Thanks so much for your reviews ScipioPB and HersheyC101! And thank you very much for the suggestion, Scipio! That's a great idea. I very well may use it in the near future! :D

As promised, here's another chapter out as fast as I could! These few chapters here have taken a backseat with the humor to get some plot points out there, but the silliness will be back soon enough. The next should be out a little quicker, too, my apologies~

Silver's the Freak Gene

Something was entirely too wrong with the picture.

Vaughn had paused at the soda machine to blackmail a coke out of Terry as per his daily ritual, but he found the machine to appear in perfect working order. Did Terry actually fix it? Or was it still gutted but gave off the appearance of a perfectly normal soda machine? But why?

Frowning at this discovery, Vaughn went to the elevator. He punched the squeaky clean up arrow and tapped the tip of his shoe against the tile. He finished off the last of his coffee and tossed the cup into the empty garbage bin. Vaughn shook his head, rattling his buzzing brain. Terry was right. He really shouldn't drink on Sundays…

Speaking of Terry…

"You're mopping?!"

The old janitor raised his head, pushing his brown cap up his brow. "Don't sound so surprised, asshole."

Vaughn blinked as Terry furiously scrubbed circles next to the elevator. He blinked again. "But why?"

Terry didn't bother looking up again, instead focusing his beady eyes on his work. "Witch is comin.'"

"What?" Vaughn grumbled, irritated by his ambiguity. The elevator lurched to the first floor, giving off an unpleasant ding! The doors roared open. "Who?"

"Can't talk; gotta not get fired. She likes firing people," Terry muttered, dunking his mop back into the yellow bucket. He quickly wheeled his way down the hall towards the first floor bathrooms. He called back over his shoulder: "You better duck and cover, kid!"

Vaughn shook his head, still disappointed he didn't get a soda. As the doors rumbled shut and the elevator began to rise to floor three, Vaughn loosened his tie. So God-damned hot in here… Dammit, don't drink on Sundays!

The doors opened, and the first thing Vaughn noticed was the vacuumed carpeting. It wasn't littered with staples and gum wrappers for a change. Vaughn shrugged and stepped out into the familiar office. Luke and Tina were playing paper football in their office, Allen was taking his red marker to scribble some profanities about Gill on the bathroom stalls, Dan was sleeping, and Molly was watering the ficas with an old Monster. Everything seemed normal.

"H-hi, Vaughn…"

Vaughn slowly turned in case his incredibly bad luck with this girl would escalate to accidentally smacking her with his briefcase. Luckily, there was no briefcase violence. He sadly looked down at the bandage wrapped tightly around Candace's head. "Hey, Candace…"

He didn't seem to notice her blush as she wrung her hands, her baby blue eyes avoiding him. "I-I'm sorry about Saturday… I w-wanted to apologize…"

"For what?" Vaughn's blatant question surprised her. "I hit you in the face."

"W-well, it was just an accident, and I never got to say anything about it, and I feel really badly for how everyone's been treating you…" she mumbled, biting her lip at the end.

Vaughn was about to reply that it wasn't so bad when Allen appeared behind him, smacking him on the shoulder. Snapping the cap of his marker closed on Vaughn's arm. "Hey, Candace, careful around this guy. That briefcase is at least four times the size of that Frisbee he nailed you with."

"Thanks for that," Vaughn muttered.

"Just keeping you out of prison, big shot," Allen winked, giving Candace's nose a light tweak as he passed.

Candace held her nose, quickly turning the shade of a tomato. "Erm, I-I had better get back to work! B-bye, Vaughn!"

Before he could even think of a reply, Candace had dashed back into the room she shared with Louis. First no soda and now humiliated by Allen in front of Candace. Vaughn moodily trudged to his desk and flopped into his swivel chair, spinning slightly. He dropped the briefcase and fired up his computer, watching the little logo load circles around and around.

"Heads up!"

A ball of paper hit Vaughn in the back of the head, followed by snickering from the cubicle wall behind him. Vaughn twitched in irritation, but he wouldn't give Allen the satisfaction of getting angry.

"Hey. Hey, Vaughn."

Vaughn typed in his password, watching the logo spin around again as it loaded his desktop.

"Hey, Vaughn. Guess what."

He double clicked his excel icon and started browsing through the list of documents for his most recent group of contacts. Where was that Forget-Me-Not order form…?

"Vaughn."

It's around here somewhere… Aha! Vaughn pulled up the document and sifted through the garbage for the main selling points. He'd have to tell Luke and Tina to start researching.

Bop! Another paper ball tapped the top of Vaughn's head before bouncing down onto his keyboard. His hangover headache pounded at the annoyance. Vaughn swiveled around in his chair, on arm casually resting across the back. He was looking as emotionless as possible; his eye lids only half open.

