Chapter 18: Folly

Alfred was in a better mood contrast to the day prior. It showed in his smile when he greeted Toris at his door.

"Oh, Alfred, you're early!"

"Ha ha, don't look so surprised Tor!"

"Erm it's just, well it's not even noon yet so—"

"That's 'cause we're going out to eat!"

"Uh, we…are?"

"Yeah! You didn't think we'd just go see a movie and that's that, didja?"

"H-Honestly I'm not sure what I expected!"

"A friend-date, that's what you should be expecting!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming! Geez!" Feliks huffed and opened his front door, irritation in his face draining away when he saw a familiar Japanese boy standing there. "Kiku? I was totally not expecting you to visit. Like ever."

"Apologies Feliks-kun, but there is an urgent matter that I must uhm…discuss with you."

"Sure thing buddy. Come on in!" He led him through the door, locking it behind him. "Parents are out for the day, so don't worry about running into them or anything. My room's this way."

Feliks opened his bedroom door and flopped down on his bed. Kiku was flabbergasted, taking in the rather extensive horse collection he'd ever seen in his entire life. Honestly, I don't know what I was expecting…

He heard the other laugh. "Yeah, you're not the first person to have that face. Lotsa people who visit for the first time are always like, so shocked at all these horses. But come on, they're only my most favorite animal ever. Why wouldn't I wanna collect horse things?"

"That is a good question that I'm positive only you will be able to answer, Feliks-kun."

"Well come on, what's the gossip?" He patted the spot on the bed next to him.

"Uh, it is not gossip. It's an urgent matter."

"Shouldn't you go to somebody like, say Al, for this? He's your best friend."

"I cannot go to him because…he cannot help me with this…matter. Besides, today he is spending most of the day with Toris-san."

"Oh yeah, Tor has a date with him today."

"It is not a date!"

"Okay okay!" He held up his hands in defense. "An outing, hanging out, whatever you wanna call it! Geez, don't bite my head off."

"I apologize…"

Feliks crossed his arms and stared hard at Kiku, cocking his head to the side a bit. He rubbed his chin, and as if a light bulb went off, he grinned. "Ooooh, yeah. Okay, I see."

"…?"

"The matter is Alfred, isn't it?"

"W-Well technically it—"

"Ah ha ha, you've got a crush on him, dontcha?" Feliks giggled as Kiku's face turned rosy. He swung his legs back and forth at the edge of the bed. "You don't have to say it. I already know." Before the other could even open his mouth to retort, the Polish boy continued. "You make it too obvious."

"Wh-What?! I haven't told anyone about it aside from you and I'm very careful to avoid suspicion of any kind!"

"Tsk tsk. And yet, how is it that I already knew, huh?"

"Perhaps you are just keen at these things!"

"Or perhaps, I have my own little gossip circle—"

"Gossip circle?!"

"—but…! I won't be giving away names."

"Why…are you talking about me behind my back?"

"Oh it's nothing bad, don't worry! It's just, said persons in my gossip circle happen to notice you pay almost zero attention to Herc now, and like, a thousand attention to Al. But don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

"And your gossip circle I'm assuming…" Kiku sighed heavily.

"Relax, just because we gossip, doesn't mean we tell all that stuff to people outside the circle! Otherwise we'd have to kick that person out!"

"How many of your members are even in there?"

"That's classified in-for-ma-tion. All I'll say is that you know them all and you can trust us to not spill the beans."

"Perhaps I should go…"

"No! Kiku, I promise, super promise, mega promise, ultra promise that nothing bad will happen if I tell this to these specific persons! And you're my friend, so if you need help with something I'll like, totally help you out however I can! That's what Tor would want me to do!"

He glared at Feliks who was clasping his hands together in earnest, a pleading look upon his face. Deciding to take the risk, Kiku sat down next to him, sighing again. "Very well. I mean, I don't know who else to go to for this really so…"

Feliks chuckled and hugged him. "What are friends for? So! What's the matter?"

