NRM Sensei-less

"Let me get this straight," Nabiki said. "You went to the Hokage's tower and returned with a mission scroll?"

"It's not my fault!" Mihoshi whined.

"Not like we really need a sensei anyway," Ranma said, absently opening the scroll and reading it.

"We may not need him for learning jutsu, but I'm pretty sure he'd come in handy for completing missions," Nabiki said sarcastically.

Ranma handed her the scroll to read.

Nabiki read the scroll. "Then again, I could be wrong."

"Did I miss something?" Mihoshi asked.

"Nabiki forgot how easy D-rank missions are," Ranma replied. "We can handle these easily."

"Someone's going to figure out that we don't have a sensei eventually," Nabiki said.

"If we can get enough missions done before then, they'll probably assign us a new sensei rather than send an experienced team back to the academy," Ranma pointed out.

"That's not a bad plan," Nabiki said as she considered it.

"So, I did good?" Mihoshi asked, hope coloring her tone.

"You did good," the pigtailed martial artist assured her before getting caught in a glomp by the happy blonde.

"Let's go see the vet," Nabiki said once she'd calmed Mihoshi down.

*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*

Ranma knocked on the door to the animal clinic and a young woman in a chunin vest answered the door. Speaking loudly to be heard over the myriad animal noises behind her, she asked, "You the genin team I requested?"

"Yeah," Ranma said loudly. "Show us to the dogs."

"I'm Hana," she said, extending a hand.

Ranma shook her hand, both of them instinctively putting enough strength to crack a walnut into it. "I'm Ranma, this is Nabiki, and Mihoshi."

Hana waved for them to follow her. "I have a bunch of stuff to do and some dogs who need personal attention." She led them through the back of the clinic and into the Inuzuka compound proper, which housed the kennels of the specially bred Inuzuka hounds.

It was a lot quieter outside the vet's office despite the number of dogs, many of which were barking or growling.

"I need someone to walk the twins," Hanna said as two large, black dogs came forward, carrying their own leashes. "Their partner is in the hospital and they've been driving everyone nuts wanting to go out."

"I'll do it," Mihoshi said, instantly folding to their puppy-dog-eyes-jutsu. She quickly attached their leashes to their collars and let them lead her off.

"They're going to drag her all over the place," Hana predicted as she showed Ranma and Nabiki to the next kennel. Of course, being an Inuzuka kennel it looked more along the lines of being a bachelor pad than an animal enclosure.

An enormous old dog that looked to be a combination of wolf and German shepherd was watching TV, his Hitai-ate covering his left eye as he lounged on a beat up sofa.

"This is Nodachi. His partner died about a decade ago, but he followed her last request and has helped train and protect the clan since then."

"I can speak for myself," the dog said in a dry voice, lifting his greying muzzle off his paws.

"Yeah, but generally you like to act mute around outsiders," Hana said.

"He smells... interesting," Nodachi admitted. "'Course, he also smells like he's been mounting his twin sister."

"I don't have a twin sister," Ranma growled, not needing any more rumors being spread about him.

"I think he's confused by the fact that you put out female pheromones when female and they stick to you and your clothes when you turn male again," Nabiki interceded before an argument could start.

"Never ran into that before," Nodachi said. "Have a seat and tell me about yourself."

Ranma dropped onto the sofa next to the old hound as Hana and Nabiki left. "Not much to say really. I'm an orphan, change sex with water, the usual."

The dog barked out a laugh. "An orphan isn't too unusual, but changing sex is unheard of, especially with water."

Ranma's stomach growled loudly.

"Hungry?" Nodachi asked, amused.

"It has been a couple of hours since I ate," the genin admitted.

"I'd take you out for lunch, but the pups around here think I'm too old to go for a walk outside the compound without half a dozen minders," the old dog admitted with a sigh. "And it's too much trouble to sneak out most times."

"I can handle sight, but smell would give us away," Ranma agreed.

"Smell's easy, you just need to manipulate the air around you. It gets a bit warm, but it can cover your smell for a couple of blocks from all but the best trackers," Nodachi said.

"Sight's easy, but it's a clan technique," Ranma said. "No one outside my team knows about it."

"I can keep my muzzle shut if it'll lead to some decent steak for lunch," he promised, licking his lips. "The kibble they feed me may be nourishing, but it tastes like crap."

"I'll have to carry you while I use it," Ranma said.

"I'm bigger than you and you need to be real close for my technique to work," Nodachi said. "So why don't I carry you?"

"Sure you can handle it, old timer?" Ranma challenged with a grin.

"Just try not to fall off, junior."

Five minutes and four blocks later...

Ranma and Nodachi walked out of a dark alley.

"Not bad," Nodachi admitted. "As long as you stick to rock, trailing you would require one of my clan."

Ranma's stomach growled, startling one of the nearby civilians.

"Follow me. I have standing reservations at the Akamichi Steakhouse," the dog said with a chuckle as they headed for the restaurant district.

The Akamichi at the front door greeted Nodachi like an old friend, "Hey, old wolf, who let you off your chain?"

Nodachi laughed. "Emery, you old butcher, still got my table?"

"Of course. Been a while since you came by."

"The young pups have got it in their heads that I should stay at home and eat kibble," he replied as they entered the restaurant. The early crowd was only just filtering in.

Emery snorted. "I hear that all too often. Emery, that can't be good for your blood pressure. Emery, you should try some oatmeal. The only thing raising my blood pressure is them interfering with my meals."

"Oatmeal's good," Ranma argued. "Put a fifth of a cube of butter in it and crumble up half a pound of bacon and it's the perfect thing to eat for breakfast."

"That does sound good," Emery admitted as they passed through a curtain into a back room that smelled of years of whiskey and cigar smoke. "I"ll do that the next time they pull that on me."

A number of grey haired old jounin, often missing bits, were scattered around a large room that looked more like a bar than a restaurant.

"Your usual?" Emery asked.

"Yeah, easy on the ice," Nodachi said, as he leapt up on a chair that was wider and higher than a human would use, putting him almost level with the table.

"Three steaks medium rare, two boneless chicken, and a quart of milk," Ranma ordered.

"Can you eat all that?"

Ranma's stomach growled loudly and there was an edge to it.

"Did I just feel killing intent coming from your stomach?" Emery asked in shock.

"It gets cranky when people doubt it," Ranma admitted.

"So what's my task?" Nabiki asked.

Hana opened the door to a large room filled with bits of rope and bowls of water and food everywhere.

"Clean the room?" Nabiki guessed.

"Nope. You get to entertain the puppies while their mothers are in for their checkups," Hana said as a dog drug in a wagon filled with little brown bundles of fur.

Options:

* "Puppies!" Nabiki squealed, buried under a flood of cuteness. "You'll get them from my cold, dead hands!"

* "Stop dragging me!" Mihoshi squealed, causing the two dogs to stop on top of the hot springs, standing on the water while she sank.

* "And they say I wolf down food," Nodachi chuckled as Ranma inhaled his lunch.

* "Since team nine's sensei is out of commission, do we need to assign them another?"

"No. It appears they impressed a retired Inuzuka jounin who volunteered to take his place. One Nodachi Inuzuka."

* Something Else!

Typing by: Ordieth!