Chapter Twenty-One: Back to the Springs

Jack loaded all the children into the jeep after a quick plane ride and Daniel slipped into the front seat so Jack climbed into the driver seat and drove them back to his place. He was tired and ready to get back into his bed so they drove in silence. Daniel was still quiet most of the time, but he was doing his best to be happy with the children and he slept a lot. It didn't take more than five minutes for him to fall asleep in his seat on the drive home.

Daniel wanted to come home despite the fact that he had filed charges against Henry, so they were waiting to see if they were needed to come back and speak at a hearing but as far as Jack knew so far was that Henry wasn't contesting it. Henry had known in the hospital that he'd been caught in his destructive need to destroy Daniel, so for now he believed taking a plea bargain of some kind would get him a lesser sentence.

Jack knew that as much as he wanted to spend more time with his parents especially in the wake of his mother's acceptance of their marriage, Daniel needed some normalcy and so did the kids. They were learning too quickly for Daniel to keep up with what they brought with them to Boston, especially Zale and Zada. Jack left the teaching territory to Daniel and he was trying but his recent trauma was taking longer to heal than the bruises and cuts on his body.

Despite the kisses and holding each other when they made it back to the hotel over a week before, Daniel still wouldn't let Jack undress him or move to close despite passion. Jack had even gone so far as to lean in gently to kiss Daniel's throat and Daniel responded by pushing Jack away from him and going through a flashback which lasted for half an hour. Jack wished he could get Daniel to tell him all of what Henry did so Jack would stop pushing buttons for him. For now, Jack would keep his lips on Daniel's mouth where it didn't bring about hyperventilating and shivering fear. Jack remembered going through the same after Hathor so long ago. Before Jack and Daniel had known of their love and passion for each other, Daniel had suffered rape from a woman and Jack had been there with his younger friend every time he screamed or whimpered in sleep. It was odd looking back and realized that love had been ever present in their relationship despite denial.

So he let Daniel sleep peacefully as he found his way unerringly towards home even though Jack was sure they would need to find some place new. Though his house was large enough for Daniel and Jack, add six growing children and the place had barely enough space to bed them all down let alone space to grow into. Jack would broach the subject with Daniel when his husband was a little more prepared to deal with other concerns.

They made it home in short order and he roused Daniel gently, with a hand running through the shoulder length hair that Jack loved so much. Daniel's blue eyes fluttered and sharpened quickly, as if he was unsure of his surrounding and safety. "We're home Danny."

Daniel looked around, to be sure of what Jack said and smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

"No need of that," Jack said and squeezed Daniel's shoulder in comfort before the started releasing the children from their car seats and grabbed suitcases that seemed to have doubled while the children were spending time with Grandpapa and Grandmother. Jack heaved at the weight of them and dragged them inside where Daniel was standing in the entryway just staring into the house that had become his home.

"Danny, you okay?" Jack whispered, hating the way Daniel flinched anyway.

"Yeah Jack I'm fine."

"I'm not going to let anyone hurt you like that again," Jack whispered as he hugged Daniel close to him for a second.

"Don't make promises you have no ability to keep."

Jack snorted hiding hurt behind humor; "You underestimate my abilities after all these years?"

"No of course not," Daniel started but stuttered at the end while Jack turned and continued to the living room to carry the bags to the couch. He continued to the den and found the room completely turned into a bedroom instead of having a couch shoved in there as well, Jack smiled thinking of Sam and Teal'c coming here to do this for them. There was a spare bedroom upstairs and since there were three beds here, Jack was sure the same would be said for the spare bedroom upstairs. He would have to talk to Daniel about who should stay close to them but Johnny should of course be close by for now.

He returned to help the children out of coats as weariness dragged them into the house slowly. Jack looked around, wondering why Daniel wasn't helping when he looked out the front door only to find the Jeep gone again.

"Dammit Daniel!" Jack whispered as he stood to slam the door and turned back to care for the children, seeing them to dinner and bed before they fell asleep at the table or on their feet. He'd been hoping to do the same with Daniel but his husband seemed determined to never do anything the way he used to.

"Daddy's going to work," Zale said tiredly as Jack slipped the cover over his son shoulders.

"Why do you say that?" Jack asked gently.

"I heard him think it as he rubbed a hand across my neck. He needed space. From us Papa?"

