A/N Finally made it, the last chapter, here we go :) thanks to all who have stayed with me since the start, offering suggestions, advice, requests and of course your thoughts and feelings on this story YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! :D I hoped you've enjoyed my OC and how I've written our much-loved characters.
MAY I GRAB YOUR ATTENTION? I plan to make a prequel to this as I have said many thousands of time and your eyes are most likely bleeding from it :P but I hope you don't cringe when I mention the word 'prequel' its funny, technically the one I'm writing now was supposed to go up first but hey it could go bad being a prequel or not :P so I'm basically doing my version of what went down when they first came to Earth but set in Prime but with certain elements of bayverse such as the characters Sam, Lennox, Locations etc. so it will be basically how Ellen met Optimus, (not little distractions for the few who have read that little short thing :P) some of it will most likely be a continuity error such as when and where things occurred and certain references I've made in this story.
so I'll a small description, Bumblebee has been on Earth for two years naturally to scout, observing human behavior, locating Energon for confirmation that the planet is indeed a potential target, he finds that if he stays on the streets or rural areas just outside the cities has roused the local authorities, so with no place to go Bumblebee decides to live under ownership as an inanimate vehicle to one Sam Witwicky who is 'loosely' babysitting a 5-year-old Ellen to keep a low profile until he gets contact to the other Autobots for confirmation to land on Earth before the Decepticons and a so-called weapon that is apparently able to topple mountains...
yeah that's the idea behind it anyway, but it all goes from there of course I'll be updating my other story of spin offs that I've been asked to update soon numerous times so I better get to that as well :) but I hope you guys will check it out maybe but I just like to write either way :)
Epilogue
Optimus took his place on the edge of the well yet again as a mixture of events had unfolded moments before.
"Dad?" Ellen called with hesitant fear. He offered his hand as he lifted her up to the platform, they exchanged stares as he placed a hand under her chin, she let her head droop as she shut her optics painfully, "I-I, don't want you to go." She whispered.
"Ellen." he said. "We can start a new, a society of equality without given stations or the need of a caste system, our freedom to choose. The new generation I hope would never need witness centuries of war but instead will learn of what occurred here, the endless, battles that occurred here, and on Earth."
"I know, but still…" she shook her head, "To start life from death? It's like the same thing happening all over again."
"Who ever said that I would die?" he said.
"How can you be so calm saying that? You don't know what could happen, you could be deprived from existence or-or…I don't know! You say one thing, give the Allspark back to the core but you can't guarantee what will happen to you." she hollered. "What if, you get trapped, l-like me? Never to exist again...I just can't, say, 'yes, I believe you.'"
"And what of trust? Do you trust me?" He said.
"I-I do, a-and your usually right about these things but..." She clenched her fists, "Damn it…I don't want to say that I can't this time but…"
"Be aware of your words." He mock scolded. "I will see you again, this is not goodbye, never goodbye."
She looked to around her as she slightly shook her head, "I…It's not…you should know, because I was nearly-"
A sudden touch, his helm against hers, and in full exposure to his optics, his royal blue optics that she couldn't even look past to escape, those same optics that glowed in the night and comforted her, and the same optics she knew were always watching, scolding, praising, be it during good and bad days. But particularly now, they looked, peaceful as the day he emerged from the well. "Though you argue against this, I will still apologize for any unnecessary distress I have placed on you." he said warmly.
She found herself frozen.
"Our first meeting my thoughts of you were only neutral, you were part of a race I felt responsible to protect from our hostile others. I, had become short-sighted of the changes that War had left on me, we knew of nothing else for thousands of years. All you expressed was that you needed to get home, to wait for your father you were very persistent, so I promised you that I would take you home after we found you and Sam somewhere safe and stopped Megatron. And you were lured into the idea."
Still frozen from movement she spoke in a similar manner. "I-I don't think I had a good grasp on stranger danger back then." she said breathlessly.
"But be it ever get you into peril or not, as our journey continued towards the Decepticons, and my constant struggle to focus on that objective I was captivated by your inquisitive nature, something that comes easily when your young, something that we were missing after thousands of years, even Bumblebee had lost that sense after a couple of centuries of exposure and focused entirely on our fight, There was nothing else to focus on...at the time, or beyond that. Our race was all about discovery and knowledge, but instead it turned into control of what you were allowed to know and what never to know. From that it stirred eventual questions, confrontation, revolution…lost friendship."
"..."
"When you became, the only one left of your family unit, you became petrified, they were not there, despite your lack of understanding then, you seemed to be aware that you were alone, with the mention of 'government officials' and to go with someone else, you hid behind my pedes and pleaded me to help. It could have been that you did not know any better that it could have been for the better, but you did not know this. However I did, yet I still wished to 'help' you. my spark raced, but after a long passing of distress and debate, I said...'I will take her.' …the moment I made that choice without a second thought, the moment I did, I thought of what could happen, what could go wrong, what I could do wrong. But I watched you grow into what you are, into what you will be." He lifted her chin. "And that, may be anything."
Ellen wiped her face, "What I am? Every therapists dream." She said with a shaky tone.
"And a fine embodiment of life."
she dipped her optics, "Do…you really think, that I'd see you again? I know I'm only asking out of denial, but I need something." she asked.
"Do not be so critical of yourself, We shall, be it in spirit or another taken form, you may not recognise me, but have more trust in yourself, in the possibilities, but in knowing you, with evidence as well, but you will know." He said as he tapped his torso, "As I go forth now, you will start your own life, but part of you will come with me my knowledge of you and Earth will be a part of us, as a part of me shall leave with you." she watched him with sad optics, "I know sometimes you felt I have been unfair and harsh. But I hope you see that I had taught you well, because I cared."
"I-I know...and I-I will keep an eye out." she said weakly wiping her optics. "I'm looking out for a sad-looking nerd right?"
He smiled lightly, "Silly girl." He turned to look over the entrance to the core as her face fell.
"I love you." she said.
His face turned slightly serious, "And I love you. more than I can ever express through words, through actions, or over a lifetime. But I hope I have tried."
Her optics widened as she grinded her jaw as she placed hands around her helm, "Why is it...with Dads, they have to wait for the last dire s-second to say something like that?"
"They just, do not know what to say." He explained lightly smiling at her.
"Then, our races really aren't that different." She added in no particular tone.
He nodded, "Behave appropriately for Ratchet."
"I'll…try." She said rubbing her optics.
He nodded to her as she took a grab for his hand, Ratchet approached offering a hand to help her down and to help the situation, "Come down." he said gently with hints of frustration, confusion in his voice.
She stood between them both as she turned fearful, "It's alright." Optimus told her as she backed up slowly, her fingers slipped out of touch with his as Ratchet helped her down, she joined the group as Ratchet gave a nod to him.
