Chapter 15 - The morning after the night before

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'Car keys, must find car keys.'

Bella let herself into the room, careful not to wake anyone.

The light was sparse, but she easily spied the two sleeping forms on the bottom bunk bed from the doorway.

The two of them looked remarkably similar when they slept; both with their mouths agape and completely sprawled out like a starfish.

She tried to ignore the feeling that was creeping up on her… but it didn't work. She recognized it as a strange twinge of jealousy, strange because she had no idea what had brought it on. She certainly wasn't jealous of the boy for getting to snuggle with Edward. No, that was not it.

The crying child had been a welcome interruption, one that effectively put a stop to any plans Edward might have had of engaging in post coital cuddle or pillow talk. Not that she didn't enjoy a good cuddle after sex, but she knew from experience that he tended to be very 'handsy' and needy of closeness afterwards. One hand in the wrong place and she'd have a helluva lot to explain.

The bump was noticeable now. Usually, she hid it behind layers of clothes, but another couple of weeks and it would be impossible to miss.

Just then, Anthony made loud gasping sounds in his sleep that sounded like something between a hiccup and a sob. Bella watched heart in throat as Edward instinctively, still fast asleep, tucked the child further into the crook of his arm.

The sight was sweet, but painful at the same time. Edward might not have accepted his new role in life yet, but that boy was already under his skin. She realized as she watched them that right there was what her jealousy stemmed from; their obvious sense of belonging. And it wasn't a new thing, either. She had always been envious of Edward and his sibling for their close family ties. They shared bonds stronger than blood, genes and bone structure. Unplanned or not, she already knew without a doubt that the Cullen's would have no trouble welcoming Anthony into their family.

Bella could only hope her own family would be half as accepting.

She had given herself until the holidays to tell Renee about her pregnancy. She figured her best option was to wait until they were all gathered for Christmas dinner; Renee, Phil and Phil's family. The more, the merrier, right? She knew Renee was less likely to cause a scene with her mother-in-law in the room. It also helped knowing that Phil and Renee were planning on leaving for Europe come boxing day. Her mother would have plenty of time too cool of before she had to deal with her again.

Charlie was next on her list. She'd visit him in his nursing home in Florida over New Year. Telling her father was more of a formality than anything else. Whatever his reaction to the news would be, he would most likely have forgotten about it by the next time she spoke with him.

There were days when he was completely lucid and others when he succumbed to bouts of delirium, and would ramble on and on about things that made no sense to Bella, or anyone else for that matter. Even though her father's body wasn't a year older than 62, his mind was lost in a world of hallucinations and old memories.

And then there was Edward… She knew she really should tell him about her pregnancy. She knew it really wasn't faire to rob her unborn child of the experience of having two loving parents over something as silly as wounded pride. She had to admit that her initial decision to not tell him had been both selfish and childish. Every child should have the right to know its parents no matter what the circumstances.

With impeccable timing Anthony choose that moment to make another discontented sound in his sleep. His little brows furrowed and his nose scrunched up as if he'd just tasted something extremely sour, but then he relaxed again and Bella wondered, briefly if the boy was as prone to nightmares, as she knew his father was.

The little boy was of course another aspect that needed to be brought into the equation. She would never forgive herself if she in any way damaged the fragile bond that Anthony had formed with his father.

It was plain obvious that Edward was still struggling with how to feel and how to act towards his newly discovered son. His heart wasn't in it yet. She had no doubt he'd make great father some day, but just like the little boy needed time to acclimate himself, Edward needed time to work through his anger and resent. The term baby steps had never seemed more fitting.

Problem was that she was running out of time. Her secret was of the fast growing kind and she needed to tell Edward soon, before he found out on his own… or even worse, found out from someone else.

The plain truth was that she wanted to hear him say that he wanted a future with her before she sprung another baby on him. She didn't want the baby to be the only reason why they gave it another try. She wanted him to want her.

Was that weak? Was that stupid? Propably, but she'd seriously hate to end up becoming an obligation and a burden. That prospect was almost as bad as a total rejection.