Jack kissed his son on the head, "No Zale, I think Daddy's having a hard time with me. He will always love you and your siblings no matter what's going on between him and me."

Zale nodded and snuggled deep into his pillow and Jack moved on to Johnny and Greer. Akina and William's son was mostly quiet but he'd clearly taken control from his magical counterpart but being away from family had turned the sweet little boy laconic and silent.

Daniel had been doing what he could to bring Greer out of his shell before the attack but since, he'd returned to this quiet version. Zale and Johnny were constantly playing with him and there were smiles every once in a while. After they were calmly laid down to rest, Jack returned to the den and kissed each of the girls individually before he slipped into the kitchen and sat down at the table and picked up his phone and dialed the Mountain, General Hammond's line and the man picked up instead of his machine which is what Jack was expecting.

"Hello George, I figured you'd be at home and I could speak to someone in the office," Jack hedged.

"Sure, Jack. Daniel is here," Hammond said, getting right to the heart of why Jack called.

"Thanks sir, please don't let him stay all that long if that's at all possible."

"Why is he here Jack?" George asked him gently.

Jack sighed, "I don't know George. We just got home and I said I was going to protect him and he took off. I don't know if we can make it through this unscathed. He won't let me find a way through the sadness and now we're home and he can hide at the mountain."

"Jack, I know you two are going to get through this. I will send him home shortly."

"Thanks George, I'm sorry all we have brought home with us is drama and chaos," Jack said as he rubbed at his eyes tiredly.

"You want me to transfer you to his office and see if he'll pick up?" George asked.

"I don't think I can handle the hurt if he denies my call, I'll just wait till he gets home."

"Okay Jack, I will have him escorted off the premises if need be."

Jack snorted, "Like that has ever worked with Daniel."

George shared the laugh before they hung up.

"Come home Danny," Jack whispered before he stood with a heavy sigh and walked back upstairs and tucked himself into a very large and very empty bed. He didn't even get undressed, just flopped into bed and snuggled into Daniel's side of the bed hoping against ridiculous hope that it would carry a little of his scent but there was nothing but the scent of clean linens to greet him.

"Doctor Jackson," General Hammond spoke as he entered Daniel's office. Daniel looked up from his translation to smile a little at the General.

"General," Daniel responded. "What can I do for you?"

"I got a call just a little while ago from a very disturbed husband, can you imagine who he was calling for?"

"Sam?" Daniel asked innocently.

George walked into the room and sat down in one of the chairs that always sat in front of Daniel's desk, "Talk to me Daniel, Jack is worried and he doesn't do worried very well."

"General, I can't do this anymore. I can't keep hurting Jack and I can't allow my thoughts to hurt our children. I just need to take a break from everything."

"Have you talked to Jack about what happened to you? Let him in to help you get through the attack?"

Daniel shrugged, playing with his pencil gently twirling it between his fingers. "I don't know how, before when it was Hathor it never really bothered me too badly because I was in love with Jack. This time though it was a man, because of Jack. I was attacked because I love him and I don't know how to deal with that. How do I deal with that? Plus the fact that our kids are constantly in danger of discovery and despite the relaxation of DADT, I will continue to be a target with the military and anyone who doesn't want open gay relationships to exist."

Hammond nodded, "This other place you were in accepted you as you were? Never questioned your right to each other?"

Daniel nodded.

"You can be accepted here too, but I hope you aren't going to give up on your life and family with Jack just because it is a little more imperfect and hard."

"You think that's what I'm doing?" Daniel snapped then sighed, rubbing fingers into his eyes vigorously. "I'm sorry."

"Convince me that you're not: go home and talk to Jack. Discuss this with him and then when I get a call from a happy General O'Neill, I will let you back on the base."

Daniel sighed, "Fine."

He stood and jerked his shoulder bag from the back of his chair and pushed around the side of his table. He nodded to Hammond before he left the room and then the mountain. He went through all the checkpoints and get to the parking garage all the while running on anger and not paying any attention to anything around him.

"So all the rumors are true, Doctor Daniel Jackson is back and he finally got Jack O'Neill into bed with him."

Daniel frowned and looked to see two airmen, their nameplates said Blake and Elliot. They were both captains from their insignia. "Hello, I'm leaving."

They stepped in front of Daniel, keeping him from the side of his jeep. Daniel took a large step away so they couldn't reach out and touch him. He didn't think he could do this all over again.

