Chapter 23
Girl Advice

Oh... Is the only thing I can think of, right now. I look at the door in disbelief. He was serious.

.xx.

On Wednesday, I'm having my first test. Chemistry test. Shauna gave me some of her old Chemistry tests, since Zeke gave his to Uriah and she had Mrs. Matthews as her teacher in Junior year as well. I've been studying a lot because from what I saw, they are not easy. I've been studying so much Chemistry, that I'm getting behind on the other subjects. Specially History. I really need to catch up on that.

I am currently in Uriah's dorm, we are studying Chemistry together.

"Can we take a break?" He asks, after we finish exercise number seven.

"Sure." I say and sit on his bed. He was sat on the chair, next to the desk. And since there is only one chair, I was on the bed.

He opens a drawer, his food drawer, and takes out a pack of cookies. We had dinner an hour ago.

"Is that hygienic?" I ask.

He shrugs. "I hope so." He says and takes a bite of one of the cookies. "You want one?"

I shake my head no and say, "I'm too nervous to eat."

"I eat when I'm nervous... Hey, hm, Tris?" He calls, sounding a little too nervous.

"Yes?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure." I grin, hoping that smiling helps him getting less nervous.

He cleans his hands to his jeans and fixes his hair.

"Girls... No. Hm. Okay, what do you consider romantic and going too far? On, you know, that subject."

I feel a hysterical laugh growing in the pit of my stomach, waiting for my hint to come out, but I keep it there when I realize he his serious. He is not asking me on advice, is he? Because that would be completely useless.

"I'm not the girl you should ask that." I say honestly. I could make up something, and try to help him, but the thing is... I don't even know what to made up. I've never been on a date, and I've never even had a boyfriend before. It would be stupid of me to advise him, specially when I don't know what I'm talking about.

"But you are. You are the girl I need to ask." He says. "You are not the usual, typical girl. You're not the kind of girl you see on movies or series. You're different. You are real. And I want to hear you opinion about this."

I think a bit before speaking again. I'm not real. I'm not a real girl. I'm just not that typical girl who loves everything typical girls love, like flowers, make up, butterflies or unicorns or whatever they are supposed to like. But that doesn't make me real. I even think it makes me... weird.

"Look, Uriah, I... I don't know. I'm really not the girl you should or need to as-"

"You are. I need to know what a real girl expects when it comes to dates and... Romance?" He shrugs.

I now realize that he knows about dates and romance as much as I do. And that's: Nothing.

"I'm sorry. I don't know. Talk to Christina or Marlene. I'm sure they'll say anything useful, like ask her out on the place you've met or something like that."

"I don't talk to Christina that much..." He says.

"I can talk to her, if you want to."

"No! No, no, no. I don't want you girls to talk about my insecurities."

Insecurities? He is serious about this. He looks like he is very sure of himself when it comes to flirting and all that, but the truth is that he has no idea of what he's doing and is just being himself. Maybe that is the best advice I can give him, even though everyone says it. Just be yourself. Maybe that we'll be enough. But I've done nothing more than being myself for sixteen years and I've never had a boyfriend. So, I should stay out of this.

"But why do you ask?" I ask him.

"I... You'll see."

I frown. "You asked me about girls. And dates. I think the least you could do is to tell me."

"You didn't actually advised me, did you?" He smirks. He is back to normal. Good. This is probably a mean thing to think, but I like him like this. Not when he is all nervous.

"That's true. But tell me anyway."

"You'll see, eventually."

"And if I don't?"

"Oh believe me. You will see." He says and throws the empty pack of cookies to the bin under the desk. "Let's continue studying. I still need to revise the chapter 2 of the book."

I lie on the bed again and open my book in the chapter 2. "Let's." I say.

.xx.

When I get back to my dorm after Uriah and I finish studying, I finish a report I had to do to English class and hop in the shower. And I don't know if it was for the chilled water, the fact that I was washing my hair or that I didn't have a chemistry nor a english book in front of me, but something clicked.

