Peeta...
I walk through town with Delly chatting about her brother and the new home they had been allocated. Delly has been my friend since childhood. I have great respect for her and I am thankful she helped me through some of the harder times in District 13, after the hijacking. Especially when she was still grieving for her own parents. Her dad used to bring Delly to our house and we would play while he drank scotch and played a game called dominoes with my father. We would play games of hide n seek, or pretend the floor was water infested with deadly creatures to entertain ourselves. On days when we were feeling particularly brave and thought my mother wouldn't notice, we would sneak into the bakery and eat frosting until we felt sick. We had no concept of rationing or value; we just wanted a sweet treat. I smiled at this memory.
"What?" Asked Delly.
"Do you remember when we used to sneak into the bakery and eat the frosting with our fingers til we felt sick?"
Delly lit up at this, "Yes! I always wondered how your mother never found us out."
"I think my father covered for us." I frown, my father. As passive and caring as he was, he was never truly happy in his marriage. Always trying to hide things from my mother so she wouldn't get angry and lash out. I may never know what made her that way. At least I know my father loved me. Us, my brothers and I, in his own way.
"How is Katniss?" Asks Delly, interrupting my thoughts.
"She's doing okay, I've been teaching her to bake."
"Just bake?" There's a hint of teasing in her voice.
"Yes Delly, just bake."
"Because there's a certain rumour going around that someone no longer sleeps at her house at night."
"There is? I cannot confirm or deny these rumours. But better not let Katniss here or I'm back to where I started."
Delly laughs at this then suddenly serious says, "You know Peeta, you are still a teenager. You should both be out of that house doing things people our age do."
"Most people out age haven't been through two shots at the hunger games and a war, plus a hijacking, post traumatic stress and depression." I answer rather harshly.
"I know but how do you ever expect to get past these terrible things and help Katniss move on if you don't start living life amongst people again and doing things that regular couples do."
"We're not even a couple, just two people trying to make things easier getting by together."
"I know Katniss would never say, she's not your typical girl. But maybe she needs reminding that she's a woman and you are a man...that sounds ridiculous when I say it out loud but I think you know what I mean."
"What do you suggest?"
"I don't know, be romantic. Make it spontaneous. Surprise her."
I thought this over. Spontaneity, isn't that what I did the night I went to her house at 3am. It had worked. We were now back to our safe routine of comforting one another.
"What if she runs off or worse, rejects me and goes back to avoiding me. I'm trying to be patient."
"Patience only gets you so far. Besides, personally speaking, I don't think you have to worry about Katniss going anywhere…oh there's Thom…"
I vaguely remember Katniss telling me something, no whispering about Delly and Thom. Someone was mooning? The memory is vague. I wave and call Thom over and Delly turns a deep shade of what can only be described as puce. Guess it was Delly who was mooning, this could be fun.
"Thom, have you met Delly?"
"Not formally," he shakes her hand and she glares at me through her blonde curls. She could almost be related to me.
"Delly and I were just talking about things to do now that we are back in District 12. You should join Katniss and I for dinner sometime, and you too of course Delly." I add, she looks so awkward now. I almost feel bad. I know that with Gale gone and I haven't seen Bristel around, Thom might be looking for company like the rest of us.
"That sounds good, I might have to take you up on that offer."
"Delly was also saying that you have been doing a great job clearing the ruins and organising the reconstruction."
"I...thanks," Thom beamed at Delly. "I'm just trying to do my bit, find my place back here. I figured since the mines are closed I would try construction. There's talk of some farms being set up and expansion beyond the fence. If construction doesn't work out I was thinking I would try that next."
Thom and I talk for a while longer, he tells me that they are accepting registrations for new businesses in the rebuilt mayors office. He takes care to mention that there are no bakers registered so far. I had been considering this for a while now, taking over the family business in District 12. I love to bake and frost cakes and I'm not sure what else I would do for a living. At the current time we still receive Victor's funds from the Capitol, but with all the changes in the government who's to say that will continue. I know I can't rely on it forever, not that I want to anyway. I'd need to think of a way to provide for Katniss and I in the future. Now there's something I never thought in a million years I would be thinking.
I thank Thom and tell him I will get in touch with him to make arrangements for dinner. Delly and I walk further into town, she's talking about how interesting Thom's work is but all I am thinking about now is getting back to Katniss. I pick up ingredients and say goodbye to Delly.
On the way through the newly rebuilt town square I decide to go into the mayors office and ask for the registration documents for work. A female clerk, aged around fifty, grins at me as I ask for the paper work.
"Peeta Mellark," she says, "I had wondered if you might show up here or in a fancy job in the Capitol"
"No, no. District 12 is where the heart is." Literally, I think. I smile at her and she hands the documents over. I decide not to think about it any longer and sit in the waiting room to complete the forms. I carefully write out my intentions for bringing business into District 12. The rest of the form asks about finance information and capitol. I have some savings from the games. I have nothing left over from my parents. There were no banks in District 12; everything was kept within the home. I think I should have enough to start up, however there's a form at the bank involving Capitol grants for those contributing to the regrowth of the districts and economy. I decide it's probably safer to complete this and remind myself to read up on about financial matters, maybe there's someone who can advise me.
I return home to find Haymitch sitting on my porch, he smells stale.
"You should take a bath," I say, sitting down on the steps beside him.
"I had a bath, the geese tripped me up and I landed in my liquor."
"I can tell. Have you eaten?"
"Katniss left me breakfast before she went hunting. How's the town looking?"
"Good, I registered for the bakery."