"I'll take care of her." He told him.
"You always have in my absence old friend, despite your best efforts to deny it so." He replied offering his hand as he shook it, one more time.
Ratchet stepped back looking to behind him to watch her where she went, and she stood at the front just as she noticed Knockout beside her. "Hey." He said casually looking her over. "You know, I'm trained in understanding ones mentality...you want to talk about it?" he offered in a less than approachable manner.
She just raised an eyebrow sceptically but took it in to everything else and turned to Ratchet, "Erm, th-that's Knockout." She said to him.
He looked him over, "Yes."
Again sorrow, confusion and bitter-sweet feelings were felt as Optimus stood before them in a more relieved and certain state. "We can't help you?" Bee then said. "What about what Arcee said, Vector Sigma, it can restore the Matrix, maybe it will separate the Allspark in doing so."
"No Bumblebee, because the Matrix must now be relinquished to the Allspark, it cannot be restored or passed down to another. But while this may very well mark the end of the age of Primes, leadership can be earned with or without the Matrix. And in my view you have each acted as a Prime." Optimus said as the group took this in.
"Well, I've never really had the best role models." Knockout said sheepishly.
"As even Megatron has demonstrated on this day, every sentient being possess the capacity for change." Optimus continues as he activates his jet pack looking them over once more, "I ask only this of you fellow Autobots; keep fighting the noblest of fights."
"I'll miss you..." Ellen thought subconciously stepping forward in doing so.
"You can count on us to keep the peace." Bee said.
Optimus smiled at them as he turned to the Well and with his last request, he takes off into the sky then dives back down into the well as the group were filled with mixed emotion. Ellen locked her fingers together as her hands shook and she made stuttered breathing sounds, "N-No…" she said meekly shutting her optics.
Ratchet looked at her, her legs shook and she was almost in a state of panic yet again, to avoid what he had witnessed from her before he cupped a hand around her linked hands as she got spooked from the motion. "Easy." He told her moving closer to her side. "We all share the same thoughts at this point."
She looked at her hands as she slowly calmed down to the hand on top of them, then looking to the Well she just stared her optics wincing, as they all waited.
Optimus' thoughts carried through. "Above all do not lament my absence, for in my spark I know that this is not the end."
And the waiting, turned to a sudden bursting sound, Ellen snapped her head down to that sound, the sound of the end...which turned to a sound of humming, soft at first as it built up like a stampede, coming from the well, and as quick and sudden as death can be, life came just as fast, as thousands of sparks burst from the well leaving almost star-dust light behind them as they shot to the sky in many colours, to find there place and emerge self-aware of their new surroundings, perhaps not the most appropriate image for their first glimpse on their new world, but like them, Cybertron would emerge a new with their joint efforts.
As they watched all these indirected sparks find their way, one red spark diverted from the path that the rest followed and instead brought itself forward as it seemed to acknowledge the group.
"But merely a new beginning, simply put another transformation."
"Ratchet…" Ellen said pointing a subtle finger upwards to the single spark seemingly watching them before leaving, ascending high as it darted across the planet, her optics darted but had already lost sight of it as she turned to the medic, "do, you think?"
"I would not dismiss it at least." he said smiling. "It has been said that Optimus Prime, one of the thirteen chose to be reborn to be a part of the second generation to observe society, I assumed It was an appropriate designation, given his nobility and ability to bring many Cybertronians together in crisis, but perhaps he was reborn and revealed his identity in Orion Pax many years later, without no recollection of his previous life. Perhaps history is repeating himself, in a different form." He shrugged, "Of course, that's just a rumour from old text. But then again, not all rumour should be brushed aside."
"If true...When do you think he might emerge?" she asked focused on that little story.
"Who knows." She dipped her head, "What is it?"
"If he did come back...What if…what if he doesn't know who I am?"
"He took with him all that he had learned, this new generation will know of what occurred here, the bots who aided this. Just as we are born with the knowledge to transform passed on through Amalgamous Prime. Well we'll just have to see won't we."
she shrugged, "Yeah..."
Ellen's POV
It happened many times, his brink of death, but this one was to ensure life. But I still feel that sadness, he said he'd be with me, and he'd see me again but…y-you know a big guy like him is hard to not miss. E-Even with a presence, his physical presence will be what I miss most and our, talks. And yes I started to cry, I cried into my fist at first…until I felt Ratchets hand around my shoulder who sadly smiled at me and so I laid my head against him, I didn't want to, I didn't want to touch or be touched by anyone, but, I am so glad he's here. I continued to cry, softly into his chassis, I'm not alone…maybe I am strong enough, care free enough to form bonds so easily, but I'm not strong enough to push back that hardened feeling that encases me. Well, let it, but I won't reject friendship, never.
"You will be alright." Ratchet repeated to me as he lifted my head from him to face him. "I know I can barely substitute, but I'm still here if you'll tolerate me." He consoled.
I looked to his face, ironic that the bot who dismissed and protested me even being a part of their world would be the one to have that shoulder to cry on, its poetic really, well cliché but, well life can be one big cliché. "Ratchet…" I stuttered.
I watched the others, so captivated in the sky, so many colours that stood out among the fallen planet, and some whose expressions didn't really suit them in my mind, only because it was new, and strange to see such 'youthful' faces, seeing Cybertron for the first time in their existence. Even Ratchet, seemed to turn bland all of a sudden, without his usual comments.
"Beautiful." I heard Arcee say very quietly. "It's hard to believe, we made it."
"You must, Arcee." Magnus said. "We are still here, and now so are they because of our leader, you mustn't forget that."
"I doubt I'd ever get the image out of my mind for a long while." Wheeljack said.
"Few rounds of lobbing will sort that." Bulkhead said. "Wait…then that means I'll get this day out of my mind not you." To the last comment Wheeljack casually shoved Bulkhead his weight making him lose balance and almost fall.
"What vibrant shades." Knockout said placing tipped fingers under his chin as he compared the spark colours to his own finish and finding that he had options for a new look. "I have to say, the big guy left with style."
"A little too frank don't you think?" Smokescreen argued.
"Actually I think it's his way of a compliment." Bee reassured.
Well despite their hope, there's still the hurt in their optics for sure, the spark shower...it does look nice, and, wow there's going to be a lot of Cybertronians now, the most I've seen in a room is fifthteen at most, but thousands? millions? It's kind of scary, I'd like to meet them though, I wonder if they'll be blank slates, wonder why there here? Maybe they will be aware like Ratchet said.
It's a little scary and exciting, but I can't help but feel a little lost, I know, no surprise right? I'm almost half expecting Dad to just pop out of nowhere again looking bright and shiny, or to recover from an illness or stasis, or fatal injuries or…I feel, very tired, bodies just a little stressed. I don't think I'm great at hiding it though the way my head dipped and swayed.
