thanks to princessneicy, velociraptor4659, xKimberly12x, Crazy WiAtch, you guys are great and i'm glad you liked it, and to the rest of you i hope you guys liked it too, here's a new chapter that i'm sure won't disappoint, hope you had fun watching Survivor Series 2013 and now, I can't wait for TLC :) :) :) have fun babies and don't forget to fav/review/follow xoxoxox
Phil Brooks exhaled deeply, he continued to chug away on the treadmill machine, his chest rising and tattooed arms pumping by his side. He had been running for a good 40 minutes, his shirt clung to his tight chest as it was drenched in sweat as well as every other part of his body. He was currently alone at the gym, he preferred it that way, soon he would move to weights even though he didn't have a spotter. It was always easier even when people saw him wearing his Beats headphones, fans would still manage to weasel their way towards him and have the decency to ask him for an autograph. All the same he continued through his routine, his mind still not in focus.
It had been a couple of days since he had given into temptation and cheated on April, he had finally done it. Done what he had been meaning to do for so long. He had become infatuated with Phoebe from the moment he met her, he knew he couldn't spend a minute without her or leave her alone. He finally made love to her, since Amy things had been bleak and he hadn't been interested in any other woman, in fact he was sure he hated women all together. The humiliation and the embarrassment had ruined his personal life as well as his life as a public figure head, interviewers bugging him about the cheating and love affair that went on behind his back. It was still on going, and even he too saw how easy it was to get drawn in by temptation and lust.
He was sure that Phoebe wasn't interested in him, why would she be after everything? But no, she had given into her feelings too – both of them fell into each other's arms and collapsed in a lust filled sweaty mess, the sex had been incredible, after not having sex in such a long time he was almost convinced his virginity had come back. He couldn't get enough of her and the insomniac within him made him want to watch her sleep, the beauty and perfection she possessed, she was too good for him, too nice. He still knew he wasn't worthy to have her and watching her only made him realise how lucky he was. He traced the stunning features on her face, the length of her nose, the line of her jaw, the curve of her breast, the flatness of her stomach with the tip of his finger.
He admired her body, just how sexy she was - he was a pervert he couldn't help himself, when he knew she was cold he pulled the covers over her body. Smoothing the hair out of her face he pressed his lips against her cheek then pulled her close, he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. That was when he fell asleep in an exhausted slumber, it wasn't just about physical, passionate attraction, Punk knew this was for real and he hadn't had feelings like this since Amy Dumas.
The next morning was strangely not what he expected, he woke up feeling guilt ridden and when she woke up too, the fear in her eyes when she first glanced at him proved that he wasn't the only one who felt ashamed. But there was electricity that still till this minute gave him goosebumps when he thought about it. He remembered how awful she felt about Nick and the storyline situation, and now she finally slept with him which scared her even more. He just wanted to tell her that everything was going to be okay, because it was, he just knew that there was still hesitation, and there was that fear - fear that she regretted everything that happened, fear that she still saw him for that asshole 6 months ago. Fear that she'd still choose Nick over him.
Eventually he hopped off the machine, he felt the dull ache in his muscles and was satisfied that he had gotten a decent work out in, next stop was weights. For someone to not spot him was a risk, especially when his mind was preoccupied on other things however he went ahead bench pressing at 250, grunting as he tried to focus on the task at hand. Punk knew that working out was a necessity - cardio, weight lifting, it came with the territory but however much he worked out, sweated and dieted, he still knew it really wasn't worth it. He had been labelled skinny fat from the moment he got into this business, a little weight on him did no harm.
Running was his only escape, it had calmed him and soothed his anxiety, it cleared his brain for the short period of time he was alone in peace. But his mind was still preoccupied on Phoebe, that's when he knew he was struggling.
"Take it easy dude, you should leave the real weights for me, fucking light weight," Punk blinked up when he saw a figure helping him with the weights, safety spotting him when he readjusted himself. "You might need to start working out with Alicia Fox, I'm not sure she even lifts weights."
Punk got an upside down image of April staring down at him, smirking she leant down pressing a soft kiss, it caught him off guard and all he wanted to do was curl up in a ball.
"Thanks for spotting me," Punk mumbled as he continued with his weights.
"It's cool, happy to do it for you. How are you? It feels like I've not seen you in ages, damn have you been growing your beard? You know how much I like you clean shaven." Yeah but Phoebe loves playing with my beard.
