Chapter 32

The three Curtis siblings laughed and fooled around together while they cleaned up from the mess left over from the cake, while Sara made sure that they saved a small piece for Ponyboy. After they had everything tidied up the three moved on into the living room where Sara spent the rest of the evening with her two oldest brothers. The group of three played some simple card games like war and go fish while they laughed and teased each other until Sara couldn't keep her eyes open a minute longer. She had curled up into Soda's lap and he was stroking her hair when the conversation had died down some between them. Darry had been nice enough to turn the television on for Soda while he grabbed only one section of the newspaper. Soda sat and watched a commercial while he continued to caress Sara's hair, but couldn't help notice that Darry was spending a lot of time looking over the help wanted ad. When he had thought that Sara was fast asleep he spoke to Darry about it. "Darry why are ya hunting through those wanted ads? Are you afraid something gonna happen with your job?"

Darry peaked up over the top of the paper to make sure that Sara wasn't still awake before he spoke. "Well for your information I'm thinking about picking up a part time job. With summer coming on I thought that it might be best to try to bring in some extra money for us."

"Oh, Darry you can't" Came Sara's little tired voice. Both boys looked down at Sara who was lying still and with her eyes close.

"Shhh, go back to sleep." Soda whispered down into her ear.

"Soda, why don't you bring her into bed and we can talk about his after." Darry suggested.

"Yeah sure, c'mon little munchkin." Soda had managed to wiggle out from being pinned by Sara, and scooped her up bridal style. He carried her back to her room and tucked her into her bed. Sara barely made a sound she was so tired. Soda leaned in and placed a soft kiss on her forehead and softly spoke. "Sleep tight Babygirl. There's nothing to be afraid of tonight." Sodapop almost reached to turn her radio on, and remembered Darry's consequence that he had set for her. He pulled his hand back and tugged one more time at her covers. As he was exiting he noticed that her window was still wide open from earlier today so he slid back over and closed it shut some. He softly crept back towards her door where he closed it half way. He headed back out to the living room before grabbing a Pepsi from the fridge. When he approached the living room, Darry looked up from the paper.

"She went down ok?" He asked.

"Yeah, I think that 9 mile hull to the cemetery might of just warn her right out. Something tells me that sleeping might not be an issue tonight." Darry didn't respond with much but a grunt. So Soda walked over to the television where he turned the volume up and switched the channel to something more entertaining before sitting himself back on the couch. He had been waiting for this time to come all night so that he could speak with Darry about his conversation with Sara. Soda cleared his throat trying to get his courage up to challenge Darry's punishment for Sara. "Don't you think that you're being a little harsh with her?" Sodapop directed towards Darry while the two sat in the living room waiting for Ponyboy to return from the movies.

Darry lowered the paper and spoke. "Sodapop she needed a consequence that was going to make an impression and taking her music away is definitely going to do just that. It's one of the things she loves and enjoys, the other being Mr. Bear and I just couldn't do that." Darry said bringing his attention back to the help wanted ads.

"Knowing Sara, she would of probably just of taken another lickin' over losing her music for a week." Soda took his eyes up off of the television and looked at Darry to see what the expression on his face might be when he mentioned another lickin'.

"I don't think so. You didn't see her tonight, Soda. She really thought that I was gonna give her another one, and it scared her more than you'll know. Her whole little body was so tensed and the fear that I could see in her eyes every time I went to touch her, it was awful." Darry tried to shake the sight out of his mind. "I hope I don't ever have to do it again, but something tells me different." Darry looked up to see that Sodapop was just raising his eyebrows as in question if he was serious or not. "Soda, she's just so bullheaded. She's just like Da.."

"Like you?" Soda smiled interrupting Darry before he could finish his sentence.

"No, I was gonna say just like Dad." Darry said putting the wanted adds down.

"Which then makes her just like you." Soda said with a smug expression on his face.

