It was days like this when he remembered. When the sun shined high and you could feel the coming summer in the wind. When the children were at school and the silence conquered the house. When the only sound he could hear was his own panting from the work out in the dojo. Yes, at days like this the day from 20 years ago played in his memories like it had happened only recently. He remembered her little arms around his neck. Her fragile smile saying the words he did not want to hear. Her laugh that was so improper for the situation. Every detail of her packed suitcase.
"Fine! If you want this way, then go! See if I care!" he stormed out of her room, banging her door shut behind him. Three steps away from her room he took his rage out on the wall, punching a big hole through it. From the corner of his eye he saw their families standing in front of the staircase, too scared to come to the second floor. He could see their worried faces, their tears ready to burst. It made him even madder – he was the one who wanted to cry! He pulled his hand out of the hole and turned again towards the door. Without knocking he walked into the room. She had finished packing all her documents she felt important to bring with her.
"I'm sorry, Akane. I didn't mean it like that – I don't.. want you to go. So can you stop packing?" He stood in the middle of the room like misplaced piece of furniture.
She laughed as she glanced at him: "I know you don't want me to go. But this is not your choice to make."
"Please, Akane, don't do this," he had said with a voice almost breaking, "just tell me what's wrong and I'll fix it."
"Nothing's wrong, Ranma. There's nothing for you to fix," she said while taking another dress out from the closet. He recognised the dress she had worn on their first date after the failed wedding. She looked at the dress with small smile playing on her lips and put the dress back at the closet to take out the dress Ranma had never seen her wear.
"If nothing's wrong, then why are you doing this?" Ranma asked, getting more desperate with each clothing item travelling to the suitcase.
"I told you – I just have to," she said without looking at him.
"That's not enough of a reason!" he said while grabbing her shoulders to make her look at him, "tell me!"
She looked him into the eyes – her eyes were pure, confident and peaceful while his were stormy, angry and sad at the same time.
"Ranma," she said and touched his cheek with her fingertips. He no longer cared about his pride. He wrapped his arms around her into a tight hug.
"'Kane, I… you do know, right? All the others – I don't care about them. I never have. You do know it, don't you?"
She slightly pushed him away just enough to put her arms around his neck.
Only a small whisper came out of her smile formed lips as she said: "I know you love me, Ranma." She could see tears forming in his eyes as he stayed quiet. "And I love you too."
He tore his gaze from her face as he said: "I find it hard to believe right now."
"I know you do," she said with a smile as she slid her hands down his torso and straightened his blouse.
"You know I've always wanted to do this – straighten your blouse while you're wearing it," she said as bigger smile grew on her face. She turned away from him yet he grabbed her hand and pulled her back into his arms.
But this time he held her head close to his: "Akane, I have never begged anything from you. But I beg you now, don't do it. Don't go."
His eyes travelled from her eyes to her lips and before he noticed he was leaning in.
"Don't," she said her gaze fixed on his lips.
"Why not?" he asked.
"It won't change my mind."
"Then does it matter?"
"It will hurt only more."
"You're already hurting me enough," he said and closed the gap between their lips. It was sweet and slow. How his lips fitted hers. She obeyed and responded the same. She could feel his feelings through this single kiss – how all he ever wanted to do was to keep her safe; how he wanted to hear all of her troubles; how he would be there until the end of times. He let his front head rest on hers keeping his eyes still closed. She slowly opened her eyes, had he opened his eyes he'd seen a tear forming in the corner of her eye.
"Saotome Ranma, you are perfect."
He opened his eyes, a slight hope in his eyes: "No, I am not. I am stupid gender bending perverted jerk."
She let out a small laugh: "You are, aren't you?"
She slowly pushed him away from herself; she looked at his eyes and studied his face as if she wanted to paint it later. Her fingers brushed his bangs as she smiled a weak smile and said: "I do love you and one day you will understand it. It might not be tomorrow, but one day you will understand."
"I don't want to understand. I want you. I want us. From now until forever," he said, his words being strong and confident. The day had been emotional enough to make him no longer feel embarrassment of how desperate he sounded.
"I know," she said as she turned back to her suitcase. He kept silent, no longer having words he hadn't used yet. She looked around the room, her eyes barely pausing on him.
"I guess it's all," she said with a small frown. She closed the suitcase and picked it up from her bed. Her eyes stop on him, trying to find words to say. Noticing he wasn't looking at her, she followed his gaze. He looked behind her on her nightstand where a picture frame stood. The same he had gotten her during one Christmas. It still contained the picture of their families and friends but on the frame itself were tons of little pictures of only the two of them. She was going to leave it behind, just like she left behind everything else that had any connection to him, just like she was going to leave him. A tear ran down his cheek and he did nothing to hide it.
"Good-bye, Ranma," she said quietly as she left the room. He stood motionless. He heard their families starting to cry, yelling at her, trying their best to keep her from going. He stood motionless as he heard the front door closing, leaving everybody weeping. The room filled with her fragrance, the memories, the hopes – it seemed so empty now. He was never the one to surrender – he still wanted to fight! To turn the events around and make her come back but he didn't find the energy to go after her. There was something in the air that said that this was final. That no matter how far he chased after her, she was not coming back. He dragged himself to her bed and took the picture frame. In the picture he was surrounded by his other fiancées and there were so many crazy people that they had to deal with. But they were happy. They were young and nothing could stop them. There were dreams and hopes.
He felt anger rise in him – it felt so unfair. Who had known that the crazy stormy days were the happiest ones? That the peaceful shiny days are the ones that hurt the most? He wanted to break the picture frame, tear the picture into million little pieces and burn it. Yet he couldn't do it, thinking that if she decided to come back, she'd hate him for that. And that realisation made him break. The world around him disappeared as he released his pain into the world with his desperate weeps.
He waited a year and another one. With each passing day he felt more out of place at the house he had wanted his children to call home. Once the dojo was written on Kasumi's and 's name, he left. He found an abandoned dojo he rebuilt as his own. Yet even in the new house, the memories of her haunted him and anybody else who noticed the similarities to the old Tendo house. No one said it out loud but it felt as if he had built a new home for her to return to. But she never did. Years went by and he found a woman and they had two beautiful sons.
Yet on days like this he went to the storage room, pulled out a small box and took out an old picture frame. He would open the frame and take out the picture to reread the words he had once found written there: "I will love you until death and beyond."
"Me too, tomboy, me too."
All rights for the characters and original story belong to Rumiko Takahashi.
Something that came into my mind because of a song called "Walk it off" by Angus and Julia Stone. Also the main point is a little bit influenced by the movie "Horns".
And yes, I do cry while writing.