One Moment
Chapter 2: Double and Nothing

Characters/Pairings: Starrk, Lilynette, Ukitake, Kyouraku. No pairings.
Rating: Still PG.
Words: ~3450
Chapter Summary: Starrk wakes up. He finds two swords, two Captains, and some difficult questions waiting for him. Oh, and Lilynette.

Starrk woke up to white.

He was starting to really hate the colour in the past few months. It was always what surrounded him whenever he opened his eyes. Sometimes he could see brighter colours out of the corner of his eyes from his cushions, but now they all seem rather far away from him.

Letting out a breath, he made to close his eyes again. Maybe Lilynette would let him have a few more minutes of sleep… Wait.

Something was very wrong. There was complete, utter silence in his head. It wasn't supposed to be this way; even when Lilynette was asleep when he wasn't, he could still feel her, a constant buzz at the back of his mind, almost like muffled snoring.

Was she called to the throne room? What could Aizen-sama have needed her for?

Starrk blinked. If Aizen-sama had taken Lilynette to the throne room, then it meant that he should have woken up hours ago and had probably missed a meeting. He should probably wake up and go get her. He dragged his hand through his hair, opening his eyes fully.

And that was when he saw the pink. There was a pink kimono draped over his form, its colours bright and gaudy over the white sheets. He didn't have sheets in his room; he didn't want to have a bed. And the kimono…

He recognised this. And, in that moment, the memories slammed right back into his head.

Neither of them ever wanted to be the single Hollow again. Not now, not ever. Because it meant that they would be alone again. Even if they shared the same mind, they couldn't…

"Lilynette?"

The sound of his own voice echoed around the room. He was alone. He was completely alone. She wasn't there anymore. The annoying buzz in his mind and the even more irritating presence by his side… Starrk remembered the moments he spent hoping, wishing that the trick would work, just so Lilynette would be able to revive.

But she wasn't here. He couldn't hear her.

We'll go everywhere. Together.

Throwing off the blanket, Starrk stumbled out of bed. His chest was burning, pain spreading outwards, but it didn't matter. He slammed the door open, tearing down the doorway, forgetting pesquisa and sonido in his sheer, utter panic.

"Lilynette!"

There were people around him – people? – trying to calm him down, reach out for him. But Starrk pushed past them. He reached out futilely for the bond between them, for the connection inside his mind that told him that she was there, but there was only emptiness.

"Lilynette!"

She couldn't be dead. There was no way she was dead. He had heard her, felt her, right before he fell unconscious.

"Starrk?"

That was her voice. He turned around.

Lilynette was dressed in a pretty, dark green yukata with pink flowers at the bottom. She stood at the doorway of one of the private rooms, her single eye wide as she stared at him. Starrk opened his mouth, but he couldn't say a word; couldn't find any that could encompass the sheer relief he felt at seeing her.

She started to move, but Starrk was faster. They slammed together in the doorway, her mask fragment impacting against his ribs, sending pain screaming through his nerves. Starrk gasped, but he didn't push her away. Instead, he pulled her even closer, feeling her warmth and solidity against him.

She was real. She was still alive.

"You stupid lazy bastard… you kept sleeping even after I woke up. The stupid Shinigami told me you were in a 'coma' or something, but you were just being lazy, weren't you?"

He really missed how she could insult him even when she was hugging him.

There were people staring at him. Starrk sighed, lifting his head from Lilynette to meet two pairs of too-familiar eyes. The Captain with the long white hair was sitting on the bed, and, beside him on the opposite side from Starrk was the one who nearly killed him.

Starrk lifted up the pink kimono he had been dragging around the hallway.

"I came to return this and take something of mine back," he said, trying to keep his voice even.

Lilynette punched him on the shoulder. "I don't belong to you, dammit!"

Starrk fell immediately to his knees. The punch wasn't particularly hard, not like her usual kicks, but the small spark of pain made everything come back and beat his face in. He groaned and fell over onto his back, right on the floor. He wasn't meant for so much exertion right after he woke up… He closed his eyes for a moment.

The murmuring from the outside grew louder. He heard footsteps. He ignored all of it.

"Starrk?"

"Mm?"

"You're really here, right? I'm not dreaming?" There was a note of insecurity in her voice. Starrk reached up, rubbing a hand over her helmet.

"Mm."

"… I still can't feel you, Starrk."

Slowly, Starrk opened his eyes. He looked at Lilynette's single one before he let out a long, low breath. "I can't feel you either," he admitted.

Lilynette stared at him. She scooted closer, still on her knees, and he lifted an arm for her to tuck herself right into his side. It didn't matter that they were on the floor; they had slept in worst places, back in Hueco Mundo. In fact, sleeping sound like a good idea right now, especially with that kimono as a blanket…

"If you tell us what you were talking about, then maybe we can help," a familiar and irritating voice said, sounding far too close. The muttering voices were gone.