Allen and Rod were peering over the top of his cubicle, looking like mischievous little boys about to tell a terrible knock-knock joke. Rod was holding in his laughter despite his better judgment – the little voice in his head that told him not to screw around with Vaughn because it's like poking a grizzly bear.

"I bet," Allen began, snorting between his words, "that would've hurt… if it was a Frisbee."

"No kidding," a sharp voice snapped to their right. The three whirled to see a woman with long silver pin-straight hair chopped in four precise layers around her face, the shortest being her bangs. She was wearing all black from her suit jacket to her pencil skirt to her heels. Even so, there was no lack of color. Her striking orange eyes made up for it tenfold, glaring daggers at Allen in particular. "Are you stupid? Because your jokes are. Now get back to work before I have your head."

All three men looked at each other in disbelief. Who on Earth was this woman? And what authority did she hold over them? 'Have your head?!'

"Vivi~!" Hamilton's office door slammed open, hitting the wall with such a force that Gill was knocked out of his chair in the backdraft. Hamilton skipped out of his office and took the irate woman by both hands, twirling her around and around in his excitement.

The woman quickly released herself, brushing off her hands. She sniffed in a way to rival Gill in snobbishness. "Don't call me that."

Hamilton wasn't deterred by her attitude. He was all aglow like he was seeing an old friend or relative – not his boss. "Of course, Superintendent! How could I be so informal?"

"Superintendent?!" Rod squeaked, hurrying back into his chair and straightening his tie. Allen feigned carelessness, but he couldn't hide the few awkward glances her way as he organized some papers on his desk. Vaughn took off his tie completely, already sick of the day's events - and it wasn't even noon.

Superintendent Vivi smoothed out her hair from the ambush she received. She hiked her purse to the crook of her elbow, tossing a lock of silver over her shoulder. "I'm here to check up on a few things. See how business is. I can trust your e-mails about as far as I can throw you, and you're quite fat."

Hamilton punched her shoulder playfully. "Oh, you~! I'm so glad we're such great pals! We can throw names around… Ya slugger!"

"Don't call me that," Vivi repeated briskly. She suddenly turned and looked down at Vaughn, her bright eyes scrutinizing him for a few seconds. Vaughn ignored her and went back to his work. She finally released her gaze and turned back to Hamilton who was blabbering about liking all of her posts on Facebook. "Your office is this one?"

"Yes!" Hamilton sidestepped for her to pass. "I have a mini-fridge!"

"Excellent. I want to see hard copies of this year's performance reviews. And get me some juice," she ordered as Hamilton closed the door behind them.

"Well, she's a nightmare…"

Vaughn didn't hide the exhaustion in his voice, not even bothering to look her way. "What now, Alice?"

Alice pursed her lips, acting much like her usual self. She picked a stray string from her tight red skirt. "Just thinking."

Vaughn didn't want to ask about what.

She hummed lightly to herself. "Notice anything new?"

"No."

"You have to look!"

The harshness in her voice made Vaughn decide to just get it over with. He looked up from his computer to see Alice perched on his desk, smiling brightly. She primped her hair a few times. His eyebrows rose. "Pigtails?"

"Don't you like them?" Alice gushed, pulling the bands securing them to the top of her head tighter. "I'll have to do this more often – I think they're so cute! Don't you think they're cute, Vaughn~?"

Vaughn shrugged, going back to his computer once again. "Sure."

"Say it."

"Cute."

Alice put her hands on her hips, glaring down at him. "Sound like you mean it!"

He thought a moment to himself. "Why do you need my approval?"

"I do not!" Alice refused, shaking her head. Her pigtails ridiculously followed her movement. She grumpily crossed her arms.

"You're intimidated by me," Vaughn suddenly accused.

Alice faltered. She scoffed. "What? Don't be ridiculous."

"Helping me out with the report? I know what you're capable of, and it's called being nice. Try to disguise it with all the usual dumb show all you want, but it's too late now. I know you're a real human being, and you're just wasting your time trying to convince me otherwise," Vaughn shrugged and clicked his mouse.

Alice glared hard at him. Her eyes scanned him in a similar way Vivi's had, though her gaze was more genuine. The depth quickly disintegrated once again and the ditzy smile returned. She twirled one of her pigtails playfully. "Well, don't you like them? Say you like them~"

Vaughn's phone went off. "Thank God… I mean… I have to take this."

Alice huffed and hopped off his desk, making her way back to her own. Vaughn picked up his headset and lazily leaned against it instead of putting it on. He pressed the correct button. "You've reached Persuasive—"

"Vaughn," Molly's voice crackled through the receiver. Vaughn looked over at her desk where she had her phone pressed up against her ear. "Come over here!"

