ALEX
I was glad Eric trusted me enough to tell me how lost he felt without his dad. I still wondered though, how his dad passed away. There were still so many things unanswered about him, that I felt like I needed to know. For example, the only thing I knew about his mom was that he said 'she was important'. I was starting to really like Eric, and even decided that I would tell him one day. One day when I could completely trust him too.
After PE, Lauren came to grab me.
"So are you really going to try out for volleyball?"
"I was planning on doing so."
"Great," she said and motioned for me to follow her. We walked behind the gym instructor's office, went through another door, and down a hallway. I didn't think the locker room was this big. At the end, we came to another door. Instead of knocking, she just walked straight in.
"This is Coach Tori," she said motioning to a slender, athletic, and very pretty woman.
"You must be Alex," Coach Tori said standing up and holding out her hand for me to shake.
"I am. It's very nice to meet you."
"Coach Tori is in charge of all the girl's sports teams," explained Lauren.
"Except cheer of course," Coach Tori said answering my unasked question. "I leave that up to Sharon. She was cheer captain when she went school here, so she can keep the squad up with all the traditions." Sharon was Principal Phifer's daughter. Something I didn't know until the second fight I got into with Rachel.
"I heard that you're interested in volleyball."
"Yes I am. I played a little at Amity. I wanted only to do sports this year, but got convinced otherwise."
Lauren turned and looked at Coach Tori. "She's roommates with Christina Kravitz." It seemed like that was all Lauren had to say and Coach Tori understood.
"Tryouts are tonight and tomorrow. I'll host another tryout on Monday, so as not to conflict with cheer and football. By next week Wednesday, we should know who's on the team." She handed me a form. "Fill this out and we'll see you tonight back here around 6."
"Thanks Coach Tori."
"You can just call me Tori." I nodded and me and Lauren left to get and get an early dinner.
I was really excited for volleyball. Finally I felt like I was going to be doing something worthwhile to me. I loved dancing and cheering, don't get me wrong, but I felt more free doing sports.
Tryouts were awesome. I was waiting almost all year, I guess you could say, to smack this ball across the court. Besides, Lauren, there were a couple other girls I met on the team. Some of them I had in classes and they were pretty cool. Others I just met, but they all seemed to know about Aidan Kent's sister or Eric Matthew's girlfriend, which I had to explain that we weren't going out. All of them wouldn't believe me, even Lauren. What made it even harder for me to prove my point was that after tryouts, Eric showed up to walk me back to my room.
I asked Eric to stay the night again. I mean Christina was still going to be at Will's and what was wrong with two friends hanging out? Again he walked over to Christina's bed. But this time he started to jump on top of it, kicking her pillows and teddy bears around.
"Really? This morning she made me put her sheets on all nice. I don't want to clean that up, too."
"Just leave before she shows up," Eric said.
I couldn't help but think that Aidan was probably going to be wondering too where Eric ran off to last night and tonight, but I didn't really care. Aidan had his secrets from me, too. That sparked a topic of conversation as Eric and I were laying down in bed.
He was laying down shirtless, of course, and I was resting on his chest.
"I know my brother tells you stuff," I started.
"What do you mean by stuff?"
"Christina, Marlene, Tris, and Shauna guys, they all said that my brother never talked about me. But now that I'm here, been here for like two months, I know I must have come up in conversation."
"Well, aren't we kind of arrogant to think everyone talks about them," he said teasingly. I tried to hit his stomach on the side, but he moved a bit, and it barely hit him. "Come on Alex, I think you can hit harder than that."
"What makes you an expert in hits?"
"I take some hits and dish more of it out on the field. I'm pretty sure I can gauge a good one and a bad one. And I know for a fact that that was not your best."
"Well, you moved," I tried to reason.
"See told you I was an expert," he said smiling. It was then that I realized what he just did.
"Hey!" I tried to his him again, and this time I stuck him in his abs. He gripped his side and started to chuckle. "You were trying to change the subject!"
"No I wasn't," he said laughing.
