Overcoming Strength
Finding my Weakness
Chapter 2
Over the next couple of days, Zelgadis is keenly aware of a change in his companion's behavior towards him; that and the amount of bandit attacks. And for the sake of complaining, Zelgadis also finds it difficult to sleep in. Although, if anyone cares to ask him, Zelgadis would admit that the recent change in his friend's mannerisms towards him is much more alarming than the numerous stupid bandits that choose to attack Lina Inverse. With the exception of Gourry, everyone seems to ignore him. Amelia from time to time will grab at his arm in her usual fashion, but she doesn't talk to him nearly as often it seems and she appears uncomfortable. Could it be from the numerous bandit attacks? Zelgadis also notices that his friends are annoyed at him more often for no apparent reason. They complain that he isn't paying attention to them and is outright ignoring them.
What has he done to deserve this kind of treatment? Aren't they the ones ignoring him? Hasn't he been trying to be nicer to them, why the cold shoulder? Through it all, Xellos only makes things worse, fazing in and out of the physical and astral plane simply to annoy Zelgadis it seems.
After three days of bandits, and his friend's rudeness, Zelgadis begins to notice that something is seriously wrong as he joins his friends for breakfast the fourth day. As he looks around the table everything seems slightly blurry at first. Blinking his eyes, the world begins to come into slight focus as his astral vision tries to compensate. He can see the large magic pools of all his companions and he notices a strange energy emitting from Lina's hand. Zelgadis immediately identifies the power as belonging to one of the dragon lords. Why didn't he notice that before? He also sees a resemblance to the Lord of Nightmares in her spirit. Needless to say, such keen observations disturb him. While his eyes vision seems to be failing his astral vision is becoming sharper.
"Want some of my brisket, Zel," Zelgadis hears Gourry say, as the bigger man offers something blurry from his plate to him.
Lina's form ignites slightly and hits Gourry. Watching Lina's moving mouth, Zelgadis's heart nearly stops as he realizes that he can barely hear her. In a near panic, Zelgadis stands from his chair and moves his face as close as he dares in front of Lina.
"What?" Zelgadis barely hears Lina scream, she blushes slightly because Zelgadis's face is so close to hers. He kind of has a cute boyish face on him and she takes note briefly that his young face hasn't changed at all since he cured himself three years ago.
Outwardly shaking a little now, Zelgadis slowly backs away and lowers himself into his seat.
Everyone stares at Zelgadis, their expressions full of worry or (in Lina's case) cautious concern. Their emotions are easy to read for Zelgadis thanks to the astral plane. Making no move to say anything, Zelgadis merely turns his attention back to his meal and apologizes to his friends for his strange behavior. With eyes full to the brim with care, Amelia attempts to ask Zelgadis what is bothering him, but Lina raises a hand stopping her. Amelia makes a move to question Lina, but the red head sorcerer merely shakes her head. Zelgadis cannot make out what either girl says. Eventually, the group finishes their meal and sets out again.
As they walk Zelgadis thinks hard about what is bothering him. Without a doubt, Zelgadis knows that even though this group has been rude to him all week, he can still depend on them to help him. But first he needs to figure out what is wrong.
At lunch, and after another bandit ambush, Zelgadis watches Lina torture Xellos.
In Zelgadis's eyes, it looks like a black spiraling tornado is being bullied by a yellow and red flaming inferno. Admittedly, Zelgadis initially finds this show fairly entertaining, but it sorely reminds him that he isn't seeing them correctly. When he tries to look at them with his normal eyes, they look like a bunch of red, black, and purple blurry spots. His brain tries to fill in the missing pieces, but in order to do that, his mind automatically depends on his astral vision to make sense of it.
After Lina and Xellos' fight is over, Gourry walks over to Zelgadis.
"We're almost to Seyruun Zel, let's get going," Gourry says. Miraculously, Zelgadis can hear Gourry, but he resentfully realizes that this is probably because his friend is yelling. Just like Gourry has been doing for Zelgadis since they first met up again four days ago.
Right from the beginning, Gourry noticed that Zelgadis was having trouble hearing, so as expected, without explaining this to anyone, the swordsman began to yell at Zelgadis in order for his friend to hear him clearly. No wonder Zelgadis can hear bandits and Amelia's justice speeches just fine, not that he can hear anything else she has said.
