Sorry this chapter took a while. I've been busy. (totes just got my license last weekend).

Okay, so I want to explain something about this chapter. In this whole fanfic, it's clear that Kurt has some sort of mental health issue (namely-depression). So, I wanted this chapter to show that people with a mental illness are not suddenly cured because they have started a relationship. Relationships definitely make people happier and feel less lonely, but it does not cure them. So, I don't want you guys to think Blaine doesn't make Kurt happy. He definitely does make Kurt feel cared for and loved, but that doesn't mean Kurt will cease to struggle with depression. (And, don't worry, Kurt will eventually get the help he needs in future chapters to come. Keep reading to find out.)

Warning: self-harm is mentioned in this chapter.

Thanks for reading and reviewing! I loved the reviews from last chapter.

Tumblr: klaine-engagement . tumblr . com

Chapter 15

Kurt saw Blaine at school on Friday. He was wearing his varsity jacket over a t-shirt that had a picture of the Beatles on it. Kurt rolled his eyes when he saw him. That didn't last long, he thought to himself, referring to the jacket. Blaine went a total of one day without it. He used to think that it was because Blaine didn't have any nice clothes worth showing off. But, he now realized that Blaine wears the jacket for protection. It could be assumed at their school that if someone wasn't wearing a uniform or jacket, then they weren't even worth looking at. Blaine probably thought that he could live without the jacket, but was proven wrong when band geeks had the nerve of looking at him.

Kurt wondered when Blaine got this way. At his old school, he wasn't popular. He told Kurt that he didn't have any friends. But, a lack of friends does not equal a lack of intimidation. It's possible that Blaine had always acted as if he were on top. Maybe that was how Blaine got through the day. Kurt tried not to judge, because he realized that feeling like you're on top of the world is a better way to live, rather than feeling completely unimportant. That was where he and Blaine differed. Blaine was filled with the confidence that Kurt never had.

"You okay?" Blaine asked Kurt during their lunch period. Kurt had been quiet all day.

"Yeah. I've just been thinking all day," Kurt explained.

"About?"

"A lot of things. I don't know. I've been thinking about my dad a lot, and how it's my fault that he has to work so much," Kurt said.

"Why are you thinking about that right now if it's making you upset?"

"Well, no, I thought about it this morning and then the thought put me in a bad mood. And then some of the hockey players were harassing me in the hallway this morning, which is why I didn't find you after second period," Kurt told Blaine, who frowned.

"Are you serious? What did they do?" Blaine questioned.

"No, nothing. I mean, they didn't hurt me or anything. They were just calling after me, you know? Saying rude things as I passed them in the hallway. It doesn't matter," Kurt said.

Blaine slipped his hand into Kurt's underneath the table. He was nervous because he didn't check to see if anyone was looking, but he tried not to care about who saw. Kurt smiled to show his appreciation.

Blaine picked up his fork with his left hand and fumbled with it. He chuckled lightly. "Sorry, I need this hand to eat," he mentioned quietly, and Kurt let go of his hand.

"It's alright," he said. Blaine tapped Kurt's foot with his own, hoping that footsie would make up for his inability to hold hands. He saw Kurt blush out of the corner of his eye.

When they got up to throw away their trash, Kurt glanced across the cafeteria to see Tina rolling her eyes as Rachel spoke at a rapid speed. They made eye-contact and Tina made a gesture with her finger to her forehead, miming a gun shooting her. She knew Rachel could see her doing that, but she didn't care. Kurt laughed.

"We should start sitting with them," Kurt said, pointing toward Tina who now looked like she was telling Rachel to shut up.

"The glee kids? Yeah, sure. But, can we still play footsie at their table?" Blaine asked.

"As long as you don't accidentally kick Mercedes," Kurt said.

By the end of the day, Kurt had seemed happier. Blaine thought that maybe Kurt was the type of person who got sad when it wasn't sunny out. Weather often had an effect on peoples' moods. But, maybe Kurt was just sad all the time and pretended to be happy until he no longer had the energy to pretend.

Blaine walked Kurt to his bus at dismissal. They didn't kiss or hug because there were students all around them. Blaine said, "I'll pick you up tonight with my dad's car. I'd tell you to dress nicely, but you've already done so. You look like you could be ready to go out right now. I, on the other hand, need a shower and more hair gel."

Kurt smiled. "I bet your natural hair is glorious," he said back. "Are we going somewhere fancy?"

