Chapter 16: Cera's Inner Struggle

*Note: This chapter is from Cera's POV*

I wish I could've been able to move. But no, my foot was telling me that I needed to rest. Knowing it would be no good trying, I had no choice but to remain lying down. Then, a gentle, determined voice popped up in my head. "Come on Cera, you can't be hiding from your feelings any longer… it's time to start thinking about how you really feel".

I groaned. Normally I don't stop to reflect, but right then, I couldn't do anything else thanks to my foot. And besides, I had a decision to make. A decision that would affect me for the rest of my life. I sighed, closed my eyes, and reluctantly, began to think. It was so much nicer when he was there with me. Whenever he was by my side, I felt a special feeling of warmth that I've never felt with anyone else.

Then, a second, skeptical voice spoke in my head. "Don't be silly, Cera. You can't possibly be feeling this way. You two are friends, but you're nothing more than that. You're a threehorn. He's a longneck. There's no way you can possibly be in love with him."

The determined, passionate part of me argued, "Yes, but species isn't everything. It kept you closed to the possibility of befriending him for a long time."

"It's different though," the skeptical part of me countered. "Being friends with each other is one thing. But falling in love…threehorns don't fall in love with longnecks."

"But," the passionate part of me added, "Look at Ducky and Petrie. They're different species, but that doesn't matter to them. And besides that type of thinking is why you were so close-minded before you got to know him. You didn't want to befriend him because you thought threehorns should never play with anyone but other threehorns. It wasn't a belief you made for yourself, it was just an old belief that was passed on to you, but aren't you glad that you're not following it anymore?"

"Yes," the skeptical part of me admitted, "But that doesn't mean I'm in love with him at all!"

"Think carefully," my passionate part countered. "Can you imagine Littlefoot with someone else?"

I gasped as memories came flooding through my head. I remembered the first time I met Ali, and how I was instantly jealous that Littlefoot paid so much attention to her instead of me. And even just a couple of days ago, I still was very annoyed when Littlefoot went off to see Ali instead of staying by my side. Then I remembered how mad I was when I heard Littlefoot's grandparents talking about marrying him off, and how I yelled at Cam and Mia when they talked about marrying him.

"It's just because you care about him because he's your friend," the skeptical part of me countered.

"But," my passionate part nagged, "Would any of your other friends react quite like you did?"

"No," my skeptical side admitted. "But that doesn't mean…"

"Could you honestly imagine a life without him?" my passionate side interrupted.

I thought about that for a little while. I smiled when I thought about all the times that Littlefoot and I spent together, from our adventures to the Mysterious Beyond to our casual, fun games to the times where we just laid down on the grass and enjoyed each other's company. Whenever I was close to Littlefoot, I felt a special sort of warmth coming from him. His eyes, deep, brown and glittering like shiny stones, always looked so caring and kind and though I would never admit it, I always felt more secure when I was by his side. Then I thought about all of the sleep stories I had about him. As much as I try to ignore my sleep stories, I couldn't with the ones with him in them. They always provided unforgettable feelings… feelings that I couldn't bring myself to talk to anyone else about.

Then I remembered my last fight, and how determined I was to stop that fast biter from hurting him. I realized then that without Littlefoot, I wouldn't be the same threehorn I am today. Though I couldn't admit it to him, Littlefoot helped me overcome many of my biggest faults from when I was a little kid. He helped free me from the bigotry that my dad taught me to feel since I was an egg. And he showed me patience and kindness even in the toughest times, tempering my hotheadedness just enough to allow me to enjoy lifelong friendships with not only him, but also with all of my other friends. Without him, I would never have had those experiences, and I knew I would've ended up being more bitter and mad at the world. And to imagine the rest of my life without him… to imagine him being away from me forever, in some far off herd… that would be terrible. And to imagine him by my side...spending all of our lives together, experiencing life at its fullest…that would be wonderful…

"I love him," I whispered quietly. I gasped to myself, startled beyond words. I couldn't believe I said those words aloud! Hurriedly, I looked behind me to make sure no one was there. Luckily no one was, so I continued to think to myself. My heart was racing upon realizing this, but as soon as I whispered it, I knew for certain that I really was in love with him, and for much longer than I realized.

Sighing to myself, I closed my eyes again. The skeptical part of me then spoke in my head, "Cera, maybe you love him, but you can't really expect to go on with this. Your father is never going to accept your love for him."

I groaned with the thought. No matter how mad I was with Dad, I really cared about him, and I was beginning to miss him already. But I also knew that Dad would never accept my love for Littlefoot. I heard his ranting voice from yesterday ringing in my ears, "No daughter of mine will ever be. involved in a…in a…vulgar relationship!"

