Chapter 10: Broken

*Logan's POV*

It's been a month. One fucking month. A month of self harm and hiding. A month of wishing to be dead. A month of needing to get out of life. One month, one fucking month. It's all changed. My body is littered with cuts and scars, and no one has a clue. I'm completely invisible. Not seen, not noticed, and not cared for. Not at all. I'm lucky we've had a month of work- it was nice of Gustavo. But we have to go back today, that's why I'm awake at 4.30am. I've had almost half an hour's sleep, I just can't sleep. I'm nervous, I'm scared, and every time I close my eyes the darkness seeps in and it doesn't leave.

*4 Hours Later*

I'm sitting eating cereal when the others walk in. I got out of bed at seven to get ready, after reading the whole of a book (I'm a quick reader). They look a mess. When did James get so thin? How could I have been so blind? We all look each other in the eyes, as if to say "We can't tell Gustavo". We don't talk about it anymore; we gave up with the meetings after the second week. It's been lonely barely talking to them, I miss them. There's no way we can tell anyone, especially not Gustavo- even though he organised what happened that is tearing us apart. Sort of, he took us to LA and he got that Doctor lady to assess us, but he can't take the blame entirely, we all blame ourselves somewhat.

"Wow, you lot look rough." Katie comments as she joins us for breakfast.

"Yeah, we were up playing video games, last night." Kendall lies, covering for all of us.

"Liar" She accuses. "I know you big brother. I'm not stupid. You're all crazy".

"We're not crazy, Katie." Carlos steps in.

"Err, yes you are. You're an alcoholic Carlos." The rest of us look shocked but luckily Mama Knight isn't here. "You guys didn't know? You thought I didn't know? It was pretty obvious, I found your empty bottles weeks ago, you're lucky that I didn't tell Mom. It's clear that the guys didn't know either. Well, obviously, James was too busy starving himself to even notice anyone else was on the planet." She continues, leaving shocked faces, once again.

"Ha. You lot didn't know. What great friends you all are." She says sarcastically. "My darling big brother, the one and only Kendall Knight..." She continues in the sarcastic tone, when she changes it to a more serious one. "...is doing drugs."

She takes a sip of her orange juice before continuing. "You guys should ask guitar dude, he'll tell you how much Kendall has smoked; he told me that Kendall likes weed the best."

I begin to silently pray that she hasn't noticed my problem, but she's sneaky, she'll know.

"Oh guess what guys, this one's the big shocker, Logan cuts himself. As it said in his diary, he 'deliberately drags a razor blade across his skin and waits for it to bleed, the more blood, the better.' Get yourselves together; you guys don't hide these things well. If you don't sort it out, I'm telling Mom." She finished up her rant and walks to the orange sofa and turns on the TV, loudly. I'm just glad Mama Knight was out for a jog, meaning that she didn't hear Katie's outburst of accusations.

We look at each other shocked, unsure of how to fix ourselves. We're broken. Broken beyond repair...