Kenny had memorized his ceiling long ago. Many nights spent bored out of his mind and staring off into space had made every spec and every crevice very obvious to him. There was a patch of plaster or something that had congealed in the shape of a heart and another that Kenny kept giggling at because it kind of looked like a penis.

But today, the ceiling offered something new. Something Kenny most certainly did not want. Seriously, how long had that spider been there?

"Fuck you and your creepy legs, spider." Kenny said and thrust the bottle he held in his hand up with gusto to crush the spider between it and the ceiling. The body stuck to the bottle but an ugly black smear was on his ceiling now. "Gross."

Kenny had called in sick to work after discovering the ugly purple facial discoloration that had formed overnight. He'd expected to be sore, but this was ridiculous. He was used to dying and nobody finding out, that was a regular thing in South Park, but visible bruising and scarring always caught attention and Kenny hated that more than dying.

Falling back down off the step ladder, he tossed the bottle and spider guts in the trash and lazily moved the ladder back to the corner of his room with well placed kicks and shoving it back with his knee. He'd been up for a total of...Kenny glanced at the clock...four hours now and he was bored.

He'd sent Craig a few text messages and kept getting 'Don't bother me, I'm working, unlike you' in return. The hum of his phone alerted him and he dropped heavily onto his bed to snatch his cell phone up from the covers. Sure enough, Craig had sent him something equally boring to his last text.

If you're really sick, go to sleep.

Kenny would have scowled. In fact, he tried. But it hurt and he quickly gave up in favor or holding the phone above him and taking a mediocre quality picture of himself pouting. A few clicks on the keypad later and he'd sent it to Craig with the caption, I AM sick, look at how miserable I am.

A second passed. And then another. And then several others while Kenny looked blankly at his phone and just barely resisted the urge to just play a game on his phone while he waited, but soon enough Craig's text would interrupt the game and then...

You always look miserable.

Kenny actually grinned a little at that and sent back, Can't tell if being mean or sympathetic.

Both?

Such was the nature of Craig Tucker.

Kenny could never tell via text if he truly annoyed Craig and it was a little irking. He could always tell with Kyle or Stan because they'd suddenly resort to using capitals to text-yell at him or delve into curse words that would put Kenny's parents to shame.

Kenny found himself scanning his contacts list and halfheartedly selected Kyle Broflovski from the list. Maybe just today he could use some over-protective friend attention to cheer him up. His parents were at what they called work, but was much more like community service sentenced for the rest of their lives until late tonight, so he was alone in the house. He wasn't sure where Kevin went, he never was, but Karen had agreed to stay at a friend's house and had some camping trip planned for the next week. So it was either alone or friends...

Hey, dude, what's up?

Kenny would take friends. Alone was boring and four hours had done very well to prove that. He barely had to wait a full minute before Kyle had sent something back.

Not much. Why you ask?

Kenny typed in two words and hit send before climbing up from the bed to get dressed. The phone hummed at him as he was pulling on a pair of jeans and the screen lit up with a preview of the return text. Which was really just the whole text as in response to Kenny's 'Come over', Kyle had simply sent back, 'Okay'.

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"You make such a good housewife, Stan." Kenny remarked, lounging over the kitchen table and watching his dark haired friend flip sandwiches on the frying pan.

"I practice." Was Stan's response, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

After Kyle had accepted his offer, Kenny had extended the same one to Stan Marsh, knowing that he'd come regardless but preferring to invite him all the same. Whenever Kyle knew something, Stan knew about it within the following hour. They were just close like that. It was something Kenny had almost envied. He'd never considered having a friend that close, but after having thought about it, he supposed Kyle was sort of like that with him as well. Not to the same extent, but Kenny still knew more about Kyle than Eric Cartman would ever know and had actually been the first, even above Stan, to know that Kyle swung for both teams.

Though it was fairly obvious now, as said red head re-entered the kitchen and moved to loop an arm around Stan's waist from behind. It was because of these two finally evolving their relationship that Kenny had even thought up the deal he had now with Craig.