"Maybe you can't convince Dad," my passionate side replied. "But Littlefoot wouldn't mind this type of relationship. He was delighted to find that Ducky and Petrie were in love because he knew that they would be happy together. It wouldn't matter to Littlefoot. He's always so tolerant and open… also traits that he showed you in life."

"But if you were to marry him, you'd be exiled from the Great Valley forever! You wouldn't be safe from sharpteeth anymore, and you wouldn't be able to see your family ever again!" my skeptical side argued.

"But if you go back, it wouldn't feel like the Great Valley anymore. Ducky and Petrie are in love with each other, and since their love won't be accepted, they can't return to the Great Valley. Spike would follow them of course, since he's Ducky's brother. And Littlefoot? If you return, your dad will make sure you'll never see him, and that's assuming he won't be forced to join some far-off longneck herd. So if you go back Cera, you wouldn't be able to see your friends again, including Littlefoot, and it wouldn't feel like the Great Valley anymore," my passionate side replied.

I frowned when I thought about that prospect. I would be back where I started before I took that journey to the Great Valley, without anyone to trust or confide in. Before I met Littlefoot, I never was really happy. And I wondered, without him, would I ever really be happy again?

I shook my head, and I knew that I had only one choice. If Dad wouldn't accept me being with Littlefoot, the only thing to do would be for Littlefoot and I to live away from him and the Great Valley. Just one other thing nagged at me. "What would Littlefoot do if you asked him? If he rejected you, would he even be your friend anymore?"

"Of course he would, Cera," my passionate side replied. "Littlefoot is very loyal and tolerant, especially to you, so he won't mind if you ask him. I think something else is there, Cera, that isn't letting you tell him."

I thought about that for a moment, and I realized. "I'm too proud," I whispered. I always felt insecure with sharing my inner feelings and darkest secrets. They showed my vulnerable side, which didn't go well with the confident image that I always tried to show to others as well as to myself. I thought to myself, "I can't do it… I can't tell him how I really feel about him. If I give my heart to him and he rejects it, I'll never feel like the same brave threehorn again. He'll just think I'm being silly, and I'll be embarrassed of myself forever."

"Cera, you're always trying so hard to be brave," my passionate side replied. "This is your chance to show yourself that you're just as brave as you say you are."

I nodded nervously, dreading what I knew would have to come. Just then, I heard some footsteps behind me. Turning, I saw Littlefoot walking to me, crouching down to fit through the cave. He was carrying some pretty periwinkle flowers and he bent down to place them in front of me.

"I found you some healing flowers," Littlefoot told me gently. "I've been looking for them all day. They'll help heal your injury."

"Thanks," I told Littlefoot, and I slowly nibbled a flower, while keeping an eye on Littlefoot at the same time. My heart began to beat rapidly as he crouched down by my side, and I felt that refreshing warmth course through me again.

Littlefoot then pushed the rocks in front of us with his front feet, and abruptly, the cave wall crumbled, revealing a beautiful sunset overlooking a hill that was covered with pretty yellow flowers swaying peacefully in the wind, and a small lake at its bottom.

"It's a beautiful view," I told Littlefoot as I ate another flower. My foot felt stronger, and at the same time, so did my heart.

"Yeah it is," Littlefoot told me softly. The two of us just sat there, side by side, and looked out onto the hill and watched the dancing flowers.

As we stared out and sat very close to each other, I saw Littlefoot open his mouth, looking like he was just about to say something, hesitating, and then closing his mouth again. I looked at him curiously, for he looked just as nervous as I felt.

"Littlefoot, what's the matter?" I asked, my heart pounding with each word.

Littlefoot opened his mouth to answer, but then he shut it again nervously. He nervously sat there for a couple of seconds. But then he looked right into my eyes and he began to speak. "Cera...I've got to tell you something. I don't know how to tell you this, but…I really care about you. You've always meant everything to me, and… to this day, I always feel happiest when I'm with you."

I couldn't believe my ears. Was he really thinking what I thought he was? I looked in disbelief at him, and I asked him, "You…you really mean that?"

Littlefoot nodded, and his warm, gentle voice whispered in my ear, "Of course, I do… Cera…everything about you is just…wonderful, and… I can't imagine my life with anyone else. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that…I love you Cera."

My heart soared as I looked into his bright, shiny-stone like eyes, which were now sparkling with stars. I felt my eyes tear up with joy, and I smiled and stuttered, "I…I feel the same way, Littlefoot."

We smiled at each other, feeling so delighted that at that moment, we didn't ever want to do anything else but to stare into each other's starry eyes. Then, we slowly rubbed our heads together, closed our eyes, and we put our lips together and we enjoyed the most wonderful sensation ever imaginable as a great surge of warmth and happiness pulsed through my body. And at that moment, I knew that the two of us would always be in each other's hearts forever.