With renewed determination she concentrated on the task at hand; avoiding the awkward morning-after-confrontation by finding the car keys and getting out of the cabin before Edward woke up.

The best thing she could do for everyone involved was to focus on locating Anthony's mother. Abandoning a child was unforgivable, but the boy still deserved a chance to grow up with both parents in his life. And if she succeeded; no when she succeeded in finding this woman, Edward would finally get a chance to get the answers he deserved.

She wanted him to have that. She wanted him to have closure and permanent custody of the boy that she knew was already under his skin, if not in his heart.

If she could help him with that, if she could help him to come to terms with the circumstances surrounding the conception of his firstborn child, then hopefully he would be a lot more reasonable when it came to dealing with the impending birth of his second child.

Was that wishful thinking? Was she delusional? Probably, but it was the only plan she could think of.

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...

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Even though he was fast asleep, he was still somehow strangely aware of his of the surroundings; the bed, the room, the darkness. He was aware of the looming shadow in the periphery of the room and the alien set of eyes burning into him. The feeling of being watched was imminent. It tugged on his sleep addled mind for attention, yet he couldn't force himself to wake up.

About three things he was absolutely positive: First, his body was sluggish and unresponsive for a reason. Second, his clothes were askew, missing even. And third, there was a camera on a tripod recording his every move.

He tried to move, but a weight against his chest held him back, held him down and no amount of resistance eased the pressure. Fear ripped through his guts.

A thick voice slurred into his ears. It sounded familiar, but he couldn't decipher the words, they were all jumbled and echoing inside his ears and brain. Soon there were more voices calling out to him; begging to be heard, demanding to be obeyed.

Then something shifted. Shapes and colors flashed behind the darkness of his eyelids. The room was no longer a room. Instead, he found himself sitting in what appeared to be the front seat of a car and he wasn't alone…. Hands were on his chest, pushing, pressing, wanting something from him, something he couldn't give.

He felt trapped. He couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't breathe. He was suffocating, he needed air, he would die, he...

Edward woke with a sharp jerk. Gasping for breath and covered in sweat, he opened his eyes only to realize that the hands and the weight on his chest belonged to a sleeping Anthony, who was clinging to his shirt. Everything else, the camera, the voices, the car, he quickly chalked up to a nightmare and a particular lucid one at that.

He had been plagued with different variations of the same dream for years. The choking sensation was a new addition, though, as was the car sequence. He wasn't sure what to make of it all, but what he did know was that trying to go back to sleep would be an exercise in idiocy, so instead of even trying he carefully maneuvered himself out of bed and started his day early.

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...

"Come on, spill the beans! Why are you calling?" Emmett's voice was annoyed, but not without humor as he probed his brother for information. "Is this about the kid? Is this about Anthony?

"No. I don't want to talk about THAT! I'm so sick and tired of talking about THAT!"

"Okay, so what is it then? Girl trouble?" Emmett guessed somewhat correctly, but Edward chose not to take the bait.

"You're the one that's been texting me non stop for the last four days and now that I actually have time to talk…."

"Seriously Eddie, what's this about? It's seven-thirty in the morning and you never call just to chat."

"Seriously Emmy, " he mimicked, using the nickname his brother loathed "I didn't realize I needed a reason to speak with you."

"If you insist on phoning me at the crack of dawn you most certainly do. I don't mind having my morning interrupted, but your nephew gets über cranky if he misses out on his sleep… the same goes for my darling wife."

"Please, I can in no way be held responsible for your wife's mood swings. She has you by the balls and you wouldn't want it any other way…. " Edward sniggered, unable to resist making another jibe.

"You're just jealous that my balls are getting more action than yours."

"Hardly, I wouldn't want Rosalie anywhere near my balls," Edward snorted. "Look, I forgot about the time difference, alright? I didn't realize Elliott wasn't up yet. How's he doing by the way? I bet the itching must be getting pretty bad by now?"

"What itching?" his brother deadpanned.

"No itching? Well, congratulations! It sound's like you might just survive after all. But seriously you do know it's highly contagious, right?"

"Contentious? Oh, you're talking about Elliott's rash… err… Chicken pox…"

"What else would I be talking about?"

