Happy New Year, everyone~!
Jesus fucking Christ what the hell?!
Luka knew! I should have seen the signs; the subtle advice, us being alone while she was sick...
But how? We hardly even see each other, once per week at most! And when we do Gumi is with her other Crypton friends.
But oho, no, she's a singer. She doesn't see, she hears.
She heard the way I talked about her, and Miku could have mentioned the way Gumi could have talked about me; I know that those two Crypton ladies are close friends as well.
But then what the fuck?! She decided to play cupid and set us up?!
Goddammit, it worked, too. I don't know what Gumi thinks of me but I'd be damned of an arrow isn't lodged in my brain, making me insane.
See things head-on, I said. I should have looked in the mirror; most signs came from myself! Of course she annoyed me at first. Of course the moment she looks even a tad bit alright I don't need a reason to be with her anymore. Of course I ask her out for shopping and agree to be silly with her. Of course I need to enslave myself for her health. Of course I have to become bloody addicted to her to such a point that she's fucking essential to my fucking happiness!
I'm loopy for her. I've been since day one.
I'd be damned; when I...care for someone it's in such a cool way that even I don't notice it at first. ...it explains the weird-ass dreams, though.
But no. I didn't think it would ever happen. Time and time again I've refused to date Mr. This or Mr. That. Time and time again I've remained unimpressed, unmoving, unemotional. I never thought I'd actually fall for someone. A younger someone. A Girl someone. A someone I used to hate.
This is so entirely unexpected that I have no idea how to tell her. I can't get on my knees and confess like some poor high school loon, but she deserves better than a 'Gurl, you fly, be my bae'. Urk.
No. I'll invite her somewhere this time and tell her with full words that I very suddenly realized that I'm...
...
in love..?
...
No, I won't say that. It's too...no.
I'll get her flowers or something.
She likes carrot cake.
That's a good idea.