"We'll return you to your human body." Ratchet said to me confirming his awareness. "This form was never well on your mind."
I looked around, despite everything I can't just leave there's still all this work to do and also...a-also, this is…my family. I had my family on Earth, but my Cybertronian family defended me in a way from myself, their race, my race, er, the environment. "I can't…" I told him looking as the sky started to dim, the last few sparks leaving the area.
At this point I felt another arm around me clearly I had gotten attention, but I had hoped the focus would be on well, the rainbow of sparks. "Sure you can." Bee encouraged.
"Bee." I bowed my head shaking it, "y-you don't understand, you guys are my family and I have family on Earth, how do I choose between one life and another?"
"Maybe because you're not used to it, going from one world to the next it's been integrated into us, but just think of it as going from point A to point B." Bee said. "From Earth to Cybertron, it's just a stepping stone now."
"You sure you guys are going to be okay?" I said.
"I think we have plenty of hands now." Smokescreen said.
"Excluding yours right? We don't want Cybertron going down the tube already" I jested.
"You jerk." He said folding his arms.
"I guess Earths off your radar for a while? And I shouldn't really be here now so…"
Magnus made himself known, "Your presence here, is welcome. The Spacebridge will always be accessible to you and our other human friends." He told me, out of sympathy guilt or not.
I looked him over, and for some reason he knew what I was thinking as soon as I took two steadfast steps forward, he raised a swift hand and expressed the same angry awkward face when I was hanging off his hips last time…and I hope to never say that line again...either.
"No." he simply said like telling an animal to get off the furniture, seriously why do I always try to hug the people who tolerate me the least? I must have one of those problems where I like verbal abuse or something.
"I like hugs." I argued at him dangling my arms in front like…well like me.
He took hold of my wrists lowering them down in a no-nonsense fashion, "We all need to express a sense of dignity sometimes." He said as he then started thinking muttering something as he presented a flat palm above my shoulder, giving only a very brief and swift pat once, as he stepped back shortly after, of course because I'm a kid right? We all need pats? What was that about dignity? Aw well, he's trying out different things I guess and at least it wasn't my head.
"Erm, how about a hand shake?" I then offered presenting a hand.
"I may overlook the fact that I am in this circumstance, your upperclassman so such a mutual gesture contradicts." He said taking a light grasp on my hand though I squeezed mine.
"A weak grip is a sign of a lack of character." I told him as he gave me a light glare, "That's what I've read up anyway…Give me a grip that says, friends?" I added as he squeezed his hand a little har-derrr o-okay, that was a handshake that said I have power and confidence and never critisise me again but never mind w-we'll work on that. "Yeah, that was, oozing with mutual respect." I said slightly nervously. "Well, maybe one day we might be friends huh?"
"The probability looks very...'minuscule', however I would not rule out the possibility. Not after all I have witnessed." He said, oh Magnus you and your realistic point of view, and…as much as i'm not fan of it, this planet will need that. But I'm not saying it out loud in case he runs amok again, giving out parking tickets, making citizen arrests. Criticising dress wear…er, I mean appropriate paint jobs, hmm, I wonder how much freedom this new Cybertron is going to get? Magnus will see so much chaos and disorder, he might come and live on Earth.
He released my hand as he looked ahead towards the ship, "Let's see if we can even, return you home." He said ever so casually as I on the other hand felt as though I had miss counted a step at the top of the stairs and instead fell.
"wh-what do you mean even?" I asked as he started to walk towards the ship, "Magnus Sir? The bridge is alright isn't it? Can-can you stop being 'cool' for one moment and answer my enquiries?"
On the wreckage of the Nemesis, Ratchet was tinkering, and only tinkering, the bridge was fine, thankfully, great start to this planetary relationship if we can't even visits each other. You might think my way of speech is strange at the moment considering everything, but well I can't find myself sounding any different this time.
"How are you, er, how are...you holding up?" Ratchet asked.
"Why do you ask? I mean despite the obvious."
"I've seen your limit." He replied a little grimly.
I ducked my head, I never thought I could act like that, I-I mean I have, in the past naturally but, well that's where it belongs. "A little empty, probably because I'm in this form. but there's something else." I looked at the others before turning to him again, "Can I admit something?"
"Well I was expecting more honestly."
"I-I'm still feeling…so…so angry."
"I know, as am I. with reason or not it is what it is." He told me.
I frowned at my feet as my wiped my optics, that's still a little weird. "I'm going to miss him, I miss him now."
"If you didn't it, I would have concerns for your health." He said pulling her in.
"Hm. If you spot a nerdy bot walking around, you give me a call right?"
"Well that will be difficult for me personally."
"First you complain about our technology, now you can't use your own?"
"It's not that, I'll be on Earth as well, so it would be difficult."
"You're coming with me? Even now?" I say. "I don't think that's such a great idea, I mean with everyone's expertise you're the only medic, what if Magnus falls and just spontaneously combusts this time?"
"We still have our history, it can be taught."
"Most of that history, you know most of it already y-"
He put out hands in a 'stop' manner as he winced like I was giving him a headache. "Just stop. Don't try to be noble about this or whatever you would call 'this', I already said I'd supervise you."
I clicked my fingers, "Well dang, you called me out. Called me out like a silver tongue politician." I looked around. "You know, I'd want to see Cybertron when it's done. I'm sure you would too."
"Excuse me, but that would be after your school work. This was only a temporal expedition." He said. "You're in my charge now. again."
"Irony; my old friend who mocks me one too many times."
He tapped a finger on his arm out of idle standing as he looked conflicted with words, "You don't...you don't have to go to school for a while, I'd rather you finish your exams with long study then go to school and unravelling everything you've learned." He said.
I leant on him again making him shift slightly, which is understandable not really being used to this kind of contact. "I don't know, I think I should go back to school with all the people around, it might give me that kind of concentration."
"Hm, well we'll just see how we go from here." His own expression fell as reality caught up with him. I placed a hand on his arm to get his attention.
"I may not be as comforting or counselling as he was, but I hope I can still try to be just as dear friend to you." I said putting my hands behind my back. Looking me over his head turned to one side just as quickly, In fear that I had offended him I turned flustered, "Ra-Ratchet-"
"Its alright." he stated loudly. "Your easily stressed over something that just sounded more melo-dramatic then anything." he added lightly. "I know you mean well...but you may run risk of alienating yourself if you were to speak to other humans in that context and tone." he joked with a crusty tone.
As well as that, it was no better when looking at the group in front of me, it was so hard, and to just leave after…after all that's happened it was too fast. "I know you guys would probably want to discuss building plans, and the future with this being a new age all. But can I say some goodbyes? Not like when we left Earth, it felt brief like everything else."