"Yes, you were." I stared at him and he tried to smirk at me. I sat up and just looked down at him trying so hard not to give in to his smile.
"Come here," Eric said trying to pull me down. I wiggled free.
"Not until you admit that you were trying to change the subject." I crossed my arms and tried to look upset, but it was so difficult with him smiling at me like that. I bit my lip so I wouldn't start laughing. He continued to smirk at me. Slowly I felt his fingers running up and down my thigh. I looked away. How in the world was his smile doing that to me?
"Come here, first," he began to bargain. "And then I'll tell you something about your brother."
I rolled my eyes and slowly laid back down, cuddling into his side. His hand started to rub my lower back, sometimes temptingly running under the waistband of my pajama shorts.
"I can't tell you," he said as I tried to move away again. It was of no use, because his grip tightened and I was pulled even closer to him. "Your brother made me promise not to say anything." My body started to relax. Obviously Aidan did tell him something, but Eric was too good of a friend, to just spill it out.
"Although, he did promise me that he would eventually talk to you about it." He pushed some of my hair out of my face and ran his hand along my cheek.
"Aidan feels really bad about what happened. And I don't know if you remember or not, but it's always stuck out in his mind. Guilt has sort of kept him up at night sometimes. I think that's why he didn't mention you all those other years or why he's tried to distance himself. He's afraid he might do it again, I guess. Know this though, that Aidan loves you dearly, Alex. He never wants to see hurt. Watching over you earlier this year wasn't just him being overly protective or sheltering. He feels he has the past couple years to make up for. To show you that he truly cares about you."
"I know he does. We were so close growing up. We were going to stick by each other through thick and thin. Then we came up to high school and I just don't know what happened."
"Alex, you should talk to your brother. Just you and him. I told him that he needed to talk to you, because no one should keep that bottled up. Trust me, I know. And besides I think that you both need it."
The next day, volleyball tryouts were done rather quickly. I ran out of the gym to see some of the guys were only now leaving football practice also. I scanned through the group to see if I could spot Aidan.
"Looking for Eric," someone asked. I turned to see Peter, Drew, Al, and Edward.
"No, for your information, I'm looking for Aidan."
"Sure you are, Kent," teased Peter as he, Drew, and Al left.
"He's still inside talking to Coach," said Edward.
"Thanks, Edward," I said and sat down on a bench that was outside the locker room.
"You need company," he said sitting next to me. I smiled and nodded. Things were a little awkward after the whole make out situation. At the game this past weekend, I told him that Christina was determined on getting me my first kiss, and he told me that it was his too, which didn't make things any better. What did though was that when I admitted that I wished it was with someone else, he said the exact same thing. We both agreed that we were still friends.
Edward and I talked about all sorts of stuff again. Classes, college, and surprisingly cars. And then he told me a story about when Four, Zeke, my brother and he flooded their bathroom in the dorm building room freshman year. That's how Zeke and Shauna met. Her room was right below theirs and water ended up leaking on her. She was furious, marched right upstairs, and was about to give Zeke a piece of her mind. But eventually they ended up dating.
We were both laughing when he was finally done telling the story. At the same time, Four, Eric, Zeke, Uriah, and Aidan came walking out of the locker rooms.
I didn't realize how close Edward and I were sitting until I saw Eric's face. Eric did not look too pleased to find me and Edward sitting together. It almost felt like there was hurt and anger in his eyes. I couldn't help but feel a little guilty, just like that night we played truth and dare. Both Edward and I stood up rather quickly. I guess he must have sensed the glaring also.
"There's one of my favorite girls in the whole world," called Zeke throwing his arm around me. "I like truly missed seeing you these past couples days. I think I missed you the most," he finished pinching my cheek.
"Really, Zeke," I said pushing him away.
"Well, you're like somewhere on my top ten," he said still joking.
"You act so childish sometimes. I still don't understand how you flood a girl's room and she still ends up dating you," I said. Everyone started to laugh.