Was Uriah... He... Was he talking about me? He couldn't. He would never ask me on advice on... me. That would be silly. Wouldn't it?

I stood there, on the shower, the water running on me, looking at the wall for a bit.

"I'm back!" Christina yelled from the room, scaring me. Apparently, she was back.

Christina. For a couple of days now, she has filled me on her theories about Uriah liking me. She's just messing with my head. Isn't she? That's it. I need to ask her about him. I close my eyes hard. I can't. He asked me about... Those things. I couldn't talk with Christina about it. I recall Uriah telling me he didn't want girls - Christina and I - to be talking about his insecurities. He asked me about it, he told me about his insecurities, he trusted me. I can't tell her about it.

I finish washing myself, get out of the shower and put on my sleeping shorts and a big baggy shirt. I come out of the bathroom and I see Christina, lying on her bed, doing her homework.

"Something weird happened." She says.

"What?" I ask. I sit on my bed and tie my damp hair in a messy bun.

"Uriah sent Will to come talk to me." She tells me, still looking at her notebook.

"About what?" I say, trying to hide my surprised look.

"Girls." She says and looks at me. "He was all weird and asked me about places where boys shou-" She stops. "And you knew already."

I think about telling her I didn't have a clue about what she was talking about. But she would know I was lying. I'm a horrible liar. Specially around her.

"I might have heard about it... What did you told him?" I say. She eyes me suspiciously. "Oh, just tell me already."

"I told him that if Uriah wanted advice, he should come talk to me. He shouldn't send Will. Will might not have the doubts Uriah has." She pauses. "I bet it is about you." She points her mechanical pencil at me.

"It's not."

"How do you know?"

"I just do."

She gets up from her bed and sits on mine, next to me.

"You don't just know something."

"He might have asked me about that?"

"And what did you told him?"

"Nothing. Because I didn't knew what to say. I don't know a thing about love!"

"Love?!" She asks loudly.

"Not love. Dates, romance, that stuff."

"What did he said exactly?"

"I don't remember the whole thing. He said I was not a typical girl, that I was a real one, and he asked what do real girls expect when it comes to those things."

"Oh, he was totaly talking about you. I knew it. He likes you." She clapped her hands jumping up and down on the bed. "What did you told him?"

"Nothing."

"You must have told him something."

"I told him to talk to you and you might give him some advice like places to go and that."

"Places to go?"

I nod.

"What did you told him? Exact words."

I try to remember what I told him, because honestly, I'm so tired I can't even remember what dinner was.

"I told him to talk to you or Marlene, because you would tell him something useful like... Something about the place he and the girl he is interested in met."

"And where did you met?"

"Cafeteria." I say. "Oh, no, no. Uh, his dorm."

She smirks. "Did he told you anything else about that mysterious girl? I mean, you."

"No." I roll my eyes. "You need to finish your homework and I need to sleep. Good night." I say and lie on the bed, my head against the soft pillow.

"He's talking about you." She says, getting up.

"Good night." I tell her.

I choose not to tell her about he saying that I would know soon who the girl was. That would only make things worse.

What if he is really talking about me? What should I do? I... I don't like him in that way. I'm sure I don't.

If this happened a couple of weeks ago, I'd might even think about the chance of liking him. But now, with this whole... Weird thing, happening between Four and I... The ventilation room, the roof, the seven minutes in everything except heaven, ... With that whole thing, that chance isn't even possible. I don't know what's going on with Four and I. Or just between me and my thoughts about Four. But whatever it is, it makes my stomach spin each time I think about him. Like right now. But I know, that even though that's nothing, it can't be compared to what I feel around Uriah. Around Uriah, I feel normal. I think of him almost as a best friend. I couldn't think of him a anything else.

I now regret having this talk with Christina. He trusted me and told me he didn't want us to talk about that. And what did I do? I talked about it. With Christina. I'm an awful friend. In my defense, she knew I knew. I can't lie around her. But that doesn't make me less awful.