Chapter 41

Soda hadn't been walking for too long before he came upon the place that he was hoping would be his safe haven for the night. All the lights were off inside and so he moved through the yard jumping a bit when the neighbor's dog started barking at him. Once his heart stopped beating a hundred miles an hour he continued through the yard. Once he came to the window he was looking for he let out a low moan noticing that it was closed shut. He looked around hoping to find some small pebbles to toss at it. It took him a few minutes to find the right size pebbles that would be enough to make a noise, but not too much to break the window. He trotted back to the spot and placed his paper bag on the lawn and started tossing the pebbles up towards the window. After a few handfuls he noticed that someone had arrived at the window. The silhouette pushed the curtain and shade back to see who the hell was tossing pebbles at their window. The window slowly flew open and the person looked down at Sodapop. In a low voice Soda heard, "What's up?"

"Do you think I can crash here for tonight?"

"Sure. I'll be right down to let you in." Sodapop ran back around to the front of the house where he waited for the door to open. The front porch light almost blinded Sodapop so he shielded his eyes away from the light.

"Jeez, Darry that mad at you that he threw you out?"

"Not really, I just needed to get away. So is it alright if I crash here for a while?" Soda asked moving into the house.

"It's fine for tonight. Shhhh we've gotta keep it down though. Don't wanta wake up my Old Man."

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Darry was sleeping pretty soundly until he heard a yell. The yell was just loud enough in pitch that it woke him from his slumber. He laid there waiting to see if there were gonna be anymore yells, but all he heard was some shuffling around. He decided to get up and check out what was going on. He threw the covers off of him and grabbed for some nearby sweats and pulled them on, along with a tshirt that on the end of his bed. Darry shuffled out of the door where he almost practically ran into Ponyboy who looked all befuddled. "Ponyboy? What's wrong?"Darry asked in a groggy voice.

"Darry I thought you said that you weren't going to throwing Soda out of the house?"

"What are you talking about Pony? I didn't throw him out." Darry started pushing Pony back towards his room.

"Soda's gone, Dar. I woke up, and rolled over to find his side empty. It looks like he hasn't been there at all." Darry moved back to the boys' room to examine it for his own eyes. Darry placed his arm up on the doorframe and rested his head on it, banging it a few times. "What happened with you two? Why isn't he here?" Pony was shaking some trying not to cry. Darry instantly noticed that Ponyboy was shook up about this, but something told him it was a little bit more.

"Pony, what woke you up?" Darry asked. Pony just shrugged his shoulders, but gave it away when he darted his eyes from Darry and down to the floor. "Come here little buddy." Darry placed one arm around Pony and pulled him into his chest and felt him shaking. "It's gonna be alright Pon. Sodapop probably at Buck's or something, it'll be ok. Do you want to talk about that dream that woke you up?"

Pony shook his head no, and tried to change the subject back to Sodapop. "Whaa… what did you say to him to make him leave?" Pony's voice cracked.

"Things I shouldn't of said Pony. Just things I shouldn't of said." Darry gently pushed Ponyboy back and brushed his long bangs out of his face and took a good long hard look at his brother. Darry could tell that he was fighting back the tears and that practically broke Darry's heart. Gosh how much this kid relies on Sodapop. "Pony, talk to me, what's really got you shook up?" Pony dipped his head in embarrassment.

"Nothing. It's just, I umm, woke up startled a bit and went to roll over and then I noticed that Sodapop wasn't there. I reached over to feel his spot and it was cold Dar, cold."

"Pony I'm sure he just needed to clear his head some from our fight. He's probably just with the boys or something. Why don't you try to go on back to bed, and don't worry about Sodapop, Pon. He's alright. He'll probably waltz in during breakfast or something." Darry went to ruffle the top of Pony's head when Pony suddenly leaned back into Darry's chest.

"I'm worried, Dar." Pony whispered.

"Don't be, Pony. Here let's get you back into bed." Darry said guiding Ponyboy over towards the boys' bed. Darry watched as Ponyboy slowly crawled in and got comfortable.

"You don't have to stand there Dar. You can go back to sleep." Pony said pulling the covers up to his chin.

"Are ya sure? I can stay here for a little bit until you fall asleep, if that helps." Darry usually relied on Sodapop to comfort Pony after a nightmare, but now it looked like he was going to have to be the one to do it instead.