"You told her," Zeke accused Eric.
"No, I didn't," said Eric chuckling. "We don't talk about you."
"Well, what do you two talk about," said Uriah winking at me. "Inquiring minds want to know."
"Stuff that's really none of the inquiring mind's business," I defended and pushed Uriah as well.
"You know, Kent," started Uriah scratching his crotch. "I really hated that silly thong you made me wear. I don't understand how you girls can wear stuff like that."
"Well, that was actually Marlene's thong, so you can somewhat blame her, too. You're not still wearing it now, are you," I asked him trying not to laugh.
"Didn't you say all week?"
"I said all weekend. Monday morning you could have took it off!" Everyone started laughing again.
"Really? Was that the dare," questioned Uriah confused.
"Dude, you mean to tell me you had that on all week," asked Four while everyone started to laugh. Uriah looked away.
"I thought that was part of the dare," said Uriah looking embarrassed.
"Can we talk about something else besides the truth and dare game," said Eric quickly which stopped the laughter. The dare that Edward had was probably fresh in his mind.
"Actually I did need to come here to talk about something else," I said the last two words putting quotations in the air. "I was wondering if I could talk to you, Aidan?" Aidan looked a bit shocked and turned to look at Four and Eric.
"Don't look at me, she's your sister," said Four.
"See you later then Alex," called Edward and I waved bye to him and Zeke. Uriah was still standing there.
"Let's go, Uriah," called Four.
"I think I should stay," said Uriah. "To play referee." He didn't stay long though, Four came up and dragged him away. Eric came up to me and kissed my forehead. I smiled, knowing what he was trying to tell me.
"Thanks," I whispered to him before he left as well.
We waited a while, I think until we were sure that no one was around.
"Are you okay?" I turned to Aidan who looked scared. What did he think I wanted to talk to him about?
"I'm fine, Aidan. Nothing has happened with the other girls and the guys haven't really been messing with me."
"Is this about last weekend?" I looked at puzzled. "Mom and dad were kind of giving you rash for getting into the fight with Rachel."
"No, not really. Maybe I was a little hurt by that. Actually a lot, but I think I'm okay now." How was I going to tell him that Eric was actually the one who comforted me that night, including last night and the night before?
"Are we going to talk about the make out session you and Edward had?" I rolled my eyes. "Honestly, Alex, that was really uncomfortable for me. To see my little sister making out with one of the guys on my team."
"I'm sixteen, Aidan. I know I'm still young, but you do know that eventually that is going to happen." Although I wish it would have happened with someone else on his team.
"I know, but it's just a hard pill to swallow Alex. I don't even know if I'm okay with Eric and you." Now I was thoroughly confused. I know that the only people who knew about Eric sleeping over was Christina, Will, and Four. Well, Tris found out from Four and eventually I told Myra. But other than that none of our other friends knew.
"What are you talking about?" Please don't let him be talking about Eric sleeping over.
"Come on Alex. He's been helping you clean the classroom building bathrooms. I mean what guy helps a girl clean the bathrooms unless there's something going on between them? You two study and hang out together. Okay, so you have a project together in Psychology, so that explains going to the library. But honestly, Alex, I'm not blind. And I am a guy, I can see how he, and half of campus, look at you. And I see you looking back at him, too." Thank God it wasn't about him sleeping over.
"We're friends," I said looking down.
"Alex, I'm your brother, I think you can tell me anything. And by anything, perhaps we can start with where he's been sleeping the past two nights?" So he did have an idea about where Eric sleeping over.
"I'll tell you this, if you promise to answer at least five questions I have for you." He stepped a couple steps back and looked around. What was he so worried about? He turned back to me.
"Why don't we go to my room? Everyone is going to be down in the cafeteria, we can talk for a while up there." And to his room we went.
"Okay, so what's your first question," he said as I sat down on his bed and he pulled out a box of chocolate covered strawberries.
"Where did this come from," I practically screamed. "And no that wasn't my first question."