"Ehm…well I feel rather…stupid, for feeling this way."

"Oh come on, Al's like a really hot guy, among other things. It's not a surprise that alotta people wanna bang him—"

"E-Excuse me?!"

"Yeah, bang him as in—"

"I know what that means! But for you to insinuate that I'd want to do something like that with Alfred-san…!" Kiku was feeling overheated, touching his cheeks with his hands. Feliks chuckled again.

"I gotcha, I gotcha! That's not something that's on your mind right now, is it? Oh Kiku, you're so cute."

"Yes I have been told that many times."

"Sorry for getting off topic. Go ahead."

"Uhm…well, what I was going to say is…I don't…f-feel stupid for loving him per se—"

Feliks gasped. "Love? I thought this was a crush!"

"It has…evolved beyond that point."

"Oh, no no. Then I can't say anything to the others." He zipped his lips.

"Uhm…"

"See, we gossip about things that, if they like, ever do go out of the circle, the results would be harmless. But Kiku, if you're talking love, like the actual love where your heart just like swells with warmth and affection for him—"

"Y-Yes…"

"—then I can't say anything! There are rules all of us have to keep!"

"Uh…well okay, I suppose."

"And since we're speaking about love, the results would be disastrous if word ever got out you're in love with Al! Because like, a crush is one thing, it'll pass if that happens, but love? We're talking about the kind of love like ''til death do us part' and that's really something else entirely! And you'll be devastated because love is like the strongest emotion ever and I don't want you to get depressed!"

Kiku was stunned into dead silence.

"Oh, I interrupted again. Sorry."

"I…Feliks-kun, you are jumping the gun here. I do not intend to marry Alfred-san, or…s-s-sl—well, you know."

"Like ever?"

"…I will answer that at a later time. A friendly reminder that I'm merely seventeen years old and to be thinking that far ahead…well, I haven't inserted those…fantasies, into my future plans."

"Yeah, you're right. Well, anyway, continue! I'm just going to say 'sorry' in advance for any other interruptions."

"…that's fine, uh… Well, to further explain, I uhm…well, becoming aware that I am in love with Alfred-san, there are many conflicts, and I am at my wits' end."

"What do you mean?"

"For one, I know his preference is with females, and he only sees me as a friend, his very best friend. And…the most troublesome part is dealing with all these feelings of jealousy, like today. I mean, I know he has other friends but the way he spoke of Toris-san yesterday with such affection made me…angry."

"Oh Kiku."

"But I shouldn't be jealous because Toris-san is a good person and Alfred-san has the right to hang out with whoever he wants! I am not his wife!"

"Hee hee, that's cute. You consider yourself like a wife."

"Th-That was not what I meant, merely a slip of the tongue."

"Freudian slip!"

"Wh-Whatever. But anyway, I hate that I have these feelings and I try my best to not get too close to him, or…well, close in that I think I have the authority to dictate his life because I really love being so close to him and I couldn't have asked for a better best friend. Feliks-kun, I am distraught and I don't know what to do. I don't want to smother him with my affection because then he will be repelled and maybe even catch on that I love him and that wouldn't be good for either side…"

Feliks stared at Kiku who looked so crestfallen that the Polish boy believed he might even cry. He could have sworn those were the beginning of tears threatening to fall from the corners of his eyes.

"Kiks."

"Kiks?" Is that what he's going to call me now...?

"You shouldn't worry about Tor. He likes Nat, remember? And as far as I know, because I have intel everywhere to keep me on top of things, nobody else that Al talks with regularly, aside from your cousin, likes him that way." He pet his head. "So don't get all sad, okay? And, I know just how to prove it to you!"

"You do?"

"Yup!"

Kiku didn't know why he even bothered asking anybody for help with his romantic troubles when he was sure it'd end up in a train wreck. Especially Feliks. This was a bad idea.

"This is not what I was expecting when you said you'd be able to prove it to me."