"I'm good thanks April, I know it's been a while – "
"I was wondering if you wanted to catch a film tonight? I knew you'd be in here, which is the reason why I found you."
"Actually April, there's something I need to tell you - "
"I was thinking we could catch a movie, then you can come back to my room, I have a surprise for you," April purred softly, her hands trailed to the bottom of his vest, slowly raising it to reveal his sweat filled torso, "straight edge" adorned in ink. April bit her lip in frustration, Punk had not been putting out and she wanted him, even if it meant right there on the bench press, or tonight in her hotel room. The second time she lent down, her tongue across his lips, reaching his lip ring she took it in her mouth, sucking it in.
"April stop, just hold on for a minute," Punk managed to mumble between kisses. "Godamnit April I need to talk to you."
April backed away in shock, eyebrow raised. Punk ran a shaky hand over his face, was he really about to tell her what had happened between him and Phoebe, he had just remembered that Phoebe was good friends with April, some friend. Some boyfriend. Punk knew he was a terrible person, he never realised how terrible he truly was. He couldn't believe he cheated, something that went against his morals, something that had broken him and here he was, contemplating asking for April's forgiveness when he knew he would never be able to forgive himself.
"What's wrong Phil, is everything okay?"
He sighed, staring down at the floor, he couldn't look her in the eye right now, anywhere but at her. "Phil you're really starting to scare me."
"Nothing is the matter, I'm fine."
"I know when something is the matter, I can see it in your eyes, your body language. Do you not want to have sex with me, make love to me? Is that what's bothering you? Am I not sexy enough for you?"
"April stop it, you're jumping to conclusions, I happen to find you incredibly sexy, you're gorgeous, it's not that – "
"We can do it another night, when you're ready, I'll wait."
"No, right, no let's just sit down for a minute, I can't think," Punk began rubbing his temples, he couldn't believe he was actually going through with this, he was going to break her heart. He took a shaky, deep breath, still contemplating whether it was best to lie. When he couldn't find the right words April took them right out of his mouth.
"You're breaking up with me," she stated, knowing she was right, she was always so bluntly right. "I'm right, aren't I."
Punk just stared, he saw the fear in her eyes turn into anger and frustration, there was no words for him to say, there was nothing that could make this better, nothing that would make her feel better at the point.
"Is this because you have feelings for Phoebe?" Her voice cracked, her eyes filled with tears.
"Look April, baby – "
"Don't baby me – that shit is not going to work. When? When did you give into temptation? When did you decide to fuck her?" She snarled.
"April stop, please I'm sorry – "
"Oh you're sorry! You're sorry, okay well that makes everything okay so, thanks a lot you son of a bitch."
"April, you're a great girl and I still respect you and admire you as a friend, I want to apologise and I know that this doesn't make anything okay, I truly am sorry, I never wanted to hurt you. I'd never want to hurt my favourite, spunky ass diva. April you have every right to be angry, none of this is okay, I just had to let you know the truth – "
"The truth?"
"Yes , the truth."
"Have you fucked her?"
Punk opened his mouth, he attempted to form a sentence and when no words came out April got her message, she got up from the bench took a couple of angry steps away from him until turning back and slapping him right in the face. It's not a real break up if you're not getting slapped in the face, his brother always used to say.
"Nothing you say is ever going to make this okay, you cheated on me and you're leaving me for someone else, and you're not even sorry. I knew you liked her even before you got with me and you still emotionally invested yourself and asked me out and you still had feelings for her at the same time. She was the one you liked, she was the one you were crushing on! Why did you even start a relationship with me Phil, what were you thinking? You knew how it was going to end from the moment you started it. You fucking cheated on me Phil, and I will never, never forgive you. Fuck you, asshole.
"I gave you everything. I cared for you when you got your surgeries, I cared for you when you were sick, sick of the company, when you needed time out, I dropped my friends to spend time with you. I ignored what I knew all along. What is it about her Phil that's so amazing? Is she prettier than me? Is she good in bed? Is she a slut?"
"April that's enough – "
"God I'm so stupid, I knew all along, the relationship was always one sided, fuck you Punk. I hate you, I hate you." Her make up run across her face, the tears where real and the more they fell the more Punk couldn't cope. What had he done? Why had he done it? She sank to the floor and hugged her knees as she attempted to control her shaky breath.
"Did you want me to feel what you felt when Amy broke your heart, was that it? Did you have some crazy vendetta against women and decide to hurt me?"