"I'm going deaf again, only this time more slowly and not because of some spell I think," Zelgadis muses aloud. Gourry doesn't know what Zelgadis means, but mentions it to Lina.
Upon their arrival in Seyruun, and not running into anymore suicidal bandits, Zelgadis is immediately scurried over to the White Mages in order to heal him. One of the mages Zelgadis worked with during the chimera outbreak works closely with Zelgadis, comparing notes with him. As Zelgadis studies his assistant's astral presence with his dying eyes, he is interested to find that his assistant looks different from the other mages. It is strange that even during this stressful turn of events; Zelgadis cannot help but study the interesting occurrences around him.
His assistants name is Crowling and he and Zelgadis want to make sure that Zelgadis's body isn't deteriorating. It would not be good news to find that all of the chimera's Zelgadis has cured, and provided new bodies for, are in danger of their bodies falling apart.
"Sir, I've run every test imaginable," Crowling says, it should be noted that his assistant is yelling at the top of his lunges in order to be heard. "I don't know how to explain this, but simply put it appears that you're going deaf and blind. Do you think one of the strange items the bandits were carrying is affecting you?"
"I didn't know you had an assistant? Well aren't you special," Xellos says to Zelgadis from the astral plane. The monster has been following him everywhere, even here in the white magic capital of the world. Suppressing a grunt Zelgadis ignores the invisible monster and addresses Crowling.
"No, I don't think the cause is from a magical item, but more importantly how can it be that I'm going deaf and blind again?" Zelgadis says as he looks over Crowlings notes. Holding the notes up to his nose, Zelgadis can just make out what the parchment says. "I haven't aged a day since the experiment three years ago and now I'm going deaf and blind like an old man? Why would I start to age now? And I still appear to be eighteen." As his mind races, Zelgadis remembers Pokota. "Wait, is Pokota alright?"
"Yes, he is fine." Crowling says patiently. The concerned assistant wants to get to the bottom of this mystery just as much as Zelgadis does. "His body was created to be the age of a twenty year old, but since he is a strong black magic user his body is ageing the way it should which is slower than a normal human being. He might as well look eighteen just like you . . . but at least he is growing."
"First you complain about looking like a monster and now you're sad about looking so young," Xellos says. Zelgadis can imagine that the monster is wagging his head from side to side in mock dismay, but all Zelgadis can see of the monster is a billowing chaotic cone of astral energy.
Turning his attention back to Crowling, Zelgadis nods his head as he agrees with his assistant's opinion. The truth is that Zelgadis doesn't hear every word Crowing says, but he hears enough to understand and confirm the validity of Crowlings thoughts.
"Don't worry Sir," Crowlings says patiently. "None of the chimeras or other patients shows any of the signs you are exhibiting."
"While this is good news, it also implies that there is nothing you or I can do to fix this," Zelgadis says realistically.
Crowling doesn't respond, only looks away with downcast eyes. The assistance face is red, either it's from frustration at the situation or due to the fact that he has been yelling at Zelgadis for the past two hours in an attempt to be heard clearly. The two intellects continue to discuss other possibilities as Xellos watches quietly, but the two humans eventually call it a day. Not once does Xellos offer any useful information to the discussion; he merely watches them, repeats what they have said or states the obvious. Eventually, Zelgadis has had enough.
Standing from his chair Zelgadis makes his way to the door.
"What do you want to do," Crowling asks before Zelgadis can leave the room
"Keep at it, but for now I'm going to tell my companions what is going on," Zelgadis says. Grimly, Zelgadis doesn't want to accept that this is happening to him all over again, but he won't run away from it either. Unlike the situation with Ralnker, what is happening to his body right now, as far as he can tell, is not caused by a monster. Zelgadis sends a quick glare at Xellos, who is currently following close behind him. Briskly, Zelgadis enters the hall and makes his way to the dining room where he left Lina and the others.
As he walks through the halls and numerous rooms Zelgadis takes note of all the people he passes. They look different to him now that his eyes and mind are trying to piece the world together in any way it can. He also notices that the people seem fearful. Shaking his head, Zelgadis wonders how he is able to read people's emotions through their astral forms. While he has noticed that he can do this with Xellos and his friends slightly, Zelgadis hasn't considered the possibility with other humans. He also realizes that he still doesn't completely understand the emotions behind what he is seeing.
