A/N:
As before, bold is singing
And Maeiouxq is Ghirahim's Ex, but we'll talk about that later.
And HMS is Happy Mask Salesman
Vatti smiled as he walked through the back door of the Skyloft playhouse, balloons and a bag of candy in one hand and a smoothie in the other.
"Alright Vatti, you've had your little day of fun, now let's get to work!" Ghriahim said quickly, following after the younger man. Fi, Ducky, Alfred and a cop followed. "Now everyone be careful, this place hasn't been touched since the night of the fire."
They walked onto the stage, and Vatti started to speak. "No. Don't know, no, no.
"Don't know?" Ghirahim asked sharply. "Well, here's a place to start. How did he escape, when did he escape, what's his plan, and where is he?"
Vatti looked down, and then started tapping his foot.
"Vatti," Alfred said softly, causing the male to look up. "Use your words. What's wrong?"
Vatti stayed silent for a moment, and then replied. "In my head, it's a musical."
"…What's a musical?" Ghirahim asked, feeling a sharp pang on fear.
"All of this!" Vatti snapped. "And I don't' mean one of those stupid musicals where they redo old songs."
"I hear that." Ducky mumbled. "That stuff does not belong on the boards."
"Is that you new thing?" Alfred asked, sounding slightly confused. "You're just gonna sling around stage terminology?"
"Yes." Ducky replied, her voice deadly serious.
"Her tap dance teacher got her to audition for Shakespeare in the parking lot, but get this!" Alfred said, ignoring Ducky's grin. "It's not even Shakespeare!"
"We're doing Wall-E." Ducky replied, grinning as Vatti made the robots signature sound.
"Wow…" Fi said. "Disney is really running out of movies to turn into musicals."
"I'm thinking a classic musical." Vatti said, grinning. "It would get me going if you could just…perform a little for me."
"Per…form?" Alfred asked slowly as Ducky looked over at her.
"No!" Ghirahim shouted. "No, no, no, no! Talk talk talk now!"
"Ghirahim, I don't think that's going to work." Fi said. "The doctor said to handle her with care."
"Uh, guys?" Alfred asked. "This might sound crazy, but, I think we can pull this off. Does anyone play base?"
The cop they had with them raised his hand, and Alfred grinned.
"Officer ham and eggs, can we get a little walking base line?" The cop nodded, and Alfred gave him a high five as he walked by. "I can't believe it's not butt-er!"
"Absolutely not!" Ghirahim said, blinking as Fi brushed past him.
"Do you want to catch this guy or not?" She asked, going over to the piano where Alfred was now sitting.
Alfred started to play, then began to sing. "Vatti you're such a handsome guy and sweet guy's love to sing. And when sweet sirens lift their voices, they can tell me anything."
Vatti grinned, while Ghirahim frowned.
"Yeah, like something like this is gonna work before I strangle it out of you." He said sharply, turning towards Vatti.
Fi sighed, and Alfred frowned at the detective. "Ghirahim, stop it!" She then got off the piano bench, walking towards him. "First of all, that doesn't even rhyme. Second of all, he has every piece of this puzzle right here," She pointed to her head. "So why don't we put in a little time and effort, for this one thing."
"I'm not gonna do this!" Ghirahim said, pointing to the stage.
"Yes, you are." Alfred said, gripping Ghirahim's shoulders. "Because you can. Because this is easy! Watch this."
She then walked over to the piano, and started to play and sing again. "When you're making up a song, the words you improvise are never wrong. Just jam as many syllables you can before the break, you literally cannot make a mistake!"
"Well?" Ghirahim asked, turning towards Vatti.
"Haven't I done enough?" Vatti asked, grinning.
"You haven't done anything!" Ghirahim shot back.
"Maybe not yet." Fi said, and then slowly started to dance towards the center of the stage. "When you're working a cold case,"
"I'm not gonna do this." Ghirahim said sharply.
"And wanna start, where would be the best place." Fi started singing again, and Ghirahim repeated what he said before. "We can assume that Z would like to kill again, can you tell us where to begin?" She then dragged Ghirahim out onto the stage as he made sputtering noises.