Punk sank to the floor, thankful that no one else was a round, he wrapped his own tattooed arms around her, the stench of stale sweat lingered in the air but neither of them cared, April flinched at the contact however eventually she let it go. He pressed his lips to her temple, attempting to soothe her down.
"Why Phil? Why did you do this? I feel like such a stupid idiot. I knew. I knew. You two were meant for each other, of course you were, when you look at each other sparks fly and when you see me, you just see this dumb, geek freak who worships the ground you walk on. I gave you everything and I still wanted to give you more. But she's perfect, I can't compete with that, I can't believe I thought I ever could. I wanted you to look at me the way you looked at her, god I wanted it so much. Why is this happening?"
Punk took hold of her chin, he tilted it so he could look into her eyes – he skimmed his finger under her eyes clearing her face from the mascara that ran down her beautiful face.
"I hate you Phil," she sniffled, somewhere inside him he found it adorable, but he knew she meant it. "I hate your guts, I hate your stupid face, your stupid lip ring, your stupid beard, your stupid tattoos.
"I know," he breathed, his eyes bore into her red bloodshot ones, he crushed her, she knew that he had feelings for Phoebe before he knew he had feelings for her himself. He wished he never had to do it, he wished it was easier, he wished he did it before anything happened between him and Phoebe.
"I know you're not going to forgive me anytime soon, I get it. I know you're going to be angry and upset and I really don't blame you."
"You got that right, I don't think I'll be okay for a long time," what hurt Punk more was knowing exactly how she felt, everything she felt was relatable and he couldn't quite comprehend why he had done such a disgusting thing.
"You never really liked me, did you? You never really loved me, you were never going to?"
"April…"
"You knew you were going to break up with me as soon as you got with me didn't you? You knew at some point you had to break my heart, didn't you?"
"I don't know."
April got up from the floor and strode towards the exit, she needed an escape, she needed somewhere to hide, she needed to get away from him. Punk couldn't stop her and he didn't have the heart to, if there was anything that would hurt more it was her seeing him every day. He stared at the spot she had just crawled down onto, his brain hurt and his heart clenched.
"Was I just a distraction Phil? A distraction from your feelings towards Phoebe because she was with Nick?"
Punk stared at her wide eyed, he wanted so badly to say no but couldn't bring himself up to do it, the only time lying would've been useful and he just couldn't do it, he couldn't hurt her any more than he already had done. Fresh tears sprung from her eyes as she let out another depressing sob, he turned away and was left with the echo of the door slamming. He was alone again. Alone with his thoughts. He destroyed a relationship and a person, never did he think he was capable of such a thing.
"I didn't mean to hurt you." He whispered softly.
Phoebe was finally done with all the scriptures and had even managed to write the final drafts for Over The Limit pay-per-view, the last couple of days had been exactly what she needed. A distraction from reality, there was so much work that needed to be done and she had finally finished everything that Steph needed her to do. Working back with the creative team wasn't ideal however ever since the restaurant incident Phoebe noticed a mellow like attitude and a lack of communication including insults and horrid name calling had been dialled down to zero, in fact they hadn't talked to her at all.
The work had sometimes gone on through into the night and Phoebe could feel herself going insane from the amount of scriptures and plans that needed doing to make sure everything was perfect, Stephanie noticed that Phoebe was a little odd than usual and her erratic behaviour was certainly not normal. She contemplated hiring an assistant when she knew she had to tell Phoebe to stop working.
Phoebe might have finished all of her work in the office, but now her brain was working into overdrive, the guilt had overridden her and she couldn't quite sit still or sleep or even eat. She hadn't seen, called or texted Phil and Nick, she had noticed the amount of voicemails and texts and missed calls both of them had left but she simply didn't have the time then, now she didn't know what to do with herself. She knew it was going to happen, she knew she was going to sleep with Punk at some point and it happened. Mental and physical exhaustion had taken over her body and sleep was the only thing she had that would help her escape. She couldn't deal with Nick, she couldn't deal with Phil and she couldn't deal with her life. When did it get so complicated?
A wave of sadness washed over her when she saw her phone light up, she had received a new text message – hesitant to see what it said she unlocked her phone and checked anyway.
I can't wait to see you tomorrow, beautiful. I've missed your lips, your smile, your laugh, everything – Nick
Phoebe groaned, when she was with Nick she always assumed that Nick was the one for her and not Punk, Phil. She was so conflicted but she knew she owed Nick the truth, even if she didn't know what she wanted.