"Good on you kid, good on you." Haymitch takes a swig from a clear jar. I wish he would stop drinking, but how do you convince someone to stop when they have lost everyone they love. I know Haymitch's drinking is just to get him through the days and nights. I wish I could do something for him.
"Do you know much about businesses? Economy and grants?" I ask.
Turns out, Haymitch is quite knowledgeable, having played a few card games with businessmen in the Capitol.
I can see Katniss heading towards us in the distance.
"Alright, I can see that lovesick look creeping up on you. I'll be off. Be sure to leave some dinner for me later."
As Katniss approaches he calls, "He's all yours sweetheart." And at that he heads back into his house and the door shuts with a bang.
"What's up with him?" she asks.
"He said he wanted to sleep til dinner," I lie, not quite wanting to tell her he accused me of looking lovesick. "How was the hunt?"
"Terrible, there are people there now. Also trying to hunt. Scaring off my game."
"I see how that could be a problem," I grin and nod, indicating at her game bag which appears to be bursting at the seam.
"Well I have been doing it longer." She smiles, she's so beautiful when she's relaxed and on her own terms after hunting.
"Delly asked after you and I got the ingredients for cookies." I tell her. She sits and cleans the games on the bottom of the steps and I regale her with the account of Delly and Thom and inviting them for dinner. I casually add that I registered for a job at the end of this.
"You did? Peeta that's great! I don't think anyone else would be worthy of the task. Especially if they taste your cheese buns." The compliment pleases me.
"Have you thought about it?"
"About what?" she asks whilst skinning a rabbit.
"Getting a job? Or what you want to do with your future?"
"I don't know." She goes quiet and I am at a loss for what to say next.
"I always feared the future. I've never thought about having a job. I've only ever hunted for food and I could never imagine working in an office. I'm not good with medicine or healing like…my mother."
"Maybe you can raise geese with Haymitch."
This makes her grin and she flicks something red and fleshy at me.
"I find it amusing that you hate blood, pus and guts from humans, but you are happy to sit there and gut animals. Maybe you should register as the District 12 butcher."
"Not likely, I'd rather raise the geese."
"You could work with me."
"Burning bread and scaring off your customers?" her tone is light.
"We can work on your poor customer relations, besides you can be quite lovely when you want to be."
She turns slightly and dips her head. I have caught her doing this on more than one occasion when I compliment her. It's brief, but I like this slightly shy version of Katniss.
"I won't be winning any contests." She says.
Later Greasy Sae makes us dinner and takes the rest of the game home. She even delivers a plate to Haymitch.
We decide not to work on the memory book and instead I sketch Katniss as she plays with Buttercup and a ball of yarn by the fire.
I'm already yawning when we head upstairs to bed. Neither of us goes without the other in tow, not even to wait. Katniss gets ready for bed in the bathroom and I use the bedroom. I relieve myself of my prosthetic and climb in between the blankets and sheets. When Katniss emerges from the bathroom she's wearing a thin nightgown and her hair is loose. I try to distract myself by looking out the window at the dark sky. She climbs into the bed and assumes her usual position, lying against my chest. I put my arms around her and hold her close. We both drift off without a word.
I'm half sleeping, half awake when I feel Katniss thrashing around, screaming my name. Within seconds I am fully alert, grabbing her arms to her sides and trying to break her from the dream. She's gasping for breath and there are tears on her face. She looks petrified.
"Katniss, Katniss, it's okay, I'm here," I soothe.
"Peeta? I dreamt you were dead, I'd lost you." She chokes back sobs and presses her face into my chest.
"No, I'm here."
Katniss runs her hands over my face, like she doesn't believe me.
"I left you in the arena and they killed you." She began to cry again, hiccoughing into my shirt.
"Shhhh no, its okay. I'm here." I kiss her forehead and stroke her arm, holding her tighter. She squirms and I release her, she turns her face to mine.
"It felt so real, I couldn't stand it if you died Peeta." She looks so defeated right now.
"I'm not going anywhere," I say. And I kiss her. Slowly at first, then she pushes into me and the kisses become more desperate. Its heated and I want more. She's lying on top of me, her hands have moved to my arms and she's gripping my biceps almost holding me down. Does she realise I have no intention of moving? I run my hands down to the small of her back and she whimpers. She releases her hold on my arms and pulls away gasping for breath.
"Katniss?"
"I'm sorry. I..." But before she can cast any doubt over what just happened I bring her lips back to mine and we resume the hot kisses that I have been craving for so long. Like the kiss on the beach of the Quarter Quell or that kiss in the Capitol before the bomb…
We stay like this for what feels like hours, kissing. No talking, just our lips clashing. I think my brothers once said this was called 'making out'. I don't care what it's called. I intend on savouring every moment.
Katniss eventually breaks away, "Peeta, my lips are dry and I need to get some water." I grin and release her.
When she returns to bed to my disappointment she does not resume the kissing. She lies beside me and strokes my hair and traces her fingers over my shoulder and down my arm. I am unbelievably aroused but I don't want to draw attention to that so I lie facing her on my side with my good leg bent slightly forward. We stare at each other, neither of us sure what to say.
"What are you thinking about?" She asks.
I'm not sure I should tell her what I'm really thinking. "About you."
"What about me?"
"That I could kiss you every day for the rest of my life and never tire of it"
She smiles but there's something different about it, her pupils seem larger and her head is tilted.
"What are you thinking about?" I ask hoping it's an answer that involves us kissing some more.
"Nothing," She says this in a way that implies that she is absolutely not thinking about nothing and there's something on her mind. Once again Katniss Everdeen you have me hooked.
There is more kissing after that, just gentle kisses and holding each other til the early hours of dawn when we are so exhausted we fall asleep again.