This chapter has been edited.

It had been weeks since Sam had walked in on his brother underneath his male companion, and the air had been tense. He had tried to approach the subject a few times, but after having to dodge a few swings, he had decided that it would be best if he were to just let it go. As it was, the angels had Adam and they were deciding the best course of action, but Sam could tell that between the three of them, none of their heads were in the game. Bobby had to keep snapping them back to attention, and after holding a one-sided conversation for ten minutes he gave up and left the house.

This left Sam, Castiel, and Dean standing awkwardly in the living room. Dean had been pointedly not looking at the angel, and Castiel continued to stare at something just on the other side of the room, somber expression pulling at his features. He was standing practically on the other side of the room from Dean, who had picked up a book and started flipping through the dusty pages. Sam looked between the two of them, growing more frustrated by the moment. Right when he had opened his mouth to say something, Dean cleared his throat, straightened, mumbled something inaudible and left the room. Sam closed his mouth with an audible click as Dean pushed past him and up the stairs.

A few awkward moments passed of Cas staring up the stairs after his brother, and Sam rubbing his neck and arguing with himself over whether or not he should ask the question going over and over in his mind.

"I suppose I'll just be-"

"Are you in love with my brother?" Sam blurted out, clearly taking the angel by surprise.

"Of course not." Cas replied, just a touch too hastily. His voice had become strained, he was giving a fake toothy grin, and all the color had drained from his face. Sam cocked an eyebrow at the angel, obviously knowing he was not telling the whole truth. After a few minutes Cas dropped the fake grin, and sat down on the couch behind him, a small puff of dust coming out under his weight. He put his head in his hands and sighed, looking very small and very human. After a few more minutes of awkward silence Sam took a step closer to the couch.

"Cas, I know we're not close and I'm pretty sure you don't exactly like me, but even so. I know my brother and I'm just looking out for him so I need to know. Do you – ya know – love him or something?"

"It's not that simple Sam." Cas began, speaking quietly to the floor. "I could not have partaken in any form of sexual activity with your brother if I felt nothing more than primitive lust for him, it would have been adulterous. We share a more…" He paused, removing his hands from his face and staring down at them as though he'd never seen them before. "Profound bond. Whether or not he realizes it, I am bonded to him." His cheeks tinged pink and Sam leaned in a little closer, not sure what he was hearing. "When I raised him from perdition, I stormed Hell. It was the most important mission I had ever been on, that I most likely will ever be on again." He faltered for a moment before clearing his throat and continuing. "Six of us went in to retrieve the Righteous Man, only I returned. When I finally found your brother he had been torturing a man, I told him I had come to rescue him." Castiel shifted and clasped his hands before looking up at Sam. "He fought me, shouting that he didn't need to be saved. I was under orders; I was to bring him back to the living, whatever it took. His soul was so broken, so full of hatred and self-loathing that there was no way I was going to be able to bring him to the surface and he survive the trip. I did the only thing I could think of; I imbued him with some of my Grace."

"You did what?" Sam sputtered. "What does that even mean?" Castiel sat back and narrowed his eyes at the younger Winchester.

"It does not change who he is," He began slowly, Sam visibly relaxed. "A grace-sharing ritual is generally used to mate angels." Sam sat down hard against the desk, he looked at Cas bug-eyed. Castiel saw the verge of panic and continued. "However, I had to think quickly because Dean is not an angel, and I did not wish to mate myself with him. I did something similar, but not exact. I only gave him enough of my Grace to smooth over the cracks in his soul so I could retrieve him. That is why he has the handprint on his arm."

"From your Grace?" Sam said slowly.

"Yes." Cas tinged pink again and began speaking again, more quietly this time and Sam had to lean in to hear. "My Grace does not affect him, not any more than a scar, it has since burned out." Something clicked in Sam's brain and he leaned back slightly.

"But it affects you."

"I-" Cas looked up to meet Sam's eyes before dropping them once again to the floor and nodding. "Yes. It does. Not so much anymore, but I have never been mated. I have never shared my Grace with anyone, angel or otherwise," Cas rubbed his neck in a very human gesture before he shrugged. "I've never had occasion to."

"So, what does that mean then?"

"It means that I am simply more in tune to my own – emotions – toward your brother than I would be otherwise. Emotions which have been more than.." He paused, searching for the right word. "Friendly." Sam nodded, he understood. He may not completely agree, but he understood. Castiel sighed again and stood from the couch. "Dean is under the illusion that he is not a homosexual." Sam reeled back at the sudden change of topic.

"Well, I – What?" He responded eloquently.

"Being an angel I can sometimes read people's thoughts. I generally choose not to, at least not anymore, but with my Grace being inside Dean, sometimes the loudest of his thoughts scream into mine, and I have no choice."

"Okay..?" Sam said cautiously, not sure he wanted to know where this was going.

"Whenever we engage in anything sexual, his thoughts scream into my head 'I am not gay'." He tilted his head to the side and stared at Sam. "Obviously he must be, if he is engaging in sexual acts with a man, although I'm not necessarily a man. Only my vessel is male, angels don't have genders."

"Okay, that's enough." Sam interrupted, shifting uncomfortably.

"What?" Castiel narrowed his eyes and Sam shifted again, he suddenly felt a kinship with ants under magnifying glasses.

"Look," Sam sighed and slid a hand through his hair mulling the words together in his head before speaking them. "Dean and I – well we're not exactly the best at expressing emotions that expose weakness; like love. If something bad knows you love something, what you love becomes the target. I loved Jessica more than anything, and she was targeted and died because of me. That's what this business does; it kills people, even us. I'm sure even you will die too, probably soon considering how happy you've made Dean – "

"He doesn't seem too happy at the moment."

"Because you've proven to him that he's vulnerable. Right now you're his weak spot, and he just realized it. As for the gay thing, that's probably something you'll have to deal with. Our father instilled a lot of his ideals into our heads, one of them being mildly homophobic." He sighed again. "And as for the freaky angel grace thing, you're going to want to tell him about that before he finds out on his own."

"Why? It does nothing to him, only to me."

"Because he doesn't like people messing around in his head, even if it was before he met you, besides, it's kind of weird." He shrugged and regarded Cas who shook his head.

"His emotions are so complex and uncontrollable. What do I do?"

"Give him some space." Sam replied simply, staring at the angel. With a minute nod, there was a flutter of wings and Sam was alone.

"I've got a plan." Dean said as we walked back into the living room, his hair was dripping wet from having taken a shower. "When Zachariah took me into the white room he left me there for a while, if we could find that white room we could grab Adam, kill that dick angel and Michael wouldn't possess anyone."

"Okay," Sam replied, he had moved to the couch and was nursing a beer, trying not to think too much about how creepy the angel-mating thing was. "But where is the white room."

Dean thought about this for a moment. "I don't know, but we should probably get researching, since it looks like the nerd angel disappeared again. Figures." As Dean turned away Sam saw the smallest glimmer of sadness pass over his features. He shook his head and hoped he would get over it.