Alfred then started singing again. "You'll find it might atone, for all the things you've done. You'll pay a bit back to society; you'll finally be free…well, figuratively."
"Would they name a pharmaceutical for me?" Vatti asked as he sang.
"We'll see," Alfred sang.
"It could be." Fi added.
"Not likely." Ducky finished, and then she and Fi started to spin Ghirahim around.
"Please don't make me do this! Ow!" Ghirahim sang, throwing his hands up in defeat.
Ducky then started to tap dance as she went up a set of stairs. "When you're making up a tap, you can do anything you like. Except for that." She added as Ghirahim began to tap dance as well.
"No you never, no, you never can go wrong now now!" Alfred sang.
Fi and Ducky then took over. "Nothing can go wrong!"
Alfred then slowed it down, and sang softly. "When you're making up a song."
Ducky, Fi and Ghirahim finished their dance, and when Alfred stood, Vatti quickly said. "Now make me a ballad. Just when my true love comes out of the fog and takes me by the hand."
"Vatti you're-you're killing me here." Alfred said. "You've gotta give us something, after all, all the-uh,"
"Art!" Ducky quickly said.
"Art we just…drummed up for you." Alfred finished, sending a silent thank you to her partner.
"Alfred," Vatti spoke like he was scolding a child. "You're the greatest psychic the world had even seen. I can't just tell you, it would be cheating!" He then added, "I can't give you more than I've already given."
"That's it!" Ghirahim shouted. "Lock him back up!" He then turned to Alfred. "I knew this was gonna be a gigantic was of time!"
Alfred groaned, throwing her head back, and then started to look around the ceiling, where she noticed Vatti's balloons that he had let go of earlier, and what they were floating in front of. "Wait!" She called. "I wonder what's up there."
Everyone followed her gaze, and then Alfred turned to Vatti shooting the older male a smile, which he returned if full.
"Z's lived here." Alfred mumbled, walking into the room with Ducky close behind.
"He couldn't leave." Vatti replied. "Changes, day and night. Nobody knew he was shacking up here. He was…the phantom."
"Billy Zane." Alfred said in shock.
"The other phantom." Ducky said.
"There is no other phantom." Alfred replied. Ducky shook her head as Alfred walked over to a desk. She then placed her fingers to her temple. "I'm sensing he's been here recently."
"You are so good Alfred!" Vatti exclaimed. Alfred then glanced back at the desk, then noticing a cast and crew roster, picked it up.
"Where is Miles Thornton?" She asked, noticing the two names on the paper that were still white.
"Miles Thornton is the show's producer." Ghirahim said. "We've got a home and current work address for him to California Theater." He then pointed to Alfred and Ducky. "You two hit the theater; I'll take Vatti back to the loony bin."
"And you might want to hurry." Vatti added as Fi dragged him out after Ghirahim.
oOo
"Miles? If you see him first I prey he's not on another bender."
"He's an alcoholic?" Ducky asked as she and Alfred followed the owner of the theater down the very extravagant stairs.
"Highly functioning, yeah." The owner let out a sigh. "I am trying to launch a show and a venue here and I've got a producer who suddenly can't keep it together!"
"So you own the place?" Ducky asked (they haven't been told he's the owner yet).
"I restored it myself." He replied with a hint of pride in his voice.
"Oh, so you say you're looking for new talent?" Ducky asked as the trio reached to bottom of the stairs. "From the local pool, perhaps?"
"No, he's not even sorta saying that." Alfred replied, turning her head to look at her partner.
"It was implied Alfred." Ducky retorted. "He's launching a new show, I'm up for another roll in another production."
"To play a mute cartoon robot." Alfred grumbled.
"I would play Burn-E, a small, but vital roll, where I change a light bulb outside of a spaceship." Ducky turned back to the owner, who let out a small nod.
"That show was a month ago." Alfred said. "They're not calling you back." She then turned back to the owner. "We have some questions for you."
"Like have all the roles been cast?" Ducky asked.
"This…just sad." Alfred mumbled, walking past the older male.
"We preview tomorrow." The director replied.
"Really?" Ducky asked.
The owner ignored her, instead turning to follow Alfred, who had already pulled open the white doors leading into the actual theater.