"Well how else are we gonna know? Besides, these disguises are like, flawless."

"You look exactly the same."

"Uh, hello? The wig? I'm a redhead now. Hmm, Kiks, you're totally rocking that outfit."

"I'm a male dressed in feminine clothing."

"And you look so pretty in them too! Besides, with that wig, nobody will be able to tell that's you. Just…try not to talk so much, and if you do, change your pitch. Otherwise our plan goes right down the drain."

Sighing heavily, Kiku followed Feliks into the mall. He'll admit that Feliks looked pretty good in women's clothing, but Kiku wasn't very comfortable in them himself. He stuck close by to his friend (a term he used loosely now with this boy) so as not to wander off in case a situation occurred. He had no choice but to opt for the long black wig Feliks had in stock, as wearing a short one would have made it easier to recognize him.

"Hey Kiks, I think those guys over there think you're cute. They're totally checking you out."

"Can we please just get to the movie theater?"

"Pssh, okay, okay… God. Sorry for doing such a good job at making you attractive."

"The only thing I will thank you for is allowing me to continue to wear my boxers. Otherwise, you and I would have had a serious problem, Feliks-kun."

Kiku halted when he saw Alfred and Toris in the line, chatting away merrily. Feliks allowed for more people to get in front of them so as not to attract attention. After they were sure the other two already bought their tickets and went inside, Feliks bought their own and walked into the theater.

Heart racing and palms sweating, Kiku walked up to the concession line.

"Hey, I'm gonna go scope out some seats so we're not too close to them, okay? Somewhere in the back. Tor already walked to get some I'm assuming."

"B-But—"

"Don't worry. As long as you don't talk to him, Al probably won't know it's you."

"Probably?"

"Probably. Yeah. I bought the tickets, so you grab the snacks." He bounced off to reserve them seats.

Absentmindedly, Kiku walked into the line, trembling slightly. He looked down, thinking very hard about what he was doing. Surely, he was going to feel like a fool tomorrow. Only one person in front of him until his turn. His eyes widened when he heard the familiar friendly voice order.

"—and two hotdogs, a cinnamon pretzel, a regular pretzel, some chicken fingers—"

Alfred-san…! Only he would order that many snacks for one simple movie! Kiku's face flushed again, swallowing hard and trying to make himself as small as possible.

"—and I'll take some candy too."

"Woah there Al."

"Hey c'mon, you know I always order this much on my days off."

"Yeah but you should leave some for the other patrons!"

"Laugh it up all you want George, but my metabolism is good to me and I work out, so there!" He stuck out his tongue.

"You're such a kid."

"I'm not gonna deny it!"

Alfred reached over to grab some candy, Kiku making sure he was clear out of the way. When he finished ordering, he moved to the side until he got all of his snacks and confectionaries.

"What can I get for you miss?" the clerk asked.

"Uh u-uhm…" Kiku attempted to mask his voice. "A large…popcorn…and uhm…" He hurriedly grabbed whatever candy was closest to him. "These…"

"Is that all?"

"Yes…"

He rummaged through his wallet to get out some money. Alfred eyed him with curiosity. "Hey?"

"Y-Yes…?"

"Do I…know you?"

Shit. "I don't think so? I haven't ever seen you around…"

"Oh, wait, now I know why!"

Kiku tensed up.

"That wallet is the same one my friend has!"

"Ah, is that so?"

"Yeah!"

"I see. What a coincidence ah h-ha."

Grabbing his box of snacks, Kiku began to powerwalk away. Alfred followed. "Hey why're you walking so fast?!"

"I uhm, don't want to have a good seat taken."

"Aww, yeah I understand." Kiku could see from the corner of his eyes that Alfred continued to glance at him as they got napkins and straws.

"Is something the matter?"

"Ah n-no it's just…! Well you're really cute." He rubbed the back of his neck, a blush beginning to form on his face.

