"Daisy, Daisy, give me your hand or two…"
"No, it's give me your answer, do."
"No, it's hand or two."
"Which is right, Perry?" Phineas asked as Perry ambled into their room. "Give me your answer, do?"
"Or give me your hand or two?" Ferb asked.
"I don't know." Perry said wearily. He flopped down on Phineas's bed. "Is that the song about the dude who tries to convince a girl she'd look better on a bicycle because he can't afford a carriage?"
"Yeah." Phineas said. "Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do…"
"Hand or two." Ferb said.
"I'd go crazy if I can't be with you, I'm thinking about our marriage, I can't afford a carriage, but you'd look sweet, upon a seat, of a bicycle built for two."
"I think it's 'I act crazy all for the love of you'." Ferb said. "'It won't be a stylish marriage'."
"Perrybear." Phineas said, poking Perry with his finger. "Are you awake?"
"Yes." Perry murmured.
He fell asleep a moment later.
...
"I want another baby." Prince said.
Perry shook his head. "No more. I have five. I can't handle six."
"You can handle two."
"Look. The boys are like my children to me. I can't commit myself to my own children, and I wind up feeling like a bad parent."
"I don't want Sneakers to feel lonely when I'm gone." Prince said. "And you're not a bad parent. You took care of her after she hatched. You were there when she hatched, even. Where was I? Stuck in the hospital."
"I'm sorry."
"Please."
"I can't."
The room began to float. Phineas flew in on a giant balloon.
"Its name is Remus." He told Perry as he flew past. A large clock nearly whacked him in the head.
The scene changed to Prince's apartment, late at night.
"I don't get why I'd have to tell you every time something happens!" Prince snapped.
"It's not like I'm asking you not to do it again. I'm just asking you to tell me!" Perry said. "Why didn't you tell me you kissed Malice?"
"He kissed ME! I blew him off because I'm in love with you! And I didn't tell you because I knew you'd get ANGRY!"
"Of COURSE I'm angry! YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!"
A cow floated through the room and ate the bedside table.
...
Perry woke up.
"Stupid brain. I've already experienced all that. There's no need for you to make me see it all again." He muttered.
He looked around. Phineas and Ferb's room was dark. The boys were both asleep in their beds.
Perry grabbed a piece of paper and ripped it in half. He wrote WENT FOR A WALK on both halves and placed them in the boys' hands.
Only Ferb shifted his position a little and murmured something about rectangles.
Perry crept downstairs and crawled out through the petflap. He walked down the street for a while before breaking into a run.
He reached the curb and stopped to take a rest.
"Hands where I can see them. Turn around slowly." Said a robotic voice behind him.
Perry froze with fear.
"Turn around." The voice said.
Perry slowly raised his hands and turned around. He found himself facing a red-and-white robot pointing some kind of laser gun at him.
"Oh." The robot said. "Your heatwaves were giving off a panicked signal. Thought you were up to no good. I guess I should use my eyes rather than my sensors."
The robot removed its head. Underneath was the head of a female platypus.
"Oh, and you're a fellow agent too. I feel really bad. Sorry." Without the helmet, her voice sounded very young and enthusiastic, as though she were happy to have something to be sorry about.
"Uh… that's okay. Thanks for not frying me. You're an agent?"
"Yep, I'm part of the O.W.C.A.S.F.W.C.A, O.W.C.A Special Forces Without a Cool Acronym."
"Owcasfwooca? You seem a little young to be part of that."
"I'm kind of advanced for my age." The platypus said. "I got a lot of intelligence from my parents. Anyway, my name's Remy." She held out a robotic hand.
"Perry." Perry said. "What's with the suit?"
"I'm not very good at fighting." Remy said. "I'm kind of tiny. So I made this suit to make me taller and stronger."
"You made that?"
"Yep. I also made the brainwave-sensing fabric that I wear underneath. I move the arms and legs of this suit just as a normal creature would move its limbs. Except I'm not actually doing anything with my real paws. They're just sitting in this machine." Remy folded up the helmet with her robotic arms and attached it to the front of her suit.
"That's… interesting." Perry said.
"Yeah. Some people find it kind of creepy at first, but they get used to it." Remy said. "Sorry I almost attacked you. I'm looking for the source of this stuff." She held up her robotic hand. A picture of green, sparkling slime appeared on a small screen in the palm. "It's usually invisible."
"I'm on that mission, too." Perry said. "The stuff that's making all the humans and plants go crazy, right?"
Remy nodded.
"Are you any closer to it?"
"No." Remy said sadly. "It's spread out everywhere, and it doesn't seem to lead anywhere."
"Strange." Perry said. "Ack, something wet just landed on my head."
He looked up. Nothing was there.