Aidan started to chuckle. "Well, if I answer, you'll definitely include it somewhere in your five questions." What was that supposed to mean? Wait, I thought. I looked at him and gave him my "begging" look that Eric said I always give to Aidan. He looked at me and shook his head.
"Fine, I'll let you have a freebie." I smiled and grabbed a strawberry from the box.
"It's from Cara Turner. She's a senior, like us, at Erudite Academy." Turner, I thought. Isn't that Will's last name?
"I asked her to send it over to me, since I knew you were feeling down about this past weekend." How did someone in Erudite, get Amity strawberries? "Cara's family has connections," he said answering my unasked question. I swear people were reading my mind.
"How did you two meet?" He looked at me. "I'll count that as one of my questions."
"One spring break I went back with Eric to stay with his folks. His dad is pretty awesome." Gee, I know that. "Eric's folks leave close by to Edward's, your friend Myra, and Will's family."
"So this Cara is Will's sister?" He immediately started to blush.
"Are you two dating?" He got up and went to grab a bottle of water from the fridge.
"Oh my god, you two are dating! Does Will know?" He turned to look at me, expression still blank. "Will doesn't know!" I practically screamed.
"Will you shut up already, before someone hears you."
"Oh everyone is down at the cafeteria," I said waving my hand in the air. "So," I said hoping he would continued.
He came back to sit on the bed and a smile appeared on his face. "No, we're not dating. But I really like her. She's really nice, Alex. Totally smart too. She has all these goals and plans for the future. She has a really good head on her shoulders. Only Edward and Eric know that I like her."
"Have you told her that you like her?"
"I wanted to, a couple times. But I'm just not so sure, she feels the same way. I rather not say anything. And yes, she is Will's sister, which makes this whole thing twice as hard. I mean how can I have a crush on one of my friend's sister?"
"I guess I know how that feels," I said this time rather sadly. And I wasn't even trying to sound sad. I truly was. He gave me a questioningly look. "First things first, you need to answer my questions."
"Okay, but let me just remind you, I think you're down to like two." We both started to laugh.
"I guess Christina is starting to rub off on me," I said once we finally stopped laughing.
Aidan smiled. "I'm glad you made so much friends here, Alex."
"I wouldn't have made as much as I did, if it weren't for you."
"Shut up. Everyone likes you. Every where you go, people flock to you."
"Aidan, honestly, I came here and was immediately labelled as Aidan Kent's sister. I've been here for two months and the girls on the volleyball team are still calling me your sister." Or Eric's girlfriend, I thought. "The only reason why they like me, is because the handsome, funny, charming Aidan Kent, quarterback of the football team who also happens to rock out on the guitar, just happens to be my brother."
He started to laugh again.
"I'm serious Aidan. Even the teachers are comparing me to you any chance they get. Hope you don't blow up anything in the lab, like your brother." I attempted to mimic my AP Physics teacher. "Don't copy anything from Aidan's work. He was my best student last year. Even the gym instructor pushes me harder, claiming that if Aidan can do it, then why can't his sister? It's pretty exhausting, Aidan."
"Well, that's pretty much how I felt my whole life," he said with a smile. Although I couldn't help but think that he was dead serious.
"Fourth question," I said making it sound urgent. "Were you jealous of me growing up?"
He was quiet for a while. Finally he closed his eyes and nodded. "Yes, Alex, I was." I had heard of siblings going through this sort of thing, but I never thought it was that way with Aidan and I.
"Aidan," I said as I put my hand on his shoulder. Immediately he stood up and started to pace.
"Everyone liked you. And I mean everyone. The neighborhood kids, they only came to our house to play with you. If you were sick, a lot of them didn't want to come to hang out with me. You always got first place. Literally. That track and field meet back in sixth grade. You won first place, three times. I came in either second or third."
"I do remember you winning first place that day, too."