"Hey, Kyle. I was just saying what a lovely housewife you have." Kenny cracked a grin, putting on a show of formal politeness.

"Isn't he, though?" Kyle said in return, poking Stan's side before moving to sit at the table with Kenny.

"You know, just today I was thinking 'Why don't I go over to Kenny's house more often?'," Stan started, an exaggerated tone present to his voice though he was grinning all the same. "And then I remembered. Because Kenny's a dick."

Kenny narrowed his eyes and stuck out his tongue, to which Stan returned by sticking out his own tongue.

"Now, now, children." Kyle interrupted their teasing and loudly pushed his chair closer to Kenny's.

"Don't you two be trying anything while I'm slaving away over here." Stan joked and it was Kyle's turn to stick out his tongue.

"I'll do whatever I want, thank you very much. But that wasn't where I was going with this, I wanted to see Kenny's bruise."

Kenny flinched as he saw Kyle's fingers close to his face, but he reluctantly let his friend idly poke at the bruise.

"Seriously, Ken." Kyle's voice had taken on that sympathetic tone he so far exclusively used when he was comforting Kenny.

"I know, I know. Don't get involved, right?" Kenny returned, laying his arms and chin on the kitchen table as Kyle stood up to rummage through his freezer. In almost practiced time, Kyle had wrapped a few ice cubes into a clean kitchen cloth and sat back down to press the make shift ice pack to Kenny's cheek. It really wouldn't help the swelling or discoloration at this point, but the cold seeping into his skin was enough to numb some of the pain.

"Well, if you've got my advice so well rehearsed, why don't you use it more often?" Kyle teased, gripping Kenny's wrist and pulling one hand out from under his chin to hold the ice in place.

"Because you know it's impossible advice." Kenny arched an eyebrow at his friend. "You've known me for how long and you honestly think-"

"I know you don't step down from protecting people, Kenny, I just really wish you would." Kyle interrupted, silencing Kenny. "I've had to patch you up far too many times because you're too fucking stubborn to go to the hospital or just stay out of a fight."

"So we've got the housewife and the doctor." Kenny said, unsure if he was more frustrated or happy that Kyle acted as his protector.

Stan sighed dramatically and returned with, "If he comes to me covered in blood and you've died on the operating table, I'd suggest seeing a REAL doctor next time."

"Hey!"

Kenny almost hated them for how easy it was for them to make him smile and he easily looped his free arm around Kyle's waist and leaned on his friend.

"Aww, for what it's worth, I think you make a great doctor, Kyle."

This was how things usually went. As Kenny rested against Kyle and felt his friend absently playing with his hair, he realized neither of them had had a really serious conversation in a long time. They defused the situation with humor; it was all they could do. Kyle could clean Kenny's wounds all he wanted and it still wouldn't solve the problem so making one another laugh had been the only other option.

As Stan served up lunch, Kenny actively tried to keep the mood up. He'd squeeze Kyle closer to him when he knew Stan was watching and even went so far as to make Stan feed him the first bite of sandwich, claiming it hurt too much to eat on his own. The latter quickly stopped when Stan made a huge show of serving Kenny the tiniest pieces of bread like he was a bird and a minor food fight with bread bits ensued.

It was after lunch before a serious topic was brought up again.

"Do you want to come stay with me for a bit, Ken?"

Kenny blinked at Kyle like he was an alien.

"Is there room?" He asked, to which Kyle responded with an exaggerated look of disapproval.

"It's a two bedroom place, we've got a big living room and if you don't want that, you can have my bed." Kyle said, putting the last of the dishes into the sink and ushering them both into the living room that was just as messy as every other room Kenny's parents inhabited.

"Never asks me to come live with him." Stan teased, playfully jabbing Kenny's side. "Feel lucky."

"Screw you, you always complain about my room mate, why would I ask you to stay with me?" Kyle said in return before looking at Kenny again. "Clyde's out most of the time anyway though, I don't think he'll mind."

