TW(?): The song I used mentions Self harm so...Just to be safe. Oh and a LOT of swearing. Enjoy!
The world seemed to stop for Dan.
'Shit.' was the only comprehensible thought which he seemed to be able to form at the sound of the familiar voice.
He turned slowly to look backwards, with Phil's hand still interlocked with his own, and saw her. The dark hair, the blue eyes and the slim figure that had haunted his conscience for so long was just standing there with her hands on her hips and a smirk on her lips. The unnamed prostitute. She confidently sauntered over to them, looking Dan up and down before her eyes zoned in on his and Phil's intertwined fingers and grinned mischievously
"So handsome, how's the whole 'I'm not gay' thing working out for you?" Dan glared at the woman, pulling Phil behind him slightly and saying nothing. Phil looked from Dan back to the mysterious woman and back to Dan again. His face grimaced in confusion before gripping Dan's hand tighter
"Dan...whose this?" Dan forced his eyes away from her to glance back at Phil who was looking at him inquisitively. Dan swallowed harshly.
"No idea."
"Oh come on now sweetheart, you were definitely pissed but not that pissed. Never would have taken you for a 'Dan' though" She replied nonchalantly, putting emphasis on his name. Raising a hand, she went to rest it against Dan's chest seductively however, Dan caught it in mid air and threw it back rather harshly causing her to frown. This did not deter her however
"Mind you, we did say no names and no feel-"
"I don't know you. Leave us the fuck alone." Dan cut her off abruptly
"Dan..." Phil tightened his grip more in a silent gesture to tell him to calm down. He shot Dan a confused look, feeling quite shocked at Dan's aggressive attitude towards the younger woman. It was kind of apparent that he did know her at this point...So why was he lying? He looked towards the woman as he addressed her
"Sorry but er, do you know us? Are you like a fan or something?" Phil asked politely giving small smile. She cast one more smug look towards Dan before smiling brightly at Phil and answering him
"Yeah. I'm definitely a huge fan of...Dan's" She paused for a second to take Phil in properly. She noticed he was just as attractive as Dan.
"Might I inquire your name though cutie?" Dan opened his mouth to protest but Phil had already replied before he could
"I'm Phil" Her eyes widened at his name her polite smile morphed into an almighty grin. She pushed her hair back and joined her hands in front of her to give an appearance of innocence.
"Oh so you're the famous Phil that Dan moaned out whilst we were-"
"Shut up!" Dan practically yelled, releasing Phil's hand and walking menacingly towards her, causing her to back away slightly. However this sudden aggressive did not stop her flirtatious nature as she continued
"Well doesn't this seem familiar? You backing me into a dark corner and-"
"I said shut the fuck up"
"Dan!" Phil grabbed the back of Dan's jacket to prevent him, from what it looked like, going to attack the woman.
'Who on earth could she be?' Phil thought as he stared continuously between them both. Dan had gone from happy and caring to angry and defensive the second she had turned around and opened her mouth. She claimed to be a fan of Dan's but he would never act this way towards someone who watched their video's so...'Maybe an ex girlfriend?' But then why would Dan deny knowing her?...'A stalker perhaps?' Phil shook his head and carefully observed the exchanging angry glares from Dan and the flirtatious looks from the unknown woman. No one spoke as the dark haired woman shot challenging smirks towards Dan who glared back in an almost pleading way. Eventually Phil gave in to the deafening silence and stepped forward slightly in front of Dan
"So er miss...?"
"Sorry sweetie, I don't give out my name for safety reasons due to my line of work" She sent a wink towards Dan who as good as growled at her as if in a warning. This response just deepened Phil's confusion
"Right...Okay then, miss." He paused in consideration for a moment before continuing "What do you want with me and my boyfriend?"
The smirk never seemed to leave her face as she teased them both relentlessly. Dan could see she was clearly enjoying putting him through hell which did nothing but piss him off even more. 'Of all the places and all the times why did she have to be prowling around here?' Dan wasn't one to believe in karma or fate but at the moment he couldn't help but think it was being a damned bitch. A little like the whore grinning at him.
"Well I did come to see why your handsome Dan here never called me back...But I'd be more than willing to offer my service's to both of you for half the price. Especially for someone as cute as you" She twirled a piece of hair between her fingers and watched their reactions. Phil looked immensely shocked and a little repulsed at the suggestion whilst Dan had to clench his fist's in an attempt to restrain his anger from taking control and saying something he might later regret.
"Sorry but we er, we don't do anything like that...We need to go now anyways so...Bye" Phil answered awkwardly, tugging at Dan's sleeve to pull him away and for them to leave the now revealed street walker, but froze at what she said next
"Well you're 'boyfriend' here could've fooled me"
The atmosphere became still and tense as the words sunk into Phil's mind. She wasn't possibly suggesting that her and Dan had...