"That was because you weren't in that race." He stopped to stand in front of me and crossed his arms, letting that sink in, then continued to pace. "The day I got a student of the month award, you ended up getting student of the year. If I got an honor roll, you would get principal's list. If you were sick, mom would make you cookies and sherbert. You were catered to. In fact, you could ask dad for anything and he'd give it to you. He was mad with you this past weekend, yet you still got to take home three different pies. I just got a hug for tying his record," he finished talking the same time he stopped pacing.
"Mom and Dad are always proud of you, Aidan. You don't hear how much they talk about you to the family, their friends, all of dad's workmates. They're always bragging about you. I just keep disappointing them."
"But the disappointment never lives long, Alex. It's like no matter how much I do, it never compares to you."
"Why didn't you ever say anything, Aidan? You always seemed happy for me whenever I won something."
"I couldn't help it. Like I said, you just have this magnetism quality about you. You just draw people to you. Besides, you're my sister and I am really happy for you. It was wrong for me to feel jealous, so I tried my best to hide it."
"All those years, Aidan and you never told me. I thought we could tell each other anything? Here I was thinking that I was always going to be living in your shadow, trying to live up to your reputation."
"Don't get me wrong Alex. I love that you're here. You seem to make me more determined, driven, and even complete. It's like a piece of home is here with me, because you're with me. But at the same time, the feelings of regret, shame, and even failure come to me when I see you."
"What do you mean?" He looked away. "You're ashamed of me?" He looked back and shook his head that he wasn't.
"I'm ashamed of something that I did to you."
"Aidan, you always treated me like I was a princess. I don't understand."
"You really don't remember?" I shook my head that I didn't. "At Navy Pier prep, everyone loved you. A guy befriended me, just to get to you and I couldn't take it. It was like all those years that I was put second place or on the back burner did catch up to me. When we left Navy Pier, it was like a miracle for me. Quite honestly I was glad that I got sent somewhere where I could be my own person, make my own friends, be in first place for once."
He came down to sit next to me on the bed.
"You don't remember one of the arguments we got into freshmen year?"
"We got into a few."
He took a deep breath. It was quiet for probably a minute, but it felt like an eternity.
"I'm talking about the one that I ended up slapping you," he stated looking away from me.
It all came back to me now. That day that he did, it was like I died. I never thought of my brother coming in second place to me. I always looked at it as I was trying to live up to him and his accomplishments. That I was always chasing after him. I looked up to him, thought he was the best brother in the world. Like everything that he did was awesome. I cherished my brother like he was some sort of super hero. But that moment that his hand reached back and slapped me across the face, it was like a bus ran through me. It was like he didn't love me at all. Like our family bond was only one sided and that I had been living in a dream that Aidan and I were inseparable.
"Aidan," I said softly trying to hold back my tears. The second that he turned to me, they started to pour out of me.
"Alex," he started. I threw my hands up to my face trying to stop the tears, but they kept pouring. "I already said I was sorry and you already said you forgave me, but I couldn't help but still feel guilty. Despite what I felt, I shouldn't have done that. It was stupid. Your my younger sister, I'm supposed to protect you, be the strong one for you, and yet, I was selfish."
My hands were trembling against my face, it was like I could still feel the sting of the slap. The slap that happened almost three years ago.
"Alex," Aidan stated gently taking my hands away from my face. My body was starting to shake and the tears were making my vision blurry. Yet, I could still tell that Aidan was thoroughly frustrated about what he had done. It definitely had been eating away at him these past couple years.
"I love you. Not just because you're my sister. But because of the type of person that you are. I'm proud of all the things that you do, I really am, Alex. I truly care about you and really can't stand to see you hurt. There's no words that I can say that will erase that day. But I swear to God, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, showing you that I love you, that I'm truly sorry for acting like a idiot, when I should have been a true brother." He was starting to cry also, I threw myself into his arms and continued to cry soaking up shirt.
"It's going to be a little hard to bring back that brother that you grew up with," Aidan said stroking my hair. "But I will do everything in my power to make sure that brother you saw that day when we got into the argument, never, NEVER," he said pulling me away to look at me. "I mean NEVER comes back."