As Xellos comes to mind, Zelgadis quickly quiets this thought as he enters the dining hall.
"Hi, Zel!" Gourry calls out, waving a fork load of food in greeting. Zelgadis watches the others who offer similar greeting and assumes they are saying hi too.
Xellos follows after Zelgadis and makes his form visible for the others at the table as he takes a seat beside Lina.
"Before, I give you any information I have a question." Zelgadis says as he sits down. Turning his full attention to Amelia, Zelgadis continues. "Is Seyruun doing alright? And yes you are going to need to yell so I can hear you."
Amelia nods and begins to yell, it comes across as very rigid to Zelgadis, but he doesn't complain. If push comes to shove he can ask her to talk to him in sign language instead. "Seyruun _is_ fine. But _there _has _been a_ lot_ of bandit_ activity_ recently," Amelia says. Sullenly, Zelgadis realizes that all of the bandit attacks on their way here must not have been the coincidence of simply traveling with Lina Inverse.
"I think the people are afraid," Zelgadis says out loud. "I noticed that the people I've met with today are uneasy."
"How_ can_ you_ tell?" Amelia asks.
Xellos says something, but purposefully says it quietly making it impossible for Zelgadis to hear him. In response, Zelgadis clenches his fist and glares at the monster.
"You really can't hear well can you?" Lina says just loud enough for Zelgadis to make her out.
"No I cannot," Zelgadis says with sigh. "It seems I am going deaf and blind slowly, as if I'm aging. My hearing was the first thing to go and I estimate that it has been slowly happening for the past two weeks. Unfortunately, my sight is following suite. Everything is extremely blurry and my brain has been trying to compensate. Unlike my hearing though, I am losing my sight at a faster rate, so my brain isn't putting things together correctly."
Lacing her hands together, Amelia restrains herself from putting her clasped hands to her mouth in distress. All of his friends show concern in their common way, although as usual, Lina looks more annoyed and frustrated, choosing not to show the traditional signs of concern. After studying her astral form, Zelgadis can see her emotions clearly and she is genuinely anxious.
"For now," Zelgadis continues. "I'll be depending on my astral vision to see and hear. If you need to talk to me you can use the Tansaku spell, apparently I can hear things just fine through the astral plane. I do not want to resort to pencil and paper again." This last request is directed towards Lina, who used it a lot two months ago. Zelgadis suppresses a shiver as he recalls the annoying hindrance of trying to communicate with people using pencil and paper. Sign language is ten times more convenient, but Lina wouldn't want to take the time to learn it and Gourry probably couldn't if he tried.
"Why not make yourself a new body," Lina asks. The question is a good one, but it reminds Zelgadis of how bad his condition really is.
"Even if I transfer into a new body, there is a possibility that the problem would still eventually eat away at me," Zelgadis says patiently. "I want to be sure that this condition is not attached to my soul or astral body before creating another new body. A human body may not be durable enough to contain it. Of course, we don't know this for sure, it is only a theory."
Amelia takes Zelgadis's hand and looks up at him. Even with his failing vision, Zelgadis can still see her brilliant blue eyes. "Are _you _sure _there is _nothing we _can do?" she asks.
"Not right now," Zelgadis says. "Crowling and I still need to test a few things, if we find out anything I'll tell you more."
"Alright Zel, I'm holding you to it," Lina says. "In the meantime, Gourry and I are going to look into this sudden rise in bandit attacks. I thought for sure they weren't going to show their ugly faces for another ten years." Lina's blurry head shakes from side to side in disappointment regarding her favorite pass time. "Leave the bandit race alone for a couple of years so they can recuperate and it all goes to pot. This time they won't be so lucky."
Having spoken their minds, the group disperses and goes about their business.
Authors Note: Short chapter, but important since it presents the problem that Zelgadis will be dealing with for the rest of the story. Like an 'older' person Zelgadis starts out believing his friends are simply being rude to him rather than realize that he is going deaf and blind again. That and this chapter gives Lina something to do, fight bandits.