"Not really. I mean, you can dress all nice like you always do anyway, because it's a date and all, but we're not going anywhere special. Wait, that's not what I mean. It is special, at least to me. But, it's not super-duper fancy, you know?" Blaine stammered

"Yeah. Thanks, Blaine. Really, we don't have to go out. I don't mind laying on my couch and watching Disney movies," Kurt said.

"Well, we can do that afterwards. I gotta go, I don't want to miss my bus. See you," Blaine said, and he walked away without waiting for a response.

Kurt tried smiling to himself on the bus so he could trick his brain into thinking he was happy. He had always thought that the reason he never felt happy was because he really had nothing to be happy about. But now, he was realizing that his sadness comes from deep within him, and he could never shake it. Even though he's genuinely happy with his life, he still has a layer of sadness surrounding him. He absolutely hated feeling sad for no reason, because that led to frustration, which would lead to stress. It was a dreaded cycle.

He wanted to feel happier by the time Blaine picked him up for the date. He didn't want Blaine to think that he wasn't doing enough to make him less sad. Blaine definitely made him happy, but his brain still thought that it was sad.

When Kurt got home, he was surprised to see his dad sitting in the kitchen.

"What's up, dad?" he asked.

"Nothing, kiddo. Just taking a late lunch. Blaine coming over tonight?" Burt asked, but he knew the answer. He decided that he would always assume Blaine was coming.

"Yeah. We're taking a drive later, then coming back here for tonight," Kurt said. Please do not ask any further questions on this matter, Kurt thought.

"Yeah? Where're you guys heading?" Burt asked. Kurt realized that he didn't actually know where they were going. Think quickly, Kurt. Be as vague as possible.

"Um, I don't think we've decided where to go yet. We just want to get out of the house," Kurt lied.

"Okay. Just let me know if you guys are going anywhere far and if you'll be out late," Burt responded blankly.

"Will do," Kurt promised.

Kurt walked upstairs to get ready even though the date wasn't for another few hours. He moisturized his face and fixed his hair. He considered changing his clothes, but he was certain that Blaine would show up in his varsity jacket, so it didn't matter what he was wearing. He sat on his bed and stared at the wall.

"Going back to work, see you tonight!" Burt hollered up the stairs.

"Kay," Kurt shouted back, but his voice was weak and didn't make it very far.

He continued to stare at the wall. He had no motivation to move. He heard his phone buzz, but he didn't want to check it. He just wanted to sit.

Eventually, sitting led to crying. This thoughts wandered enough to bring tears to his eyes. He wasn't even sure what he was crying about, but he didn't want to feel so stressed out when he went on the date. He knew that there was only one thing that could make him relieve the stress. The more he tried not to do it, the more he wanted to do it. But, he didn't want to break his streak of one week without it.

Finally, he gave in and went into the box where he kept his sharp objects. Razors were always his first choice, but he had back-up objects in the box as well. The box also held Band-Aids. He broke his skin open in one fast movement after another, then cried, and then breathed out very sharply. He looked at the clock. 4:27. He had until six for the redness of his skin to go down and the puffiness in his eyes to subside.

He changed from his short sleeve shirt to a long sleeved one of the same color. He hoped that Blaine wouldn't notice the difference, but figured that he probably would.

By the time six rolled around, Kurt seemed very much better. He drank coffee to animate himself, and he no longer looked like he had been crying. He wore a casual smile instead of a scowl. Color came to his face because he felt so much more light and happy. It was unfortunate that harming himself was his only escape from the darkness that surrounded him. But, it was his only option until he figured out how to fix himself.

When Blaine arrived at the door, the first thing he noticed was Kurt's smile. The first thing Kurt noticed was the flowers in Blaine's grasp.

"I love your smile. These are for you," Blaine said, handing the flowers to Kurt. "They aren't real, if you couldn't tell. So, you can just lay them down," Blaine mentioned.

"I'll put them in a vase anyway," Kurt responded. He walked into the kitchen and Blaine followed, shutting the front door behind him. After Kurt found a vase to put the brightly colored flowers in, he looked at Blaine in awe.

"Blaine. Oh my goodness. You look stunning," Kurt stated. Blaine was not in his varsity jacket. He wore a button down shirt with a dark gray cardigan over it, and pants that were just a shade of gray lighter than the cardigan. Kurt had never seen him look so nice before.

"Thanks," Blaine replied. He was blushing.

"I mean it. You look incredible. I love this look," Kurt continued throwing compliments at Blaine as Blaine's face grew redder.

"Oh, thanks Kurt. I tried to step up my fashion game for you," Blaine admitted. "Ready to go?"

"Yes, sir. May I ask where we're going?"