'No...Dan's not...He wouldn't...' Phil's thought's trailed off as he peeked at Dan's rage contorted expression and he swallowed. 'Or...would he?' It suddenly hit him like a ton of bricks. The guilty looks, the distancing from him earlier, the note...Dan must have cheated on him with someone else. A prostitute no less. No...He couldn't believe that...
"Dan?" He whispered quietly, tugging on his sleeve. Dan turned and his face instantly softened at seeing the ushered tears in Phil's eyes which were threatening to spill.
"Tell me that's not true...She's lying, yeah?" Dan forcibly smiled at him.
"Of course she's lying! When on earth would I have had chance to sleep with her? I never leave the apartment! And when I do it's usually with you!" Dan finished sending a smug look towards the dark haired beauty. Of course she didn't appreciate being called a liar just as much as he did. She ignored his triumphant look and concentrated on Phil.
"Believe him if you want love, but ask yourself this. About a month or so ago, was there ever a day when he didn't come home? Did he ever say he 'was on a business meeting' or 'was just staying at a friends house'?" Phil knew he should've ignored her and just pulled Dan away from her with him and gone home yet, there was something nagging him in the back of his head that she wasn't lying. Dan reached out began tugging at his arm for them to leave which wasn't helping his train of thoughts.
"There was that night you stayed at Louise's...But she said you were there all night..." He looked towards Dan who nodded suspiciously quickly
"I was. See? She's just messing with your head Phil"
"I am not. It's not my fault you're just a cheating scumbag" she retorted angrily
"I am not! We weren't even together at that point even if I did 'sleep with you'" He added air quotations at that part "You're just a desperate slag after our money-"
Phil buried his face into his hands as he tried to think whilst Dan and the prostitute continued to hurl insults at each other. Everything she said was making sense yet at the same time Phil was desperate to believe what Dan was saying. He deliberated about what to do and eventually came to a solution.
"Oh screw you. You're just pissed I took your money"
"Like I would give money to a-"
"Shut up!" Phil demanded. His sudden outburst caused both male and female to become quiet instantly. Phil turned to her first
"So, you're basically saying you willing slept with my boyfriend for money?" She folded her arms confidently and nodded at him. Phil, ignoring the stinging sensation he felt in his heart, turned to Dan who had his eyes fixed to the floor.
"And you're sure there's nothing you want to tell me?" Phil inquired pleadingly giving him a chance to own up. Dan removed his eyes from the ground to stare at Phil. He was silent for a second, making Phil's heart pound hard enough that he could feel his pulse all over his body.
"Positive"
Dan hated lying but he was sure as hell not going to admit to his sin now. He couldn't bare to lose Phil now. The older man sighed in response, eyeing them both warily. He then dug a hand into his jacket pocket and pulled out his phone and unlocked it. Both Dan and the prostitute watched as Phil held his phone up to his ear but it was Dan who broke the silence
"What are doing, Phil?"
"Calling Louise"
"What?!" Dan stressed, running a worried hand through his hair as he protested how pointless that would be but Phil silenced him
"Well someone's lying to me and this is the only way I can think of to find out who" He pressed speakerphone button on to make sure they could all hear when she hopefully answered. Dan panicking, wrapped his arms tightly around himself to cover up from the chill of the evening arm and said a silent prayer in his head that Louise would not pick up.
Ring ring
'Don't pick up'
Ring ring
'Please don't pick up'
Ring r-
"Hello?"
'Shit' He was well and truly fucked now. Unless Louise covered for him again.
Unfortunately he hadn't counted on what Phil would say.
"Hey Louise sorry to bother you but er...It's about Dan" Phil started his voice beginning to tremble slightly
"It's no bother, Phil. What's up with Dan?" God. Dan could practically hear the smile in her voice. It felt too surreal for her not to notice something was wrong.
Phil paused, thinking carefully over what he would say next. His eyes locked with Dan's as he spoke
"I know. About what he did with that woman" The line went silent as both him and Dan held their breathes.
'Come one Louise!' Dan pleaded in his mind 'Don't say anything! Or act oblivious at the very least!'
The agonizing silence continued until finally...
"...I'm so sorry Phil..."
'Fuck.'
Phil instantly squeezed his eyes shut and placed a hand to his mouth to stifle a sob. He took a shuddering breath as he tried not to cry out in the middle of the street. He ended the call not needing to hear anymore from Louise and placed his phone back inside his jacket. He bit his lip, keeping his eyes shut and hoping this was all just a dream he could wake up from any second.
Dan's heart was in his throat as he desperately looked towards Phil who was avoiding eye contact by keeping them closed. He felt himself on edge as he cautiously approached Phil's slightly shaking body, trying to catch his attention as he gently spoke
"Phil?"
"You lied to me" Phil mumbled inaudibly, still not looking up.
