Wow, chapter thirty, I didn't think I'd get this far but yay!

Chapter thirty: Castor's POV

I awoke to find my cousin with her feet propped up against my bed, her pink hair was the second thing I caught, then her grin and then just… her. "Madam Pomfrey… if it's not too much to ask… could you please give me five secs alone with him now that he's awake?" Tonks sighed at the lady who was continuing to fuss over me as I groaned. She sighed and stormed off as Tonks gave a slight smile and a wave. "Took you long enough to wake up. We came as soon as we heard but Pomfrey wouldn't let us near you… something about you being 'unhealthy and unstable…' anyway now that I can finally chat to you… I would just kindly like to ask what the hell happened to you?" She sighed. I groaned, not wanting to go over the story again but she held up her hand, "I don't mean about the kidnapping and everything but Cas… why did you run after her… I love you. Mum and dad love you… you can't just do that to us… I thought you were dead," her eyes filled with tears and I felt guilt rise through the pit of my stomach. She was right, I had been selfish… Dumbledore had only been trying to help me last night when he talked to me but I had coldly brushed him off… because I was upset that he was right. Everything he said was right.

"I'm sorry," I looked away, finding it hard to really look her in the eyes, knowing that I'd hurt her and upset her.

"I know… I know it's hard seeing them but… I am your family, mum and dad are your family and what you do… it hurts us Castor. I couldn't… thinking you were dead was too much," she gulped, wiping her eyes slightly. "Sorry… I know you didn't mean to hurt us. I'm being too harsh on you," she whispered to me. I nodded and closed my eyes for a second, trying desperately to regain my composure before I looked at her again. She was right though; I had been unfair and had put them through so much in one stupid spur of the moment decision.

"Where are they, Aunty Andy and Uncle Ted?" I asked, as though on queue they rushed through the doors and both of them engulfed me in a massive hug. I couldn't help but feel slightly warmed by this. "We've got some fresh clothes from your room in Gryffindor tower… Neville Longbottom was nice enough to show us around," Andy smiled, kissing the top of my forehead. Usually I'd feel embarrassed but I was so happy that I didn't… I felt joy, I did have family. These people hugging me and these people who were almost in tears over the thought of me dying were my family. I grinned at the thought of Neville, I still had him as my friend. I didn't want to think about how Harry and maybe others felt about me… knowing that I had defended my mother… although I was sure most people wouldn't know that Harry had tried to torture her they had seen me running after her and Harry and it seemed plausible to me that most people would suspect I had gone to protect my mother rather than help Harry get her as that just wouldn't make sense as everyone else had stayed instead of following Harry, even Remus who was no doubt grief stricken. Why would I be any different as my reaction to Sirius's death wasn't nearly as strong as Harry's had been because Sirius had been like a father to Harry but I wasn't as close, so the only reason I would go after them was to help my mother, not harm her. Not to mention the fact that I had gone after her through the floo network, that only made it seem more likely that I wanted to help her, no one in their right minds would chase after Bellatrix Lestrange even if they wanted revenge… Harry hadn't chased after her, I had though, because I wanted my mother, which was what people would think. My heart filled with dread, what if people thought that I had gone with her because I was in line with the Death Eaters and instead of being captured for days I was really being briefed on what my next move should be? I gulped… no one would believe that… would they? Surely my new scar would be enough to prove it… but I didn't know. I didn't want everyone to whisper about me and hate me again… I couldn't deal with it.

"Colin was in here earlier," Ted said, bringing me out of my troubled thoughts as I looked up at him with a sigh. He smiled and ruffled my hair. My eyes widened, Colin… I thought Colin hated me? Apparently not… I felt a slight smile build up inside, maybe he was still my friend, it was just that Fabian had been controlling him. I felt as though I was on fire with happiness at just the mere idea that Colin still liked me. "Just sat with you for about an hour… right after him, Luna came in and sat holding your hand… I don't know how long she was here but it was a damn long time son, she only went 'cause Madam Pomfrey shooed her away. Neville came too, I think even Fred and George have visited and as I'm sure you know they're living in London!" My eyes filled with even more tears at the thought of all these people who cared for me, especially Luna, she had stood by me through it all, even when I had been rude to her and pushed her away, how could I have been so stupid? Even just for a second? I needed to talk to Fabian, when I got the chance… see how he felt about me. That could wait for later though, first things first I needed a shower. "We really missed you Castor," my uncle smiled hugging me, "You're very brave, going off to fight like that. Especially with them," he said referring to my parents, "being…," I guessed he just thought it would be better to stop. Realizing that talking more about them only made my wounds greater. Still, I wasn't sure about my father but my mother… she wasn't evil, damaged, deranged sure but evil… no.

