Authors Note: Hello, first of all I'm sorry for this kinda late update. I want to thank you for the nice reviews on my last chapter. Each and every makes me super happy.
This is the last chapter of the story. I actually planned a few more chapters but while I was writing this one it suddenly started to feel like the end of the story. For some reason it felt right to just end it right here. I was pretty surprised about myself.
I hope you enjoy the last chapter. I loved writing that story and I have already a few new things in mind!
Chapter 9.
One morning when he woke up he knew that it was more than attraction, more than the simple longing of wanting to know her, to be with her.
It was a Saturday and Kate spend the night. It was two weeks since they've first kissed; the third time that she stayed over night. That night they talked and kissed until two in the morning. They simply enjoyed the presence of the other soul next to their own. And when they were too tired to talk or to kiss they still weren't ready to be apart.
"I want to stay with you tonight," she had said, her voice not more than a whisper, hand reaching for his. The nervousness evident on her face.
He took her hand and she stayed.
Walking a step behind him he still embraced her hand tightly in his. He helped her crawl under the blanket, laying down next to her, pulling her into his arms. He remembered her warm breath against his neck, her fingers drawing soft circles on his chest, his own hand holding onto her hip.
He heard her mumble, "For some reason I'm nervous," against his skin, sending a shiver down his spine. Knowing her eyes were close and she was on the verge of falling asleep he kissed the skin over her eyebrow.
"We're just sleeping, Kate," he answered, wanting to make her understand that he didn't intend anything when he took her into his room; he was going to move at her pace.
"I know, and it's stupid," the words echoed in the room and the exhaustion within him slowly disappeared.
Stroking a hand through her hair he took a deep breath before saying, "You're feelings aren't stupid – it's a big step."
"Just hold me tonight and be there when I wake up tomorrow," she said before silence took them over. He wondered why she would ask that of him; he would not go anywhere. Her tired talking was more than just that. It was a reflection of her fears, the knowledge that sometimes when you open your eyes your life could be completely different from when you first closed them moments ago.
"I'm not going anywhere," he had promised and pressed her a little closer into his body.
But when he woke up the following morning it was not his bedside that had been empty – it had been hers. His fingers had tangled over the cold space next to him.
She run, that was his first thought. It was all getting to much and she build those walls he had been constantly trying to break down a little higher. Letting someone – him – in was something she was not able to.
A solid lump formed in his throat, making him gulp. But maybe he was wrong, there could be all kinds of reasons for her to leave his side; an emergency, thirst, hunger, her father or the human need of using the toilet.
Truth be told, he didn't know. That is why he got up, crossed his room and slowly opened the door.
Walking through the loft he hopefully expected her to sit on a chair in the kitchen aisle; coffee in her hand, smiling at him.
The kitchen was cold an empty.
That's when he heard it. His daughters giggles coming out of her room. His eyebrows ached in confusion as he went back up the stairs. Standing in front of the door he could hear them; Alexis and Kate laughing.
Cracking the door the smallest way open he peered inside. Her – Kate's – back was facing him and neither of them seemed to notice him. Too caught up in their game; each of them holding a barbie doll in their hands. The plastic princesses deep in a conversation about how pretty their dresses were.
And that was the moment he knew. Knew that all of this was so much more. Not because she was beautiful, extraordinary, strong, challenging or a mystery. No, it was more because he trusted her with his daughter.
And more so; seeing them together was easily one of the most perfect moments he ever experienced.
"Daddy!" the now five year old exclaimed after noticing him standing in the doorway. Getting up she ran over, letting him lift her into the air easily, kissing his cheek.
"Good morning. What are my favourite girls doing that early?" he asked running a hand over his daughters braided hair. Glancing over at Kate she still sat on the floor, holding the doll between her fingers, smiling at him.
"Kate made my hair. Look daddy," she grabbed her braid and smiled brightly at him. With excitement in her voice she continued, "And then we played princesses. She knows so much more about dresses than you do. And guess what, Daddy? She said she's bringing some of her old Barbie Dolls next time. Isn't that great?" Alexis couldn't stop talking and he couldn't stop the pride welling up in his watching his – girlfriend – smiling happily at him.
She didn't run.
She did the opposite.
"Daddy, I'm hungry," Alexis suddenly realized. "Can we eat pancakes?"
Letting her down he brushed her hair once more. "Of course. Will you be a big girl and get out the eggs and the milk? I'll be with you in a minute," and with that the little girl happily ran off, bouncing her red pigtails.
Slowly crawling off the ground Kate walked toward him. He couldn't help starring in awe. Moving closer she leaned in and pressed her lips against his.