Remy put her helmet back on and wiped the liquid off. "It's that stuff. I can see it when my helmet's on."
"So… it's coming out of the sky?" Perry asked.
Both of them looked up nervously. Nothing else happened.
"I'd better get back home." Perry said. "Good luck."
"Thanks." The robotic voice responded. Remy stepped off of the curb and walked toward Downtown Danville.
Perry headed in the opposite direction.
...
"Perry, hold still!"
Perry tried to wrench his foot out of Phineas's hand. "It tickles!"
"Make sure you don't trim the poisonous claw." Ferb said.
"I won't." Phineas said. "Perry, stop squirming! Just five seconds ago you were complaining because your claws were too long!"
"Five seconds ago I wasn't getting them trimmed."
"Here." Ferb said. He took Perry's foot and trimmed his claws.
"How come he lets you do it?" Phineas asked.
"You have to hold his leg steady and firm." Ferb said.
"The only reason I wasn't holding his leg steady is because he was flailing it all over the place!" Phineas said.
"I have the magic touch." Ferb said. "Now that they're all nicely trimmed, what color should we paint them?"
Perry jerked his foot away. "All right, that's enough."
"A cheerful shade of neon pink?" Ferb asked.
"Very funny, Ferb." Perry said.
"I want a peach." Phineas said suddenly.
"Me too." Ferb said.
"Wait… a peach? Where did that come from?" Perry asked.
"I don't know. I just want a peach." Phineas said.
Both boys ran downstairs.
Perry sighed.
Whatever that slime was, it was working fast.
...
"And so we all agree." Peter said. "We must save the pandas."
No one was actually listening to Peter. Most of the animals were depressed about the strange things their owners were doing.
"Dinah tried to fly a kite upside down." Darren the duck said gloomily. "She was really mad when she couldn't figure out how to do it."
"Phineas and Ferb nailed peaches to their ceiling." Perry said. "I had peach juice dripping on me all night."
"Isabella tied all of her stuffed animals to her and walked around the house singing 'Row Row Row Your Boat' in Ferb Latin." Pinky said.
"You win." Perry and Darren said in unison.
"THE GIANT PANDAS NEED OUR HELP!" Peter announced. "WE MUST DONATE MONEY TO THEM!"
"That's nice, Peter. Just a second." Perry said. He turned back to Pinky and Darren. "I'm worried. They won't listen to anything I say."
"Hey, Lowe!" Pinky called to the fennec fox walking by. "You're a psychiatrist. Do you know why the slime is making all the humans go crazy?"
Lowe shook his head. "I deal with emotional problems for animals, not physical problems for humans. Ask me later for help with anything emotional, and I'll be happy to assist."
"Actually… I had this weird dream a couple of nights ago." Perry said. "Could you help me with it?"
Lowe nodded.
...
"…And then this cow ate the bedside table." Perry said. "So basically that's it. If I remembered correctly."
Lowe thought for a moment. He wrote a couple of things down on his notepad.
"Well?" Perry asked.
"Let's see. A balloon could symbolize the desire to escape from something in life. Did the giant clock nearly run into your head or Phineas's?"
"Phineas's."
"Hmm… well, to the cow… cows are herd animals, so it could be that you feel very alone. However, they also symbolize parental care, which wouldn't fit because you didn't want to try for a baby."
"Um…" Perry blushed. "Actually, later on…"
Lowe didn't make him explain. He simply nodded. "In that case, parental care would fit. And it would make sense that the cow was eating the bedside table. You feel like you're having trouble caring for all of your children. Biting off more than you can chew."
Perry gave a small shrug.
"You also may be feeling depressed and alone because you haven't yet made up with your girlfriend." Lowe said. "As well as lonely for your owners, who you feel are drifting away from you… as time goes on. I believe that is what your dream is telling you."
"It makes sense." Perry said sadly. "It's only a matter of time before there are peaches all over the whole house."
Lowe handed Perry a tissue. "You managed to get my father out of my hair." He smiled. "I'm very sure you'll find out what's causing this problem with the humans. I'm sorry if I upset you. I should have explained everything slower."
Perry shook his head. "It's not your fault. It's the fault of whoever is spilling this slime in Danville."
...
"Hi, Perry." Phineas said.
He was looking up at Ferb, who had taken every chair in the house outside and begun to stack them.
"Why is he doing that?" Perry asked.
"I don't know. He just said 'chairs' and started taking them. Ferb, what are you doing?"
"Chairs." Ferb responded.
"You know there were peaches on our ceiling this morning?" Phineas said. "It was really weird. I remember nailing them up there, but I don't remember why. What purpose do nailed peaches serve?"
"I wouldn't know." Perry said.
"You sound upset. Don't worry, I'm sure Ferb will put the chairs back."
Perry sighed and gave Phineas a hug.