"What?" Dan inquired tilting his head to the side.
"I said" Phil began more clearly, looking up and glaring "You lied to me!" The rage in his eyes was evident and Dan almost flinched from seeing it. He wasn't use to seeing Phil angry, Phil was always the happy go lucky one who hardly ever got upset or irritated at anything. He looked away from Phil briefly and looked back beseechingly, attempting to stutter out an explanation
"Please Phil! I-I can explain!" Dan began helplessly. Phil clenched his jaw angrily and folded his arms, waiting for Dan too continue whilst giving nothing away apart from the silent tears falling from his eyes. Dan swallowed before carrying on
"You-We weren't talking and I-...I was so confused! You just told me how you felt and I didn't know what to say or do!"
"Oh, so you thought you would get the answer by going out and sleeping with a prostitute?" Phil replied bitterly
"Of course not! I wasn't thinking!"
"Obviously."
Dan frustratedly sighed and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. Opening his eyes he saw Phil had wiped his eyes and was now full on glaring at him.
"Phil..."
"Any other excuses you want to give me?"
"I was drunk?" He offered weakly causing Phil to just shake his head in disgust at him.
"You're pathetic" And with that Phil turned and began to walk down the street. Dan remained frozen to the spot for a moment before walking quickly to catch up to Phil. He reached out a hand to grab his shoulder
"Phil! Wait a sec-"
The resounding crack of Phil's slap echoed throughout the empty street.
The sheer force Phil had put behind it sent Dan to the floor. He groaned from the explosion of pain in his left cheek then quickly turned so he was facing Phil who was glaring down at him, tears streaming down his face once more.
"Don't fucking touch me" Phil practically spat at the younger man. He turned on his heel and walked quickly in the opposite direction and out of sight.
Dan remained motionless, still in shock. He had well and truly messed everything up now. He raised a hand to his stinging cheek which was nothing compared to the heartbreak he was feeling over the way Phil had looked at him, like he was a piece of trash. He deserved this pain though. Gradually he got to his feet and gingerly brushed his suit down. The blue eyed woman who had watched the whole affair unfold began to move towards Dan and spoke cautiously
"Are you okay? That looked like it hurt" Dan pointedly ignored her and took his phone from his jacket and began dialling the number for a cab.
"Hey! Don't ignore me, I only asked you a ques-"
"Don't you think you've caused enough damage?!" Dan yelled at her. She looked shocked for a second before glowering at him
"You're the one who fucked up here. I just did my job."
And in a way she was right. She had gone and done what she did to earn her money and Dan, being the weak person he was, just gave in to her advances. It didn't, however, stop him being pissed at her.
"Fuck you" He said as calmly as he possibly could before turning to completely blank her out. Pressing an ear to his phone he ordered a taxi to pick him up and take him home. Hopefully he would be able to talk Phil into forgiving him. Somehow...
After calling the taxi firm he closed his eyes as his thoughts consumed him. The woman stared at him for a good few minutes before attempting to hit on him again.
"You know..." The prostitute began sliding discreetly towards Dan "I'm still working for the next few hours...I could help you to...Relieve some of your emotional stress. For a price of course."
Damn if he wasn't tempted. He was, after all, a human being with needs and after the shit he had just been through he could use some stress relief.
However unlike last time, he didn't have the stupid influence of alcohol in his system to lessen his thinking filter. He glared at her and she held up her hands backing away.
"Can't blame a girl for trying" He glared harder
"I can and will"
She smirked slightly and turned, walking away. She raised a hand to gesture her departure and called out
"If you change your mind you have my number" He groaned at her response and leaned against the brick wall behind him. Pulling out his phone once more, he plugged in his headphones and clicked shuffle on his playlist whilst he waited. He tapped his feet to the beat of the song as he let the events of the night catch up to his aching head and body
Maybe I should cut my wrists
you know I've never been fucked like this
You rip my heart apart
you know who you are
He buried his hands in his hair and cried out in frustration
You're a god damn liar
You're a god damn liar
I don't wanna care
like I wanna care
His chest began to close up and he struggled to breathe due to his body wracking sobs taking most of his breath away.
You're a god damn liar
you're a god damn liar
I don't wanna care
like I wanna care
He hated how songs could do that sometimes. Literally speak to you as if they had been recorded just for you in that moment. It was impressive really...But also fucking annoying. Fortunately the taxi had arrived and pulled up next to the pavement. Practically ripping his earphones out of his ears he shoved his phone hastily back into his jacket and clambered into the back of the car. Dan gave his address (after some inquiries from the driver as to if he was okay) and gazed out the window dreading arriving home. Eventually he closed his eyes, exhaustedly and whispered out loud
"Phil..."
...
