Chapter Eight:

Closure

It was quiet in the room, almost too quiet. Rocket had been awake for a while, just thinking and listening. He was turned so he was lying there looking at the wall. At one point someone had opened the food hatch to put a tray of food in. Why hadn't Silas woke him up? Why hadn't she checked on him? Come to think of it, why was she so quiet? What if they'd come for her while he was asleep? All the answers were there, all he had to do was roll over and look. But why couldn't he? The answer to that was simple. He'd let his emotions show. Rocket Raccoon wasn't the type to do that kind of thing. What would she think of him? Weak, strong, or maybe she would just be confused at this emotional torrent. Maybe he should just face her and be honest. There was no doubt that she had questions, she deserved answers.

There was no more time to deliberate, he was going to have to face her before too long anyway. He rolled over on his back and sat up, his eyes went wide. Before him was Alicia. Her lithe bare back was to him, he couldn't see her face, but he knew it was her. It was almost as if could smell her. Her beautiful golden fur was short and sleek, from the back of her head down her long neck all the way to the tip of her long tail. At first the only thing he could do was close his eyes tightly and open them again. She was still standing there, she was cradling something in her hand, but he couldn't see what it was.

He swallowed hard and whispered her name. "Alicia."

The figure that bared the resemblance of his love jolted from the sound of hearing his voice. Slowly she turned around, her green eyes piercing into him. Rocket's eyes traced down her naked form, he'd not seen it in years. It was exactly as he'd remembered it. There was another pain deep inside of him now. A want to run to her, hold her in his arms. Only logic kept him from doing it. She was dead and he knew it. They looked at each other for a long moment before Rocket got up and walked towards her. He'd noticed that she had the recorder clutched in her hand.

"I know this may be a dream, or maybe I've died and gone to whatever afterlife I'm heading for. But I just want to say, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry about how I reacted to you doing what you thought was right. I'm sorry that I left without talking to you first. But most of all I'm sorry that I never picked up when you tried to get a hold of me. I don't have an excuse for how I reacted, and I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness. I just want you to know that I wish I could have done things differently." Rocket moved to stand in front of her, she was still taller than him, something that would have pissed him off when he was younger, but now he was just overwhelmed with happiness to be with her.

"Rocket, it's Silas. Alicia was so beautiful that I wanted to know what it was like to be her. What it was like to be loved so strongly by someone so wonderful as you." She whispered, even managing Alicia's voice masterfully. "You weren't suppose to see me like this, I was going to turn back long before you woke up. Please don't be mad at me, I'm sorry."

While she spoke, her jaw clutched tightly, slowly her form melted back into her normal form. Rocket could see the reflection quivering in her large eyes, and knew that the guilt must have been eating at her. She crouched down and picked up her fatigue top slipping it over her head to cover her naked form. Rocket hesitated for a long second before he took her hand and squeezed it.

"Please don't worry about it. I'm not angry at all. If anything I'm happy that you did this. In some strange way I was able to say sorry to her for what I did. Even though I know it won't change how she felt about me in the end. I think I might have found some form of closure...ick gods I sound so gay." Rocket shook his head in mock disgust and followed it up with a chuckle.

Silas suddenly smiled and lifted the recorder. "Wait that reminds me! I spent a long time studying the holo recording and I discovered something that will make you feel better. Whoever gave you the device tampered with the recorder. If the recorder is high quality, they sometimes have editing capabilities. With the right recording equipment you can alter the animation and even the voice recording."

"How do you know all this?" Rocket cocked his head, he'd already heard of that sort of things happening but never met anybody who could do it before.

"Duh, I told you I use to be a student at the Tech Academy before I was taken. It's actually child's play. I was able to uncover the original recording, whoever did it was stupid enough to play the doctored version right over top the original. After I isolated the old one, I was able to play it separately from the new one." Silas looked into Rocket's eyes, he was standing there with a vacant look on his face.

"Right perhaps I should just let you see the original recording." Silas cleared her throat and held out the device.

Rocket swallowed hard and ran his thumb over the device slowly. Silas reached up and light pushed the play button for him. The recording bathed Rocket's face in a pale blue light. Alicia was standing before him, much as she had been the last time he saw the recording. Everything was the same as it was before. Arty must have wanted it to appear as authentic as possible so he must have changed very little about the recording.

"This is Second Lieutenant Alicia Dagon of the U.S.F. Tesla. We were on route to intercept a Skrull Warbird. We've taken heavy damage, the core is over heating and on the verge of rupturing. I don't have long for this life. I just want to say, I love you father, Arty, and my family. Please don't grieve for me. Father if you get this, promise me that you'll find Rocket and tell him that I love him. No matter what I always loved him. I know he was hurting and reacted the only way he could. I just hope he finds happiness." Just then the hologram trembled hard and went black.

Rocket breathed in deeply and then out again. It was clear by the gleam in his brown eyes that he was stifling tears. Silas's soft hand caressed along Rocket's shoulders, her eyes never leaving his. It was a well known fact that Rocket was a masculine time, but what wasn't so widely known is he didn't talk about his feelings. Did everything he could to stifle his feels. But right now, in front of Silas his heart felt like a wound, opened and bare to her. Secretly he hated it and in a way hated her for being able to see it.