"Nah, I'm fine Dar." Pony wasn't sounding very convincing when he added a "Good night."

"Get some sleep little buddy." Darry pretended to walk out the door, but actually he stayed in the doorway watching Pony. It only took a few seconds of watching him before he heard subtle sobs flowing through the quiet room. Why did he even second guess that Pony was alright, all the signs were there, so why was Darry surprised by the sobs. But then again, Darry knew deep down inside that Ponyboy wasn't ok after all. As Darry stood there all he could think of was why did Ponyboy always think he needs to play it cool in front of him? Everyone knew that Ponyboy was the extra sensitive one out of all the Curtis boys, so why did he insist on trying to hide his emotions? Darry listened to Pony's sobs for another minute before entering back into the boys' room. He rounded the bed and sat on the edge where he instantly started rubbing Pony's leg. Pony quickly tried to brush the tears away when he felt Darry sit down on the bed.

"I guess I'm just a little spooked, I don't mean to keep you up." Pony managed through heavy sobs.

"I'll stay right here until you don't need me anymore." Darry said will all sincerity.

"That'll be real nice." Pony answered with an uneven tone.

Darry stuck to his word and stayed with Pony until he heard him lightly snoring. He quietly got up and found himself moving into the living room. He looked around like Sodapop was just gonna pop up somewhere and when Darry knew he was only fooling himself he moved over to the front door and slowly opened it and glanced out into the moonlit yard. He doesn't really know why he was doing this, but he was just hoping to maybe find Sodapop just hanging out or something. As he stood there taking in the crisp spring air he took a few deep breaths and then softly closed the door. He ventured back through the kitchen noticing the clock reading three thirty five. Wow, that alarm would be going off before he knew it. He checked once more on Ponyboy and then moved to check on Sara. Darry remembered he never shut her music off, but as he entered her room he heard no static or even any light illuminating from it, which told him someone already shut it off, Soda he thought. Darry moved back to his room and flopped onto his bed without even undressing.

Morning came before Darry wanted it to. He hit the alarm and fumbled out of bed. He grabbed some clean clothes and headed for the shower. The house was painfully quiet that morning. Before he took a shower there was one more pressing issue to get to before that, checking the boys' room. He ducked his head into the room and he automatically felt his heart drop to his feet, still no Sodapop. His side of the bed was untouched. Darry dragged his feet back to the bathroom where he ran a nice hot shower. As he stood inside the tub, he let the hot water run down his face and onto his back and watched it drip off of him and bounce down the drain. He was contemplating on if he should take the day off and go and try to hunt Sodapop down, or just hope that he would wander back home sometime tonight? It was the what if's that started running through his achy head. What if Soda didn't show up to work? What if he wasn't gonna be there to get Sara off the bus. What if he couldn't get Pony or one of the guys to get her? The what if's soon turned into many more unanswered questions like who would watch her until he got home? How long would this last? Great, just great Darry thought. Hopefully Ponyboy could get her off the bus today, just in case Sodapop has up and gone crazy. Darry hated to leave the hot shower and the peacefulness that it provided but he knew he would have a lot of explaining to do with the absence of Soda this morning and he might as well get it started. He gave the youngest two a few more minutes to sleep while he threw on coffee and made lunches. He was going to take the easy way out this morning and just offer up cereal and toast for breakfast. Darry moved from one end of the hall to the other waking up the only two left in the house. He banged on the boys' door to get Ponyboy up. "Rise and shine sleepy head." Pony just let out a low moan and tried to throw the pillow back over his head when Darry banged the door again. "Ponyboy! Up and at 'em."

"I'm getting up Dar. Just stop banging would ya?"

Darry laughed. "I'll stop banging when your butt is up and outta that bed." Pony rolled outta bed and smirked.

"Are ya happy now?"

"Yup, now get dress. Cereal and toast out on the table when you're ready." Darry moved away from bedroom one and onto bedroom two. He was a little bit kinder in how he woke this Curtis child up though. Instead of banging on the door, Darry started banging around in her dresser and closet getting out an outfit for Sara to wear today. He decided on a red and white checkered skirt and white collared shirt. The noise that Darry was making on purpose slowly awoke Sara. "Morning Sara, it's time to get up." Sara let out a loud yawn and a big stretch with her arms. "Sleep well?" Darry asked moving over to open her shades.

"Yeah." She mumbled while pushing her covers off to the side.

