Hello everyone,
For no other reason than the simple fact that I want to update. That's the only reason for a bonus chapter.
Warnings: Nothing graphic for this chapter. Marley has one little accident, but I wasn't descriptive about it. I never am though. You can all envision your own version of an accident.
As always thanks for the support and encouragement from NayaFan, UnholyUnderBoob, and Beaner008.
I hope that all those who read this chapter enjoy it, and please feel free, as always, to PM or review to ask questions or get better descriptions. If I can PM you back, I will MOST DEFINITELY answer any questions you have to the best of my ability.
Be well everyone.
The next afternoon, Marley went to work with Santana and was very happy to see Susan. She gave her a hug and Susan commented on how lovely she looked in her white tank top and kelly green sweat pants. "Are you ready to come play with Nanny while Mommy goes to work?" she asked and Marley nodded.
"Mmm, before we do that, we need to get set up and have a discussion my lovely girl," Santana said and Marley turned and gave her an adorable pout. "Put the lip away. Just because we are at work, doesn't change the rules, and I want to make sure that you and Nanny Susan hear all the rules all at the same time," Santana said kindly.
Susan grinned and lead the two of them to the nursery and Marley immediately fell to her knees and crawled over to the book case and rocking chair. Nanny Susan always read to her, so she was going to pick out her books. "Marley honey, pick out your books and then come over here," Santana said kindly. Marley did as asked and very carefully was helped to her feet. "Now, what was the rule Mommy talked about before we left Miss Beth's house?" she asked her kindly.
"Food," Marley said looking very bored and annoyed by this conversation.
"Very good," Santana said keeping her patience, "and what did Mommy say would happen while she was working?"
"I eat," she said.
"And how much do you have to eat?"
"Two bites," she sassed.
"Watch the attitude Missy," Santana said sternly and then she looked to Susan. "Marley has a snack bag. It is small. There are only ten almonds in there. She has to eat all of them," Santana explained. "Marley look at Mommy," she said said seriously and she waited for Marley to focus in on her. "Where do you want to eat your snack?" she asked her and Marley pointed to the adult version of a kids picnic table. "Alright, that's fine with me, but you will go to the table at two thirty, and you will not leave until you are finished with all your almonds. This is not up for discussion Marley. I want you to sit at the table and eat all your almonds. All of them. Do you understand?" Santana asked her and she had on a very firm tone, something that was only recent. However, Marley had more of an attitude now, so they had grown together.
"Yes Mommy," she answered automatically and Santana smiled and shook her head.
"Come here my little love," she said pulling her little girl tighter into her arms. "I love you so much baby, do you know that?" she asked. Marley nodded automatically and Santana carefully took her face. "No my baby girl, I mean it, I love you, with everything I am. I am so proud of you and all your hard work and successes. You are an amazing person," she told her.
"Thank you Mommy," Marley said snuggling into her for a moment.
"That being said, I also mean the following. If you give Nanny Susan a hard time about eating, she has my full permission to give you a time out," Santana said and Marley nodded, her smile falling slightly.
"Marley is the best behaved little girl I have ever met, I'm sure she will be fine," Susan said kindly.
"Still. I would like her to sit and eat at two thirty and follow instructions while I'm in my session," Santana told her.
"Mommy, you go way?" Marley asked and the happy little girl who was there moments ago was now on the verge of becoming a terrified little toddler.
"For a little while. This is just like every other time we come to the club," Santana told her gently, petting her hair and face, to give her the calm, warm, fuzzy feelings, she wanted her to keep while she was there. Marley did very well in the nursery no matter who she was with. Right now though, she was starting to look scared, and Santana had to work on calming herself, so Marley stayed calm as well.
"You know what Marley? Nanny got a new toy, it's called a speak and spell and it talks to you and you can play games on it. Shall we play with the new toy?"
"Oooh, new toys, we like those," Santana smiled. "We just ordered some new toys yesterday didn't we? What did we get? Do you remember?" Santana asked trying to pull Marley into the conversation and help her get into her "happy place".
"Um, bubba," she said with a smile.
"Yes, we got bubbles, and we got side walk chalk to draw with, because it's getting warmer outside," Santana smiled.
"Those are very fun toys," Susan smiled.
"An a piano Mommy," Marley said hugging herself closer to Santana. Suddenly she didn't want her to leave.