"Well Cybertrons not going anywhere…right?" Smokescreen said shrugging looking around the group.
"Wh-what do you think?" I said to Magnus.
He tensed his fingers a little as sort of given permission.
"Thank you...Well then, I'll start with the first bot I ever met, Bee." I said. "Better watch your frame because what I'm going to say might make it rust."
"I need a new design anyway." He said.
"Well, Bee whenever the bots were out fighting Cons when I was growing up, you were there to give me the company, we'd play games, we'd go places that weren't exactly allowed. You always told me that you were a scout and you weren't very confident with your place in the team, maybe because I was a kid you thought I wouldn't really listen when you said that but it gave you something to say. But, I listened...even If I rarely gave you a chance to speak, Well maybe you weren't as experienced as the rest, but after that your perspective of yourself changed over the years."
"I thought talking to you would be like talking to a statue. Not my best initiative." he joked.
"Thanks."
"I only mean that you get some relief when you admit certain things." He explained.
"Well that works. You know, there were a lot of restrictions at base, I remember that you worked your way around them. But you were still careful, heh Warrior." I said. "I'll be simple in saying that you were like a brother." yeah-yeah I've watched over three thousands movies so far and I'm prone to this formula, but it's true that's how I see him, and I tell him this now? Timing!
His optics brighten slightly, "So, even-"
"And still are." I interrupted. "I don't argue with you as much as I did then but I guess that's maturity."
"That's one way of putting it."
"Or maybe not. I'm still a little sore from the nose pinches you gave me when I was sleeping."
"It's been fun, I've never encountered someone younger than myself, even more of blank slate actually."
"Again…thanks." I said.
"But then you started getting older, to the point that you were in the same life stage as me, and I guess you had other interests other than building a fort."
I glanced to the group, "Er y-yeah, I-don't-build-forts-anymore." I said, erm, f-forts are awesome don't try to change me.
"Well, I missed that."
"But then there was Raf." I told him. "And you both had someone to talk and listen with."
"Yeah…" he said lightly but also with sorrow for remembrance of him, "You tell him I'm still serious about just being a bridge away."
"Sure...I'll...I'll miss you Bee." I said, he lifted his arms a little tensing fingers as he moved forward to hug me, I didn't want to drag it out too much that it would turn into blubbering, on my part anyway, but I rested my head on his shoulder as I hugged him back, but I had to retract but still showing appreciation as I moved down the group, "Hey idiot." I said to Smokescreen.
"Come at me then." He said throwing his fists up in front of his face.
I clasped my hands together rubbing them, "'Ya'll ready for this?'…first off stay away from politics." I grinned goofily.
"Haaa…"
"Now let's see, since your appearance you've kind of been the little brother of the team." I saw his shoulders slump casually I guess this is typical criticism from me now.
"Little brother? Alright, what kind of conscience talk is this, this time?"
"Yeah you know…you know he exists, you don't want him but your parents seem to want to keep him and you have no choice in the matter really. And then as you go further down the road he's there you try to help him but he just goes from extreme dumb to maybe understanding back to dumb again and I-" I stopped with a nervous laugh to the expression he gave me. "I-I mean no its been fine, even if you did get captured on the Nemesis but came out of there without any repercussions or acknowledgement of your own mistakes and even Arcee expressed her admiration even though I didn't really get that maybe she was scared because you nearly fell into the ground? I don't know it's just kind of weird and out of place, I mean okay sure your whimsy but life isn't made up of 'oh its fine it'll work out in the end', an-and then this whole 'Prime' thing must've given you mixed messages or something but you way you described it, it felt like a big deal, A-Are we going to just glance over that as though it didn't happen? w-what was it just a 'your a special snowflake' moment? And why did Ratchet say your judgement was sound? And as usual? W-was that fear of losing Dad talking there too? And what's with the phase shifter? How come you went through Shockwave but didn't use it to phase the fossil too?" I expressed this very loudly but as a sort of bipolar response I just breathed in and grinned widely as he looked slightly frightened, of course I can speak that fast to the point its just a series of noise but hey I got it all in.
"Er, you okay?" Smoke said.
I inhaled again, "Nope fine. Just expressing everything that I was confused of but I didn't really want to bring it up until it was all over, because I'm just awkward. Hey this is great! not holding anything in feels reliving wow!" I said grinning like there was something not right with my head, which I already know that but hey they say to admit that as much as you can…and you know how nuts I can get when I don't get an explanation, but I'm fine now…smiley face?
"Is this, your way of having a 'moment' with me?" he jested weakly from that long paragraph.
"Right, sorry. Er, you're alright." I slapped a hand over his face, covering it and patting it a few times. "Live long and prosper dude."
He lazily clapped, "great speech. encore?" He said sarcastically.
"Right, speech….speech, okay how about this? You try to improve morale, the attitude, give the bots that sense of energy because unlike you they have seen too much reality and have grown tired. You have good intentions with your words but sometimes come out wrong because of your naïvety. Maybe you're not the best bot to talk to, but you do listen at least." I said smiling though I may have just contradicted myself.
"That was it?" he said. "Wow…bland, in a losing a sense of purpose in life kind of way."
I threw my arms up, "Screw it."
"No-No-No." he said grabbing my shoulder. "I'm good- I'm good you didn't even call me dumb once, well this time…and not directly. An-and that's translation for? You care?" he said confused. "Th-That's just confused me even more."
"Take it for whatever you want." I said as I tapped my palms against my hips, "Erm, were you really going to come look for me?"
"Well sure, what did you think I was going to do, brush it off and just say hey thats life move on?" he said. "Wait...you heard all that when you were trapped?"
"Yeah...it was like being under water but, i heard."
He scratched the back of his helm, "At one point, you might have heard me-"
"Its okay Smokescreen, everyone loses their cool."
"Thanks for not rubbing that in my face...But it kind of sucks that I came in so late, I barely know anything of Earth, or all the fun places Bees mentioned if there's any at all I still don't believe him. But hey, we'll come back right?" he said.
"Take it easy, okay? And scrape a knee or something Bubble-bot." She jested.
He then slowly but awkwardly lifted his arms in front of him, "Er, this is right. R-right?" he said awkwardly. "Come on Bee did it."
"Y-eah I think I'll take lead here." I said lightly hugging him. when stepping back Smokescreen loosened his shoulders.
"So, see you around?"
"Sure, just stay away from fire and pointy objects."
"Your not going to stop are you? If I say I'm offended by that does that mean I get to whack you back?" he asked as my answer was the front view of my back.
Next up. "Magnus." I sighed grinning awkwardly, "Phew, wow, Ultra Magnus, erm…" I sceptically patted his arm, "Yeah see you around Commander." I said skipping to the next bot, before whipping back around, "I'm just kidding, seriously though, the textbook thing, sometimes…maybe a little more than that, makes you a little undesirable, but your lovable in a undesirable…wait, that doesn't sound right you're a, lovable jerk, I-I mean I wanna whack you in the face I mean! …you alright." I gave his arm a small whack, "you better not ask for clearance and identification when I come through that bridge."