"Yeah, well, thinking about Dad what are we gonna do about this thing with her and school? I think she wants to go, but she's kind of on the fence about the whole thing. She wouldn't really give me a straight answer when I asked her about it. All she kept insisting was that she wants to go with Dad."

"Is that why she trucked all the way out to the cemetery? Was to ask Dad to go with her?" The smug expression on Soda's face had now faded to an expression of sorrow.

"We didn't really get into that, but something tells me it might have been one of the reasons. She told me that she was waiting for an answer from them. So she must of asked them something along that lines. She didn't want to leave because she hadn't heard the answer yet." Darry started tapping his fingers on the arm of the chair. "She thinks she needs a party dress to go to this thing."

"Of course she does, Darry. One of those dresses that will flare when she twirls and all those things that little girls dream of when they go to these type of things."

"These types of things are for Socs, Soda. Who the hell thinks up these things anyhow? And besides that I told her that she has plenty of dresses in her closet. We can't just go out and buy her a new dress for just this occasion. When would she ever wear it again? It would be a waste of money."

"I don't know, Dar. But you're taking her, right?" Soda asked looking back over at the television. Darry sat quietly before Soda asked again. "Well aren't ya? Cause you're the next best thing to Dad." Soda added, making Darry squirm some in his chair.

"Oh, I am, am I? Because little brother, I was thinking you're the dancer in the family, so you should be the one to take her." Darry tried to make light of the situation with teasing his brother some about his dancing moves.

Soda took his eyes off of television and back onto Darry. "Are you serious? You really think it should be me? Because I think it should be you, but if you don't want to, then I'll do the honors. I don't mind. It's the least I can do. I mean I'll never be able to fill Dad's shoes, but I'll try." Soda paused thinking about his father and how it really should be Darry but instead he said. "I'll do it. I mean if it makes her happy, I can friggin' go, what's it for like two hours or something?"

"Something like that." Darry responded. The two sat in silence for a little while before Soda got up off the couch to go place the empty popcorn bowl into the sink. He was feeling a bit irritated that Darry wasn't taking Sara, because Soda knew that Sara would want Darry to be one to do so. Darry got up from the chair and followed Soda into the kitchen. "So it's settled then? You'll take her to the Father-Daughter dance on Friday?"

Soda turned from washing out the popcorn bowl and nodded his head but it was the comment that he made after that pieced a hole through Darry's heart. "Yeah Dar, I'll take her, so that means you're off the hook. I'll tell her in the morning." Darry was taken back a bit by the tone that Soda had just used. Where was this coming from he wonder. Just a few minutes ago they were laughing and teasing each other and now this.

"What's with the attitude?" Darry snarled back towards Sodapop.

"Attitude? What about where's the gratitude, Dar? You should be thanking me for stepping up to the plate to take her to this damn thing. God forbid you go with her." Soda was trying to stay calm but Darry had struck a nerve and now he couldn't stop. "What the hell scares you so, Dar? It's just a damn dance for Christ Sakes. Two hours max? What you can't be seen out in public with your little sister for two hours? Afraid of what people might say? I mean Jesus Dar, it's not like people are gonna be gossiping that she's yours or anything. Almost everyone in this town knows about what happened to Mom and Dad."

"Soda, you know damn well that I would if I could, but I need to work. You know so I can keep a roof over this family's head, along with putting food on the table, clothes on your backs. That's why I can't take her." Soda slammed down the bowl in the sink and walked right up to Darry so that the two were now standing nose to nose.

"You know what Dar? I'm so sick of hearing that line from you! Every chance you get you throw it into our faces. I guess me working forty plus hours a week doesn't help put a roof over this families head, or food on the table, or all the extras, like getting Sara off the bus every day, watching her until you're off work and all that shit?" When Darry just looked at Soda like a deer in the headlights, Soda continued. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Well guess what I'm outta here, Dar. Don't wait up." Soda pushed one of the kitchen chairs out of the way and brushed passed Darry. He grabbed his shoes by the door and before Darry could stop him from leaving Soda was already headed out into the darkness of the night.

