Disclaimer: I don't own The Walking Dead so please don't sue me, also, Author's note at the end.
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"Hey daddy, you got a minute?" Beth had entered Hershel's cell, interrupting him from his scripture reading.
"For my Bethy? of course, what's on your mind sweetie?" He closed his bible and looked up at her.
"Dad I've been thinking, and I'd appreciate it if you gave me the chance to speak my peace. I don't mean any disrespect, and I speak with nothing but love." She said, sitting next to her father and looking him in the eyes.
"Well I take it this is very important to you, so go on then." He motioned for his little girl to speak.
"I feel like, you've been clinging to this idea that I'm going to be a little girl forever and I understand that this isn't the world you intended for me to enter adulthood in. Dad, I've had to shoot things that once were people, and I've had to take care of an infant before I've even lost my virginity. I know you want to protect me, I get it dad. You've changed my diapers, worried about me through illness and have taken care of me my whole life. I expect if Judith ever see's this age and has this talk with me I'd feel the same way you do, but I just need you to acknowledge that I'm a woman now. I'm at least 18 by my calculations. I've shown that I can not only take care of myself, but care for a child as well. I contribute to this group and I just want to be treated like the rest of you, like a person and not some fragile kid." Beth's face had become a purple shade, partly from forgetting to breathe properly, and the other part from blushing.
"I see that you're a woman now Beth. I don't want to but I do. I see the way you rock that baby back and forth on your hip and it reminds me of how your mother used to do the same to you when you were little. I see the eyes you give Daryl, and Rick, and I see the conflict in you rising even though you don't dare think about it because you know you have a job to do. We all have jobs to do, and I'm glad you're figuring out which job is yours and which one isn't. I won't ever stop worrying about you, or looking at you like you're 5 because those are the moments that I miss the most. I wish I could have prepared you for all this, for what's going to happen and I can't. Just promise me that no matter what you choose, that you'll always take care of yourself first, okay? That's the one area that you've always needed help with, that you can't help others if you can't help yourself." Hershel wiped a tear from his daughter's cheek and sniffled a little himself as he spoke.
"I love you daddy." Beth said before pulling him into a hug, tucking her head under his chin and wrapping both arms tightly around him.
"I love you too Bethy, but I mean it, you've got a lot to sort out, don't just ignore it until it bubbles over."
"Will do, thanks daddy." She said as she got up and left his cell.
On her way to pick up Judith from Carl she contemplated what her dad had said, about the way she looks at Daryl and Rick. She always assumed that she looked at them with respect and compassion, that's all she's ever really let herself feel towards the protectors of the group.
The more she thought about it, the more she found herself weighing their pros and cons. Not intentionally, or like a checklist, but just a flow of observations. She noticed that she enjoyed those heart to heart talks with Rick whenever she had the time but she knew he never noticed her unless she made herself known to him. Whereas Daryl could always tell when she was broken. It's like he had this sixth sense for when she was at her limit and he'd step up to lighten her load. It's like what Rick lacked in observation Daryl made up for, and what Daryl lacked in talking, Rick made up for. If you combined the two, you'd have the perfect man to be involved with during a time like this.
That last thought made Beth stop dead in her tracks. Was she looking for a man to be with so soon after Zach's death? Or had she been observing Rick and Daryl strictly for entertainment. She admitted that the power struggle between Rick and Daryl was far more subtle than that between Rick and Shane or Rick and the Governor.
Then she realized that all of the power struggles had involved Rick, but the one between him and Daryl wasn't a struggle so much as a distribution of duties. She'd sensed that something had put them at odds for a while though, pretty much ever since the last attack from the governor felt like Rick and Daryl were competing for something.
She'd begun to walk again, trying to figure things out but decided that it was time to set these thoughts aside and play with the adorable chubby cheeked baby she missed so much.
Beth pushed the sheet to the side and saw Carl with Judith in his lap and some sidewalk chalk in his hand. Beth had to admit that these floors and walls were wonderful for coloring, it could easily be washed off or you could move to a different cell.
"Hey" she said, moving to be in front of the two. Judith's face lit up upon realizing who was there and wiggled her way out of her big brother's lap and into Beth's.
"Thanks for coming by a bit early, she's been a ball of energy all day and I stayed up way too late last night." Carl blushed as he spoke, it was subtle but Beth pretended not to notice.
"I understand, you can go take a nap if you want, I've got her from here. You and your daddy need some rest." Beth bounced the baby on her knee's a bit and that seemed to satisfy the little girl for a few minutes.
Carl ducked under the sheet of the cell and disappeared.
Beth really did miss this little girl. She bounced her, and then blew raspberries on her tummy to hear the little giggle she missed most in the world. She kept playing with Judith to suppress the conflict that was rising in her mind.
Just as Beth bent down to pick up some of the sidewalk chalk on the floor to draw the alphabet she heard the sheet shuffle. Beth's instincts kicked in, her hand immediately went to the knife at her hip, but it was only Daryl. His lips slightly curled at the ends as he leaned against the wall near the entrance.
"Hey" was all Beth said before picking up a piece of blue chalk.
"Hey, how's been your day so far?" Daryl asked, coming to sit next to Beth then taking the giggling baby from her lap.
"So far so good. I was just going to write the alphabet and some numbers. Might as well start trying to teach her the basics right?" Beth smiled before moving down to the floor. She began to go through the letter's as capitols.
"If the world hadn't gone to shit I bet you'd have been the perfect mother and teacher." Daryl said before he could catch himself.
"Well I don't know, I had dreams of being a country singer, kind of like Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood. I wanted to keep my integrity and share my voice. I never really saw myself settling down." Beth was halfway through, she stopped for a second to move her braided hair to the opposite side out of her face.
