tears from my angry eyes.

Across from me Lessa glared disapprovingly.

"That was harsh Piccolo. He only spoke the truth. Why don't you stop denying it to yourself and grow up. Cause even I can tell you've changed since I met you"

She gave me one last glare before turning away from me and curling up for sleep.

Was I really that wrong?

"Look kid, you've mastered your close combat skills, I think its about time you did the same with ki attacks" Piccolo was up early this morning, barking out orders to Gohan like last night had never happened. Gohan seemed all too happy to forget it; I wouldn't though. I'd sat on this same rock for three hours straight, arms folded and stomach grumbling. I refused to eat any food that came from Piccolo's hands.

He'd been too cruel last night.

It was a little later before Gohan was beat down. Piccolo was faster at throwing ki than he was with his punches, and Gohan didn't stand a chance of dodging them.

Gohan wasn't very good at throwing them either. He didn't seem to want to attack his precious Piccolo.

Gohan was on the edge of a cliff, panting on his knees as Piccolo watched him with unmerciful eyes.

"Lessa, why don't you jump in" Piccolo didn't look at me as he said, but there was unspoken words in his eyes.

I wasn't going to do this for him.

'That's right, just keep telling yourself your doing it for the kid even though your not'

I got up, and stalked slowly towards the kid before stopping five metres away from him. He turned his puppy dog eyes on me and one of the broken pieces I had left turned to stone.

It wasn't him I saw, it was Marissa.

I flew at him, ramming him of the cliff. He clung on with one chubby hand and before I could do anything; I was picked up and thrown away. Piccolo stepped in, placing his brown boot on Gohan's hand.

The same way you would stub a cigarette in the ground was the way Piccolo treated his hand. Loosening and loosening until it broke free and the kid free-falled it down the mountain side.

Dust filled the breeze as Gohan started trying to scrabble his way back up. Now it was Piccolo's turn to glare at me.

"Piccolo..please just help this one time..i can't get up the mountain" Gohan whined. I'd forgotten the kid couldn't fly yet.

"You never have to help me again…Piccolo!"

Piccolo sighed deeply.

"He's never gonna get stronger like this. He'll never be able to face the saiyans. All these months have been wasted.

There's no hope anymore. Humanity is over" Piccolo slumped down onto the ground, his head between his hands.

I tilted my head.

"Wow Piccolo, never thought you'd be the one to give up like this. It's not over til its over. You of all people should know that… I heard about the battle you had with Goku. No matter how lost it seemed, you never gave up until it was truly over. I was right, you have changed.

Perhaps not for the good. I thought you were better than this" He looked up, those piercing black eyes like daggers.

"I am better than this. But the kid is like a lost cause"

"Many things are a lost cause Piccolo, but if we gave up on those lost causes some of us wouldn't be here today"

"You sound like you have experience of that"

I scuffed my boots in the sand, watching the birds in the sky. Those things looked free, but they were caged too. There was a certain height of which they could go, and no further.

"Sadly Piccolo, my whole life was a lost cause until just over a year ago" It was those words that made me realize something.

I'd missed my seventeenth birthday.

Yet I felt nothing.

Birthdays were just the marking of another year you'd lived. The day you were brought into the world.

For most it was a celebration, for me a curse.

Birthdays always surprised me. They meant I had somehow survived another year.

"Why do you never speak of your past?"

"There is nothing to speak of"

"Then we have something in common"

"What's that then"

"We're both in denial"