"If you had chosen your words more carefully perhaps, but now I will. Especially to the threatening tone you were suggesting." He said as I held my arm, not really sure what else to say to him, I don't expect to be good friends with every bot I mean not everyone likes everyone after all I've mentioned this before, but, I don't know I don't really try to make friends with jerks but, he's not always a jerk just wants to do his job right, but then again, he's still a jerk…oh so much inner thought.
So to shuffle my foot a little to hint that I was moving onto the next bot I saw him think again, and recognising awkward social approach, well I've had my share. "Although…" he then said. "Although you are very opinionated especially if it's not your way and you have a tendency to question everything. and critisise everything."
"P-Please take note that I have very low self-esteem and any manner of criticism will make me hide under my bed for years." I warned linking my hands together tightly.
"You are, brave and willing, and even how primitive your race is, your intelligence is varied to wisdom on occasion." he started practically making me feel my optics sparkle but then I sensed a 'however'. "You need to work on shortening your sentences to what is relevent, and first impressions are very poor."
I, took it. could've been worse afterall. "Sorry. Your commanding attitude made me, wary." I admitted.
"When your own are at possible risk, you can't be too trusting." he said.
I pinched my chin, "Well I never thought about it that way. Do you, still have questions about Earth?"
"It's not necessary at this time." He said realistically.
I scuffed my feet, "That's true…So, not even if it's a question like why we eat bear claws? In a, literal sense?"
"Many other creatures you share with this planet is a source of energy for you, I do not need to ask." he said matter of fact.
"No I mean, the way I mean is, Well nevermind, but you know, just in case you come back."
"Perhaps."
"Fine, stay proud." I joked moving on.
"Arcee." I started softly as I inhaled a little nervous as she stood a little awkward in stance, "I know we've, never really seen eye to optic, I know I keep saying that to you but its true and we may never be as close as some of the others, but well…I've never really known how to act around matured females. I'm even a little uncomfortable around Jacks Mom. I've had a lot of male figures in my life I guess I got a little scared maybe a little threatened when someone different came along. Besides Mom, I've never seen a Femme…Not that makes any difference but, I was nearly a teenager and everything felt replaced and sometimes phases don't go, I still wasn't used to you…"
"Calm down, this isn't a debate, I understand. More than you know in fact." She said calmly, "Now you're just a lingering brat instead of purposely getting under my armour." She mock insulted.
"Brat? A word like that to go with my character? I don't think so, I prefer the term 'youthfully troubled'." I said.
She lightly sighed, "Let's stop this now, and be serious, I've not really offered you any advice before and let's be honest, not like this either. But, just remember, that when you lose someone it's not the end for, well your 'heart'. It just makes room for others to come into your life." She placed a hand on her hip, "I'm not really that great at making speeches." She said.
"At least, we talked. Like just a normal toned conversation."
Her shoulders eased up, "I'm Jacks guardian, among other things. But can you make sure he focuses on his school work, make sure that mind of his isn't wasted at that, fast food complex."
"I'll try, I even have a plan." I jested ominously.
"A plan?" she said with doubt.
I tapped my nose, "Let's just say I've taken care of the little distraction known as 'Sierra'." I said as she rolled her optics in a typical fashion, alright so I'm no assassin...but let's just say I 'talked' her into submission…alright that sounded lame as well, point is, any interests will cease until prom I'll tell you that, heh-heh…prom...*sigh* sorry…I, I thought…never mind.
So I, offered a hand propping another hand shake as I dipped my head slightly, "Goodbye…Cee." I said. "Maybe, one day we'll swap stories."
"Well, we're still not really there yet but, we've still got time." She said and by her tone she noticed my drop in stance too.
"Better work fast then." I said nodding a farewell.
"Don't push it, kid." she said.
Moving along, I started to become solemn again, going through the stages of grief again I think keeps coming back when I don't want it too, "Bulkhead…I used to talk to you on good terms actually, Miko made that barely able heh but that's how it's supposed to be. Guardian and charge, a duo." I said.
"When I came to this planet, I thought the human race was a jerk, the soldiers were jerks, the government were jerks, you were...er, strange."
"I was five. why does not one get that? I was dumb. I don't even think I was aware of my own existance."
"When I first saw a human it was you and you were spinning around, walking into trees and arguing with the fish." he said.
I scratched my helm as a heard a blurted laugh from Smokescreen, it was also really quiet in the background... "I-I-I don't r-remember any-any of that." I stuttered.
"I might not be skilled at many things but my memory is crystal clear." he said tapping his head.
I tried to think of a diversion, "Ok-Okay so I ruined your impression of our race, bu-but then came Miko ri-right?"
He lowered his head, "Right, I never expected her. Its different when you have your own charge."
"She did change your perspective about our world, maybe not its individuals but her in particular at least got you to drop the 'fleshy' word. I know this sounds cruel but, when your situations were dire, she became more aware of what was at stake and the risks involved. It didn't change her as a person though because of that and that's reliving, but she is capable of being reserved."
"Not sure I agree with you on that."
"Well all opinion really. You sure can take a beating though...But no more from now on I hope." I twitched my fingers as a small wave.
So, Wheeljack, "Wheeljack….good grief I can't keep up with you, or what you're thinking, but your defiantly the rebellious adrenaline of this group. But er, lower the use of grenades huh? There novelty is kind of wearing down."
"Wearing down. Wearing down? What are you the grenade dictator?"
"Yeah because that's a real thing." I said sarcastically. "Stay for a while on here this time."
"Well from the looks of things, I won't have any plans." He said. "You take care of yourself."
"Thanks…See ya." I then looked to Bumblebee standing by the control panel as I slightly nodded at him, a portal opened just behind as I looked it over…its constant loud buzzing and humming, sounding forceful all of a sudden, "For now, your gone. I need to remind myself this, True or not that you will come back, someone like me can't hold onto that anymore to get me by, to look out windows and waste time, time that I can be using if I want to pursue my own goals. You come back or you don't…why can't I say that without clenching my fists? *sigh* With Cybertron bright again, I could see it in the sky at night, maybe."
Then I felt a hand on my shoulder again, "Time to go." Ratchet said becoming aware of my sudden jolt that came as well, I'm very twitchy recently. I turn my head to behind me before making a quick turn back, I've said my goodbyes have to let them get on with their lives, and mine.
I forced myself to move even when I heard someone say my name only briefly but it was clear, not sure who though, m-might've been Bee.
