Author's note: Thanks for the reviews, alerts, and favorites everyone! It's been a while hasn't it? Sorry about that. (Deja vu?) I've been busy and I had more writers block. I've already rewritten this a ton of times. There has been a slight change in my plans. Originally, the story was meant to be entirely in Oz's POV, but I changed my mind and now you'll get to see some sections in Gil's POV. My main reason is to make writing the transitions from chapter to chapter easier for me, but it's also because I love Gil almost as much as I love Oz. (Oz comes first in my heart though. Sorry Gil. _) Pandora Hearts isn't mine! Please review~

Edit: Gil's age in chapter two has been changed from 20 to 17. I put the wrong age without thinking. I'll put a list of the ages of the characters on my profile later.

Chapter 3: Things I'll Never Say

Gil's POV

Flashback:Upon parting ways with Oz, I followed Glen into a room where I was confronted with the other three people who passed the bodyguard audition. My mind was occupied with thoughts of Oz and all the things I wanted to talk to him about until I was interrupted by the sound of a familiar voice. I broke out of my reverie, startled by the noise, and looked up to face three familiar people.

"Brother, are you alright?" one of the three, my heterochromatic, blonde-haired brother, wondered worriedly.

"I'm fine, Vince. I was just reminiscing," I assured him kindly.

"Gilbert, have you already been acquainted with everyone?" Glen questioned curiously.

It would be a bit difficult not to know these three. The only people who made it past the audition were: my brother (Vincent), my childhood friend (sort of) (Alice) and my brother's student (Echo). I knew my own brother and Alice rather well, but my relationship with Echo was pretty vague. Vincent told me that he was her tutor, but I never heard about him ever having a job. Lately, he's been somewhat distant and I couldn't help but worry as his older brother. Realizing that Glen was speaking to me, I nodded in response to his question while Vincent attached himself to me without my notice.

Shortly after introductions were made and Glen left us alone to get to know each other, all hell broke lose.

"Seaweed head, I heard you participated in the wrong audition," Alice pointed out with a smirk as she tapped her practice sword rhythmically against the carpet. "Are you sure you are in the right place this time?"

Before I could get a comeback in, Vincent came to my defense.

"I won't tolerate you bullying my brother."

Vincent swiftly pulled out a wooden sword to prepare for a fight with Echo, to my surprise, following suit. Alice's rude remarks were not unusual due to her strong attachment to Oz, and Vince was incredibly fond of me, so it was obvious that neither of them would be backing down from this hinted challenge. Echo's involvement only made the ordeal bigger than it needed to be. Honestly, Alice and I were not on the best of terms ("friendly" enemies then?), but Oz wouldn't be happy if anything happened to her, so I had no choice but to protect her.

It only took one look at my situation to understand that this was going to be a long meeting.

End flashback.

"Gil! Gil! Are you listening?" a familiar voice called out as I blinked quickly to break myself away from the memory.

"Huh? Oh, sorry Oz."

Shaking myself out of my daze, I recalled the fact that we were in the middle of a conversation about how everything went with our fellow group members. Although I was mostly out of it, it was easy to tell that things went relatively well on Oz's end. Naturally, the only sore spot would be Elliot's involvement. To be honest, the conflict between Elliot and Oz isn't even close to what happened with the other bodyguards. I shuddered at the thought. Maybe I should've auditioned for a part in the band.

"It's fine. Anyway, there'll be time for me to get Elliot warm up to me, so let's do more catching up while eating some cake. I heard from Break and Reim that there is a cafe called 'The Blue Angel' that serves really good dessert."

As usual, Oz didn't wait for a reply as he took my hand and dragged me out the door and towards the cafe.

From the window, I could see glass cases filled with a variety of presentable sweets. Looking farther in, I spotted Elliot and Leo seated in front of a piano in the corner of the room. Much to my surprise, they were doing something I never would've expected from them. Elliot and Leo?! Could it be that they are..? No. They're just friends. I'm probably just seeing things. I checked again out of slight curiosity to see them simply chatting now, and by the looks of their surroundings and mine, no one seemed to notice anything amiss.

Suddenly, like a tidal wave, my own feelings toward Oz that I've been harboring ever since we were children washed over me, masking my relief, even though I fully intended to keep it a secret to avoid hurting our friendship. Unable to rid my mind of such thoughts due to what I thought I just witnessed, I grabbed hold of Oz's wrist before he could enter the establishment and tried to direct him in the direction my apartment.

"Oz, why don't you try my baking instead? I've improved since back then," I insisted frantically.

He simply smiled knowingly, causing my heart to tighten in my chest, as he agreed willingly. It hurts. Oz still felt so far away and did not allow himself to get to close to me. Casually, he slipped his arm out of my grasp and followed behind without showing a single sign of what was going through his head. Ever since then, he's been reinforcing a subtle wall between himself and the world. I wonder if he still holds him back.