She looked at the stage in shock, her eyes wide and mouth hung slightly open. "I know why Z escaped…you're resurrecting Ripper."
The stage design was exactly that of the old play.
"Wait, you're saying Zant is out?" The owner asked, sounding confused.
"Yes." Ducky snapped back. "And you idiots are doing his play."
"No, we're doing a Jack the Ripper story." The owner replied.
"Which is his play."
"No, Z's version was crazy. We're using Miles set design, and the director Ben wrote this new script. It's a completely different show!" The director shouted the last bit as he picked up a script lying in one of the seats.
"Surly you can understand," Alfred began, turning around to face the older male. "How a crazy man might find this a bit upsetting?"
"Listen, the first time I set foot into this beautiful city," The owner took a breath. "The Ripper fire was a headline. It was tragic. But then I got to know more and I thought, well the concept for this show is incredible and deserved to be put on."
"He is right." Ducky mumbled as she read over the script. "This is good."
"Give me that." Alfred said, ripping the script from her hands.
"Question," Ducky said slowly. "This inspector character, do you think he could be…a female?"
"If I wanted to lose all my money, yes." The owner replied.
"This is pretty good…this song totally rhymes." Alfred said, looking up. "But don't you think the inspector should have a full head of hair and a reasonable sized forehead?"
Ducky ripped the script from Alfred's hands, and when Alfred went to reach for it, Ducky slapped her hand away. The two then started slapping each other, and then stopped with the script was ripped from them by a rather angry female.
"That's my script." She said in a rather snooty voice. She then turned to the owner, changing her voice to be laced with honey. "Do you have a sec?"
"Of course Janet." He replied.
"Audra!" She snapped back.
"Damn it." He mumbled, and then turned towards Alfred and Ducky. "You know, I want to be as…sensitive as a business man can be. These people up here, they worked too hard to see all their efforts destroyed by one…deranged person." He then fell silent, and his eyes widened. "…rain check." He then walked away, and Audra ran after him.
Alfred looked back at the spot the owner was looking at, then back to his retreating form, eyes narrowed in suspicion.
Back as Skyloft police station.
"It was the victim's house!" Fi shot at Ghirahim. "You can't use the hiding key!"
"The place was a mess!" He retorted. "And how else was I supposed to get in?"
"What is the matter with you?" Fi asked as the two veered off to their own desks. "You've been a sourpuss this whole case."
"Ah, see, now that just goes to show how well you're paying attention. " Ghirahim replied, pointing at Fi as she sat down. "I'm always like this…damn it! I asked for phone records! How difficult is that!"
Fi held up the phone records that had been placed on her desk, and Ghirahim blinked. "…oh."
"I had tickets." He said finally, taking a seat in the swivel chair.
"What?" Fi asked, walking over to her partner's desk.
"Tickets!" Ghirahim repeated. "To opening night of The Ripper, 7 years ago. Maeiouxq really wanted to see it. We were possibly going to reconcile, and then…
"The place burnt down and somebody died?" Fi finished.
"Yeah." Ghirahim mumbled. "She's not the most understanding of people."
"Unlike you."
"Exactly!" Ghirahim replied. "So I told her I thought she was being a little jerk, and she told me what she thought…and then our relationship was over."
"Ghirahim…ever since you broke it off you've never been happier."
"Yeah, I thought I was happy then too." Ghirahim grumbled.
"Ghirahim, let me tell you something." Fi said slowly. "Relationship's don't always have to be that fragile, I believe-"
Ghirahim cut her off as held up a hand. "Thorten's been getting phone calls every half an hour ever since Z escaped…we've got to figure out where these phone calls are coming from…hey, good talk!" Ghirahim then stood, and ran off.
Fi just silently nodded to herself.
Back at California theater
"Z broke out of the asylum, by himself?" Ben asked as Ducky and Alfred followed him backstage.
"Yes." Alfred replied. "But don't worry; we're going to bring this mad man to justice."
"He just got a little lost," Ben shot back. "He's not a mad man."
"I think we'll get a different opinion from the guy he attacked in the park." Ducky said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.
Ben slowed down as they reached the set, and his eyes widened ever so slightly. "Z…attacked someone?"
