Thanks for all the reviews and follows! Fun to get your take on all this. Okay, Erin and Kelly had their first kiss on CPD, and I loved it! So cute and her dimples were priceless. I hope Linseride is on. I'm trying not to get my hopes up because CF has disappointed me so this season.
On to my story...thanks for sticking with it. I know, I know, it's heavy right now. Sorry, but I'm not brushing past injury in 30 seconds like the show sometimes does. Happy times will come in chapters to come. Kelly's turning a corner in this update. Hope you enjoy!
Erin brushed past the nurse thinking you've gotta be kidding me.
A huge smile spread across her face when she saw Kelly awake, eyes open, looking a little less pale...maybe wishful thinking.
"You're awake. Kelly..." she rushed to his side, softly touching his forehead, placing her lips on his cheek.
He turned his face away.
"Just go," he whispered.
"Kelly, thank God," said Shay shuffling past the exasperated nurse making her way to the other side of her best friend's bed.
"Both of you. Get the hell out," he said louder closing his eyes tightly.
High pitched beeping rang out with both women looking at the nurse for help now.
"You heard him. Get the hell out! Let me do my job," the nurse shouted pushing Erin out of the way to give Kelly an extra dose of morphine, try to get the heart rate down. He does not need this right now, she thought. She'd heard the doctor. It was so much to take in. Too much. At least for now.
Kelly wouldn't see anyone the rest of that day or the next or the day after. He barely spoke to Dr, Montgomery and when Benny arrived, his son didn't acknowledge he was in the room.
"He's obviously having a hard time accepting what's happened. Hasn't accepted it. He will. He'll have to." Monty explained to a bewildered and desperate dad.
Benny took over the decision making in Kelly's healthcare, agreeing to another surgery where an orthopedic surgeon would affix two steel rods, permanently. It tore at Benny's heart to see his son so weak, so broken...and so desolate. Dammit, you're a fighter.
The hip was addressed next. The orthopedic talked about a grade four fracture...pinning it was useless. He'd have to perform a hemiarthroplasty or partial hip replacement.
"I'm the damn one who should be gettin' the hip replacement. Not my son," Benny's eyes watered over. Kelly didn't say a word.
"Actually, this procedure is most common with injury. Full replacement is usually done on the elderly with degenerative arthritis."
Kelly heard a bunch of gibberish, letting the words flood together in an unrecognizable sound that didn't resemble the English language. Better that way.
Do whatever to me, he thought. Doesn't matter. Nothing matters. Why the hell didn't they just let that house keep me, swallow me up and not spit me out?
What kind of man will I be? No squad...limping around like a damn invalid. No woman in her right mind...sure as hell not a woman like Erin. She deserved a helluva lot more than playing nurse maid to half a man. Hell, who knows if I'll even be able to...
Kelly let the demons in his mind take over. The pain, the morphine, all making lucid thoughts impossible.
The latest surgery went as well as could be expected. Kelly felt more like a piece of meat...just carve away he thought bitterly. He saw each new surgery as another part of his old self being taken away...not as a step in fixing his shattered leg and hip.
Benny split his time between Beth and the kids and Kelly's bedside. He was putting forth an effort to make amends for so many things and was stretched to the limit. When he was away, Shay took over. She was the only other one he would semi-respond to.
"Kelly, you can start physical therapy on Monday. This is good news!" Shay tried again to get through that thick skull. C'mon, she thought, this is not you.
Erin was at a loss. She sat by her boyfriend's side, trying to stay positive, trying to comfort, to love. But it was like talking to a brick wall. She was shut out. She couldn't get through.
She turned to the thing that had been her life for so many years...the job. The security blanket that saw her through so many lonely nights. Catching the terrorist became her obsession. And Voight's. He was glad to have the company in his single desire to take down a terrorist who'd messed with his city.
"How's your guy?" asked Voight hesitantly, knowing Erin didn't mention the fireman anymore, always available for a run to follow up on another lead.
"My guy? I don't really know. Haven't been by in, uh, three, four days."
"And why's that, Linds?"
"I think he needs some time."
"It's been weeks. I'd call that time. Is he out of Lakeshore yet?"
"Are we gonna share feelings all day or can we call this session over?"
"You got it," said Hank more worried about his detective than ever.
Jeff Clarke was sick of being the fill-in lieutenant of squad. He was sick of all the "poor Kelly" talk at the firehouse. Shay mopin' around like someone had died. Casey talking to an immobile lump of what was left of squad's boss, never getting mad, keeping it positive. Trying to break through with that sunny disposition. Gabby taking dish after dish to Lakeshore only to have it ignored.
This shit is comin' to an end. Today.
Clarke strode into Kelly's room, opening the blinds noisily.
"Hey, Severide!" he said too loudly for the hushed hospital. "We're takin' a little road trip today. I'm sure you're ready to get the hell outta this place," he said, fake smile affixed on his face.