"Good. Get dress and come out for breakfast." Darry tossed Sara her outfit and ruffled her hair and didn't mention a word about Sodapop, for he knew it would come up soon enough. Sara moved at snail's pace but eventually got herself ready and bounced out to the kitchen table. There was Ponyboy already chowing down a bowl of raisin bran and some toast. She slid into her chair without speaking and watched as Ponyboy poured her a bowl of cereal and offered her toast but Sara refused the bread. What she didn't know was that Darry had come up behind her and noticed that she had refused the toast and he gave her the good ole eyeball. Sara started to curl her lips up and scrunch her nose but Darry stopped it immediately. "Sara! Every time I have to remind you about eating, I'll tack on extra chores or extend your restrictions, so you best get that scowl off that face and eat some of that breakfast that Pony just got for you."

"Yes, Darry." Sara said digging into the cereal. The three sat in the kitchen with very little talk, and Sara found it odd that she couldn't hear any rustling from Soda someplace else in the house. She took a few more bites before it really began to bother her, the silence of course. "Where's Sodapop?" She finally asked what was on her mind.

Ponyboy looked up from his bowl and eyed Darry as to see what he was gonna say. "He's not here." Darry said bluntly.

"Why? Where is he?" Sara wasn't trying to be annoying, it was just unlike any other morning and curiosity had gotten to her.

"Ummm, he had to leave early this morning that's all." Darry fumbled for an excuse. He wasn't accustomed to lie to his siblings, but he was going to have to bend the truth a bit here with Sara.

"Why?" Sara being a typical six year old, just had to know why, it was just the nature of the beast.

"Because he had an errand that needed to be done, that's why. Now finish up and go brush your teeth." Darry instructed as he placed his coffee cup down in the sink.

"What's so important that he had to do it this early in the morning? And how did he get there?" Sara just couldn't let it go and Darry was about to burst with frustration from all her questions.

"Sara, stop worrying about Sodapop. You were told to do something, now please just go and do it."

"Jeez Darry you don't have to get so mad. I was just asking that's all." Sara pouted as she moved up out of her chair to hand Darry her dirty dishes.

Darry let out a loud sigh, for it wasn't Sara's fault. "I'm not mad Sara, just tired that's all. Sorry for being short with you." Darry said reaching for her bowl.

"It's just weird without him here." Sara mumbled while turning to go brush her teeth. It was then she heard the screen door bang up against the house and in strolled Two-Bit, Johnny and Steve.

"Hey Little Curtis when did Darry up and decide to send you to a Catholic School?" Two-Bit joked.

"Huh?" Sara not being Catholic didn't understand the reference that Two-Bit was making about her outfit so she looked towards Darry for help.

"Ah, forget Kid. You'll get it when you're older." Sara shrugged her shoulders and moved onto the bathroom like Darry had requested.

Ponyboy was placing his dirty dishes in the sink when he noticed that Steve was acting a bit odd. It was almost like he was trying to hide behind Two-Bit and Johnny. Now Pony remembered hearing Darry threaten Steve to get out and to not come back until he said he could, but this was different. It was like he didn't want to draw attention to himself for some reason. And that wasn't like Steve. Pony always thought that Steve usually needed to be the center of attention at all times. But he was being stiff and quiet and wasn't making eye contact with anyone, especially Darry. And that wasn't like Steve. Pony had a feeling something was up with him. His first thought was that Steve knew something about Sodapop's whereabouts. Pony would have to try to figure out a way to get some answers from Steve, but knew that it would be difficult. As Pony was walking by he and Steve locked eyes for one brief second and that's all it took for Pony to know that Steve knew something, but for now he let it go and went to brush his teeth. When he entered he found Sara struggling with a knot in her hair. Pony let out a small moan. He quickly moved over and took the brush out of her hand and started working on the knot. "Usually Soda helps." Sara spoke softly. Pony nodded his head in agreement. Pony was ready to say something when Sara spoke again. "He's not really running an errand is he Pony?" Pony stopped working on the knot and looked at her in the mirror. He didn't really know what to say so he just shook his head back and forth. "Where is he then Pony?"

"I don't know Sara."

"When's he coming back?" She asked looking into Pony's concerned face.

"I don't know that either." Pony started back on the knot.

"Is it because of what happened last night?" Sara asked with sadness in her voice.

"Probably." Pony continued to work on her hair as Sara was trying to process it all.