"Is this true?" An actor walked up, a look of shock on his face.
"Guy's, this is Chris Lamberth, he's been with us for both productions." Ben pointed to the man, and Ducky cocked her head ever so slightly.
"Lambert? Like the highlander?" She asked.
"No, Lamberth, with an H." He replied. "It's different."
"Not really." Alfred said, shaking her head ever so slightly.
"It just sounds like your saying it with a lisp." Ducky added.
"Or with a Dum Dum pop in your mouth." Alfred said, and then with a note of urgency "You need to change your name immediately."
"It's like calling yourself John Quan Van Damnit." The shorter of the two blonds said.
"Besides," Alfred then said in a higher pitch voice with a lisp "There can only be one."
Ducky pointed at her, an 'I told you so' look on her face.
"Who the hell are you two?" Chris asked.
"My name is Alfred," She then glanced at Ducky. "This is my partner King Moncut."
"Excreta, excreta, excreta." Ducky went into a mock bow.
"We're tracking down a serial killer who is probably pretty angry that you're doing a version of his show that he killed for."
"And maybe audition for the show." Ducky said. "Has the roll of the inspector been cast?"
"I'm the inspector." Chris said, sounding very offended.
"Sir, calm down." Ducky said, earning herself a glare. "I'm just saying, the show seems a little male."
"Yeah…It's set in London…in 1888." Ben grumbled.
"So you're saying females hadn't been invented back then?" It was now Ducky's turn to sound, and look, offended.
Ben opened his mouth to say something, but Alfred cut him off. "Ducky, relax." She said in a quiet voice. "If a female is getting cast on the show, I think we know which one of us it's going to be.
"What?" Ducky said.
Alfred then said in a very high pitch, way off British accent, "The fellow who can say, hey! Hey! Over here! Hey! That's quite enough of that…Ripper."
"Should we be worried?" Chris asked.
"Probably, yes." Alfred said, once again cutting off Ben. "The good news for you is that we're pretty sure he's going after the producer first, Miles Thornton…but nobody seems to be able to find that guy."
Chris looked slightly shocked. "Well I just saw Miles two minutes ago. He was going up the cat walk."
Alfred drifted her gaze upwards. "…no kidding. We need to talk to him right away."
"Are you sure it can't wait?" Ben asked, all three looked up to the cat walk as a loud scream rang out. The watched Miles fall onto the set, blood dripping out of his mouth, very much dead.
"Uh…tell him it can't." Ducky said quietly.
Back at Skyloft police department
HMS entered the morgue, his eyes lighting up at the unfamiliar face in the group of detectives. "A visitor!"
Vatti grinned.
"Well, hello." HMS smirked as he walked over to the purple haired man, but the police officer behind him pushed the smaller man away. "Well, thank you, enormous human being. Hopefully your husband doesn't mind you being in the same room as a naked man." HMS pointed to Miles body, which was thankfully covered in a white sheet.
"Oh, he's not my husband." Vatti replied, smiling at HMS.
"Well, in that case, how about two naked men?"
Vatti grinned, and Ghirahim rolled his eyes. "HMS…he's a killer."
This news only seemed to make HMS happier. "Agree to agree."
"Can we just hop to it?" Ghirahim asked, sounding very annoyed. "This one is pretty cut and dry."
"It is." HMS nodded then said rather happily, "Suicide!" He then glanced at Alfred and Ducky. "…am I right?"
"That's insane!" Ghirahim shot back, and then glanced at Vatti. "Relatively saying."
"The victim made no attempt to break his fall, the cat walk rails were too high for him to be pushed, and everyone in the back stage area saw him go up alone! Plus, he just kinda has a sad face."
"HMS A patient escaped from a mental hospital and looked up this man's name after re-writing a play that drove him to kill." Fi pointed out, trying to restrain herself from slapping the man.
"…well when you put it like that!" Fi threw her hands up in defeat. "Anyone could look guilty." He added looking back at Vatti.
"But think about this." He then clapped his hands, and the spot light above the table turned on. "Often, it's the opposite of what you might expect. Try to think too logical, you're usually incorrect." He then danced over to Ghirahim, and put his head on his shoulder. "Trust your wife has ever joined a dark religious sect. The opposite of that, the opposite of that."