I noticed my aunt wipe her eyes and I had no doubt that Sirius's death was still fresh in her heart, especially the fact that her own sister had killed him, someone that I'm sure at one time she loved unconditionally and maybe even did still love. She chose not to mention it which I was thankful for, I just wanted to get clean and forget about all the drama for just a few seconds, which I knew would be harder than it sounded. That shower was the best I had ever had, I watched the dried blood which had caked me fall off and pool on the floor in disgust, with my hair wet I quickly got changed and with my sketchbook, drawing utensils, the photo scrapbook of my parents and the box that my mother had given me in my pocket, set off. I wanted to be alone and the only places that I could think to be alone were the toilets where I could lock myself in a stall or the room of requirement but there was always the chance that someone from DA would be in there. Although there could of course be someone in the toilets it would hopefully be more or less empty, as there were so many different toilets instead of just one set. Finding it empty I just sat on the floor instead of in a cubical and opened my sketchpad, I'd drawn some drawings, my mother locked in battle with Sirius… Harry's angered face as he chased after my mother… my mother tracing Sirius's name on the family tree. I growled ripping the pages out as though I could just rip them from my memory, I didn't want to see those images, be reminded of that day. I flushed them down the toilet and closed my sketchbook, knowing that if I began to draw it would not be happy, it would just be memories of the battle. I didn't want to touch the scrapbook either… worried that if I looked at his or her face I'd just see more images of the battle. I just wanted to be free of them, of the curse of being a Death Eater's child. Still, I was too curious about the box in my pocket to not open it. Even if it meant thinking of my mother as she had given it to me. I wondered what was inside it as my fingers clamped around the shoebox, I hadn't made it back to size yet, as I'd only just brought it out of my pocket but I stopped, quickly shoving it back in there before I could open it. I could hear footsteps, echoing as the door swung open just as I pulled my hand out of my pocket and scrambled to stand up, leaving my other items on the floor. Draco Malfoy was who greeted me, my eyes stared back into his, my frown reflected his frown. I wondered if his father had told him… of how he had made my mother torture me.

"Did he tell you then? Your dad… of how he forced her to torture me?" I whispered, almost wanting to shut up but I couldn't. I almost felt bad for my cousin, none of it was his fault and yet I was kind of blaming him for his father's actions.

His eyes suddenly brimmed with tears and a dark steely look which made my stomach plunge, "He's in Azkaban. They sent him to Azkaban…," his breathing was growing heavy as he pulled out his wand and pointed it straight at me. I hadn't wanted to duel, not even a confrontation but my big mouth had got me into one.

"D-Draco I'm sorry," I truly was… I knew what it was like to have your parents taken away from you, to be the child of Death Eaters. I knew his pain. It was something I wouldn't wish on anyone. I knew what it was like to have everyone expect you to turn out like your parents… it had been hypocritical for me to blame Draco for his father's actions when all I wanted was for people to see me as my own person. "I know what it's like."

"But you don't! You don't have this pressure! Everyone telling you how you have to be and act a certain way," I knew that he was saying that I didn't have everyone forcing me to be a Death Eater, like he did. I felt terrible, I wanted to crawl away and hide… Draco had things bad. For him, it appeared that the only life he could lead was the life of a Death Eater. At least… at least I didn't have that.

"I'm sorry Draco… I'm-," I muttered but he yelled expelliarmus and my wand flew out of my hand and it clattered and rolled along the floor. Draco was shaking, so close to tears, it was as though he didn't want to hurt me but was so emotional that he just couldn't stop. If there was one fact about Death Eater pureblood families I knew it was that emotion… raw sad emotion like this… was weakness. Draco would rather be angry and attack me than break down in tears… I guessed I could understand it, slightly. His first spell was engorgio and I dived away as the mirror behind me shattered, sending shards of glass flying at me. I dived towards my wand and felt my hand clasp around it, at the same time another of Draco's spells were fired. His next spell was incendio and bursts of fire sped from his wand straight towards me, I rolled and just dodged, feeling the edges of my t-shirt catch on fire I beat it putting it out while spiriting behind a sink to dodge another spell from Draco. The sink exploded and I realized that as much as I didn't want to I had to go back on the offensive, I screamed as a shard of porcelain cut at my arm before hitting the wall behind me as shrapnel from our battle flew out in all directions.

Water began to spew out from the sink as I gulped, scrambling up and trying to find somewhere else to hide as I thought of my next spell. I couldn't think in time though as I found myself out in the open of the trashed bathroom. He prepared to fire another spell but I beat him to it, "OBSCURO!" I screamed, hoping that if he couldn't see I might not have to hurt him and I could just run out. However he blocked my spell and yelled one of his own straight back.

"CONFRINGO!" He screamed, he was still shaking but he was dueling well, I only just dodged the spell as the cubical door behind me burst into flames. I tried to cast another spell as I ran over to the wall, trying desperately to think of a way out but he beat me to it, "EXPULSO!" The wall behind me exploded and I was slammed into the nearest sink with great force that all the wind was knocked out of me and I felt a slow trickle of blood bubble and ooze from my nose and from a cut on my right eyebrow, my glasses were falling off my face and I readjusted them with one hand. "Don't. Move." He yelled at me, as I felt my wand fly from my hand to his, he continued to point his at me as he moved even closer until he was finally on me. He bent down and thrust his wand into my neck, it hurt but it was nothing compared to the pain I had felt from the cruciatus curse. I shuddered even thinking about it. I closed my eyes, wondering if I was finally going to die. As Draco continued to press his wand into my throat. I didn't want him to kill me, not because I was afraid of death but because I wanted Draco to prove everyone wrong… prove that he was better than what everyone expected of him. Prove that he was not a murderous Death Eater. "How did it feel?" He whispered, and I opened my eyes in a fluttered and stared at him.

"Huh?"

"How did it feel? Being… you know… t-tortured?" He whispered so quietly that I almost had to ask him to repeat what he had said. The boy was paler than usual… deathly white. He took his wand away from my neck but continued to point it at me. "Just tell me… please tell me how it felt 'cause I'm sorry… that he… he told her to… torture you. I'm sorry," and then he finally did it, he broke down in tears and I locked my arms around my cousin, hugging him tightly as he cried into my shoulder.

"I'm sorry too Draco, I'm sorry too," I whispered, never wanting to let him go.

So what really is in that shoebox? Could this be a new friendship between Castor and Draco? Will Castor become friends with Colin and Fabian again? What does Harry and others think about him going through the floo network after his mother? All soon to be answered folks