"I never saw myself settling down either, but now that it's not really an option I find myself going the 'what if' route. I don't think I'd make a great father. Hell, the only name I could come up with is lil asskicker, and yea babies are cute but as soon as I smell something I pass them off to the nearest parent." Daryl chuckled a little to himself.
"I'm of the belief that anyone can do anything if they want it bad enough. I mean, I used to be horrible with guns..."
"You still are but now I can count on you at least slowing them down enough so I can reload another bolt." Daryl interrupted. Beth left a blue colored hand print on his chest from pushing him back a bit.
"I average about 1 out of 4 or 5 shots is a head shot so you shut up. I've gotten better and that's because I practice a lot with it. If you wanted to be a daddy, I'm sure Rick would let you babysit her a lot more. Though I have no idea what woman would be crazy enough to get pregnant right now." Beth had returned to scribbling down number's all the way to 30, she hadn't intended to write that many but she found it comforting to keep going as she spoke.
"It's tempting when we got such a cutie to take care of, makes you think you can really start to rebuild here." Daryl said, making brief eye contact as he lifted Judith for Beth to take. "and I suppose you're right. The real problem would be finding a woman crazy enough to want to have something with me." Daryl blushed a bit as he stood. He took breath as if to say something but Beth interrupted.
"I didn't say she had to be crazy to want to be with you, I said she had to be crazy to knowingly want to be pregnant during all this. There's a huge difference Dixon, and don't you go thinking that I don't see you for who you are." Beth smiled up at him, then realized that she'd lost the blue piece of chalk. She looked at Judith to see that her little hand was wrapped around it, and aiming straight for her mouth.
"Ewww no Judy! icky, that'll make your tummy hurt too." Beth said, snatching the chalk away so quick it upset the toddler for a bit before she focused on the big braid on her shoulder and started pulling on it. Daryl was laughing.
"I could stay a bit, looks like you'll have your hands full if I don't" He leaned down to uncurl the little one's fingers from her braid.
"Thanks, I forgot how quick she can be. Can you hold her a second while I fix this?" She blushed, but then felt the weight of the baby being lifted off her lap. Beth took the band from the bottom of her braid, then twisted the braid around the base of her ponytail, making a tight bun, then twisted the head band to secure the bun in place.
"I'd like to think that if the world were different maybe I'd eventually got my shit together and and made something of myself. I think that's just who I am now, trying to reconcile who I used to be." Daryl said, once in a while making funny faces at the little girl to get her to giggle at him.
"If the dead didn't start walking, who knows who'd any of us would be? It brought out the best in you, and the worst in others. I completely lost it in the beginning. If I'd lost my daddy, if Andrea hadn't let me make that decision, I wouldn't be here for Judith. I'm just saying, you can't compare who you are now with who you once were. I have no idea what your career was, how you grew up, when you had your first kiss and honestly I don't care. It's none of my business. That's not the Daryl I see today anyway." Beth began tidying up the cell a bit, stocking the diapers on the changing table and readying wipes. picking up the chalk all over the ground and putting it in a bucket in the corner.
"When'd you'd get so damn thoughtful?" Daryl asked, placing lil asskicker on the floor to crawl a bit
"Since someone gave me a break from being a babysitter. I'm figuring some things out you know? I think we all are. I see us as kind of a phoenix type scenario. We just gotta let the world burn so we can rise above the ashes, and that little girl's our hope. That's her job, and mine is to protect her by any means necessary. That's about as far as I got." She looked at the ground, dusted the chalk off her hands on her jeans and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.
"You don't have to, I mean, every one see's you steppin up Beth. You don't have to give your life to that baby, you don't owe Rick to be his slave and tend to his every need." Daryl was a bit upset but careful not to let it show.
"If I don't do it, who will? The way i see it theres so much fucked up in this life that she's growing up in. So much loss and heart break and she won't even know that her mom, despite all her flaws made the ultimate sacrifice for her, for all of us. I don't owe Rick, but I owe Judith that much." Beth spoke with conviction, and for the second time that day tears were welling behind her eyes.
"You've got a good heart Beth, I just don't want to see that get taken advantage of." Daryl's voice cracked a little and he managed to walk out of the cell, practically bumping into Rick who was standing just outside listening.
Daryl looked at him, speechless but unflinching before shaking his head and walking away.
"Beth? Is everything alright?" Rick pushed back the sheet to see Beth sitting on the edge of the cot, head in her hands but tilted towards watching Judith trying to pull herself up on anything she can grab onto.
"Yea I'm fine. You should probably go get some rest while you can though." Beth looked back at him and smiled. There was a slight sniffle but Rick pretended he didn't hear it.
"Alright, don't hesitate to get me if you need anything I'll be in the next cell over." Rick called before turning to his room.
Rick laid in his cot, his son was snoring in the bunk above him and despite being so tired, sleep alluded him. He couldn't figure out what Daryl had meant. Why he'd said what he said and looked at Rick before leaving.
"You don't owe Rick to be his slave and tend to his every need... I just don't want to see that get taken advantage of." Daryl's word were running through his mind.
Rick never thought he was taking advantage of Beth. Maybe the first time he'd noticed her as pretty young woman he'd felt like a dirty old man but never did he think he'd take advantage of such a sweet young woman.
He finally turned on his side and figured he'd talk to Daryl about it after he got some sleep.
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Author's note: Okay, so I'm getting a lot of asks about pairings. I understand as a reader you're loyal to your ships. There's a reason I have it listed as Rick, Daryl and Beth. That's all I'm going to say. I was hoping for more development in this chapter but I didn't want to rush it just because I had crazy scheduling difficulties this last month. I Just don't feel right trying to explain it before it develops just to keep people reading.