Dear James Potter,

Day two of the weeklong detention.

I actually don't have anything to say to you today. My plan of not getting upset with you seems to be working. Although I guess it's been less than two days since the big fight, and we haven't exactly spoken to each other since then.

...

I don't know what to do. McGonagall's glaring over here, but I don't have anything to write about. I guess, after all of these letters, I've finally let out my anger. It's good in a way, it means I'm over -Potter- James. No hatred, no weird sort of almost kind of a crush, just neutrality. It feels amazing, I was in such a good mood about it today, and it didn't hurt that the dreamiest dreamboat to ever dream, our very own Rich Davies, asked me out again.

...

Well, she's glaring again, so I've got to keep writing. uh Flitwick Dumbledore Charms Charms Club Emma Vance Alice Bones Marauders Peter Pettigrew obnoxious follower Remus Lupin reasonable but also very following stop it Sirius Black obnoxious and everyone likes him for no reason James Potter

Actually not sure what to make of him today. Especially after we talked last night.

I wish I could read what he's writing right now, I don't know if he's letting out his feelings too, McGonagall has never said. I just wish that

Nothing. I just wish, if he was writing any letters, that I could read them. He's very confusing sometimes.

I wonder if he wishes he could read my letters?

Probably not, he has Kendra now. They've been walking down the hallway holding hands. Holding hands! He's never done that for a girl before. And I think I may have even seen him carrying one of her books. James Potter, treating girls well, acting like he likes them!

I mean, not that I care.

It's just, during the entire run of 197 askings, he never treated another girl like Kendra. All his previous girlfriends were one date, lots of PDA, and then a fast breakup. But not Kendra.

Well, he could be faking it, I guess, he's done worse to girls before. And they haven't had their first date yet, things will probably go back to normal after that. Not, like, normal as in the James and I situation, if there ever was a normal- the last thing I need is more of that, anyways. But normal Potter stuff, like bragging, and asking a different girl out every week, and dumb immature pranks, none of which he's done so far this year. But it's an act, he's obviously not turned into a good person, or our argument would never have happened.

Not that I care. I'm pitying Kendra. And wondering when my archenemy will return.

Not that he's my archenemy, or my anything. I don't care much.

Because if he's really grown up, and I've misjudged him this whole year No, let's not go there.

What else can I write about? The clock is moving so slowly. Detention never seemed this long before when I was ranting. Time flies when I'm angry.

I guess I write about our conversation last night. I stayed out of the Head's dorm as long as I could, and when I walked in, you were there, waiting for me. It was kind of... I don't know, kind of nice of you I guess.

Although at the time I just thought you were trying to continue the fight. I didn't say anything, just crossed the room while glaring at you.

"Wait." you said.

I turned around, folding my arms and raising an eyebrow. I was not going to be the one to apologize here.

To my surprise, you were. "I- I'm sorry." you said. "For the things I said. I didn't mean them, I was just angry."

I could feel myself smirking. "Really? You didn't mean it? And that's supposed to make anything better? You called me a bitch in front of the whole school-"

"I didn't mean it." You ran your hands through your hair like you always do when you're nervous. "I, well, I overreacted. I was finally going to ask out another girl, I thought that you'd be happy about it, and then..."

"I- I was happy." I said quickly. "It was just such a shock, and then we started fighting, and I just- lost control. I...I'm sorry. You should date Kendra if you want to."

"Really?" you said, eyebrows creeping together.

"Yeah." I said. I don't know why I kept lying, except the whole reason for my anger was more about his idiocy than -my feelings- anything else, or maybe because the way he was actually apologizing for something was making me feel incredibly guilty. "And I'm sorry for, um, rejecting you." Your eyes widened. "Not that I- you know, but I didn't realize it bothered you that much. You were right, I could've been nicer."

"No, no, I should've stopped." you said. "Besides, I thought it was funny the way you reacted. One of the reasons why I kept doing it. So, sorry for that."

"Right, you were never serious about them. That's what I thought." I said, trying to smile. You opened your mouth but I cut you off, not wanting to hear any more confirmation of what I already knew. "You should seriously ask out a girl who likes you then, it's good that you're doing that."

"So you have no problem with it?" you said. I could almost imagine that you sounded disappointed. "Because I-"

"No, of course not, what would I be, jealous?" The words tasted like flobberworms as I said them. "I think I've made my position on dating you pretty clear."

"Right, yeah." You looked down at your hands.

"Yeah." I said. "Us dating? Wow." I laughed, and you began laughing, too. Oh, world, look at us, Lily and James having a wonderful time!

The laughing stopped and a horrible silence replaced it. You were still staring at your hands.

"Well, um, good night." I said.

You mumbled a response.

The whole thing was just...unsettling. And a bit sad. You spent most of our exchange staring at your hands rather than at me, like you used to. And you apologized. Why did you apologize? I started the fight, and anyways you've only ever apologized to me three times, counting the time you called me a bint last year.

I think maybe you are growing up, and leaving behind your love of tormenting me.

I'm glad. Honestly. I don't need that kind of anger in my life. That's why I apologized to you.

And there's nothing I can do about any of it anymore anyways.

Not that I want to.

I just want, well, I don't know to be honest. I don't know.

Yours,

Lily Evans