Back at the flat, Phil hurried into his room, slamming the door shut and locking it firmly. He was emotionless for a few moments before sliding to the floor, back pressed against the door as he breathed deeply.
Dan had cheated on him.
Well technically he hadn't cheated on him exactly. They weren't actually together at the time. It still hurt though. It hurt like hell.
Phil might have forgiven him if Dan hadn't constantly lied to him. He could have told him straight after it had happened. Sure, he would've been sad. Angry even. But it was better than finding out like this that the person you loved reacting so badly to your confession that he had to go out, get drunk then sleep with someone else and then LIE point blank for ages about it until said person he slept with tells you after offering herself to them both. God his life sounded like some cheesy story written by a teenage girl with angst problems.(Awesomely breaking the fourth wall...Sorry)
But there was another question bugging Phil that he didn't really want to confront
'What else has he lied about?' Phil just felt like he couldn't trust Dan anymore. Even when they were nothing more than friends, they always had a strict no lying policy. It wasn't a written rule or anything but they just knew that, no matter what, they could tell each other anything, from a bad dream Phil had to the dark thoughts Dan suffered during his existential crisis periods. But now Phil was beginning to doubt everything about Dan.
He couldn't cry. He cried the whole way home and was out of tears by this point. The only emotion which seemed to leak out of his heart now was raw anger. He clenched his fists tightly as his body began to shake violently with suppressed rage.
He wanted-
No. He NEEDED to hit something. Now.
Standing abruptly, his eyes quickly searched the room for something he could hit or throw about or SOMETHING that wouldn't break and hurt him. Finally he just decided to kick the wall a few times (hurting his foot) and then violently punch and throw his pillows around the room. After a tiring tens minutes of soft violence, and the occasional angry yell into the pillow he almost destroyed, he led on his bed panting. Exhausted out, Phil just lay there for an unmeasurable amount of time, allowing the empty sadness to devour him once again. He hated this. He hated feeling like this so much.
But despite everything...
He looked towards his door, holding his breath as he thought he heard the front door. After a minute however it became apparent that it was just his imagination.
...He still loved Dan.
He smiled bitterly at the irony of not being able to hate the one you love. But honesty...All Phil wanted was him here in his arms. He wanted to wake up from this nightmare and for Dan to tell him this was all a dream and none of it was real and that he loved him and would kiss him...But this was reality, and all of this happened.
Sighing heavily he rolled off his bed and onto his feet. He needed something to do to occupy his mind from this heart wrenching thought process. Moving around his room aimlessly he began to move things around his room, hiding that which reminded him of Dan too much and just fumbling with others just out of the sheer need to distract himself. Picking up the clothes he had changed out of from before he watched as a piece of paper slipped from his jeans back pocket and onto the floor. Frowning he bent down to retrieve it but dropped it instantly upon the realisation of what it was. The note. HER note.
Swallowing harshly, he picked the note up once again, re-reading what he could and mentally slapping himself due to his obliviousness. As he began to scrunch the paper into a ball, a thought suddenly came to Phil. Opening the note, he looked at the number, conflicted before reaching into his jacket and pulling his phone out. He called a hotel and rented a room for the next few days as he really didn't want to face Dan right now. Afterwards, biting his lip, he entered the number on the note into his phone and quickly typed out a text;
Hey, it's Dan
Your offer still on the table?
Meet me tomorrow at Chancellors hotel
Tomorrow 8pm, Room 12
He couldn't trust Dan to be honest with him anymore so he decided he would get the answers he needed from the source of Dan's deceit.
Well, what a mood swing Handsome ;)
I'll be there. Don't forget your wallet though
I cost a pretty penny
as I'm sure you remember xxx
He glared at her response before slipping his phone back into his pocket. Grabbing a rucksack out of his wardrobe he started packing it with about a weeks worth of supplies and zipped it up tightly. Hopefully he could finally get some answers.
Swinging the bag over his shoulder, Phil made his way towards the front door but paused when he gripped the front door handle. Dropping the bag in front of the door for a seconds, he hurried into their office room and grabbed some paper and a pen. He scribbled a quick note down for Dan and stuck it on his bedroom door, knowing that would be where Dan went to look for him first. He grabbed his bag and quickly left, locking the door behind him.
Dan,
I need some time away to think
Don't call me or anything...I just can't look or talk to you right now
I am sorry about hitting you though...
Phil
AN: Well what an emotional roller coaster...This chapter is a tad later than I expected it to be (I was going through so much crap this week but I had an amazing best friend whose helped me through it :) I'm sure she'll review and see this so THANK YOU AND HI! XD ) Reviews make my world go round so please do! WHAT'S PHIL GOING TO SAY...OR DO TO THE PROSTITUTE WHEN HE MEETS HER? WILL DAN AND PHIL OFFICIALLY SPLIT UP? WHO KNOWS...STAY TUNED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER! :D