Starrk cracked open an eye. He stared up at the man standing over him. What was his name again? He should remember it, but he had never been very good with names.

"You figure it out, taichou-san," he murmured, eyes sliding shut.

"How rude!" the Shinigami laughed. Instead of taking offense, however, he simply dropped himself down to sit beside them. "Don't I get some kind of repayment for the loan of my kimono?"

"I brought it back, didn't I?" Starrk waved a hand. "Besides, you can guess, so I'm not going to bother."

"He's right, Kyouraku," the white-haired Captain said.

Kyouraku let out a gusty sigh, sounding put-upon. "Well, the two of you have some kind of mental connection, in which you feel what each other feel, and you're always aware of the other person's presence. Right?"

"Mm," Starrk said agreeably. There was somewhat more, but that covered the basic gist.

He watched as the two Shinigami exchange a glance.

"Well, we might have a possible answer to your question," Kyouraku said. "But I think we'll give that once the two of you get off of the floor."

"Nope," Lilynette said, burrowing even deeper to his side.

"It can't be comfortable?" White-haired Captain said. "And we have perfectly serviceable extra beds right here in the room."

"It's comfortable," Lilynette insisted.

"You're blocking the door."

"We don't care."

She was getting into a mood. And, honestly, Starrk was too: he wished that he could just sleep here. Maybe the two Captains could continue talking so Starrk could fall asleep while listening to the voices of other people… He had never done that before – the other Espadas' wings were far from his, and none of the Numeros ever came to his – and it would be nice…

But the floor was cold and hard, and his chest was hurting again. Starrk sighed, shifting slightly. "Let's just move. They're not going to let us alone until we do."

"I don't wanna," Lilynette retorted immediately. But she opened her eye, peering at him before reaching out and pressing her small hand over his chest. "Does it still hurt?"

Starrk nodded.

"Okay then," she nodded, sitting up. "Only because you're a big baby."

He cracked a small smile before standing up. Kyouraku and the white-haired Captain both watched them as they moved over to one of the closest beds, slumping down immediately. Starrk was tempted to simply lie down, but those two promised to show him something.

"I think they left them back in your rooms," Kyouraku said. Starrk opened his mouth to ask what 'them' were, or even who 'they' were, but Kyouraku was already gone in a burst of shunpo.

Damn, but he was getting really tired of him doing that.

But Kyouraku came back almost immediately, and in his hands were… two swords? He walked over to their bed, and Starrk unconsciously pulled Lilynette closer to him, eyes narrowing at the other man.

"These suddenly appeared on your bedsides when Lilynette-chan here first woke up," Kyouraku said. Starrk tensed as he brought the swords closer, but he only sat them on the sheets. "I think something happened to the two of you after you… split apart again."

The swords were a daishou set – a wakizashi with a katana. Starrk picked up the longer blade – it seemed more suitable for him than Lilynette – and look at it. It looked almost exactly like the plain sword that he carried around his hip, but there was a design on the tsuba: teeth like his mask fragment around the edges of the border, and flame markings like Lilynette's within.

Lilynette had pulled away from him slightly to reach out for the wakizashi, holding it in her hands. Starrk glanced over at the tsuba – the design was the same.

"… Hah," he said, because there was nothing else that could be said.

Kyouraku had dragged over a chair and was sitting next to their bed, watching them.

"You said that Lilynette-chan here is the manifestation of your zanpaktou, Starrk-san," he said softly. "But I think… after what you did, the two of you split to become two separate souls, and the swords in your hands are your real zanpaktou now."

Starrk opened his mouth, but Lilynette beat him to it.

"I don't want that!" she cried. She tossed the sword away, pushing herself away from it. "I really don't want that!"

"Lilynette," Starrk tried.

"I don't want to leave you, Starrk! You promised… we both promised…"

He looked at her helplessly, uncertain of what he could say. It had never happened before; he had always known what she felt, her emotions a constant weight, like a soft blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He had never once felt so completely, utterly loss for words when it came to the other half of his soul.

Slowly, Starrk started to reach out for her.

"You're being a little hasty, Lilynette-chan," Kyouraku interrupted. Starrk's hand dropped back to his side, turning his head to stare at him.

"Your swords… I have never once seen two separate zanpaktou with the same tsuba design," he continued gently. "Even between identical twins, the designs are different.

Starrk didn't know what to think.

"From what I've heard from Lilynette-chan and Kyouraku, the two of you come from the same soul," the white-haired Captain picked up the thread, voice soft. "I don't think there could be anything that can break the connection between the two of you."

