A/N: So I thought I'd posted this already this week because I've had it written since Wednesday; but clearly not, so here you go!
Emily's eyes shot open to be greeted by the same dark room she'd quickly gotten used to waking up in a cold sweat in. Those same machines were beeping. That same clock ticking on the wall. The same scratchy sheets and the same damn hospital gown that took great joy in showing her ass to the whole world.
She'd only been awake for a day. Not even that in fact, she'd woken up early in the afternoon, and now it was 4am. But what with the heavy medication, she'd been asleep most of the time, especially after they upped the dose after she'd seen Taylor and no-one could calm her down.
She'd never felt so alone in her life. Her girlfriend was lying in the same position down the hall and she couldn't find the strength in her weak body to just get up and walk the few paces to see her.
The couch in the room lay empty. According to JJ, Derek had slept in the room with her at night for the first seven days of the ten she was out cold, until a Doctor who wasn't in on the secret found out and banned the action, what with it being 'against hospital policy' and all. Only right at this moment, despite how alone she felt, Emily couldn't decide if having Derek in the same room would be a comfort or would merely fuel her panic.
A part of her knew it was irrational; Derek hadn't hurt her. Hotch hadn't hurt her. Dave hadn't hurt her. Spencer hadn't hurt her. ...And yet she didn't want them anywhere near her. She flinched at JJ's touch as it was, how was she going to explain why she was so jumpy to a group of profilers without them figuring out the real reason why?
JJ was safe, she wouldn't ask, she'd just channel her maternal instincts and ignore how she moved away from anyone's touch. Only she knew her partner, and Derek would ask, and she knew that he'd immediately figure out what happened in that basement, on that floor... on that stained mattress... And she didn't think she could handle the hurt that would undoubtedly be seen in his eyes. And Hotch's, and Dave's, and yes, even Spencer's.
How was she supposed to explain what happened when she couldn't even understand it herself? When she couldn't even say the word out loud to herself, let alone to her family?
It took a few minutes for Emily to even register the tears tracking down her cheeks, soaking the pillow beneath her, what with one question suddenly shouting for attention in her mind:
What did he do to Taylor?
'So what's the plan?' Derek directed the question on everyone's mind towards Hotch, which resulted in five pairs of expectant eyes looking towards their leader for answers.
'I think we should send Garcia in with JJ first, because we know she's okay with JJ, and if that goes well they can ask her if we can all go in to see her. We don't want to push her into anything, and we certainly don't want any healing that may have already taken place in her mind to be unravelled by us overwhelming her too soon.' With his team seemingly satisfied with that answer, Hotch took a seat, quickly mirrored by Rossi, Morgan and Reid, while JJ and Garcia headed towards Emily's room.
Stopping briefly outside JJ turned to her friend 'just take it easy okay Pen, don't go full PG on her'
'I'll try Jayje'
Satisfied, JJ pushed open the door and the two women went to try and establish just how much of their best friend was present in the room.
'Hey' JJ smiled brightly as she walked in, hoping for more of a response than she'd received the day before. The two women were greeted by the sight of Emily sitting up in bed, propped upright by various pillows, and currently fighting a losing battle against the pain in her body to bring a spoonful of jell-o up to her mouth.
'Hi' came the quiet response muffled by a mouthful of jelly and general avoiding techniques on Emily's part. She tried to smile at her best friends, but she could tell from the reaction of Garcia that it wasn't convincing in the slightest.
'Emily Elizabeth Prentiss. I have one issue and one issue only to talk to you about' Garcia announced before proceeding to sit on the edge of the hospital bed to make sure she had the brunette's full attention. Ignoring the way Emily had flinched at the contact, Garcia grabbed hold of her hand and looked into her eyes. 'Why on Earth would you not tell us about Taylor? I had to go through your phones and laptops; and much as I hated doing that, I learned that she's smart. And beautiful. And brave. And sexy as hell...'