So on the other side…on the other side. It was like when someone stood alone in a room, and only moments before was full of friends, now only a memory and the reality was this. Not even anything to clean up. From this height, the empty room was very prominent…no more missions, no more drives, no more Autobots…
But then I look down, aw guys…I don't know how long it's been, only a day, maybe a few but I've missed them. Jack, Miko, Raf. I think I would've went even more nuts then I already am if they weren't here from the start.
Jacks greeting was bland as it is but that's him, barely speed walking up to me with his hands by his sides and giving a light smile as a welcoming gesture.
Miko made a whooping sound as she kicked me in the foot, I guess it's the equivalent to a light punch in the shoulder, but that was her greeting as well as numerous questions asking about her guardian, rather than any fights with Decepticons, I heard her but I just let the notions pass as I carefully stepped forward letting her follow my feet instead of being in front.
Raf raised a hand with a small wave and smile. He's a little quiet than usual, well quieter since this all began, a little knocked down maybe since Bee left but, time is sometimes a healer but i'll talk to him.
I raised a palm to show my greeting as I watched Ratchet slightly scruff Miko and put her to one side out of the way of the path we walked as well as uttering lecturing words to her and giving attention to Raf as well.
"Hey." Jack finally said. "See anything good?" he asked lightly.
My expression relaxed a little before I looked to the med table and all the equipment needed for me to return to my human body, which I spotted just below…looking fine as usual. I started walking slowly as I heard Agent Fowlers voice aimed at Ratchet with questions no doubt but I just wanted to get back into my body.
"Ellen?" Jack repeated and I didn't answer, nothing more frustrating to me to be ignored when you've asked a question, but I can't find myself speaking...come on, say something.
"One moment Jack, my heads hurting." I simply said.
...I'll have to tell them, when someone is gone it effects everyone, only that person can say how that someone was to them, if they influenced change in them or perhaps friendship, certain words or actions that caught there eye, or maybe nothing at all. But I will have to tell them, no-no I don't want Ratchet to do it. He's endured a thousand times more life experience than myself.
Lying on the table now I ask Ratchet to handle the controls, not even seconds went by that I found myself human again, expecting what happened last time, I though I'd be screaming by now, cursing, hurting, and I felt…content. B-But why? after laying there quietly for a little longer than a moment, that was frustrating in itself...whats going on?!
I lifted my human self-off the table silently making my way down to the others, "What happened?" Jack then said as I stared at him for a while before I sprinted forward towards him.
"Can I, get a fist bump?" I asked weakly.
"Sure?" he said performing said gesture sceptically. "You're making me anxious El, what happened?" he asked as Miko, Raf and Fowler closed in.
I let my hands slide as I leaned back a bit, "Its fine. Your bots are fine."
"Then why are you-"
"Just saw a rainbow of sparks." I said casually.
"Don't…dodge it." he said a little frustrated as he ran in front of me. "Please." he added placing his hands on my shoulder.
I sighed, "I think we, all need to sit down."
"Ellen." Ratchet said. "I'll explain."
I shook my head, "Please, I want to." I said as he stepped back as a means of yes. "Agent Fowler." I said. "You will want to hear this too."
Sat on the couch with my fingers linked I looked them all over, Fowler was biting his lip slightly his eyes shut frustrated as he tapped a fist against the railing hissing Dads name slightly. Jack looked bewildered staring at the floor with his mouth only slightly open as he lent his hands on top of his fists in thought, his leg started to shake out of a nervous response. Miko was very notably responsive her eyes and eyebrows both expressed hurt. Her arms and legs couldn't keep still as she wanted to go into her own little world, standing up, walk around and sitting again as she made stuttered sounds of questions and denying the claims.
Finally Rafs head was turned to one side facing the floor, on the brink of tears as I saw him lift his glasses up to rest on his head as he wiped his eyes with a fist, his nose responded as did his eyes as I heard him slightly sniff now and then.
As I let this play, Fowler spoke first, "And this is confirmed? The way I see it I'm thinking some of their Cybertronian 'voodoo-mumbo-jumbo' will come in play some time, so are you sure?"
"I…I don't know…"
"I don't think the men upstairs go well with 'so-so' answers." He said.
"Fowler." Jack interrupted as he took hold of my wrist, "She said she doesn't know, you can't ask her if she knows for definite if he returns or not. Trust me, Its something I've been asking most of my life." he argued defensively I might add.
"Its okay Jack, we're all just a little, confused." I said patting his shoulder.
Fowler clenched his fist but calmed himself down as he sat between us, "Listen, I-I know that, they can wait for that report." he then spoke to Jack directly. "When I don't know what to say, I just hollar, you understand don't you?"
Jack nodded, "Thats alright just work on it." he told him, I...guess I missed a few things while I was away. He then looked at me as he cleared his throat awkwardly, "You wanna stay with me and Mom? I can make up the guest room?" he asked.
"You imply she has nowhere to go." Ratchet said, Jack briefly looked at him before he ducked his head as he mouthed to me, 'serious?'
I nodded, "I'm the emotional baggage that's been dumped onto him." I said quietly.
"Dramatic?"
"Yeah…but for sure, Ratch is going to look out for me…you know until I can free myself 'lawfully'."
Jack just raised an eyebrow at me as I look over to Raf, "So, are you still going to stay in Jasper?" Jack then asked slightly anxiously.
"Jack…" I said as a message of 'not now', changing places I sat myself between Raf and Miko as I shuffled my way down to Rafs height. "Raf?" he turned to me slightly with his head down still and glasses off, looking slightly ashamed right now, I can understand that but still, "You know…" I started to say as he looked up at me then he just lay his head on my legs bunching his knees up as I tensed a little, "O-Okay, I guess you did know..." I said as I placed a hesitant hand on his shoulder. He just lay there quietly as I felt the awkward eyes upon me, honestly had no idea what to do so I just stayed still, but looking at him, curled up in sorrow, Not suprising I saw myself in that usual state...but what could I say? "...You'll be okay Raf." I said quietly.
He wiped his eyes again as he lifted himself up, "And what about you?" he said with slight frustration.
"Me? Nah, you stress over yourself." I placed my hands in my lap, "Just get school over with, think of your future and get yourselves to Cybertron...well, you know whenever your free." I looked at Fowler, "I think, maybe you guys need your own space, at home, just to think of this yourselves. It's just, too empty here. too wide opened."
Miko sat up, "My place isn't all that great either." She argued.
I sighed, "I'm, not just asking for you guys, I need a place to go to…you know. And I don't want you to see that, I'm just not comfortable. I'm sorry if that sounds cold and, rude for that matter."
"…Well, when I'm at home in my room alone, I sometimes play a solo." Miko said as I blinked at her not really understanding. "Of country genre?"
"Oh." I said a smile creeping over my face.