"There was one," Starrk said dully. "You did it, taichou-san."

Kyouraku looked startled, and Starrk noticed a curious guilt that flashed across his eyes.

But it was Lilynette's fist that smacked the back of his head.

"Ow!"

"Don't be silly, Starrk! I wasn't dead! I was just knocked unconscious because he," she levered a dirty glare at Kyouraku, "made me explode in my own face!"

The guilt grew even stronger. "I–"

Starrk held up a hand. "Don't make apologies you don't mean, taichou-san," he told him wryly.

Kyouraku blinked before he chuckled. Tipping his head back, he grinned at his fellow Shinigami. "See, Ukitake, I told you! He has my number after just one day!"

"You're not that difficult a person to figure out," Starrk shrugged.

The white-haired Captain – Ukitake, right – burst out laughing. His shoulders shook, and he coughed a little before he shook his head.

"That's the first time I've heard anyonesay that about Kyouraku," Ukitake said, smiling widely. "You really are quite something, Starrk-san."

"Thanks," Starrk drawled. Honestly, there must be something wrong with these two Shinigami; he had never heard anyone else praising their opponents as much as they tend to.

Though… were they still opponents? Starrk wasn't sure. His hand was still clenched around his (?) new sword, but he realised that, while Kyouraku still had his own two blades on his hip, his hands had not once drifted to them during this entire conversation.

He rubbed at his own eyes. His head was spinning again.

"Say, Starrk-san…" Kyouraku said, sounding tentative beneath the casual tone. "There's something that has been puzzling me for a while."

"What?"

"I can somewhat understand why some of the other Arrancar would follow Aizen, but from what I know of you and Lilynette-chan here… Surely you knew the kind of man he is? Why did you still follow him?"

Starrk's eyes widened. He knew that the Shinigami would ask that eventually, but he didn't think it would be so soon, and so baldly. His fingers twitched at his side, and he looked down, meeting Lilynette's gaze.

He had been the only one who could come near us for decades. He offered us strong companions.

… He was kind to us. Even though he was cruel to the others, he was kind to us.

But then the kindness in Aizen's eyes was exposed to be a lie in the end.

"Do you know what selfishness means, Starrk? It means to take without giving back."

"Am I really asking for so much in return?"

"We owed him a debt," Lilynette said eventually. "That's all."

Starrk stared blankly at the wall.

"Did you repay it?" Ukitake asked.

"He tried to kill Harribel," Lilynette told him, voice small. "There just isn't a debt after that."

"Ah," Ukitake said. He sounded as if he understood, but Starrk wondered if he really did. These two Captains acted like they had known each other for most of their lives; there was no way they could understand the sheer desperate need for companionship, for any type of companionship.

They wouldn't understand what it meant to have their only hope being snatched away by the person who promised it to them, all right before their eyes.

"If you're done asking, I'm going back to sleep," Starrk stated flatly.

"There's just one more thing," Kyouraku said, sounding apologetic. "Actually, it's the question that everyone wanted to ask since Lilynette-chan here woke up, but she said she didn't know."

Lilynette heaved a sigh. "They want to know how we managed to break Kyouka Suigetsu's Complete Hypnosis," she told her other half, sounding put upon.

Ah. Starrk looked at her. "You're being lazy," he accused. "You could've told them."

"I couldn't!" she snapped. "I'm a little better at doing that than you are, but I'm no good with explaining."

"'That'?" Ukitake asked, sounding mildly curious.

Starrk looked at him. He supposed that it wouldn't hurt to answer his questions; he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep now anyway.

"Uh…" Starrk scratched the back of his neck. "It's like… with any kind of illusions, or even a change in the environment, what the zanpaktou does is to basically… uh… cast a kind of a net over the surroundings using the wielder's reiatsu."

He paused, lifting his eyes to meet Kyouraku's before shrugging a little. "You should know what I'm talking about. Your shikai is like that too. A net over the entire surrounding area to bend it to your zanpaktou's will."

Kyouraku nodded.

"Kyouka Suigetsu is a little different," Starrk continued. "It isn't like a net. It's more like a… spider's web, because what it does is to use Aizen's reiatsu to trap the reiatsu of every single person in the area within it."

"Aizen is like a giant spider," Lilynette piped up. "And his sword is like the thread-spinning thing in his butt."

Ukitake and Kyouraku blinked. Starrk smacked Lilynette at the back of her head, groaning into a hand.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For what you said!"

"You're the one who is using the metaphor! I'm just adding onto it!" she whined.

"Quiet," Starrk growled. "Do you want to take over explaining?"

"No," she pouted, but he ignored her.