Sara was about to say something when Pony yanked at the knot in her hair. "Ouch! Pony not so hard." Sara whined.

"Well you've got one hell of a knot in there. How the frig do you manage to get these knots?" But before Sara could even answer Darry had come up behind Ponyboy and slapped the back of head.

"Just because you think I'm not around doesn't mean you can use that kind of language." Darry warned tearing the brush from Ponyboy and taking over on the knot. Sara cringed, for if she thought Ponyboy was being hard, now Darry was gonna be twice as bad. But to Sara's surprise Darry place his left hand on the top of her head and with the brush in his right made a fast sweep down and soon the knot was out. He took two barrettes and made a quick swoop up and latched it and then turned Sara to the other side and placed the other one on the opposite side and now her hair was out of her face. "Gosh, Sara your hair is really growing fast. It's only been about a month since we've cut it and I swear it's already grown two inches." Sara smiled and touched the barrettes with her hands, but Darry swooshed them away. "Sara, you best come home with these in your hair. They're your last pair. You've already lost two other's because you take them out half way through the day, so you best keep these in."

"I will." She answered.

"Go grab your lunchbox and book bag and meet me out in the truck. I'll be right there." Darry spoke sternly.

"Ok, Dar." Sara skipped off and Darry knew he needed to do one more thing before leaving for the day. He moved back to the boys' room where he was hoping to catch Ponyboy before he left. As he was entering he heard Two-Bit holler to Ponyboy.

"Hey Pony, let's shake a leg."

"I'm coming, hold your horses." Pony yelled back as he was grabbing his books from his desk. He caught a flash out of the corner of his eye and noticed Darry standing in the door. "I'll see ya later Dar."

Darry put his hand out and stopped Ponyboy in his tracks. "I need to talk with you before you head out." Pony tried motioning towards Two-Bit and the boys. "They can wait. I need you to get Sara off the bus today." Ponyboy started to interrupt when Darry put his hand up to stop him. "Pony we need to be on the safe side just in case Soda isn't at the DX today."

"He'll be there Dar."

"Just in case, be there at 3:30."

"Ponyboy, let's hustle!" Two-Bit yelled again.

"I've gotta go, Darry. I'll see ya tonight." Darry moved to the side so Ponyboy could get by.

"Bye, Pon." Darry watched Pony bend down and speak quietly to Sara who was sitting on their front stairs. He moved into the kitchen and gathered up his thermos and lunch bucket and scooped up the keys from the counter. As he moved closer to the door he caught the tail-end of their conversation.

"Promise me that you won't worry all day about Soda?"

"I'll try not to." Sara responded sadly.

"Have a good day. Two-Bit and I will pick you up today. I'll see you this afternoon." Pony placed a soft kiss on the top of her head and ran off to catch a ride with the boys where he hoped to get some answers on where the heck Sodapop was at.

"Bye Pony." Sara yelled as she heard Darry shutting the door from behind her. Remembering that she was told to wait in the truck she jumped up like a flash and headed towards their old ford pickup.

As Pony crawled into the car and slammed the door he looked over at Steve. "Where's Soda?" He asked with some attitude.

"Don't know what ya talkin' about kid. Last time I checked I wasn't his keeper." Steve shot back. Ponyboy looked back out the window and spoke again.

"Yeah, well if you know where he is and you don't tell Darry, you know your dead meat right?"

"I'm shaking in my sneakers kid. Besides, I can't much blame him for taking off like he did. You three are enough to make anyone go crazy." Steve hissed. The two boys just glared at each other while Two-Bit tried to change the subject about a fight he witnessed last night between some members of the Royal River gang and Tim Shepards' gang. Pony wasn't satisfied with what information or lack of information he got from Steve. But he also felt a bit of relief because Pony knew that Steve had seen Sodapop and knew of his whereabouts. Ponyboy remained quiet for the rest of the ride to school thinking mostly of Sodapop. He wasn't much for praying for he never felt like God was much on his side after the death of his parents, but he did send up a little prayer that Soda would rejoin the family sometime that evening.

It was weird driving to Cathy' s without dropping Sodapop off first, though Sara did take note of how slowly Darry drove by the DX. He didn't stop but Sara could tell that Darry's eyes were searching for any sign of their brother, but no such luck. After they drove by the DX Sara thought that this would be the perfect time to try to get Darry to answer the questions that she had from last night.