Kelly's eyes opened a little wider, not knowing how to respond. When Clarke came to his bedside and removed his IVs, he knew this guy meant business. When Jeff pulled a T-shirt over his head roughly, he knew he was about to be taken out of this room.
"What the hell?" yelled Kelly in a voice he hadn't used in four weeks, loud, angry.
"My thoughts exactly," replied Clarke, that same crazy smile plastered on his face.
"I can't leave. They won't let you take me out of here."
"They? They? Who do ya think is stoppin' me?"
Clarke pulled sweats on his friend noticing the wince when he slipped the injured leg in. He knew Kelly was supposed to be up moving the damn thing. This'll probably help it, he rationalized.
He picked him up in one quick swoop, depositing him in a wheelchair he "borrowed" on his way up. Then he wheeled it straight out of the room, out of the hospital.
There was a rush of "what are you doing" and "stop" called his way, but Clarke just a kept on going. He picked up Kelly depositing him in the front seat, folded up the chair, throwing it in the trunk. They were gone.
"Where the hell are we going? I can't be out...out of there. We need to go back!"
"Why? Because you love it here so much? No, you need a field trip, so shut your mouth and just sit there. That's what you're good at now, right?"
They pulled up on a run down rec center, parking lot full, and Kelly figured Clarke was going to make him do some rehab, try to get him walk or something. Good luck, he thought.
Jeff wheeled his lieutenant inside, and Kelly knew he couldn't have been more wrong.
"Get me outta here," he demanded, feeling like he'd been slapped in the face. "Get me outta here now," he repeated.
"No can do." Clarke wheeled him in further to check out all of the action.
The rec center was loud, cheering, yelling throughout. One side had men and women sitting on the floor, a net in between two teams...a paraplegic volleyball match going strong.
The other side was set up for basketball, wheelchairs spinning around, men swatting at the ball, at each other...trying to get that ball in the hoop.
Kelly saw men and women, all shapes and sizes playing on both sides. Some had missing legs, others had their limbs, but they remained immobile. The rest of their bodies were anything but immobile.
Severide looked past the disabilities and started getting into the matches, the basketball piquing his interest.
He found himself involuntarily routing for the red team, definitely older than the other. Most of the men in their thirties, forties, some beyond. The other side was made up of young punks probably in their twenties.
Jesus, twenty and missing two legs, thought Kelly. He couldn't believe how fast they were. Turning his attention to the volleyball, he knew some of those men and women were moving twice the speed of one Mouch.
When the matches were over, Clarke started with the introductions...hell, he seemed to know half the gym.
Kelly had to smile, to be polite. He couldn't ignore these men and women who'd just poured everything they had into the competition. He grinned, shook hands, talked a little...felt so weird to have some semblance of normality after lying on his back, sullen for four weeks.
"Sorry to break up the party, but I gotta get you back," said Clarke reading the five texts from Shay, three from Casey, and one thrown in from Dawson. Shit.
Kelly didn't want to leave. These guys were amazing, bullshitting...no mention of their missing or not working parts, no one saying the word disability.
They didn't speak on the drive back. Both men deep in thought.
Clarke wheeled Kelly in his room to the waiting Shay and Dr. Montgomery.
"Where the hell did you go?" yelled Shay as she rushed to Kelly's side.
"You should check with me before springin' him next time," commented Monty helping his patient back into bed, reattaching IVs and monitors.
"He's okay, right?" asked Clarke.
"I'll get back to you."
Shay and Clarke drank a cup of coffee in silence before the doctor came out, the only sounds, deep sighs from a pissed off blonde.
"He wants to see you. Alone." Monty pointed at Jeff.
A stunned Shay was left alone.
Clarke walked in slowly not looking forward to the verbal slap down he anticipated, maybe firing.
"Sit," ordered Kelly.
"You okay?" asked Clarke sitting in the chair by the bed.
"Better now. Clarke..."
"Yeah?"
"Thanks." Kelly planned to say more but choked back the words. One hand running through his hair and back down his face, taking in a deep breath, trying to get control.
Those men and women had lost so much. He had both legs, both arms. A body intact.
I'm through playin' the victim, he thought.
Shay walked in the room, straight to him, wrapping those arms around as much of him as they could hold. Those familiar arms, the hug he knew would always be there. Her head buried in his shoulder, the warmth of her body pressing in his, her hot tears on his skin...he had needed this. He knew he should have accepted this weeks ago.
She pulled away slightly looking in his eyes. Blue meeting blue.
"You're gonna be alright, Kel."
So Clarke to the rescue. I figured he would know wounded warriors who could make a difference to Kelly. Also, he's not the type to coddle anyone, so logical choice to make a breakthrough. Shay will always be there, so had to include her at the end. Haha! Now, where's Erin? Hmmm...can they make it back to each other? Thoughts?