I knew it would come to this.
Just two days after our quarrel I wake up to Lily sobbing, of all things.
It was different, to see the ego-strong Lily hunched over the counter, blabbing incoherently, crying her eyes out. I feel bad admitting I watched for a few minutes. I was spying on something. Lily was weak at the moment, and I was just watching.
In the end I summoned the strength and courage to help her upstairs. The courage came from the belief that she wouldn't remember anything anyways; she was so far gone.
I left some water and pills. She'd probably think she did that herself by some miracle. The gal to have such ego amazes me.
I've been avoiding her all day. I try to remain happy, but just thinking of Lily sobbing made me feel sad all over again.
She has a talent for making me feel depressed, doesn't she.
But I wondered, if she was truly so upset about out quarrel, why wouldn't she try to right what was wrong? I am not trying again, sorry. But that got me thinking; what if it wasn't our quarrel. Maybe she just feels too rich, too full of herself, and too alone. Maybe she feels like she failed life.
Of course, that thought made me happier. Please detect the sarcasm.
From that early morning on, I couldn't get Lily out of my mind, to say the very least. Her barely-clad body was plaguing my mind, her sadness was rotting it.
I couldn't help feeling responsible. I couldn't help feeling like I should do something.
Of course, I won't let her affect me so much that I'd actually go out of my way for her, again. I just need to focus on something else, preferably something happier, and get on with my life...exactly the contrary of what Lily's doing, in short. Her method of living life couldn't possibly be healthy.
I'll just block her out of my mind. Let it be. I won't let her wake me up at three in the morning, and I won't stretch out a hand only to have it slapped away.