He then grinned at Vatti. "I'm divorced."
"Stop hitting on the prisoner!" Fi shouted.
"He was threatened." Ghirahim sang, pointing to the body.
"Immetarial." HMS shot back, pointing his pointer stick at the detective.
"He was frightend."
"Inexact."
Fi ripped the pointer stick from HMS "You don't think he ran up there because he'd been attacked?"
Fi then slowly stepped away from the man as he hopped up on one of the many cubbies' that held the dead bodies. "Try to be irrational, you'll free your head from pains. Inanity is sanity, when dealing with remains. Think your wife was not with White Sox slugger Harold Baines, it's the opposite of that, he even left behind his bat."
"Will you stop you stop bringing up your cheating wife?" Ghirahim snapped.
"You do know that Harold Baines personally signed those bats." Ducky commented.
"The real question is who even still has a Harold Baines bat?" Alfred asked.
"All were trying to do is to stop Z from killing. He literary wiped this guy's name off the list." Ghirahim waved the play roster around before slamming it back down on the table.
Alfred stared at it, then (so not) stealthily slid it off the table. She then placed her hand on Ducky's mouth and dragged the struggling blond out of the morgue.
"Dude, every actor is back on for the show except the actress Midna." She handed the play roster to Ducky, who blinked as she read it over. "This doesn't stop at Miles Thornton. We gotta get out of here."
"But what if we miss something important?" Ducky asked, looking through the window on the door. Alfred followed her gaze.
HMS sat up on the table, his eyes wide. "Often it's the opposite of what you might assume. Think you're too full for Jell-O-, I can prove there's always room. Find your wife hot-tubbing with a cabby from Khartoum, it's the opposite of that. How do you sleep Matack? It's the opposite of that, it's the opposite of…that…"
Ducky and Alfred blinked, before they turned to look at each other. "I think we're safe." Alfred said.
Somewhere over the rainbow
Midna slowly opened her front door, shock filling her features.
"Hello Midna." Alfred said slowly. "I'm Alfred, and this is my partner GG Von Tron."
"Van Tran." Ducky corrected, waving at the red head. "Obviously you've never seen the show."
"What show?" Alfred asked.
"Who's that?" Midna asked. The crowed parted to reveal Vatti, who waved at the woman.
"That's Vatti." Alfred said, smiling.
"She's a serial killer." Ducky added.
"Is this safe?" Midna asked.
Fi shook her head. "Probably not."
Midna looked shocked, shaking her head slightly as Alfred spoke. "Midna, Z escaped from a mental physicality last night."
"I know." She replied her voice quite.
"Wait how do you know?" Ghirahim asked, shoving Alfred aside as he stepped closer to Midna.
"He called me." Midna replied.
"What did he say?" Fi asked, shoving Ducky behind her as she stepped closer.
"Not a word." Midna answered.
"So how did you know it was him?" Ducky shoved Fi behind her, who shot the shorter female a glare.
"He played the piano." Midna replied, a small smile crossing her lips. "His playing is more distinct than his voice."
"Let me get this straight." Alfred shoved Ghirahim behind her. "A serial killer gives you a buzz, plays some creepy tunes, and this doesn't concern you at all?"
"It…was my song."
Vatti gasped. "He wrote you a song?" He said, stepping in front of Alfred and Ducky. "What was it like?"
"Not…really mine…originally." Midna mumbled. "It was his first song, and he used to change the lyrics for me when I was feeling down." She smiled, and then looked up as Ghirahim shoved Alfred behind him…again.
"Alright, look. Miles Thorton is dead and Z's got you on speed dial, so I'm going to put an officer outside of your house till we find this guy."
"It's not necessary." Midna replied.
"Trust us." Fi said, stepping in front of Ducky.
"Question in the back." Alfred said, raising her hand. "All the other major players are doing the show…why didn't you get the invite?"
"The night of the fire was tragic." She replied after a pause. "Some of us had trouble getting out."
"That's tuff." Alfred said. "But you didn't answer the question."