"Even we, new recruits at the time heard stories about the two of you and seeing you now, its not hard to see what he would see in you, even if it would have sent him to prison not so long ago," Nameplate Blake said.

Daniel shook his head, "What are you talking about?"

"The world at large might now be okay with fags in the military but he was just awarded General and he's sleeping with you. It's a disgrace."

"Be that as it may, it has nothing to do with you so just leave me alone."

Blake and Elliot shared a malicious laugh, Elliot stepping closer to Daniel, reaching out and stroking a hand through Daniel's long hair and set his hand into a fist so Daniel couldn't pull away. Daniel's hand tightened around his bag and tried to pull away from Elliot's grip. Blake moved around to Daniel's other side and they crowded him close.

"Get away from me," Daniel hissed and just as Black reached to touch Daniel as well. Then he did what he wished he could have done when Henry assaulted him, he let his fists fly. He caught Blake in the stomach and Elliot across the chin and Daniel hissed in pain when Elliot pulled hard on Daniel's hair before he released the strands.

Before they could regroup Daniel tried to run to the jeep when Elliot grabbed him at the back of the neck and slammed Daniel against the side of the jeep. His head slammed into the frame of the vehicle, bringing tears to his eyes and stumbling breath fell from his mouth. He didn't let the pain to stop him, as Jack had taught him for years. Daniel pulled the hands from his neck and flipped Elliot to the ground. He kicked Elliot in the stomach a couple times to subdue him enough to get away from the attacker. Blake used his distraction to sucker punch Daniel in the stomach, causing him to heave in a pained breath before he pushed himself back into a standing position fast enough to head butt Blake in the face. Then as he shook off the dizziness from the strike Daniel took off for the Jeep, pulling keys and unlocking the door, hurrying into the vehicle and locking them on the other side of it. Not expecting one of them to pull his weapon until the shot resounded in the parking lot, shattering the windows of the jeep and pushing the glass in to pierce at Daniel's face and neck but he refused to allow them another shot as he threw the started car into reverse and back out of the space only to rush the car into the drive and escaped the mountain parking lot before he headed back to Jack's, feeling the tears trickle down his eyelids. He sobbed, wishing he could place a hand on his face to check the blood and glass that he figured marred the skin there.

He screamed in frustrated agony as he drove then forced himself to focus on getting to the place he called home and pulled into the driveway, turning off the headlights and throwing himself into darkness just as Jack threw open the front door. Daniel jerked the car door open and stumbled from the driver seat towards Jack, falling into his chest as they came together.

"Danny what happened to you?"

"Jack, help."

Daniel walked into the house with Jack's arms wrapped around him and they settled in the kitchen where Jack threw on all the lights and took a good look at Daniel, his raw skin on the left side and the pained gasps he was sucking into lungs.

"Daniel, what happened?" Jack asked again as he fumbled around for tweezers and alcohol. Jack sat down next to Daniel and the slow process of cleaning his face and neck began.

"I was attacked in the parking garage, by a couple of Captains, Blake and Elliot."

"What? Danny, are you serious?"

"You think I'm lying or something?" Daniel snapped annoyed and hissing as Jack pulled out another shard. Jack soothed him gently and Daniel tried to push the other man's hands away but Jack wouldn't let him.

"Of course I don't, I'm just upset that you were hurt again when I wasn't there to help you or do something about it."

"Jack, we went through this back in the Vannas world. I am a grown up and I can take care of myself if I need to. You can't always be there to take care of me," Daniel snapped.

"I know Daniel, I just wish you were going to be safe here but it seems like I am destined to watch you take the brunt of people's hatred."

Jack cleaned the last of the shards, pressed some ointment to the worst of the cuts and lacerations before he turned Daniel to face him straight on. "Talk to me Danny."

Daniel pulled away from Jack's gentle grip and glared at Jack but then his gaze softened and he touched Jack's face, "Do you think I am going to leave you?" Daniel whispered.

Jack pulled away, surprised but Daniel's abruptness. "Danny…"

"Answer me Jack," Daniel returned.

"I think that I'm afraid we won't get past this. I'm afraid that you don't want to get past it with me. You say the words but you won't face your fears like you have done so many times in the past. I don't understand why this love, our lives together isn't worth fighting for."

Daniel gasped, not knowing what to say about Jack's words.

"Daniel," the archeologist flinched at the use of his full name on Jack's lips.