The Captains were laughing. Starrk blinked at them, cocking his head to the side. Were they laughing because of the two of them? If they were… he ducked his head to hide the smile tugging at the sides of his mouth. It felt nice, to have people laughing at what he and Lilynette said.

Laughter – real, mirthful laughter without any mockery – was so rare in Las Noches. And before that, Starrk had only ever heard Lilynette laugh.

"Sorry, sorry," Ukitake chuckled. "It's just… well, we've never thought of it that way, certainly!"

"It's a rather hilarious image, to be sure," Kyouraku added. "But please, continue."

Starrk peered at them through his hair before he nodded. "Okay, so… all Arrancar have a thing called pesquisa," he said. "It's what we use to find people and figure out their power levels. We basically… send out a pulse of energy, and wait for it to bounce back."

He looked at Lilynette; this was her part.

"My pesquisa is completely awesome," she chirped. "If I really concentrate, I can actually see reiatsu and its threads. Most of the others, even Starrk here," she elbowed him in the ribs, "can only sense it, like… I don't know, light when you close your eyes? But I can see it really clearly!"

"Stop bragging," Starrk protested half-heartedly. Then he picked up the explanatory thread again before she could protest.

"So we could see the spider's web, because Lilynette could see it. And all we need to do after that was pretty simple: we broke the web completely by punching at each individual thread with raw power until the whole things collapsed."

Lilynette spread out her hands. "Boom! The Complete Hypnosis is now Broken Hypnosis!"

The Captains exchanged a loaded look. Starrk shifted slightly, feeling uncomfortable as the silence dragged on.

"Starrk-san…" Kyouraku said eventually. "If you could do that, then why didn't you break my shikai?"

Because I didn't want to kill you.

"You weren't listening again!" Lilynette complained. She took her wakizashi and smacked the Shinigami hard on the head while Starrk stared in horror, all of his words immediately swallowed. "I'm the one who can see it, and I was stuck in the guns and the wolves!"

"We can only do it in that form," Starrk added quickly, grabbing Lilynette and stopping her from jumping out of the bed to smack Ukitake. "And we're never going back to that form again."

"Ow," Kyouraku said mildly, rubbing at his head where the sword had landed. "You're so violent, Lilynette-chan."

"I'll show you violent!" she threatened, trying to struggle out of Starrk's grip. "Then maybe you would listen to us properly!"

"Lilynette! Stop hitting people!"

"Well," Ukitake spoke up suddenly, his voice interrupting Lilynette's incoming tirade. "I don't think there will be a need for the two of you to go back to that form again, Starrk-san, Lilynette-chan."

Starrk didn't bother to hide the relief on his face. "Good," he said quietly. Beside him, Lilynette calmed down, immediately clinging to his side.

Neither of them ever wanted to be alone again. Even if they could hear each other in their minds, it wasn't the same as being able to hear each other's voices, to feel each other's warmth. Even if everything ended up with the two of them alone in Hueco Mundo again, they would at least be together.

There wouldn't be complete silence again.

"You can stay here, you know," Ukitake said. Starrk stared at him, startled, and Ukitake's smile was soft and kind. It was almost like Aizen's, but so much more sincere.

"That is, only if you want to."

Somehow, Starrk suspected that he was talking less about staying here, in this room, than here, in Soul Society. He swallowed, not knowing what to think about that.

"Okay," he said finally.

"He's just too lazy to walk back," Lilynette declared. But she wasn't kicking him to move either.

Starrk slumped onto the bed, letting out a long breath. His body still hurt, but it was a nagging thing at the back of his mind.

"Sleep well, Starrk-san," Kyouraku said.

"You should take your kimono back," Starrk said, looking up at the other man.

Kyouraku laughed.

"I think that I'll keep it here a little longer," he grinned. "Eventually you'll realise that pink is really your colour."

"Your jokes are getting really old, taichou-san."

tbc

Notes: I have several things planned for this… series that I want to explore. It's actually a huge AU in my head starting from the end of the Fake Karakura Town Arc all the way to the Thousand Years of Blood War Arc. The idea that started it off was 'how much would things change if Starrk has survived and has been taken to Soul Society'? The answer was: 'quite a bit, but not as much as you might think'.

Some things I have planned: 1) Starrk and Lilynette figuring out their new swords, 2) Harribel's fate, as well as Grimmjow's and Nel's, 3) Starrk meeting Nanao, 4) Lilynette meeting Rukia, and 5) Aizen. This is not in chronological order or posting order; it's mostly just whenever I have the time/inspiration to write. Honestly, I'm not sure how many people are reading this right now, much less how many people are still in the fandom, so I'm just going to take my time.

Those who are reading, do review if there's anything that you would like to see in particular.