"You'll see. It isn't far away," Blaine stated.

He grabbed Kurt's hand and pulled him out of the door. Kurt locked the front door quickly and followed Blaine to his car.

"I have CDs, somewhere in here, if you want to look for them. Or we could listen to the radio or just not listen to anything at all. Do whatever you want," Blaine said while he was adjusting his mirrors.

Kurt looked through the CDs. He was surprised to see a very large variety of music selections. "Wow, Blaine, you have a lot of – no way. You have Taylor Swift?! No, wait, you don't just have one. You have all of her CDs. This is fantastic," Kurt said.

"Don't judge me! She's kind of, like, my music guilty pleasure," Blaine revealed, and Kurt laughed. "Okay, laugh it up. I love T-Swift."

"Blaine, Taylor is awesome. I'm putting in Fearless," Kurt said. He popped the album into the stereo.

"Fearless is my favorite. Like, the song. Not the album. Well, the album is probably my favorite, too," Blaine told Kurt.

"Fearless is my favorite song on this album, too!" Kurt said.

"Maybe one day we'll see her in concert together," Blaine joked.

Kurt listened closely to hear Blaine sing the song. Gradually, Blaine became louder. Kurt joined in, and they were both sing-screaming the song.

When the song ended, they laughed. "That was wonderful. We sounded great," Kurt joked.

"Thank god the windows were up," Blaine joked back. They continued to listen to Taylor Swift on the way there. They sang quietly when they knew the words, which was always.

"Here we are!" Blaine exclaimed as he turned his right blinker on. Kurt squinted his eyes to see where Blaine was pulling into.

"The pizza place?" Kurt questioned. Blaine hopped out of the car quickly so he could run around the car and open Kurt's door.

"Thanks. What a gentleman," Kurt said as he hopped out of the car.

"I'm pretty excited. This is our first date," Blaine said. He grabbed Kurt's hand and they walked toward to entrance.

"You may be wondering why I chose this as our special date location. I don't know if you recall but—"

"This is where we first met," Kurt finished his sentence just as he was making the connection in his head.

"Exactly! We met in that bathroom, right there," Blaine pointed to the bathroom in the back, "And, because of that very moment, my whole life changed."

Blaine made an order of plain pizza for the both of them, and then led Kurt to the back table, where he had been sitting with his father the day he met Blaine.

"Blaine, this is very sweet of you. In fact, it's romantic," Kurt commented.

"If only we hadn't met in a bathroom," Blaine said.

"Blaine. I'm so happy we met in that gross bathroom. My life would be completely different if you weren't here. Well, everything would be like it used to be. I used to feel so alone, and so lost. You kind of changed everything," Kurt told him.

"In a good way, I'm assuming?"

"In a great way," Kurt assured him.

Blaine reached across the table to hold Kurt's hand. They played footsie while they consumed their dinner. After their first slices, Blaine noticed a small group of guys pull up in a car outside of the window next to their booth.

"No way. Oh my god there's no way."

"What? What's wrong?" Kurt asked.

"Shit. Look out the window," Blaine directed.

Kurt leaned forward and turned his head. "Oh my god," he said.

Coming toward the door of the restaurant was a handful of the football guys. Blaine panicked as the got closer to the entrance. "Um, what are we going to do?" he asked hastily.

"Nothing. How would they know that we're on a date?" Kurt said.

"Look at the way I'm dressed, Kurt! Ugh, I knew I should've taken you out of town. Let's hide in the bathroom," Blaine suggested.

"We can't leave our food out in the open," Kurt said. Blaine heard the restaurant door open and he looked at Kurt with concern.

"Okay, go to the bathroom, Blaine. I'll stay here, ask for a box for our pizza, then we can leave out the back door, okay? Go ahead," Kurt said.

"Here's the money for the bill," Blaine said. He got up, kissed Kurt, and then swiftly walked toward the bathroom.

Kurt went to the counter and spoke to cashier. "Could we have a box for our pizza that we haven't finished, and the bill please?"

"Yes sir," answered the cashier.

Kurt walked back to the table with his empty box, when he heard whispers. "Is that Hummel?" he heard. He walked faster to his seat, but Karofsky followed him there. Kurt realized that there were three pieces of pizza left on the table and two glasses of soda. It looked as if he was not eating alone.

"Look who it is! My buddy, Kurt! How's it going, lady?" David said, putting his arm around Kurt.

Kurt tried to shake his arm away. "David, I was just leaving. So, please, just sit down."

