Chapter 35- Revenge is a sweet thing

It's funny when you think of death really. You never know what exactly is out there until you die, and that's when it's too late to turn back and warn anyone else. Everyone creates their own little story of how great the afterlife will be, because secretly their terrified that it may be worse than living.

And then there are the people who like to further other people's fear, because their own doubts lead them to believe that by doing wrong, they will be forced to make up for their mistakes when their dead.

Basically, everyone lives in fear their entire lives. Forgetting to make the most of being alive because they think death may be around the corner.

Me? I used to believe death was going to be better. Because at the time there could have been nothing worse than the hell I was already in. As a witch I believed in a place called the summerland, a place created by the imaginations of humans who claimed to be witches. Despite that they weren't the same as me, I clung onto that dream as it was the only thing I had left.

They claimed it to be a beautiful land, stuck in the eternal season of summer. There was supposedly no war. No quarrels with the fellow dead. Everyone would be happy, and they would have everything they ever wanted.

It always did sound too good to be true; but a desperate person will dream of anything when clinging onto life.

I did change my mind when I met Cherry. I didn't fear death anymore, but I had a reason other than fruitless dreams to stay alive. On that logic alone I never cast a thought to what would await me. Even so, it wasn't this.

Death had brought to a place without colour. A universe comprised entirely of the black shade. A place that had sucked away all the goodness, including the colours of the living.

I was alone. Alone with senses that had nothing to receive. It was in fact, the true hell of a nightmare.

I sat what I assumed to be my body on the infinite black. Since I couldn't see myself, or touch anything; it was yet to be disputed whether the afterlife had left me with a body.

Clearly death was all about thinking. There was nothing else I could do. I would surely be insane within the hour. Given if there was even a concept of time here at all.

I imagined clenching my fists. I was going insane already.

As if hell had heard my thoughts, the space around me beeped. A second passed before it happened again. And again. I listened in alarm as the noise didn't stop. I thought of twisting and turning, trying to track the sound.

Yet I couldn't place it. Couldn't pin-point it to a specific location. It was everywhere.

So I screamed and screamed, with a body that didn't exist. With a sound that didn't go away.

"How is she?"

"How do you think? I've never seen so many broken bones in a person still alive. But she'll live, if that's what you mean"

The voices were silent for a moment, a quiet, resigned sobbing echoing around the room.

"This is my fault"

"How could this be your fault"

"Look at her! Someone was out there, doing this to her, whilst I was sleeping with someone else. I even got married for heavens sake! I should have been there watching her, protecting her"

"Don't blame yourself. You couldn't help what happened. You could never have gone with her anyway, so it didn't matter what you were doing here"

"If that's supposed to make me feel any better, it doesn't"

One of the voices sighed heavily.

"I don't expect it to…Just don't forget. She's not the only one who needs to be taken care of. You can't neglect yourself because of this"

The sobbing took on a cracked quality, growing louder as a voice sighed again before footsteps pattered into a fade.

Infinity passed before I realized there was silence. At some point the beeping had disintegrated. At a point in time I had stopped screaming.

I imagined opening my eyes; and I was greeted with a world of colour. I saw greys and yellows, oranges and blues. I saw every colour on the spectrum and more.

A hair brushed alongside my ear, and a bird tweeted from somewhere.

There was sound, and colour. I could feel my stiff body twitching as it awakened.

With sudden clarity. I realized I was alive.

Thousands of seconds had ticked by as I tried to comprise an answer to the impossible.

And I only knew there was time because there was a clock somewhere on the left side of my hearing.

I had figured out a lot of things as the memories flooded back. But I still had no answer as to how I was alive.

Frieza had broken every bone in my body. Bones that had magically reassembled themselves solid and together as I tested each muscle in turn out of its stiffness.

He had bled me dry of my blood. Blood that was back and flowing like a waterfall in my body.

And the most confusing part. My heart had stopped. A heart that was now quite happily pounding out its tune in my chest.

I thought of sitting up, and this time I felt my arms and spine obey me. My fingers dug into crisp white sheets, gripping tighter as sitting up brought a more defined view of my location.

It was almost amusing as I thought of how many times I had actually seen the airship's medical bay. I counted once, maybe twice at a push. A place I hadn't frequented despite being a medic in the vietnam war.

So it was a shock to my system to find myself in the medical bay on an airship I hadn't been on for about a year.

I was out of the ability to be surprised by the time I turned and found my fellow medic in the washed out sheets of the bed beside me. I found a little comfort in the fact he wasn't hooked up to the machine.