"Darry?" She asked sweetly.

"Uh, huh?" He said seeming like he was deep in his own thoughts.

"What were Sodapop and Sandy doing last night in his bed?"

Darry cleared his throat and quickly came out of his deep thoughts. He took his eyes off the road for just a second to look at Sara. He did tell her that they would talk about it today, but this wasn't what he really had in mind, but then on the other hand the ride to Cathy's was a lot shorter than being corner by her in their home later tonight. "Well, you see sometimes Sara, when people love each other they like to show each other how much, and that's what Sodapop and Sandy were doing." Darry was hoping that this would be a good enough explanation for his little sister. She sat in complete silence for there was no music playing in the truck this morning due to Soda's absence. Darry let a small grin come to his face thinking that he actually was gonna get away with it, until he stopped at a traffic light, and that's when Sara started in.

"That doesn't make sense, because Soda loves me and.." Darry knew what she was about to say and cut her off immediately.

"No, Sara, it's not the same."

"What do you mean it's not the same? I thought love was love."

"It is, but it's a different kind of love. It's hard to explain. When you're older you'll get it." Once the light turned green Darry proceeded through while Sara sat quiet again looking out the window. Darry wasn't sure if he should breathe a sigh of relief yet and just when he figured it was ok to, Sara piped up again.

"So did Momma and Dadda do that kind of stuff? Because they loved each other right?" Darry could start feeling his cheeks heat up with embarrassment.

"I suppose so." He tried keeping it simple.

"I never saw them, like I did Soda and Sandy." Sara added.

"That's because it supposed to be a private thing, Sara. Not meant to be seen by others. It's something special."

"Then why were they doing in front of me?" Sara asked with a tilt of her head.

"They weren't. You were supposed to be asleep, right?" Darry could see almost see the steam rolling out of Sara's ears she was thinking so hard.

"Will Sodapop and Sandy be doing that a lot? Because I know he loves Sandy a lot, he told me so."

"I assure you Sara that will not be happening ever again in our home. You don't have to worry about it alright?" Darry turned the blinker on ready to pull onto Cathy's street and praising the lord that this conversation was about to end.

"That's good, because I didn't like it. It kind of scared me."

"I bet it did, Babygirl. But I promise you, you won't have to worry about it ever happening again."

"Not even you? Or Ponyboy?" Sara asked innocently. Darry almost tried not to choke on his response.

"Defiantly not Ponyboy!" Darry almost shouted.

"What about you Darry? When and if you find a girl to love like Soda." Darry couldn't help by turn red in the face.

"No Sara. No one is gonna be doing that anytime soon in this house. Got it?"

Sara sat quietly and Darry was keeping his fingers crossed that this was the end of it, but Sara continued to surprise him with more comments. "I don't like how Soda acts around Sandy. She's nice enough an all, but I don't like it when she's around." Sara said looking straight at Darry hoping for him to agree with her about this.

"She's an ok girl Sara."

"Did you know that's the only reason why Soda wants to take me to the dance tomorrow night?" Darry seemed a bit shocked for he hadn't heard Sodapop talk about this.

"Why do you say that?" Darry asked pulling the truck to a stop at the curb of Cathy's.

"She told me so last night. Well not in those same words but that her father was taking her and her sister Shirley to the dance and she couldn't wait to see Sodapop all dressed up."

"That's news to me Sara. I don't really think it's true though. Sodapop hasn't mentioned a thing about that being the reason why he's taking you. Maybe you should talk to Soda about this. I bet you'll find there's no truth to that." Darry tried offering some neutral advice.

"I'm never talking to him again." Sara shouted and before Darry could warn her about the tone she was using she continued to shout. "Besides, there's nothing to talk to him about because I'm not going! I've changed my mind! I don't want to go anymore. It's just a stupid dance anyway." And in a swift motion Sara reached down and grabbed her bag and opened the truck door and started to dart towards Cathy's. As she running off she stopped to bid good bye to Darry. "If you see Sodapop before I do, tell him he's off the hook for tomorrow night." And before Darry could even respond or get out of the truck Sara had ran up to the door where Cathy was waiting for her. Cathy waved to Darry and moved back into the house. Darry couldn't believe his ears, what the hell went down in his house last night? More than he bargained for that was for sure. He slammed his hands against the steering column and swore out loud, "Damn you, Sodapop Curtis!"