"Jack, I'm scared okay?" Daniel interrupted, "Scared that I am going to forever be a disappointment to you. I don't know when the flashbacks are going to leave me in your arms whole instead of shattered by what I suffered. I don't want our love to be so destroyed by the assault."

Jack gripped Daniel's hands in his, kissing each knuckle gently, "When have I ever allowed you to think I was not in this for the long haul?"

Daniel shrugged, "In this world its different and I know you love me and I love you. I just can't believe that I have been attacked twice now because of that love."

"Then we need to decide to leave the SGC together, I am a General and we can be taken care of."

"Jack I love my work, let me think about this before we up and quit our lives like we've already been forced to do."

Jack nodded, "Can we go to bed? Unless you wanna take the bed and I'll sleep on the couch."

Daniel watched Jack with a sad smile; his Colonel really would do anything to make sure Daniel was happy. He would sacrifice himself every time for Daniel and the children, and what was that but unconditional love? Especially when Daniel felt the same for Jack.

So he took Jack's hand and tugged his husband up the stairs and into their bedroom. Daniel slipped close to the bed and pushed Jack down to sit on the side of the bed. He reached down and pulled at Jack's shirt, tugging as he lifted his arms and pulled the shirt over Jack's head. "Danny, don't do anything you don't want to do."

Daniel smiled and moved to stand between Jack's legs and gestured towards the buttons on Daniel's shirt. Jack moved cautiously and pulled the buttons out of each loop so Daniel's chest came into view and Jack sighed when he caught sight of the colorful bruises on his ribcage. Jack reached in and rubbed gentle hands across the marks only for Daniel to jerk away from the touch.

"I'm sorry," Jack said quietly.

Daniel shook his head and slipped Jack's ever gentle hands back to his skin, "No Jack, its just a little sore from getting kicked."

Jack soothed his skin with gentle caresses and loving sounds as Jack leaned in close to place kisses on Daniel's chest. Daniel sucked in a breath but moved closer to Jack's body heat. He didn't see anything in his mind to keep him from Jack's loving touch. He waited for Jack to reach for his pants, his belt as he usually would be doing by now but Jack just kept on touching his chest and pushing the garment off of his shoulders and down his arm. Daniel closed his eyes and just felt the sensation of Jack's blunt fingers slipping along his skin, at his collarbone and up and over his shoulder in wake of the fabric so when Jack reached Daniel's hands he took them gently in his. Daniel waited for Jack to move on to the next garment but again, he didn't move, just brought Daniel's hands up so he could kiss Daniel's palms. Daniel opened his eyes and looked down at Jack who was returning his gaze.

"Please help me Jack, I can't find my way back without you." Daniel spoke quietly and leaned down to kiss Jack on the lips gently. He opened his mouth and caressed Jack's lips with his tongue as he pushed Jack's hands down to place them over Daniel's belt buckle. Jack gasped into Daniel's lips and mouth and started to pull on the belt buckle slowly, and Daniel just let the passion he always felt in Jack's arms and ignored the need to pull away. Jack was gentle where Henry was rough and hurtful. Daniel sucked in a breath as Jack's hands slipped inside to touch his cock and amazingly it was filling with passion.

Daniel moaned, "Jack please?"

"I know baby, I'm going to take care of you," Jack whispered into Daniel's lips. Jack didn't really use terms of endearment with Daniel, besides 'Danny' of course but it sunk into Daniel's skin to be Jack's 'baby' no matter how much it would bother him any other time than in heightened passion or moments of anxiety. Jack slipped the clothes off of Daniel's legs and feet, fumbling with his shoes while kissing Daniel's chest and trying not to release Daniel's erection. Daniel stepped out of one shoe and leg then the other before Jack pulled Daniel closer and slipped Daniel's legs over Jack's hips to press against him. Daniel sighed when he realized that Jack was still wearing his pants but Daniel didn't know he would be able to handle all the skin on skin so quickly. Instead he slipped lips to Jack's again, meeting tongue for tongue and reacquainted himself with his Colonel Jack once more. Jack's hands slipped down to grip at his thighs gently, one pulling him close so Daniel could rub against clothed crotch and the other wrapped loosely around Daniel's hard shaft.

Daniel slipped back just enough to stare into the eyes of his beloved, "You are wearing too many clothes," he spoke the words in husky whisper.