This wasn't too uncommon. It was a good way of communicating, especially if they were pranking Gill and they didn't want to appear too suspicious. Vaughn dropped his headset and ended the call, stretching as he rose and took his time walking over to Molly's desk.

"So," she commented, hanging up her phone and closing out of a box that looked like solitaire on her computer.

"Thanks for saving me from Alice," Vaughn said, propping his elbows up onto the tall counter.

"No biggie," Molly smiled. Her apprehensive expression spoke differently. She twirled a pencil between her fingers as she leaned forward to whisper. "You know… I've seen you with Alice quite a bit lately…"

"She did me a favor. Helped me out after work," Vaughn explained. He couldn't say he disliked Alice as much as he used to, now that he knew her game, but he was still incredibly annoyed with her. She was extremely immature – perhaps equivalent with Luke only in a different way. And Vaughn didn't like not being able to be serious with a person. Or feel like he was being played for a fool.

"What? After work? You mean here?" Molly harshly whispered.

"Yeah—"

"Sh!" Molly rose from her chair slightly, frantically motioning for Vaughn to stop talking. "Don't say it too loud! Do you know what she does after work? Almost every night? With Allen? On Gill's desk?"

Vaughn stepped back in surprise. He looked over at Gill's seemingly innocent desk, the man sitting there busily sharpening his pencils to the exact same length with an electric sharpener. It shrilly buzzed, drowning out most of the conversations going on in the room, including their own. "No kidding?"

"Everyone knows!" Molly chided. "So don't go around spreading that – they'll think you guys were doing something else… were you?"

"No!" Vaughn snapped, angry she'd ask. He pulled at his shirt collar uncomfortably. "I was working on a brochure… for a friend. I was doing it alone so no one else would get their hands on it, and Alice forced her help on me. She was really good about it."

"Huh," Molly seemed genuinely surprised. She smiled knowingly. "Well. That is really nice of her, isn't it?"

"What are you smiling about?" Vaughn grumbled.

"Oh, nothing!" Molly sang, smiling even wider as she went back to her game of solitaire.

"What?!" He demanded. Since she didn't answer, he let out a 'humph.' "Fine. Whatever."

"Exactly how long have you been working here?"

Heads turned across the room to see Vivi once again and a nervous-looking Terry in front of her. Hamilton wasn't anywhere in sight, and the old man was shaking like a leaf. "About thirty years, ma'am."

Vivi looked at his uniform with distaste. "Looks about right… but I'm not too impressed."

Molly's eyes widened scared as she quickly looked at Vaughn. He took it as his cue to do something.

"I got the whole place swept clean for your arrival," Terry was pitching himself. "And… And, uh, no one knows the building better than I do, ma'am. She's like my home."

"You look like you could live here," Vivi gave him that. She shook her head. "Hm. Not impressed."

Vaughn crossed the room and made his way between Vivi and Terry. He was wearing his sternest face which would put most people on edge or cringing in fear. Vivi seemed unphased. "Hey. Leave him alone."

"What are you, his lackey?" She looked Vaughn up and down again. She was very tall, nearly reaching him in height. Vivi shifted her weight in a challenge.

"He's just an old man doing his job," Vaughn defended.

"As Superintendent, I could have you fired for insubordination," Vivi stated plainly and crossed her arms.

Vaughn stayed put.

The awkward tension in the office was ripped apart once Hamilton reappeared from his room, once again blowing Gill out of his chair. He was flailing his arms in a panic to please. "Superintendent! Can I get you some more blackberry juice? A back massager? Some feminine hygiene products?"

Vivi turned on her heel, her back to Vaughn and Terry. "I'm fine, thank you. Just getting to know the staff…"

"Great!" Hamilton congratulated, clapping his chubby hands enthusiastically. He linked elbows with her, leading her back around the office. "Why don't we look over your Twitter feed again? Retweet some more white girl problems?"

Vivi agreed that sounded nice and the duo disappeared once again. Vaughn slowly turned around to face Terry, shaking his head. "Guess that's the witch you mentioned this morning. I get it now…"

"Vaughn," Terry started, but he was cut off.

"Don't bother thanking me," he said.

"I was just going to tell you about that piece of paper taped to your back. Says 'Frisbee,'" Terry squinted.

"What?!"

The lights went out one by one once again, leaving Vaughn in the dark with only the light from his desk lamp. It was his own fault this time. What with all of the goofing around and talking and sticking up for defenseless, ungrateful janitors, he had gotten barely any work done. So here Vaughn was after hours. Even Alice had gone home, leaving him to finish up. He hoped this wouldn't become a usual thing.