"I don't know. It's early and I just woke up…. " Emmett let out a loud yawn as if to prove the truth of his statement.

"Little E is fine at the moment, snoring like a lawn mover, but at least he's sleeping and not using our bed as his personal trampoline."

"And that's good?" Edward replied with uncertainty. "Sound's to me like he's not quite his usual self!"

"Everything is peachy, he just needs his rest, that's all. With a sick child it's more about clinging than it is about jumping, which I'm sure you'll find out for yourself soon enough"

"Great! You're such a source of knowledge. Any more wisdoms you want to share? Edward grumbled into the phone. "This is me being sarcastic, if you can't tell."

"Seriously, Edward, I know you're not thrilled about the idea of becoming a dad overnight, but Elliott is going to be stoked when he finds out he has a cousin. And while we're on the subject, where is the boy wonder? He's obviously awake or you wouldn't be up at this ungawdly hour. Is he there? Can I speak to him?"

"No, you can NOT speak to him. The only reason you even know about his existence is because Alice has a big mouth." Edward gritted out the words through clenched teeth.

"Come on, I just want to say 'hello'. I'm good with kids, you know."

"You'd only scare him. The boy is confused as it is. Besides right now he's watching TV and is actually being both quiet and still for a change."

"I've heard you've got your hands full. I've heard he's got your short temper and moody ways down to a tee. Karma is a bitch eh, Edward?"

"Yeah, well this isn't the first time that karma has screwed me over."

"Right, and you're not melodramatic at all. Speaking of melodramatic, I've also heard you haven't spoken to Carlisle and Esme yet. What's up with that?"

"That's not true. I actually had a rather lengthy conversation with them over the phone last night."

"Really? How did that go?"

"It went bloody fantastic…. NOT! You do not want to discuss the gory details of your sex life with the people that raised you, especially if it involves random hookups and drunken one night stands. Trust me on that one."

"Okay, I'll take your word for it. Your love life has always been a bit of a disaster area. There ought to be big orange cones all around you."

"Gee thanks! Now remind me again why I tell you anything?"

"That's just it. You never tell me anything, "Emmett whined into the phone. "Take this conversation we're having right now for example… I've prodded and I've pried, but not one mention of Special Agent Swan thus far and I'm seriously dying to find out how that's going."

"How what's going?"

"Come on, you know what I'm talking about. I want a progress report. It' know you're still hot for her."

Edward sighed long and loud. "I swear sometimes you're worse than Alice."

"And yet it's me you call in the wee hours of the morning when you need to went." Emmett quipped back without missing a beat. Then he seemed to have an epiphany. "Aha, I knew it! There is a reason for this call after all… Something that you're not comfortable discussing with Alice, something that involves a certain Isabella Swan…."

"And you think I'd discuss something like that with you?"

"So you admit there is something, then? Spit it out already. You know you want to tell me. "

"No, I've changed my mind. I don't wanna talk about it."

"Come on, you can tell me... Are you having dirty thoughts about her handcuffs again? Or is it her the gun holster that's got you all hot and bothered?"

"You're clearly lost all grip of reality, so I'm going to ignore everything you just said."

"You slept with her again, didn't you?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Yes you do, otherwise you wouldn't have called."

The phone line hummed with silence for a moment.

"Fine, I slept with her. Happy now?"

"It depends, are you going to give me some details?"

"No. It happened last night and it was a complete disaster! That's all you need to know."

"That bad, eh?"

"Not the sex… that was not the disastrous part. It's the aftermath that's been a complete mess The kid woke up and walked right into the kitchen while we…eh…It's not been a good morning, alright!"

"Hold up! First of all, did you just say you did it in the kitchen? No wonder it was messy! And secondly, the tiny tod woke up while you were still going at it?"

"No, no, no! I mean, technically yes… but no…were sort of already… eh done... if you know what I mean…," Edward paused and frowned. "We sort of, accidentally, knocked the coffee maker off the counter. It tipped over and fell and the crash was loud enough to wake the dead…"

"…or in this case the sleeping child," Emmett chuckled.