Darry sat in his chair staring at a fuzzy black and white off the air signal on the tv. He glanced down at his watch to notice that it read quarter pass one. Soda knew better than to be out this late. Darry knew it was a waste of his time to sit there and wait when who knows when he would decide to come home. It was he just had no idea where Sodapop had run off too, and that's what bothered Darry the most. Darry pulled his tired body up from the chair and slowly moved over to turn off the television. He even decided that he would turn the lamp off to help save of the electric bill. Just as he was going to hit the switch a shadow from the hallway caught his eyes. He stopped himself from turning it off and waited for the shadow to emerge from the hall. He heard the shuffling feet and knew right away who it was. "Ponyboy?"

A sleepy voice answered back to Darry. "Yeah, it's just me, Dar." Pony's figure soon appeared from the shadows.

"What are you doing up?" Darry asked roughly approaching the boy.

"I ummm, was uh, having a hard time, umm sleeping." Pony managed to mutter out.

"Did you have another nightmare?" Darry asked with concern getting a bit closer to Pony. When Darry grew closer he could see that Pony's face was flushed and that he had beads of sweat on his forehead. "You did, didn't you?" Pony's eyes darted to the ground with embarrassment but nodded his head. "Do you want to talk about it?" Darry moved towards the sink to fill a glass of water for his little brother but still keeping his eye on him just in case.

"No." Pony answered quickly. Darry carefully moved back over to Pony and handed him the glass, but when Pony graciously accepted it Darry noticed his hand was shaking some. "Thanks, Dar." Pony said before taking a long sip.

"Pony you're not looking so hot. Why don't you sit down for a minute?" Darry pulled out one of the chair at the table and motioned for Pony to sit. Pony didn't refuse and sat down quickly. "You sure you don't want to talk about it?" Darry tried asking him again.

"Nah." Pony took another long sip from the glass before finishing off what was left. He leaned back in his chair looking out into the empty living room, and Darry noticed him glancing at the door.

"He's not home yet." Darry said kicking at a dirty spot on the kitchen floor with his toe.

"He's late." Pony added getting up to place his glass in the sink.

"Yup." Was the only answer that Darry could provide back to Ponyboy.

"Do you think he's ok?" Darry could sense the concern in Ponyboy's voice, and knew he needed to provide him with something that would help him feel at ease.

"He's just blowing off some steam. He'll come home; it'll just be on his time, that's all."

"But he wasn't with any of the gang, Dar. We saw Steve and Evie at the drive-in, and Two-Bit was with Cathy. What if it got jumped or something?"

"Stop worrying, little buddy, no wonder you're having nightmares. You and your sister worry way to much for your ages, you know that?" Darry was trying to lighten the mood but when he noticed that he didn't he tried another tactic. "He'll be fine, trust me, he's Sodapop, right?" Darry moved over and placed a hand on Pony's shoulder trying to reassure him that everything was alright but when his hand landed down he could still feel Pony trembling some. "Pony?" Pony tried turning away from Darry so the two couldn't see each other. Darry gently took ahold of Pony's chin and turned it so he could see Pony's face. "Pony, talk to me Kid. What's got you so spooked?" Pony lightly licked his lips and then bit down on it with his front teeth. "C'mon, Pon. Just tell me, you'll feel better."

Pony was carefully picking his words before speaking. "It's Sara, Dar." Pony confessed.

"Huh?" Darry looked confused; he was expecting a lot of things, but not for Pony to mention it was something about Sara.

"My nightmare, it was about Sara." Pony took a deep breath before speaking again. "Darry, I'm real sorry about what happened this afternoon. I know how disappointed you must be in me. You trusted me to watch her and I let her take off." Darry couldn't believe how hard Ponyboy was taking this and not to mention how hard he was being on himself. Darry understood fully now why he was looking for Soda. Pony needed comforting. Pony probably wanted to confide all of this to Soda, but now he was stuck with him.