"Uh uhm…"

"Hey look I'm not trying to hit on you or anything! Just…a compliment. And…well you really do remind me of my friend. He's really cute too. That's one of the things I like best about him."

Kiku's face flared up. "Y-Your friend…? You think he's c-cute?"

"That…that sounds weird huh? 'Cause he's a guy…but…but no! Y'know what, I shouldn't be afraid to think other guys are attractive! I mean, girls can think other girls are attractive, right? So…yeah!"

"That is not what…"

"Ha ha, you probably think I'm sorta weird or like…dorky…"

"I uhm…well, dorky is nice."

"Eh?"

"Dorky. It is cute… And you too…! You are also…a very cute person."

The color in Alfred's face darkened, but he smiled instead of shying away. "Thanks!"

Walking together, they made their way to their own seats, saying goodbye. Feliks raised an eyebrow as Kiku approached him with a smile. "Here are your snacks, Feliks-kun."

"Saw you talking to Al."

"I tried not to say much. And he's the one who spoke to me first."

"You gotta tell me what happened."

"I'd rather not."

Toris put away his phone when Alfred plopped down right next to him. He gasped when he saw the box overflowing with food. "Alfred! We just ate lunch!"

"Yeah but these are snacks! Here's your stuff!"

"My goodness…" He huffed, followed up by a chuckle. "So who was that girl you were speaking with?"

"Dunno. I didn't ask her name."

"She seemed interested in you."

"Ah ha, really? Well even if she was…I don't think I am."

"Oh? Is it because of Navah?"

"Er, sorta. Kinda in the transition phase of getting over her, y'know?"

"Hmm, yes I know. Oh, the movie is going to start!"

Alfred couldn't focus on the movie for the first half hour. He mostly stared at the screen mindlessly, eating his food as he tried to make sense of his thoughts. I feel like getting over Navah might not be the only thing transitioning…

Kiku was glad to be out of Feliks's house. He politely handed back the clothes and said that if he made Kiku ever do something so dangerous like that again, the next topic of gossip will be how his entire horse collection ended up incinerated by a flamethrower.

"Life's full of mistakes, and asking Feliks-kun for advice about Alfred-san was one of the biggest follies I've ever made… But at least I learned from it. Now to get home before he does. Oh, but first, a stop at the supermarket. We need some groceries for dinner."

He had a lot of time to think on the bus, cradling the bags of food in his arms. Well, the only thing gained from this experience is that it was rather boring. How stupid I've become. What am I, a preteen girl in a soap opera? Nothing happened between them because they're friends, and that's where their relationship will stay. He sighed. I'm making myself paranoid, which I shouldn't, considering Alfred-san could never feel that way about me… Oh well… Perhaps it's better this way. I'm not life partner material for anybody… As long as Alfred-san can find somebody who loves him as much as I do, I'll be happy for the most part.

Kiku attempted to disregard his negative thoughts to prevent himself from falling into a gloomy mood. When he opened the door, he was greeted by Alfred, who was sitting on the couch, the home screen of one of their consoles waiting on the television.

"Welcome home buddy!"

"Alfred-san?"

"I didn't think you'd go out today."

"I got bored being in the house. And I need to go buy some groceries for tonight's dinner." He lifted the bags slightly as evidence. "All in all, it was a fairly…busy day. How was your outing with Toris-san?"

"Good! I kinda didn't pay much attention to the movie."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Had alotta things on my mind."

"Well, if you ever wish to talk about something, I'm here for you."

"Thanks. I know I can always count on you. That's what makes you such a good friend."

"Ah th-thank you. Uhm…so…" He pointed to the console. "You're going to play video games now?"

"Kiku, did you forget our gaming night?"

"Eh…? O-Oh, that's right! I'm sorry…"

"Don't worry about it! Happens to everybody. You don't have to make dinner for another two hours or so, right? We'll play until then."

"Oh, okay."

