Chapter Sixty Seven

Jasper

At first I thought Bella had sailed through her transformation and was both delighted and relieved but after a few days I felt the first stirrings of unease. We had been to hunt, swimming to the mainland to find animals for Bella to track and when we got back we went through our usual routine, showering, sex, then showering again, and as we got out of the shower for the second time Bella halted me with one hand, tracing one of my scars with the fingers of the other.

"Some of these look fresh."

I nodded,

"A gift from Maria and Nathan but it doesn't matter, there are so many that a few more don't make any difference."

"They do to me,. Every one caused you pain."

"Well if you're thinking of revenge I would forget it, the people responsible are all dead, most at my hands and the principals at Aro's. Let it go Bella. There's no point in worrying over things you can't change."

She nodded her head but I could see I hadn't persuaded her and later as we lay together watching the beautiful sunset I saw her biting her lip thoughtfully as she traced the pattern of scars along one arm.

"Are you OK Bella?"

She began to nod then changed it to a shake of her head, got up and ran off so I followed only to find her on the beach pounding a rock to pieces with her fists.

"Bella? What's wrong darlin'?"

Bella

How could I have been so blind? So stupid as to forget all that had happened? I had been so wrapped up in myself and then my dad and I'd hardly given a thought to my mate, to all he'd been through. He and my dad were quick to take revenge on those who had threatened and harmed me but I had totally ignored all he'd been through, how this all started and I was furious with myself. I had been so happy, deliriously so and now...now I wanted to kick myself, to destroy something.

The one who had started all this, caused Jasper to return to Mexico where he was tortured for my sake, caused my kidnap and imprisonment in Volterra, well they were walking around full of happiness and joy having found all they wanted in life. I tried to forget about it understanding there would be repercussions if I acted but it haunted me day and night, the guilt I felt at my inaction.

I knew Jasper sensed there was something wrong but I think he hoped it was just a part of being a newborn and maybe it was. Maybe the white hot rage that was building in my gut was born of my status as a new vampire but that didn't make it any easier to deal with or to control. If he knew why he would try to reason with me, stop me even, and that would only drive a wedge between us. No, I needed an impartial listener so I rang Marcus. He was surprised to hear from me but agreed to listen to my problem and advise if he could.

Marcus

When Bella put the phone down I knew she was still unhappy and in truth I couldn't blame her, sure I would feel the same in her place. The trouble was that to take her revenge meant hurting her father, the one person she loved most apart from The Major. She explained everything to me and I could understand her anger but I had to point out that killing Tanya wasn't an option, if she did that then she would be killing her father too.

However doing nothing wasn't an option either, the rage would only continue to build until eventually she would explode and the results might be even more dangerous to all around her. I suggested she explain her feelings to The Major, after all he was the best qualified to calm her but I could hear in her voice that she wouldn't do that. If I warned Charlie and Tanya then I would be breaking a confidence and that I couldn't do. Bella had to find a way to get her revenge without killing her enemy.

Jasper

Bella seemed calmer after she spoke on the phone although she clearly didn't want to talk about the call, not even who she had been speaking to. I tried to broach the subject but got nowhere. Bella just changed the subject so all I could do was monitor her emotions and be there for her. The day we returned from Isle Esme to the Cullens we received an invitation to join the Denalis for a celebration,

Irina had finally found a mate. I thought Bella would be pleased at the opportunity to see Charlie again but for a moment I thought she was going to decline. In the end she agreed and suddenly she felt much calmer. Thinking back to our conversations, my scars, and her strange emotions it struck me that she had been feeling angry for the way Tanya had been the one to start the chain of events that culminated in her father becoming a vampire and rescuing her from Aro.

I guessed she had been working through it all, after all her hands were tied, Tanya was her father's mate and she knew that anything she did to Tanya would also hurt Charlie and she loved her father. She had spoken to someone who seemed to get through to her, she'd been much calmer after the call so all I could do was pray that whatever had been said had eased Bella's antipathy towards her father's mate. She must have thought about the invitation and decided she could control her feelings before agreeing to visit Denali.

Bella

I had considered refusing the invitation but if I did that, if I were too scared to face my enemy, then I was a coward. I wouldn't kill Tanya, I loved my father too much for that to be an option but if she thought I was about to be warm and welcoming she was badly mistaken, vengeance would be mine, one way or another. Once I had decided I felt much calmer and I knew Jasper was relieved at my softening attitude, if only he knew it wasn't because I had decided to let sleeping dogs lie, no, it was that I had decided on my method of revenge. I would apologize to my dad afterwards and hope he accepted but if not then it would be too bad and Jasper and I would go on alone but at least I would have the satisfaction of enjoying the look on her face.

Esme and Rose cornered me the day before we left and I could tell they had been put up to it by Jasper who had probably spoken to Carlisle about his suspicions.

"Bella, how are you finding your new life?"

"Much like the old but better. I'm just glad I have Jasper and that my dad survived and I'll never have to lose him again."

"Yes Charlie seems to have taken to his new life very well. I understand he is enjoying his work in Volterra. Are you looking forward to seeing them in Denali?"

"I always look forward to seeing my dad. I didn't see enough of him as I grew up."

"And Tanya? What about her? It must seem strange to see your dad with another woman."

"Oh I don't know, she's not that different from my mother in some ways."

They looked at each other but I didn't give them time to question me, instead joining a conversation between Edward and Emmett about a computer game they were trying out.