"Cherry.." My voice cracked, dry from lack of use. It didn't matter. He didn't hear me. He lay oblivious to the world. The lines on his face all smoothed out as he had found a place without worry. As I watched; his right arm twitched. Forcing the floral cover to drift of his body and onto the squeaky clean tiles.

He was dressed in plain black as if mourning, and his body seemed more slim than usual. Part of me wondered if it wasn't the fault of the colour choice. Otherwise he was the same man I had fallen in love with. My heart skipping as his chest rose and fell with light breath's. I turned away for a moment, my eye catching on his left hand as I did so.

I hadn't noticed it before, but now the golden glare it reflected was unmissable.

A gold band of ring. Nothing unusual about that except it hadn't been there before.

Unfolding my legs, I stood. Facing away even though the image remained.

I shook my head after a moments thought. Cherry wasn't like that. Most likely he had developed an interest in wearing a ring. It was a more than likely story.

So why did it fill me with dread?

My legs buckled under my weight for a second, the white hem of medical gown dipping low beneath my ankles before dragging itself up again. My muscles protested as I tested each one again, examining the skin for marks. There wasn't even one. It was the perfect recovery. Which made me wonder how long I had been dead to the world for.

I glanced back once more at Cherry's peaceful face, before smiling and inching my way across the sleek tiles. The door was open, and there was no point in waking him. So I might as well find the others and some answers.

The hall was dark, the curtains having been drawn across the French windows Cortex loved so much. Doors were shut, and although not soundproof; not a mite of sound passed through them. Each of my careful steps were echoed by the ticking of the grandfather clock standing with its back proudly against wood. The grandfather clock said 2am, but the desolate-ness of it all said otherwise.

Usually, it was custom for some sort of party to be blaring out its highlights around about this time. It wasn't a sound to be missed either. Not when the hall was only down the corridor with decks the size of mammoths.

My steps grew quicker and closer, as a new dread crossed my mind.

The wooden plaque's were carved into names as I passed each door, stopping at my own several doors down from the medical bay. The dread lifted an inch as the memory of it hit me.

The wood was a deep brown, with little flecks of chocolate brown engrained into its board. I had used a bread knife to carve out my name, taking hours because I had refused to listen to Coco's advice on what sort of knife was best for wood carving. I was proud of the result though. There wasn't a rough edge to see or touch. I raised a finger to stroke the smooth edge, accidentally pushing the door open a few inches.

And just when things couldn't get more odd, they did. None other than Hoss was curled up in the black duvet I had coveted when I lived here, eyes open but distant as he seemed to inhale its scent.

"Hoss?" The door slid open a few inches more under my fingers, drawing a creak as it went.

"Lessa!?" Hoss sprang up with a wild look it his eyes, one hand clawing within the material of the duvet. His gaze softened as he met my eyes, and a look of guilt crossed his face quicker than the shock left.

"Jesus, it really is you!" He rolled of the bed onto his bare feet and gripped me in bear hug before I could even blink. I resisted for a moment, smelling dark spices before I loosened my muscles and went limp in his arms. One hand rose up to stroke my hair, calming me further as the spices invaded my senses.

"You honestly don't know how much I've missed you Lessa. I couldn't be happier that your well again" He pulled back and held me at arms length, a huge smile filling his broad face as he examined me. His tone was cheery, but the words sounded filtered when they came from him. His sparkling blue eyes also carried an agenda.

"I've missed you too Hoss" I told him, stepping back out of his grasp. The smile faded.

"You haven't heard have you?"

"Heard what? I've only been conscious for the equivalent of half an hour. You're the first awake person I've seen" The blue hue darkened, and he half shook his head, seemingly with conflicted emotions.

"I didn't want to be the one who told you"

"Told me what?" He shook his head again.

"Hoss, tell me. You know I hate it when people start something and don't finish"

"Cherry's married, Lessa. He found someone else"

"I'm sorry" Hoss said for the third time. I was starting to get sick of the words.

"Who"

"Lessa.."

"Who!" He clasped his hands together, drawing his eyes away from mine and staring at a crack in the floorboards instead. I had yet to install a carpet or even just a rug.

"Coco.." A hiss tore itself from my throat.

"I fucking knew it! That bitch!" It wasn't like I had doubted Nina for a minute.

"Lessa..you need to know it wasn't all Cherry's fault" I snarled another swear word under my breath.

"Unless she pointed a gun at his head and proposed, I'm pretty sure it is. You don't just get married for a joke you know!" Hoss stepped forward, hands out trying to reach me. To calm me. I leapt back like I'd been stuck with a electric rod. I didn't want to be calm. I wanted to kill the both of them. To think I had actually bared my heart to Cherry and imagined a future with him. As much of a future as you could have with a price on your head anyway.