A sad look crossed Midna's face as she pulled back her red hair, reveling a burn mark going from her cheek to her neck. "I didn't think I was right for it anymore."
"…cool…" Vatti whispered, earning himself a weird look from Fi.
At Skyloft police department
"So, here's something interesting." Fi said, walking over to Ghirahims's desk. "Midnight at Whitechapel."
Ghirahim tore his eyes away from Vatti, who was going through her candy bag. "What's that?"
"It's the new Jack the Ripper show." Fi answered, blinking when her eyes landed on Vatti. "And it's expected to do very…well."
"Why do you say that?" Ghirahim asked, his eyes landing back on Vatti.
"There are negations to go to New York." Fi replied, pointing to the paper she threw on his desk.
"What like off broadway?" Ghirahim asked.
"No, like ON broadway." Fi said, eyes drifting over to Ducky and Alfred.
"Really?" Ducky asked, taking the flyer from Fi as she handed it to her.
"Dude, we were playing music, how did you even hear that?" Alfred asked.
"Wait a minute," Ghirahim said, "The first production of Ripper was going to be dead upon arrival, and now Z's out of the picture, this play is on the brink of a financial windfall?"
"Yeah." Fi replied, crossing her arms.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa…Midna's on this list." Alfred said, looking up from the flyer.
Vatti ripped it from her hands, and started waving it around as Ducky lunged for it. Finally the shorter of the two snagged it, and Vatti frowned.
"Why didn't she mention that?" Ducky asked, flipping back to the page.
"Link," Ghirahim picked up his phone. "I need you to ask Minda two questions."
"Oh my god." Fi groaned as Ghirahim started walking away.
"Please ask her why she didn't reveal a damned piece of evidence on why Z might want to kill her."
"Uh, Ghirahim, can I call you back?" Link's voice rang through the phone. "I'm hearing something in the woods and I might have a situation over here." Link then hung up.
"Crap!" Ghirahim shouted.
Back at Midna's.
Ghirahim sped up the drive way, screeching to a halt and jumping out with Fi.
"It came from over there." Link said, pointing in the general direction of the woods. At the same time a figure in a sweatshirt came running through.
"I see him!" Ghirahim shouted, him, Fi and Link taking off.
Vatti, Alfred, Ducky and a police officer were left in the car.
"So how's your mom?" Vatti asked the officer.
The three ran after the figure, and Link managed to tackle him.
"Nice work Link." Ghirahim said, pulling out his gun. Link turned the man around, reveling an older man, and not Z.
"…what the hell?"
Back at the car, Alfred glanced at the windows of the house, eyes growing wide as she saw a figure walking around inside the house.
"Holy crap Ducky," She said. "There's two of them." Ducky followed her gaze, and they both jumped out of the car, leaving the officer and Vatti behind.
The two ran to the door, and frantically started calling to the girl. When that didn't work, they started to ram against the door.
"This is so much harder than it looks!" Alfred whined, clutching her shoulder. "I have a better idea."
Alfred came thru the glass door, letting out a cry of pain as she straightened. "…that was ill advised."
Alfred and Ducky ran into the house, meeting Midna as she came out of the bathroom.
"It was him!" She gasped. "It was Z."
Alfred looked out the now shattered door to see Zant running away into the woods. She took after, giving a quick 'stay here' to Ducky.
She ran into him, and they locked eyes. Zant's were full of fear as he started to sing.
"I hurt no one they deceive you."
Alfred stared at him before starting to sing. "Come with me, Z. I believe you."
They stared at each other for the longest time before Ghirahim called out Alfred's name. Zant, alarmed, threw his fist out, punching Alfred in the face. He then took off running.
Alfred let out a groan as she stepped back into the house.
"This is our victim from the park bench." Ghirahim spat, pointing to the old man. "That SOB used him as a decoy."
"That SOB just punched me square in the face!" Alfred snapped back, not really in the mood.
"Uh, I think we have bigger problems than that…" Ducky mumbled, pointing out the widow. They all followed her gaze to see the police officer hanging out of the car, but no Vatti.
A/N:
Here's the list of songs if you want to listen to them.
'When you're making up a song'
'Often it's the opposite'
'Into the woods/Hurt no one'