"Gil, are we at your apartment yet?"

Snapped back to reality, my gaze followed the direction where Oz was pointing to notice that I had been lost in my thoughts once again and that we had arrived at our destination in the middle of it. It was starting to get out of hand. While assuring Oz that was just out of it today, I escorted him inside and urged him to take a seat in front of the kitchen table while I prepared a simple chocolate cake for us. He shrugged and made himself comfortable before continuing to fill the air with idle chatter.

I need to focus on Oz right now.

"So, how did it go on your end? Break mentioned something about you becoming a bodyguard."

"I passed the test for it, so I'll now be one of the four bodyguards in charge of protecting the band."

"Who are those other members?"

"Vincent, his student, Echo, myself, and..."

I hesitated a little in fear that he may want to spend our reunion talking about Alice.

"Alice right?" Oz finished with a pleased grin. "She told me beforehand. The results came out a bit earlier than the band member list. We already celebrated her accomplishment, so tell me what I missed over the past ten years instead."

If Oz wasn't here to take note of it, I would've sighed in relief of my luck. Grateful, I placed the semi-prepared cake in the oven before sitting at the table alongside Oz. I was happy to fill in the ten-year gap with memories of what Oz missed during his absence. How I took up marksman training as a suggestion from his uncle Oscar to utilize it as a way to become stronger and how I went under Break's wing to study music as a hobby. I told him everything to make up for all the time we spent apart. Anyway, I didn't do much with my new musical knowledge, but Oz's uncle Jack did help me turn the music I performed into something tangible. More specifically, a pocket watch. About a month ago, I took the time to make it as a gift for Oz's birthday, but the end results made me decide against it.
Feeling nostalgic, I brought out a golden trinket that was tucked into one of my pockets and traced over the intricate designs with my thumb. Oz took notice of it and wondered when I got it. Bashfully, I admitted that I made the watch itself along with the music a few years ago with his uncle's help. The song title and lyrics were incredibly embarrassing, but it fit my emotions at the time I was making it. Gently, he opened the watch and listened to the melody that echoed quietly within the room.

"Gil, were you unable to send me this for my birthday?" Oz asked with a smirk as he pointed to an engraved message on the opposite side of the clock.

But that watch...!

"Um... Yeah. I didn't finish it in time, so I was planning to give it to you the next chance I got. Happy belated birthday Oz."

My face flushed bright red as I closed the pocket watch before pushing it closer to him.

Will he notice?

If he did notice, then he didn't take the opportunity to point it out. Instead, he clasped the gift tightly in his hand and then slipped it into his pocket.

"Thanks Gil. I guess I should get you something too. It's the master's duty to show gratitude towards his servant's services."

The role play game we played as children...

"You don't have to!" I insisted sincerely. "I was late giving it to you anyway!"

"Expect your gift in a couple of weeks. The band's first gig is scheduled to happen then, so you'll get it on that day."

He's always been so set in his decisions. Nothing I say will sway him. Nothing at all... Will that apply if I tell him? My voice caught in my throat as I hurried to retrieve the cake from the oven, so that it wouldn't burn.

"Gil, you have something to say to me, don't you," Oz pointed out in an uncharacteristically solemn tone.

My hands trembled slightly as I placed the baked treat on a plate I had out ahead of time while contemplating whether or not I should say anything. Would he be disgusted if he knew?

"Never mind. I won't pry into your business. You can tell me yourself later," Oz decided with a melancholic smile. "So, how 'bout that cake?"

Something about that smile felt like a dagger to the heart, yet Oz continued to succeed in masking his inner thoughts. He takes on so many burdens by himself that it worries me. But... I can't say anything yet. It's still too soon and there's also him to think about. The bane of Oz's life.

For the rest of our reunion time, we spent it decorating and eating the cake with a tense sort of happiness until it became dark. Although Oz insisted that there was no reason for me to, I walked him back to his uncle Jack's place and parted there.

"Gil!"

I turned to see a soft smile on my "master's" face as he waved to me.

"Let's go to The Blue Angel next time. My treat!"

A slight smile appeared on my face as I watched him disappear into the confines of his uncle's house.

Before your last day here, I'll tell you. I used to think never, but maybe soon would be better.

Done. Finally! I just couldn't stick to one idea with this chapter, so this is what happened as a result. Fortunately, now I have an idea of what will happen in the next chapter, but it still might take some time to post. Sorry for the trouble. *bows* Alyss makes an appearance in the next chapter~ Can anyone guess what Oz's present to Gil will be? I just want to see what you guys think it'll be. You'll see what it really is in the next chapter. Um... I think that's all I have to say. Bye for now~