"Take all the time you need Rocket. In fact take the recorder, listen to it as many times as you need to. All that matters is that you feel better." Silas handed him the recorder and kissed his brow, the fur on his forehead was soft and tickled her face.

"I could never thank you enough for what you've done Silas...I wish I could say something that truly expressed what I was feeling, but I'm just not that good with words." Rocket leaned into her as if he needed her help to stay on his feet.

"You don't have to say anything, it was my pleasure. I'd do anything for you Rocket." Silas said quietly, giving him a smile.

Rocket touched her cheek, petting it tenderly. He leaned in close and pressed his dark lips to her's in a gentle kiss. A surprised noise slipped out of her mouth at the kiss, but she didn't pull away. There lips parted just slightly to deepen the kiss. Silas swoon and threatened to tip forward, he wrapped his arms around her neck and held her tight, helping her stand. A warm feeling pushed its way to Silas's face. Her heart was racing in her chest and a tremble was working its way from the tip of her tail to the rest of her body. Her fingers finding his, bringing them lower along her body. She directed his hand to fondle her through the light fabric of her fatigue shirt. The soft scales along her body gave way slightly to his touch. He could feel her heart pounding through her skin. Rocket let out a soft moan into her mouth. He wanted this, he wanted her. She'd given him something so special. Alicia was his soul mate and this was the closest he'd come to being with her in so long. It was at that point that he opened his eyes. Slowly he pulled away from the kiss and the embrace. His eyes finding hers through the haze of his mind.

"I'm sorry, I can't do this..." Rocket took her hand and held it. "I'm just not ready. I need time to deal with how I'm feeling. It's not fair to you for us to do this."

Silas bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes relaxing a bit, trying to calm her pounding heart. Slowly she changed her form taking up the guise of the familiar form that Rocket knew all too well. Her shoulders narrowing, her neck lengthening. The face forming to Alicia's. Her eyes, the same piercing power behind them. She pulled her shirt up and off leaving her exposed to Rocket's gaze. Rocket could feel himself growing weak, he swallowed hard and blinked at her.

"I want you Rocket. If you'd feel more comfortable we can do while I look like this. I don't care, I'm not as pretty as her..." Rocket shook his head and touched her lips.

"You are pretty, you're very beautiful. You don't have to be her to entice me. Alicia is from my past. Someone I cared about deeply, and my always have a soft spot of. But she's dead, I can never have her again. You may be my future, I don't want to mess it up like I did with Alicia. I need time to process everything that's happening inside so that if anything were to develop between us, I can be the best raccoon I can be. I hope you understand." Rocket said softly, his fingers moving from her lips to along the fur on her cheek.

Silas nodded slowly and smiled. "I understand..." Silas closed her eyes tightly flexing a little and shifted back into herself.

Rocket knelt down and picked up her shirt, helping her to cover up. "Thank you for everything, I'm not use to dealing with my emotions as you may have noticed. When I get all weepy like this, I usually just get angry and start killing people."

Silas giggled and nodded slowly. "Well since I'm the only one in here with you, lets try to avoid that. Shall we?"

Rocket chuckled and walked over to pick up his tray of cold food. It looked terrible, but since he'd slept through lunch he was starving. Silas sat down on the cot hugging her body. Her whole body quaking from excitement. It was evident by her heavy breathing that Rocket had struck a nerve. A smile crept across his lips. It made him good inside that he could make her feel that way. Maybe being open about his emotions wasn't so bad. Besides that, it didn't make him soft or a Nancy boy. But one thing he was sure of, it made things a whole lot more complicated. When he looked at her and saw the beautiful smile on her lips, it made it seem all the more worth it.

Rocket looked up from his food, I was almost already gone, he'd been more hungry than he thought. "What are you smiling about? If it's a joke, let me in on it. I need a good laugh."

"Sorry I don't know very many jokes. I was just wondering something. I know you said you were going to sleep on the floor tonight. Is there anyway I could convince you otherwise. I just need you to hold me tonight." Silas stretched her legs, looking down at her webbed toes.

Rocket put down the tray next to the door and walked over to her. "I'd be honored to."

Silas's cheeks flushed red and she shivered. Loud enough for his keen ears to pick up. It must have been something he said, or maybe it was the way he said it. His ego chimed in. She took his hand and pulled him towards the bed, lying down.

"It's still early I think." Rocket chuckled as he lay next to her on the cot.

They lay face to face on the bunk and she manipulated the blanket over the. "I don't care, I'm really tired from all the shape shifting I did. Not to mention my...body is going a little crazy. I just need to rest."

Rocket kissed her lips softly and nodded. "Shh, you rest as much as you want to."

Silas yawned widely and stretched hard, a deep grown escaping from inside of her. He could tell that she was tried, by how heavy her eyelids were. It also was very apparent that she was fighting sleep by her playful slapping at his side. Rocket couldn't help but smile at how cute she was being. But fun was fun and now it was time for her to get some rest. Rocket reached up and caressed the top of her head along the spine there. He hummed a soft song that Peter Quill had played from his mix tape. Rocket couldn't help but smile at how smooth the scales were against his finger pads. Silas closed her eyes and trembled. He could tell by the tremble running through the cot that his touch had an effect on her. What he was hoping to do was lull her to sleep.

"Sleep well kid." Rocket whispered and went back to humming the tune, as he was hoping he watched as her eyes fluttered closed and he knew she was asleep.