Putting away the groceries, Kiku sat down on the couch next to Alfred who handed him a controller. "You choose what game we play! We gotta get in as much gaming time as possible before school starts up again! We only have the rest of July, then August, and before you know it, September!"

"Alright…how about…this one?"

"Man, Kiku, you know that all friendships between anybody are void in Mario Party games, right?"

He chuckled. "Yes, I know."

"Good! Just didn't want to make you sad or anything when I win."

"You couldn't ever make me sad when playing against you Alfred-san. Everybody knows you always lose against me." He smiled sweetly at him.

"Ooooh, them's fightin' words! Alright, just for that, I'm gonna kick your ass in this game!"

"That is what you always say and yet you come in at second place."

"Not today! No way Jose! And just to make things interesting, whoever loses has to wash tonight's dishes! You game?"

"But of course."

Kiku figured that, even though his romantic endeavors would be all for naught, at least he had Alfred as a best friend, because their current relationship was more than he could ever ask for. To have somebody who genuinely cares about you and does nothing but lift you up, well, he figured he was already getting a good deal in life. As Alfred shot up from his seat and screamed at the television as he lost again, Kiku laughed. He decided to drop the hope for something more, and just be content with what he already has, knowing the taller boy could never love him mutually.

Or at least, that's what he thought.

A/N: I know, I know, short chapter this time around. But, I wanted to get it in so this story doesn't pace itself too fast. I wrote this in the campus library today during my break because I finally found the time to actually update this story. (I'm still not satisfied with what I've written for this installment 18...) My schoolwork has been taking its toll. I spend more than six hours on my homework almost every day. That's what I get for being an animation major. Lots and lots of drawing, and very little sleep and leisure time. -laughs- Considering it's already October, the next chapter will be, you guessed it, a Halloween one! I already have some ideas of what I want to write, but if you guys want to input suggestions, be my guest. ;)

I also wanted to make an announcement: Would anybody be interested in some Hetalia doujins? I bought them 3 years ago at my local anime convention out of impulse, but I don't need them. (Obviously, they're not translated.) I have three, the pairing being Ameripan in all of them but England is also in there because at the time, my favorite group was the Stray Trio (America, Japan, and England). I'm cleaning out my room, or at least, in the very gradual process of it, but I don't want to throw them away, but I also can't keep them (I don't want to find out what would happen if my mom ever discovers them when I'm not home). It's not porn, as they're all SFW, but man, the way I'm writing this, that's how it sounds huh? -laughs- Okay well there's one page that suggests Al and Kiku are doing the do, but they don't show anything so...yeah.

Please contact me if you're interested! I don't care about being paid a dime. I just want to get rid of them. LOL. Now I'm glad I never bought those FrUK ones because uh...I was very tempted to buy an R-18 one but...my little brother was with me that second day of the convention so...yeah. That would have been...very, very, awkward. (I FEEL LIKE A BAD PERSON.) Oh, yes, means of contact. Well, you can send me a message here, tweet at me on my public Twitter account, "broshounen", or send me a message on Tumblr. My username there is "sturaida".

Before I finally end this long Author's Note (THEY'RE ALMOST NEVER SHORT ANYMORE), I wanted to say that after this story, or even sometime soon, I'm going to start up a Free! fanfiction. I know I said I'd stop writing these things to focus on my original work but... It'll be multi-chapter as per usual, with most of the story being in Makoto's point of view (I love him so much. -sob-), but still in 3rd person. Nitori will also be a secondary character of importance. It'll start off RinHaru, but end up as MakoHaru and RinTori. That's what I envision. Side pairings include Reigisa and SeiGou. Yeah. You can blame all the prompts I've read on Tumblr...

My God. Look at all of that text. I really need to work on getting straight to the point and not ramble so much. That's probably why I'm incapable of writing "short" stories. Anyway, once again, thank you for continuing to read this story! I hope you'll see it to its end! Until next update! -vanishes like a vampire, because you know, Halloween soon- (Yeah...)