Vaughn spent the next half hour jotting down the essentials and going over prospective clients. By the time he was finishing up, he was dozing off with his chin in his palm. His drowsy eyes blinked slower and slower until they stayed closed.

"Is this a habit of yours?"

So surprised by the voice, Vaughn's heels kicked back, slamming his chair against the wall behind him. Seeing the intruder, he tiredly rubbed his eyes with his thumb and index finger. "I thought I was the last here."

"Well, you were wrong," Vivi stated the obvious, carefully placing her purse on his desk. She held her hands together, staring at the square ceiling panels. "You didn't answer my question."

"Didn't know I had to," Vaughn quipped, righting his chair and saving the changes he made on his computer. He didn't bother straightening out the papers on his desk, instead just shoving them in handfuls into his briefcase. As an afterthought, he added: "Your highness."

To his slight surprise, Vivi smirked. What surprised him more was when she moved with cat-like reflexes and took up his face in both of her hands. "Aren't you just the cutest little thing?!"

Vaughn didn't hide his shock, his cheeks twisting around to her will like one of those obsessive great aunts. "What the hell?!"

She released him and gave his head a pat, leaning against the desk between him and his keyboard. "Your name is Vaughn, correct?"

Vaughn rubbed his jaw to regain the feeling and some dignity. "What's it to you?"

She giggled – maniacally or merrily, he couldn't tell. "You know, you're just what I've been looking for," Vivi listed off his 'admirable' qualities on her fingers. "No respect for authority. Good work ethic despite your tardiness. And you don't really give a shit about anything, do you?"

"I wouldn't say that…" he argued, confused why a superior was talking to him so coarsely and grabbing at his face. And it wasn't true. Not completely anyways. Vaughn was good at giving off the appearance he didn't care, but he genuinely liked a good many things. He liked windy days, open air, dogs, porridge. And he had that thing with the girl in accounting, but he doubted that would ever come to light.

"And undeniably sexy," Superintendent Vivi ignored him, drumming her fingers on the desk. "I have a proposition for you."

"So do I – you move so I can log out and get the hell out of here," Vaughn indicated the computer behind her, wearing his typical grouchy expression.

Her face fell threateningly, her eyes narrowing. "Look, I'm about to offer you a job that pays quadruple with half the work. Shut your trap."

Vaughn did.

"I need an assistant. A secretary, if you will," Vivi prattled. "Carrying the weight of a company alone is rather stressful at times, after all. You'll get to do quite a bit of travelling. Busy work."

"So you want me to run and get your coffee," Vaughn stated flatly, not impressed. "Get an intern."

Vivi smirked, leaning forward suggestively. "Among other things… an intern isn't quite… old enough for."

Vaughn scoffed. "You're crazy."

She clicked her tongue. For some reason, she wasn't put off by his foul attitude. Why did she remind him of something? Or rather… someone. Someone who was just rubbing her pigtails in his face that very same morning. Were all silver-haired people crazy? Hamilton had silver hair, too, and no one was arguing in that department. Or was it just age? Was Hamilton that old? Vaughn always had silver hair. Did that mean Vaughn had already gone crazy? Did he just not know it yet?!

Vaughn shook his head. He had gotten way ahead of himself. Still, it was high time he got out of this loony bin. But Vivi was still waiting for an answer.

Vaughn picked up his briefcase and stood, finally taller than she was to make himself more intimidating. "Not interested."

Vivi sighed. "You're making a mistake."

Vaughn grumbled some nonsense and side-stepped her. He opened the door to the stairwell, feeling like the elevator wasn't fast enough. The door closed behind him on heavy hinges, leaving her alone in the light of his desk lamp.

Vivi sat down in his chair, swiveling back and forth with a bemused look on her face. She picked up what she thought was an empty box on his desk, tossing it between her hands. No one had ever looked her in the eye and turned her down flat like that. It certainly proved he was the type she was looking for. But perhaps he was a little too unruly. Wouldn't do any good if he outright refused to follow any orders. What kind of a hired slave would that be—?

"OW!" Vivi screeched, throwing the box down. The lid had popped off in her musings and revealed a mousetrap placed specifically for a snooping Gill. It caught the tip of her finger which was now in her mouth. What kind of a monster keeps that in his desk?!

She kicked his desk irritably and stomped her foot from the smarting pain. Snatching her purse, Vivi made her way to the elevator. It arrived with a ding! She boarded, still sucking her sore finger.

Terry and his mop inhabited the usual corner. He didn't make eye contact, but he curiously watched her sucking her thumb.

Vivi whirled on him, feeling his judging eyes. "What are you looking at?!"

Before he could even squeak in surprise, she gave him a 'wet willy' for being 'too inquisitive.' The doors slammed shut as Terry's cries for mercy echoed through the empty office.