"Good morning," she mumbled and he sneaked his arms around her waist pulling her closer. Her face was bright and he has never seen her this carefree.
"Good morning," pressing his lips to hers once more before continuing, "Someone seems to be in a really good mood today."
Biting down on her lower lip she blushed slightly. "Well, someone has a really great daughter. Who wouldn't be happy around her?"
"There you're certainly right," he whispered before dropping his head to her neck, placing a few kisses on her soft skin. She inhaled sharply against him, her fingers tightening on his hips, making him smile in return. He loved having such an effect on her.
Lightly, his fingers trailed under the hem of her tank top, palm brushing against the skin of her stomach.
"Daddy!" Alexis yelled from downstairs, his head shooting up in return. Kate giggled at him and he could just imagine his own expression right now.
"Come on daddy, make some pancakes," she pouted at him dragging him with her. Did she really just-?
"Daddy? Don't make me sound so old," he whined, only earning another laugh of her.
"But you-," she started but he simply put a hand over her mouth from behind, planting another kiss on her shoulder.
"Don't say it," he said seriously, but his half laugh giving him away.
"Are," she said quickly after he released her mouth storming down the stairs into the kitchen where Alexis was already waiting for them.
/
The day had been everything she wanted and more. After their breakfast they spend the day at the museum and watching Rick and Alexis making up story after story about the dinosaurs had been a bliss. There wasn't a minute she hasn't been smiling that day.
And when he asked her to spend another night she had said yes. Things at home were still pretty... rough and she was glad for every moment she was out of the house. Her father tried. She knew that but for some reason it wasn't enough. He went back to work and he was functioning but he was still drinking. Day after day.
Shaking that thought out of her head she watched Rick walking down the stairs moving toward her half sitting, half lying position on the sofa. He just tugged a really exhausted Alexis in.
Smiling he sat down, pulling her legs into his lag, massaging her calves.
"You excited for Monday?" he asked her.
"Yeah, I mean, I'm excited. It somehow feels like I'm finally going in the right direction since. You know. I still feel like I'm betraying her most of the time but I know it's just my head playing tricks," she said honestly. That's what she adored most about him. Her ability to speak her mind, her heart. And not feeling judged.
"She would be proud of you," he simply said.
On Monday she was starting a job. Just a part time Job at a small coffee shop but right now it was a big step. Even bigger considering the fact that in fall she would start taking courses at NYU. She wasn't sure where she would go in her life – a lawyer was all she ever thought she would be – but right now that was enough. After 197 days she finally felt like something was enough. She was enough.
She had some ideas but right now they were just imagination in her head not ready to be put out into the world. Right now, she just wanted to enjoy the evening with her boyfriend.
Boyfriend. Richard Castle. The author. But getting to know him she learned that behind Richard Edgar Castle was a big part of Richard Alexander Rogers.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked; she hadn't realized that she was lost in her own world again.
"Just that I'm glad you were such an annoying person that night in April," she couldn't help the smirk forming on her lips.
Opening his mouth he acted to be shocked, "Katherine, I would never, ever annoy anyone."
The laugh escaped her throat easily. It was happening more often these days. But growing serious she pulled her legs from his lap, sitting up. Facing him she placed one hand on his cheek, taking a deep breath.
"But really, thank you for saving me," leaning in she wanted to kiss him but he slightly moved out of her direction. Frowning she starred at him. What did she do wrong?
"As much as I'd like to take the price for this, you did this yourself. I might have been here but when it comes down to this, you're the one that pulled you out of your hole," he whispered, his own hand reaching out for her face.
That man, that handsome, caring, funny man. How did she deserve him?
"And I'm proud of you," he finished, making her blush in return.
Breathing in the courage she leaned in, mouth close to his ear, "Then take me to that bedroom of yours and show me how proud you are."
It was a big step and she closed her eyes after confessing what she wanted tonight. What if he turned her down? Saying she was too young and he felt uncomfortable. Maybe-
"Kate you sure?" he asked, making her look into his eyes.
Sure? About what?
Her life? No.
Her future? No.
Their future? No.
About wanting to be with him right now? Yes.
"Yes," she simply answered to to proof him that she indeed was serious she stood up holding her hand out for him to grab, "I finally want to live."
He accepted her offer, taking her into his bedroom, slowly closing the door behind them.
94 days ago she never would have thought that a horrible night with friend would turn into something like this.
She met him on day 103.
And as she stood in front of that mirror getting ready for a night out she never expected that day to be any different from day one to 102.
But it was.
103 was when it all started.
And now on day 197 she was excited for the future because she was slowly starting to accept her past.
THE END
Authors Note: What do you think?