"Talk about mood killer. Instead of spending the night in the arms of a beautiful woman, I feel asleep with a cranky toddler crawling all over me. And that's not even the worst part… Get this, when I woke up about an hour ago she was gone!"

"Gone?"

"Gone as in AWOL. Both her and the rental car is missing."

"Dude, it's still early. She probably just went out to get some breakfast, or something, seeing as the coffee maker is out of commission and all. Has she left anything behind? Is her stuff still around?"

"Eh…yeah… not all her things, but some of them… Her computer is gone, but her overnight bag is till here. "

"Then there you go. I bet she'll be back before lunchtime. Unless, of course, you lied about the fab sex part and the whole thing was more like a complete disaster."

"No, it was pretty darn…. " Edward exhaled sharply and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Wait you're not tricking me into giving you any more details. It was good alright! That's all I have to say about it!"

"Hurricane Edward strikes again! Were are those orange cones when you need them…"

"Not funny! I knew I shouldn't have told you anything. I'm hanging up right now!" Edward took the phone away from his ear.

"Wait!"

"What?"

"Before you hang up, don't you want to know why I called?" his brother asked innocently.

"What are you talking about? You didn't call me, I called you."

"Details, details… I would have called, but you beat me to it. I have a message to pass on to you."

"If this is another stab at my disastrous sex-life, I don't want to hear it!"

"You want to hear this. Trust me. I have managed to track down Jankowski for you."

There was silence for a moment. Then, Edward said, "Jared Jankowski, the flutist?"

"Yeah, Alice gave me a rundown of what information you give the police and I recognized the name. He's the only one of the studio musicians you named that originates from the Seattle area. It also helps that he has a brother that's about my age that I know from football camps and what not. Anyway, I spoke briefly to this Jared fellow last night to see if he remembered hearing anything about a swanky birthday bash around Mars 2007… That was the date, right?"

"Right. So what did he say?"

"He couldn't recall any parties or nightclub outings that involved an open bar."

"That's what I've said all along. It doesn't fit."

"Hush, I'm not done yet… He knew nothing about a birthday party, but he did have one interesting tidbit to share. Apparently there was this one time, this one morning when you failed to show up on time for your recording session. When you finally got there, more that three hours late, you looked like something not even the cat would have dragged in. When asked about it, you cited food poisoning as the rea-… "

"No, not food poisoning," Edward cut in before his brother could finish his sentence. "I probably told them I'd had an allergic shock reaction, which by the way is true, Carlisle can vouch for that."

"You're talking about that time Peter had to rush you to the ER because your face swelled up to the size of a soccer ball? I bet you didn't know I knew about thet?"

"What? That was Peter?" he questioned sharply. "Are you sure? I could have sworn it was Jasper. I mean I know Jasper wasn't even in this part of the country at the time, but still…"

"Nope, you got the wrong Whitlock. It was cousin Pete. Esme told Rosie all about it, to make her feel better when she was preggers and her feet swelled up so bad that she had to cut her socks off. "

"That's crazy! The feet thing I mean, well actually the Pete thing as well. I haven't spoken to him in years. He's been on the road doing his DJ thing for as long as I can remember. But then again my memory is all whacked up. For some strange reason it's Jaspers ugly mug that keeps popping into my mind whenever I think of that trip to the ER."

"Maybe your mind is trying to subconsciously tell you something. Maybe your memory is all whacked up, because you don't want to remember. Maybe it's like a defense mechanism or something… It gives you something to ponder about, ey?"

Edward ignored the urge to bang his head against the nearest wall, but just barely. It wasn't the first time Emmett had turned all Dr. Phil on him. It was annoying as hell, especially since he couldn't dismiss it as complete rubbish.

"Can you get Peter's number from Jasper?" He sighed, rubbing his templates.

"Sure thing bro! Last I heard he was heading for Ibiza, though… or was it Mallorca? So it might be difficult to get a hold of him."

"I'm used to difficult. Difficult and I are long time buddies."

The day just barely begun, and Edward already had quite the headache… not to mention stiff muscles and a sore back.