"Pony, I'm not disappointed in you at all. You would know if I was. What Sara did this afternoon was by no means your fault. She made that choice all by herself. I can guarantee that she would of pulled that same stunt on any of us. It just happened to be you that she pulled it on." Darry stopped to see if Pony was following and when he noticed the look of disbelief, Darry continued. "Pony you can't let this eat you up. She's home, safe and sound, and I'm pretty certain that she won't be doing anything stupid like that again." When Darry noticed that Pony's eyes were starting to get misty he tried to pull his little brother into a hug. "Oh, Pony." Darry said rubbing the back of his head.

"I was just so scared, Dar. Even though she can be the biggest pain in the as.. butt."

"I know Pon, I know." Darry gently pushed Ponyboy back so that he could look him straight in the eye. "It's not your fault."

"But I was in the shower, she was outta my sights."

"How many times have we've all taken a shower and have left her outta of our sights?" Pony went to say something but Darry jumped back in. "Exactly, Pony. Hundredths of times, you can't beat yourself up over it, and you shouldn't be having nightmares about it either." Darry embraced his baby brother one more time before adding. "Now, I have one baby brother to worry about I don't need another one, so promise me that you forgive yourself and head back off to bed."

Pony let a slight smile come to his face and agreed. "But what about Soda?"

"He'll come home soon, Pon. He's just trying to prove a point to me that's all."

"What point? What happened between you too?"

"We had a disagreement of sorts." Darry's glanced over towards the hall that headed towards their bedrooms sending a clue to Pony.

"About Sara?" Pony asked following his glance down the hall.

"Yeah." Darry paused and thought, hell why not take the leap. "Pony, did you know anything about this Father-Daughter dance happening at Sara's school?" Pony turned back towards Darry and slowly nodded his head.

"It's posted up around school and everything. It's something that they do every year Darry. Don't you remember it happening when you were in school?" Pony stopped to notice that Darry was just shaking his head no, that he didn't remember. "The girls really look forward to it. It's like one of the very few things that's put on from kindergarten through twelfth grade." Darry rubbed at his forehead trying to remember, but seeing he wasn't a girl he never paid much attention to that kind of stuff.

"No, I don't remember."

"So are you taking her?"

"No, Soda is."

"Were you supposed to take her?" Pony knew that there had to be more to the story for him and Soda to get into it over just a dance.

"No, well, I don't know. It's complicated." Darry tried to explain.

"Well, I don't know much about this stuff, Dar, but honestly it doesn't sound that complicated to me. You're either taking her or not." When Pony noticed the scowl on Darry's face he tried to reassure his big brother. "I wouldn't worry about it too much; she'll probably be just as happy to go with Sodapop as she would have been with you." Pony kind of gave Darry a gentle slap on the arm and turned and headed back towards his room. "Good night, Darry."

"Good night, Pon." Darry watched as Ponyboy disappeared back into his room. Once he heard Pony shut his door, Darry moved on back into the living room to shut the lamp off. But before he hit the switch he took one more glance at the door hoping that it would open any second now, but when it didn't, Darry knew that Sodapop was gonna win this round. He shuffled his way back to his room checking once more on Sara. When he opened her door he just stood there leaning on the door jamb watching his little sister sleep. It was nice, for the first time in a week she might actually get some rest. He sneaked in and pulled some of the fallen covers back up on her, and slipped in a quick, soft kiss onto her forehead and proceeded back to his room. He took his clothes off and slipped into a clean t-shirt and hopped into bed. He laid there thinking about his conversation with Soda and wondered if what Soda said was true. Was he afraid of showing up to a Father-Daughter dance? Was he afraid that if he did take her that it would be making things more of a reality? That he was more than just a brother to Sara, more than just a guardian? Would it be the beginning of fatherhood? And if so, that scared him more than anything.