Kenny narrowed his eyes and made a huge show of humming and pretending to think really hard. He could hear Kyle go, "Oh god." and could practically feel his friend rolling his eyes, but he continued the show, falling over onto the couch and finally responding with, "I guess."

Kenny knew that this was Kyle's best attempt at keeping him away from the violence at home and had Karen not already been in a safer place, Kenny would have refused. But he had no one to protect here right now and without Karen, home wasn't a nice place to be. So why not?

"Are you gonna cook for me every night?" Kenny asked.

"We order in a lot. Or Clyde cooks." Kyle shrugged. "I think he's much better at it than me."

"Kyle long ago mastered the skills of doctors and technology, he has no room in that brain for silly house work." Stan smirked, settling into the reclining chair that Kenny's dad had purchased on a whim but rarely every used.

"That's what I've got you for, sweetie." Kyle replied, reaching over to mess up Stan's hair, his tone conveying sarcasm that made Kenny chuckle.

"I feel like you two would make excellent parents." Kenny said, nodding as if he was agreeing with himself.

"And you're our adopted kid?" Kyle asked, sitting down on the floor next to the couch Kenny lounged on. "We take care of you enough, it works."

"Oh, oh, can I change my name to Kenny Broflovski?" Kenny raised his hand enthusiastically, even if the name kind of made him want to shudder. It just didn't fit.

"Why not Kenny Marsh?" Stan asked.

"We've already established you as the woman in this relationship." Kyle shrugged.

"Fuck you." Stan flipped them both off and Kenny laughed.

Though he teased about Stan, Kenny believed the relationship to be the opposite. Stan may have been more house oriented, but Kyle was definitely the protective mother type. The two would make great lesbians, but Kenny would never say that out loud...the two would probably punch him.

"So, you wanna go get a bag together and we can head to my place?" Kyle asked, bringing Kenny out of some very strange thoughts of what Stan and Kyle would look like as lesbians.

"Huh? Oh, sure. I'll be right back." Kenny said, pushing himself up and expertly moving over the back of the couch so he could get to the stairs without stepping on Kyle.

Taking the stairs two at a time, Kenny wondered if this could be a bad thing. Would his parents freak out that he was missing? Would they even notice that he was missing? He thanked the gods that Kyle hadn't made his moving out with Clyde Donovan common knowledge because even if his parents wanted to come drag him away, not many people would know where Kenny would be staying.

Grabbing his old school backpack out from the closet, he began to fill it with clean clothes and pajama bottoms. He tossed his car keys and iPod in as an afterthought. He might be found out by his car, but so far as he knew, Kyle didn't drive so without Stan around to ferry them places, Kenny would need his own ride.

Kenny descended the staircase with considerably more enthusiasm, happy at the thought of just getting away for a bit. He noticed, once he reached the bottom of the stairs, that Kyle had re-situated himself on the arm of the reclining chair next to Stan and called out, "Don't you two be making out when I get there."

"Shut up, Kenny." Stan called back.

Kenny gestured towards the door, backpack slung over his shoulder.

"Should we go? I need to take my car so I'll follow you guys."

Kyle nodded and the two of them stood up, Stan sticking his hand in his pocket to find his car keys. His parents had been kind to him and chipped in for half of his Passat, something Kenny had been envious of before he'd come to love his Tercel.

Kenny locked the front door on his way out, though he hardly needed to. It wasn't like they had anything worth stealing. His car was probably the most expensive thing here, even as a used car, and he slid into the driver's seat, suddenly realizing he needed to take it for another reason. Aside from just having transportation...if his parents DID get mad and couldn't find him, his car would be in danger of some serious repairs. He plugged the keys in and started the car with more vigor than he probably should have.

As Stan pulled out from the driveway, Kenny tried to stick close, not wanting cars to creep in between them and lose sight of where the hell he was supposed to be going, He'd only been to Kyle's once before when they'd first moved in to help Kyle move boxes of his stuff. Kyle didn't have guests often, but then again, Kenny supposed Kyle spent most of his time working or over at Stan's house anyway.