"Sit down. Let me explain"

"I don't want to hear it! I've heard enough"

"You haven't" He stated matter-of factly, clamping both broad hands on my shoulders and steering me towards the bed. A hysterical giggle threatened to escape as I suddenly felt delirious. Surely this was all a bad dream. Once my legs were backed into the bed frame he butted me down to a sitting position. He debated inwardly for a moment before crossing the room to an overhanging cupboard and pulling out a bottle of tequila. It took him less than a minute to find two glasses and pour a more than reasonable amount in each of them.

I just watched as he slid a glass into my hand, steadying it with the other. I was fast losing control of the situation.

"About a month or so after you left, Cherry got drunk at the vicars and tarts party Nina threw and ended up sleeping with Coco who to be fair, was equally drunk.

It was our fault really, we said he should live a little. That it would only be meaningless sex. I guess we didn't really think he would do it" I swiveled the glass in my hand, sloshing the brown contents until it nearly spilt. What good friends they were huh.

"Anyway, it was only supposed to be a one of. Even Cherry agreed that. He loves you, you know.

I guess we weren't counting on the fact that Coco didn't see it that way. She became infatuated with him. Trying to get him alone at every possible opportunity. It took a month of him rebuffing her for her to realize he wasn't interested"

"I don't see where this is going" He sighed, then raised the glass to his mouth. Downing the tequila in one. As if he needed the courage to get through this. I followed suit, not that it made a difference. I'd probably need a whole bottle or more before I could even begin to look at this rationally.

"Coco decided to change tack. If honesty didn't work then deceit was the next thing for her. She'd already snuck into your room and slipped Cherry a love potion before we realized she was up to something. She didn't check how long it would last, but then she didn't need to. Cortex told us she'd picked the strongest one you made"

I shuddered, leaning forward and grabbing the bottle. Giving up on the usefulness of the glass and swigging from the rim of the bottle instead. Hoss stared for a moment, shaking his head and siding over to the cupboard for another bottle. I didn't bother to see which one. It was the first I had known of alcohol being in there in the first place.

"It was another two months before the two of them were down the aisle. Or corridor if you'd rather call it that. It probably won't be of any comfort but none of us went, except Crash who was obliged to pronounce them as man and wife. He wouldn't have done it if he didn't think Coco would throw a tantrum and force Cherry to run of with her. If that had happened we'd have never found them. He couldn't let that happen"

"Damn right he couldn't. I'd have castrated him if he had" The drink was doing the talking for me. Something I would probably regret tomorrow.

Hoss ignored me, pouring himself another glass of bubbling orange.

"Melanie brought you back about a week ago. We'd never seen someone so broken. I honestly thought you were dead.." Hoss stopped for a moment, almost sounding like he was going to choke or cry. Or maybe both.

"Anyway. Cherry saw you, he couldn't miss it. He snapped right out of Coco's spell. I guess that's how strong his love is for you because that potion was supposed to last at least six more months" I took another swig, trying to ignore the palpable pain in his voice.

"He wouldn't leave your bedside the whole time. He barely ate even though we brought him food. He kept blaming himself.

It wasn't until yesterday that he ended up collapsing from exhaustion. We didn't realize he hadn't been sleeping. I expect you saw him when you woke up" A tear welled up in the corner of his eye, drawing a trail down his cheek until it fell into his drink. I doubted it was for Hoss.

"I came and saw you everyday Lessa. Cherry didn't like it but he couldn't object. I held your hand and talked to you. I missed seeing the life in your eyes and the banter you brought to the table at breakfast time. I wanted to kill the bastard that did that to you Lessa, and I think that was the only reason Cherry let me be there" He cracked then. Dumping the glass on the side table so hard it nearly shattered. The tears fell thick and fast then.

Despite being intoxicated, my heart stirred at the display of affection. I hadn't realized he cared so much.

"Please don't blame him Lessa. It wasn't all his fault" He swallowed.

"I just want you to be happy" He shuffled his chair closer, taking hold of each of my hands and looking me dead in the eyes as the tears fell.

I had no idea what had happened to the bottle. But it hadn't smashed yet.

The next tear was the last straw, and pulling a hand free I wrapped it around the back of his neck. Drawing him closer until our lips finally touched. They were soft and wet; salty with tears. They were probably his, but I had a feeling some were mine now as well.

The world came to a surreal standstill as I followed my trait of doing things I shouldn't do.

I just wanted to be loved for this one night.