"I see a smile, you laughing inside? I got you, I finally got you." she said before rubbing her arm, "Yeah…it's not that bad, just when I'm not feeling that great I just sing and play a soft tune on my guitar, only when I'm alone. When Bulkhead was…" She said as we shared that understanding she stood up putting on a smile as she clasped her hands together, "Raf, how about we all hang at yours? Didn't you finally afford that new laptop?"
"Yeah…" he said solemnly though Miko looked at me slightly gesturing me for encouragement.
"Oh, yeah, y-you know Ratchet just needs to tweak the comm link a little more and we'll have a visual as well and you can show Bee it too. Maybe even you could give your laptop that own kind of er, boost. And he'll always be near then." I said.
He slightly cocked an eyebrow at us as he hopped off the couch, "it…has a capability system that matches that of a supercomputer."
"Good-good-good…ah…great...what does that mean?" I said sounding confident I knew what that meant despite the question as Raf humoured me with a smile.
"It means that it's able to solve a problem of a complexity no other computer can perform." He explained as I just nodded.
"That sounds, expensive." I said stroking my chin.
"Wow...you sound, old." Miko proclaimed shaking her head in mock shame.
"It'll help us monitor activity outside our atmosphere, as well as other things." He said.
"Right." Jack then said. "We're still a team here." He said directing it to me. "Yeah?"
"Erm, sure."
"You don't sound it."
"No-No I am, your right we could still get hostiles, stray Decepticons, and also we have problems here. So yeah we still have work to do." I said.
Jack nudged me in the arm, "We stay as a group...I think we all need each other now. seeing how much exposure we've had too. how much we've handled...had to handle." He then looked at Fowler, "But…Erm Fowler would you mind giving us lift?"
"Sure son..."
"Fowler?" I then say. "Just tell the guys upstairs your translation of what I told you, and that everything's fine now. T-That's what they basically like to hear right? Everything's fine?"
"Makes it easier on me too." He said.
Miko then gestured her hands to come closer, "We need a huddle hug." She said as we just copied what she was doing like planning a strategy or something I guess that's what she meant. "All right, now we're huddled bounded for life by that which is the huddle."
"Your saying we should keep this group special?" I said.
"Er-yeah. You know Autobot-Human partners." She said.
"A-Actually, there are probably a few more out there with a similar status." I said with a nervous chuckle.
"Fine, then the Nevada group then?"
"Well, first off you've only been here a few years originating from Japan and I'm from L.A."
"Urgh, don't cut down my creativity." She said pondering before clicking her fingers, "I got it, M.E.R.J."
"Merge?" us confused three said.
"No, not the word the letters, the first letter of each our names, making M.E.R.J, just sounds right."
"Sounds cheap." I said.
"Only because you didn't think of it first." She argued.
"Ouch, got me there."
"Alright, M.E.R.J it is. for, some, reason." Jack said slightly cringing to the name but wanting to calm us down, "say it a few times maybe it'll sound better."
"Or not." I said on purpose.
"Hey technically I'm the founder of this organisation so, I can kick you out anytime."
"I beg mercy Miko-Sama." I jested.
"We could always over-throw her." Raf added making us snicker.
Our banter died down as we halted things to a sudden calm in the air and looked over another, we were all aware now, even when I had left, I didn't feel left out, we all at this point knew...and I noticed my eyes produce liquid again without me knowing as I ran a finger under it and flicked it away, "We, better get on home. Just to, settle." Jack said.
"It's about time, I have other things to think about." Fowler said walking downstairs but stopping half way, "We, should all be thankful to Optimus Prime." he said thoughtfully adjusting his tie. Though no one mentioned his name, we all slightly tensed up to that reminder who was no longer among us. "Now let's move." he finished.
Jack turned to me as he lazily draped his hand along the start of the railing, "See you...in school?"
"Maybe…I'm not completely sure yet." I said as he put a hand on my shoulder.
"You sure you're going to be okay?"
"I will, eventually. I have Ratchet don't worry." I assured.
"I'll be seeing you, school or not." He said finally going downstairs. With nods and exaggerated waves I watched them go as Ratchet grabbed my attention with a mumbled sound.
"You okay?"
"I should run some scans on you, with an added examination." He said. "Go sit on the operating table."
Well that was fast. "Ratchet…I'm kind of tired here." I said in a limp manner.
"Sit."
I shrugged, I'm tired but I'm too tired to defend my argument that I'm too tired. But I wish I had...
"Ahhh! what is that full beam? Your burning my retinas." I complained trying to shield my eyes from the light Ratchet was using.
"Will you stop moving!" He protested over my cries. "If you miss the smallest of problems they become the biggest."
"Yeah but can't you do it without rendering me incapable of seeing my future grandchildren Jeez." I said.
"Ellen, just do as I say." He said seriously. "I can't risk it, not after all that." Of course, use the guilt method...Fine...I lay still as he examined my eyes, "Look to the left…the right…up…and down…now directly at the light." He muttered something at the end then that horrible light finally stopped as I saw big black blotches and the inside of my eye flash in my view.
Ratchet then started tapping at the vital scans on his arm as he directed me to look at the screen, "My scans reveal no trace of Dark Energon, as expected but as a caution I may need a blood sample."
"Sample? and taken with what?!" I hollered.
And in ignoring me, "Your sensory system is fine could be better but I suppose its human limits, motor functions, bmi is slightly under average but nothing to risk your health, but we'll have to bring that up again."
"Aw man 'eating' hard job there." I looked my body over on-screen as he explained further, I stared at my arm, standing out as a blue aura as I smiled, "I didn't think…I still have it, Energon signature and all."
Ratchet looked up, "Yes, if I re-call that arm was my suggestion."
I scoffed, "Sure 'suggestion' I must've agreed to it when I was unconscious right?" I said as he looked slightly guilty. "I-It was a good call Ratch, good call Its fine. Well, when I first got it I'll admit I hated the thing, sometimes I still don't like the thought of it but, it's helped me to a point that it's overused heh. Saved my life on Cybertron."
Ratchet looked quizzical. "How?"
"I don't know, I can only spout nonsense but, maybe the power of a Prime isn't just a physical representation, maybe it followed with me, repelling Unicrons will, fighting him, shielding me against it and acting as an electromagnetic pull to bring my mind back in tact with Starlight's body. T-That's what my imagination has come up with anyway." I placed my hand over my arm lightly wiping it down.
"Perhaps I'll perform research into that claim in the near future just for the sake of curiosity. But for now-"
"What?" I then said I placed it on my chest next. "Still there?" I said, "So, it is binding?"