"It looks like you're not here alone. I doubt a little guy like you could scarf down all this pizza. Who's the unlucky guy?" David questioned.

"I was here with my dad, and then he had to leave for a work thing very quickly. But, really, it's none of your business anyway," Kurt lied through his teeth.

"You want to know a funny coincidence? I was in the parking lot, and I spotted a car that looked like just the one Blaine's dad drives. I would know, because he's driven me home from practice. I recognized that football bumper sticker on the back. I thought I'd see him in here, but then I come to find you. Where's that hobbit hiding?" David asked. Think quickly, Kurt.

"Wow, you really know Blaine's car, after riding with him, probably once. You must be really interested in him. Well, I don't know whether that's his car, or not. I don't know whether he's here or not. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go call Tina for a ride home. I'll make sure to tell Blaine you were looking for him," Kurt said. One word came after another without any thought, but Kurt didn't care.

"I'm on to you and Blaine. I know what's really going on," David threatened.

Kurt walked out the back door with his pizza box in his hand and looked through the window to see David march back to his seat in the front of the restaurant. Kurt called Blaine.

"What's going on?" Blaine answered the phone.

"Okay, I don't know what to do from here. I'm outside. He saw your car. I told him that I didn't know whether you were here or not. Then I told him Tina was coming to get me. If you leave now, they won't see you leave the bathroom. But, they'll probably see you pull out of the parking lot," Kurt explained.

"You know what? I'm just going to make a run for it. You have my keys in your pocket, right? Go in the car and start it, then I'll run out and jump in a drive away quickly. This can't end badly," Blaine planned.

"Um, okay. I'm going toward your car now. Okay now I'm unlocking the car. Now I'm in the car. You can probably start running right….now!" Kurt advised. Blaine opened the door slowly, then left the bathroom and ran out of the back door of the restaurant. He opened the car door and jumped into his seat. Within the blink of an eye, they were gone.

"Yes! I doubt they even saw us. Thank god," Blaine chanted as they drove off.

"I can't wait for the day when we don't have to sneak around like that. But still, it was pretty funny," Kurt said.

"Are you upset that I didn't want them to see us together?" Blaine asked Kurt.

"No. I wish we could've finished our date, but I understand why you didn't want them to see you. I think you're very insecure, and you don't feel comfortable showing people the real you. Which is completely fine. I mean, you're lucky enough to be considered popular and fearless and intimidating and all those great things. So, you shouldn't throw those things away just because of me. You kind of have, like, the best of both worlds," Kurt explained.

"Thanks for understanding, Kurt. And, I'm sorry. I promise, one day I'll be able to wear skinny jeans and a button-down shirt with a matching bowtie to school without being scared of judgment, and I'll hold your hand and take you out on dates in super public places. I'm just not ready for that, yet. We still have so much of high school to get through, and it'd be easier if I could just be on top of the school so everyone will be scared of me and therefore no one will bother me. And no one will bother you, either, because they know they'll have to go through me."

"And you think that admitting your gay will make people less scared of you?" Kurt asked.

"If I admit my true self to everyone, it would be easier for them to get to me. It's not just the gay thing. It's everything. You're the only person that knows the first thing about me. But, you would never tear me apart for being who I am. People use other people's flaws or unusual characteristics to tear that person down. I'm not going to let anyone take me down," Blaine explained. Kurt nodded his head, but he wasn't sure if Blaine could see him because his eyes were on the road.

"But, hey, our date doesn't have to be over," Blaine said. "I always have a back-up plan."

He turned on his left blinker and made the turn. "Where are we going?" Kurt asked, immediately noticing the change of directions.

Blaine smiled. "You'll see," he said.

They drove for about twenty minutes until Blaine pulled over. Kurt looked around. "Are we in the middle of nowhere, Blaine?"

Blaine ignored the question and got out of the car. He opened the back seat to get the left over pizza, then opened Kurt's door for him. Kurt followed closely behind him as he opened the trunk and got out a blanket.

"Let's go," Blaine said. He led Kurt to the top of a grassy hill that was covered in dandelions. Blaine spread out the blanket.

"Oh! A picnic! Duh…. Awe, Blaine. This is so sweet," Kurt said. They sat on the blue and white checkered blanket and ate their pizza in silence. Kurt sat exceptionally close to Blaine on the ground. He leaned his head on Blaine's shoulder.

He turned to kiss Blaine's lips lightly, but then one little kiss led to more, and soon they were making out. They threw their crusts into the empty box that was beside them and fell into a deep kiss.

They were lost in their kiss for a long time, and Kurt had forgotten every bad thought he ever had.