'She is all of those things-' Emily cut her off, putting her jell-o on the table in front of her before meeting Garcia's eyes with her own tear-filled ones. '-but she's also a she. ...and I've not exactly had good reactions to that in the past. Plus the longer you guys didn't know, the longer I was worried about telling you because it would be like I'd been obviously lying to you all'
'But we don't care! I know I don't! I don't care that you're gay, or a lesbian, or however you want to word it! You're still Emily. You're just Emily with a sexy doctor girlfriend'
'...If she wakes up' Emily whispered, abruptly ending the eye contact and pulling her hand away.
'Hey.' Garcia grabbed either side of Emily's face, forcing her to look at her. 'She's gonna wake up. You did. And besides, if god forbid she doesn't, she'll go knowing just how much you love her'
'How Garcia?' Tears were flowing down her face now, and JJ had to take a seat, not quite believing that for the second time in as many days Emily Prentiss, the master of hiding her emotions was once again breaking down before her very eyes. 'It's my fault she was in that situation in the first place. She's gonna die knowing I killed her'
'I heard it all Emily. He had that God damn camera streaming live. I watched how you refused to let her give up. How she told you she loved you and how you said it back. How you kissed her like it was the last time. How you took a bullet for her. ...Emily c'mon. She was screaming your name you know? She was terrified she'd lost you. She's gonna wake up Em. That's not going to be your last kiss, you're going to have mind-blowing make-up sex. You know how I know that? Because you wouldn't let her give up when she was bleeding out on that floor. The last thing she saw in that room was you with a bullet in your chest, and it's her turn to make sure you don't give up.'
After calming Emily down somewhat, about an hour later JJ let the rest of the team into her room. As they filed in, Emily visibly flinched at the sudden crowding. Her hospital room was spacious and bright - the perks of a good credit score - yet when the whole team surrounded her Emily felt claustrophobia like she had never experienced before.
After about half an hour of trying to initiate conversation with their saved teammate to no avail; the team made their excuses to leave, with Hotch deciding that maybe sticking with the ease-her-back-in-slowly-approach may be the best course of action.
'Hey princess' Derek walked in, following JJ making an excuse about going to find coffee, and therefore leaving Emily unaccompanied.
'Hi' a completely unfamiliar voice replied to him. She sounded scared, tired, broken even.
'So talk to me, how did you pull a sexy doctor? I mean I've seen her, and damn Emily. So come on, what's the secret?' Derek deployed full on Derek Morgan charm-mode complete with a lopsided grin and raised eyebrows.
As Emily chuckled, Derek's only thought was that that sound was the sweetest music to his ears he'd ever heard.
'You know somehow I knew you'd react like that to her Derek.' A ghost of a genuine smile graced her lips.
'Hey, I just call it how I see it, and trust me, you're my new wing-woman'
'Well you'll have to wait til I'm out of this damn hospital first' Emily grumbled.
'Oh that's fine, we can have fun here first anyway, you know how I love pushing you around Princess' Derek grinned at the reference.
'Well, seems as you love it so much, will you push me round to Taylor's room?' Emily met his eyes for the first time for more than a few seconds and Derek was shocked at what he saw. Her defences were so completely destroyed that clear as day he could see worry, fear and panic swirling around in the chocolatey orbs before him.
'I will princess, I promise, but we need to talk first' Derek reached out and gently took her hand in his. He saw how her whole body stiffened, and the worry swirling in her eyes dropped away, leaving only fear and panic. 'I'm not gonna hurt you Em. I'd never hurt you' it broke his heart to think she thought he might.
'I know, but that's not helping right now' Emily whispered back, forcing herself to meet his eyes and display some kind of reassurance on her face.
'I need you to know something Em. I know you don't want us to find out something, but I need you to know that we know. We know what he did to you baby.'
'I don't know what you're talking about Derek'
Derek braced himself for the explosion to come. 'We know he raped you Emily...'
Nothing. No explosion. Only Derek wished there had been one, because rather than have his best friend scream at him, something altogether more devastating happened. Emily simply pulled her hand from his grasp, turned her head away from him so she was facing the wall, and whispered two words that ripped his heart out of his chest.
'Get out.'
A/N: Sorry again for the wait! So... I had to change one word in the last chapter from 'blue' to 'hazel' because Taylor's eyes blatantly aren't blue. And speaking of; there'll be more Taylor in the next chapter I promise! I had to get up Emily/Team first though.
The review button down there looks lonely… ;)