The place was nice, he remembered that. Spacious, though there hadn't been any furniture in it then so of course it was. It took all of fifteen minutes to get there and Kenny drove slow into the parking lot, trying to take in what the front of the apartments looked like. They were a sort of a light tan color with pale green siding and door frames, large windows and at least three of the floors higher up had small decks for each room.

Kyle leaned out of Stan's passenger window and called out to Kenny, "We're gonna park in the spot Clyde reserves underground, can you find a visitors up here and I'll get you a pass so the landlord doesn't tow you?"

Kenny waved to show that he'd heard and found a parking space marked VISITOR near the side of the building. He waited until he saw Kyle round the corner from the underground parking entryway before he got out and locked his car.

"So I need a pass?" Kenny asked.

"Yeah, they like to know if visitors stay over for more than a day cos if some random stranger just hijacks a parking spot for no reason, they can get towed away." Kyle answered, shrugging and pulling out his keys to unlock the front door. He headed off alone while Stan and Kenny waited in the lobby to wherever the manager must have had an office and he came back with a plastic pad that read VISITOR on it.

Kenny took it and ran out to his car, slipping the card under his windshield wipers before ducking back into the building as Kyle held the door open.

Kyle and Clyde lived on the third floor, one of the higher ones in the building since it only had five floors. The elevator was small and uncomfortable, in Kenny's opinion, but the building's interior was nice and calm, so he supposed it was tolerable. 315 was the number on the door Kyle went to unlock next and he let Kenny enter first. Now that the furniture was down and the place looked lived in, Kenny was actually impressed at Kyle's place. It was relatively clean, save for the bag of chips and an empty energy drink can on the living room table, not too far from an Xbox Kenny was sure Kyle had been playing before he'd invited him over.

There was a hallway that led in both directions before you entered the living room; one direction led to the bathrooms and closet spaces and the other led to the bedrooms. Kyle and Clyde's bedrooms were across from one another, but vastly different on the inside. Kenny peered around the corners, opening the bedroom doors while Kyle shoved his shoes into the main hall closet.

Clyde's room was dark and messy, clothes covering the bed like he slept on them...which, with how much Clyde worked these days, he might as well do. In sharp contrast to Clyde's room, Kyle had picked the one with the window leading to the front deck and his room was bright and in order.

"Nice, huh?" Kyle asked, noticing Kenny's exploration.

"It definitely looks a lot nicer when it's not in boxes." Kenny said with a small grin and closed the doors again, heading back into the living room.

"Yeah, the couch folds out too, so you'd have an actual bed if you wanted to sleep here." Kyle said, gesturing to the dark blue couch that Kenny promptly went to sit on.

"Ah, fold out couches. Saving poor people from having to choose between sitting or laying since forever." Kenny sighed contentedly. The couch was comfy. Soooo comfy...

"Don't fall asleep now." Stan said, sitting next to Kenny and leaning forward to sneak a chip from the left over bag. "Hey, they're not even all that stale."

Kyle sent him a withering look, but shrugged and settled onto the last bit of couch remaining next to Stan. He propped his legs up over Stan's and the darker haired boy smiled at him in return.

"Thanks for offering me your place, Kyle." Kenny said, knowing it was polite to say, but also knowing that Kyle's exact response was going to be...

"It's what friends do, don't thank me." Exactly that. Kenny smiled. Kyle was predictable when it came to these things, but it wasn't a bad quality.

Kenny relaxed into the couch as Stan reached over Kyle to get the remote to turn on the television. He didn't care what Stan put on, as long as no one kicked him off this couch. When had Kyle bought this and why hadn't he crashed here earlier? He glanced over at his bag next to him and pulled it closer to look for his cell phone. He turned it on and saw, with something very close to amusement, that he had a missed message.

Work is boring. Get better so you can be bored with me.

Kenny typed out a quick response to Craig and turned his phone off. He was going to fall asleep on the couch, he knew it, and a nap would be nice right about now anyway.

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Author's Note:

I'm going to try and get a chapter out every week. This chapter is to make up for last week and with any luck I'll get another one out before the end of this week to be fair :)