"Before our base had imploded, causing Optimus fatal injuries this situation was not like that. From what I understand it is binding but it should not appear so clear, it should be a very faint trace-"
"When the other dies." I said. I sit up, "Let's just say its unmedically clear." I stretch. "Besides I'm pretty exhausted after all that, feel like I've had a weeks' worth of staying up all night watching movies." I headed up top to the couch then lay myself down. It's so empty in this place now…feels small. "Just you and me now." I said meekly.
Ratchet looked around. "The sound of ambience is a nice change of pace." He said, though the reassurance sounded a little off with him. "That seat will do no good for your back." He said.
I looked around, "I guess, I could sleep on the floor." I jested.
He sighed heavily, "Hopefully there will be another relocation in this state at least."
"Can we not talk about moving yet please?"
"Just, something to say really." He said looking at me, finding my behaviour odd by the looks of it.
"Yeah…" I said laying on my back as I stared at the ceiling and without even thinking or producing any kind of emotional trigger, tears fell down my face without even realising yet again. Just flowing like river trickles over Cliffside rocks. I got stressed, I got worried, even to a point it made me physically sick. But that just turned to what to expect, I never thought about it but it still came.
I won't get 'used' to reality, you need to think of the good that come from it, even if it's an argument of if its right or not, like adopting a human during what is ultimately war. I didn't know any better when that happened, maybe it was like what Dad said because I was scared when I heard about being taken into care or maybe it was the sound of someone wanting me with only a few people in my life then, he reassured me that it was never out of guilt and I'll believe him.
I wonder how many more people I'll meet in the future now with a new kind of outlook and without fear of Decepticons...I can go wherever. "With being consorts now, the others will have a more productive weekend." Ratchet said continuing his regular post at the computer.
"Yeah?" I grinned as I stroked my chin, "That's right…hey Ratch I'm seventeen soon."
"Just another year and you're out of the base." He said in a celebrating tone.
"Haa…that dry Ratchet wit…I would like to turn your attention back to a guilt situation." I said to him.
"Ellen…" he said seriously.
"Sorry…when I go through the seven stages of grief I bounce in between, but I think I'm at stage 4" I looked at him with needing eyes, "…I really need you here right now, if that's okay?"
"I might take a large amount of patience, but of course…" I hear him sigh.
"It's not great is it? Waiting…not knowing." I said.
"No…but there's plenty to do to keep us occupied." He then murmured something. "There, first step, making contact." He said placing icons on the screen. "And keeping a clear frequency."
"That's good." I said flatly.
"Mm. Bumblebee sent a message, Cybertronians are already landing it seems." He said curiously, perhaps wondering if any of then are old friends of his.
"Really?"
"Not as many as we'd hope…but, it would be reliving to find old comrades still survived." called it.
I sat up anticipated, "Wow…this is happening fast." I stood up watching the screen besides Ratchet as I felt his optics on me.
"Will you be alright?" I heard him say as I lifted my head.
"Not now, much later. Like when someone hits you in the face and you fall to the ground, there's a moment of vulnerability, you feel weak, but it's not just about how much hits you can take and to carry it's also about how much you must take after you picked yourself back up again. But of course sometimes you need that hand to help you up again. I think you need that too."
He lightly rolled his optics, "Well…I can't say I haven't heard all those kind of sayings before memory is an awful curse after all, but, well maybe it's the first for you to figure that out."
"To be frank, yes I think I'll be okay. In the end." I said. "Then maybe we can see Cybertron again…?"
"Let's just monitor Earth for now."
"As in us? You and I? And our little gang of humans? Hey you can be our sidekick, like the robot from lost in space or Scooby-doo." I said.
"Don't start..."
Well, I'll stop narrating longer than Spiderman and finish here, since that day, I have dreams again, of him, and they say if you think of someone all the time like that, you do get them. And as far as dreams go, they feel real.
I mostly find myself on Cybertron with him, he is different but the same? How could I say it? Er, like new armour? No…well we mostly talk, and walk, about all the things you wouldn't really talk about in usual conversation, of course I'm the one talking too much but he talks just as much in the dream I mean, usually I don't give him the chance.
I don't know what makes me feel hopeful, but those dreams were bright, but kind of weird I mean some dreams don't really represent some things accurately but, well Bee was there too, he looks kind of different though like he has had new armour himself and a new frame. But that could just be from when he made a comment like that. What's also weird is that I'm seeing other bots, different ones I've never seen before probably because of the thoughts of all those sparks that came from the well, but either way I don't care. Delusional mind or not, I don't want to stop having them. At least until I see them again for real.
Well, this is the most intense and fast paced stage of my life, before it used to be steady and I used to complain. But that's how life is really, don't make plans…well make plans, like 'hey you free this Friday night?' plans, but don't plan your future, just run with it, because chances are circumstances might change them, so try and do as much as you can with what you have, you gotta get it all in somehow with how short our lives are.
So, to finish this I'll offer personal advice, don't be afraid. And when I mean afraid I mean things that might or might not happen, with your sense of security, illness, fights, the acts of others on your fellow race or other species, most of all rely on yourself and of course others, but don't solely rely on the strength of one being you have to give yourself strength as well.
So just be aware that life is a huge troll, and if you keep encouraging it to be cruel then it will get to you, so don't let it. you can get upset and that's only natural but don't let it control your life but just be aware that it will always be there and you don't know when it can come back again to torture you, when someone becomes ill, or lost, or have had lost their lives.
As now as I lay here on the sofa, met with unpleasantness again. Don't worry about me, I'll pick myself up again somehow, I always have I'm not a lot of things, well, I do have a lot of membership cards but nothing that specifically identifies me as a person, but what I mean is I still have will…it's a very damaged will, but still a will…to survive, to live even if I'm depressed as hell I don't think of any other outcome for me in my mind despite what I might say at the time.
I do hope however, that one day, after my travels, career whatever I decide, that I go back to Cybertron, seeing all those people and maybe when I turn the corners of their cities, I hope that one corner will catch me off guard, and from him a softened smile, I'll see him again...
The End...
Chapter was longer than expected huh? :P
as a random thing from my thoughts on the series here's my top ten favourite characters in Prime including Optimus you can probally guess his place :P
10: Arcee
9: Wheeljack
8: Raf
7: Jack
6: Bumblebee
5:Dreadwing
4:Knockout
3: Ultra Magnus (used to be number 4 in my head but moved up after the episode Evolution :P)
2: Ratchet
1: Optimus Prime (not much mystery there :P)
A/N With there being a new cartoon and it also being a follow-up to Prime gives opportunity to a sequel to this fic, but probably not, if there is interest for a sequel to this then I will gladly write one but, only if there is interest, right now for me personally I'd like a shot at a prequel for now :) so thank you again and bye for now guys i'm off to update other fics :)
My thanks to all who have stayed with me till the very end, (I've mentioned this i know, but ohh I couldn't contain the emotions :'}) and feel free for the last time in this story PLEASE R+R ^^ byeee :')