Jack leaned back down across the bed and Daniel quickly fumbled open the fly of Jack's pants and they both struggled to strip Jack of the rest of those barriers and then he was gloriously naked and Daniel stood next to the bed as Jack pushed himself back to lay more comfortably on the mattress. He watched as Jack stretched before reaching down to rub hands across his chest and down between his legs. Daniel wanted that hand to be his and he took a step forward and slipped down on the side of the bed when the thought in his mind returned to the place where he was pressed against the wall with no way out. The air wafting across Daniel's bare buttocks and Henry's hands spreading cheeks in preparation of the act he so desperately wished to complete.

Daniel faltered and Jack noticed, of course. "Danny? Love? Are you okay?" Instead of answering Daniel shook his head and slipped down to lay next to Jack. He reached out to slip palm against Jack's smooth and muscled chest and allowed himself the time and blessed agony of touching Jack. He took his time, allowing his breathing to calm and cool against the idea of Henry in this bed with each motion. He felt the heat that he always felt here, and leaned in close for another kiss from his lover. Daniel took a deep breath when he parted lips from Jack's. Then he slipped on top of Jack's hips, before he leaned across Jack to pull open his bed side table and pulled out the lube and handed it to Jack who quickly unsealed the cap and reached down to grip Daniel's erection. Daniel groaned but pushed Jack's hands away.

"Daniel?" Jack questioned.

"I want you inside me Jack, I need to know that here in our bed I am safe from all but you. I need you to show me the way back to us instead of constant flashes of him."

Jack nodded but his brows were furrowed in dedicated worry. Jack slipped his lubed fingers down and around Daniel's ass and slipped fingers into crack before starting to prepare Daniel's channel for him. Daniel closed his eyes tightly against the foreign feeling of flesh stretched after such a dry spell for the two of them. He tucked his head down into Jack's neck and worried the skin there with his teeth only to lave the hurt he caused. He felt when one finger became two and two became three before the flashbacks started again, Henry mixing in with Hathor and the devastating aftermath of those events. His mind pulled him back into that cold alley, the painful rub against the harsh wall and Henry's finger digging painfully into his passage.

Daniel couldn't stop the whimper that slid from his lips and Jack touched a hand to his cheek, pulling him away from Jack's neck. Daniel refused to open his eyes, too caught up in the past anymore, "Please Jack just do it!" Daniel said against gritted teeth.

Jack stopped, his hands removing themselves from Daniel's channel and flagging erection, coming to rest on Daniel's hips, "No Daniel, not like this."

Daniel nodded, his eyes still pressed close and he grabbed Jack's hand forcing it down to Daniel's ass again. "Please Jack," Daniel whimpered.

Jack pressed his hand against Daniel's cock, which had gone soft in the aftermath of his mind, "You don't want this right now Daniel. Don't force it."

Daniel pressed his face back into Jack's neck, sobbing into his skin as Jack settled his hands into Daniel's back. Jack shifted his hip and settled Daniel's body close to his side and Jack stayed silent as Daniel continued to cry. "I just want him out of my head, I don't want to lose you. I'm sick of this hurting you!"

Jack sighed, "Daniel, how many times will I have to tell you? This is not your fault and sex or the lack thereof is not going to make me leave you."

Daniel shook his head vigorously, "It's not just about the sex Jack, if I can't find that connection again then I won't feel safe again. Please Jack, I need this. I need you!" With that, Daniel struggled to pull Jack's hand back to his cock. He hoped that maybe if he could just get Jack's hands on him again then everything would be fine but Jack wasn't willing to try as he pulled back again. Daniel groaned in annoyance.

Jack's hand slid along Daniel's neck and he finally opened his eyes and looked into his husband's eyes. Daniel slipped into that loving gaze and waited for Jack to say something and as always Jack didn't deny him for long. "My beautiful Danny, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. We will get it back, I promise."

Daniel didn't know how to believe Jack, still feeling the crawly feeling under his skin where Henry's phantom touch still had the power to send him reeling. Instead he gripped the back of Jack's neck and pulled the other man close, pressing their heads together. Jack sighed all the while Daniel tried to keep the tears at bay. He whispered close to Jack's lips, "I love you Jack, no matter what my body says. I still love you more than life itself."

Jack nodded, with their heads pressed together both their heads to move, "I know Danny. I love you too, no matter what."