"Yes, we did. We found a very pretty keyboard to play on, so you and Mama can sing together," Santana smiled, petting Marley a little more firmly. This could go very badly, very quickly if Santana wasn't careful.
"Those sound like wonderful toys, you'll have to show them to me when you get them," Susan smiled. "But, guess what Nanny got, just for her baby Marley?" Susan said with what she hoped was excitement in her voice to get Marley curious. Susan walked over to a cabinet and pulled out a Disney coloring book as well as a brand new box of crayons. "I thought you and Nanny could color while Mommy is in session. This is a brand new book and the only little one to ever touch it will be Marley," she told her.
"Wow," Santana said happily and excitedly. "What do you say baby girl?"
"T'ank you Nanny," she said softly.
"You are very welcome my sweet girl," she said.
"Okay my sweet girl, you go play with Nanny Susan and eat your snack at two thirty like a good girl, and Mommy will be back soon okay?" she asked giving her a few kisses and Marley shook her head no. She didn't want Santana to leave. "I have to baby, but only for a little while," she told her and she very carefully passed her over to Susan. "Stay with Nanny Susan sweetheart, you're okay, I promise," she told her and Marley burst into tears. "Shhh, you're okay baby, and Mommy will be back, I just have to go for a little while," she told her gently.
"Go on dear, I will keep her safe, I promise," Susan said and with one last kiss, Santana went off to her session and Marley broke down into sobs. This was not right. It wasn't safe. Santana had left her. Yes she was with Nanny Susan, but Terri was still out there, and they'd left her unprotected. Terri was going to show up and take her and Santana wouldn't know how to find her. She was never going to see Santana, Rachel, or Kurt ever again. "Oh my goodness my love," Susan said kindly and she gathered Marley in her arms, surprised when Marley screamed and pushed herself away, dropping to the floor, and worming her way into a corner of the room where Susan couldn't reach her.
An hour later Marley's back locked out in spasm, but she didn't care. Thirty minutes after that, her foot fell asleep and she had pins and needles running up and down her leg, thigh, and buttock. Another ten minutes passed and Marley's body released everything it was holding on to. She'd felt it coming, but she didn't dare move. "Marley baby, I don't know why you are having such a hard time honey, but Nanny cannot leave you in a messy diaper until Mommy comes back, so I'm going to come over to you and help you to the changing table. Do you remember how it's just a little bench for you to lie down on, so Nanny can help you?" she asked talking kindly to her and moving closer. It was also nearing two thirty and while Susan knew Santana wanted Marley to eat, she also knew it wasn't going to happen like this. Susan took a few steps closer to Marley and Marley let out a terrified scream. It also sounded like Marley was in pain as well.
"Okay, okay," Susan said kindly. She didn't want to fight with Marley too much on this, but she really didn't want to leave her in a messy diaper for the next hour either. So she went to the door, picked up the phone and dialed the extension for Beth's office.
"Yes my dear lady?"
"I have a very troubled little girl on my hands," Susan said.
"Do you want me to come in?"
"I think she really needs Santana, but at this point she will settle for Rachel or Kurt as well. Any chance we can get either of them down here?" she asked.
"I will call the house and see what can be done, before calling you back," Beth smiled. She made the necessary phone calls and Kurt told her, he would be down there as soon as possible. Beth called back over to the Nursery and pulled the phone away from her ear when she heard Marley scream in the background. "Why are you letting that poor girl watch horror films?" Beth teased.
"Very funny," Susan smiled. "What news do you have for me?"
"Kurt is on his way over. He should be here rather quickly based on the time of day," she said.
"Thank you Miss Beth," Susan said and the two disconnected. "Okay Marley girl. I don't know if you can hear me, but we're going to get you help pretty soon," Susan said.
"Mommy!" Marley wailed.
"Soon sweet girl. Very soon, we just have to be patient for Mommy to get out of her session. Why don't you come over here toward Nanny my love. I can change you and make you feel at least more comfortable," she tried, but Marley shrieked and pulled away, wincing in pain as her back cramped up again.
Kurt made it to the club and Nicole lead him back to the nursery. He checked the clock and sighed. It was two forty five and he was really hoping that Marley had eaten already. Her body was still regulating and he was fairly sure that she'd be in pain if she hadn't eaten yet. He was absolutely correct. He walked into the nursery and found Marley crouched in the corner, screaming in pain.
"Marley Rose!" Kurt said sternly, hoping to cut through the fog of her brain and pull her into the here and now where she would be more focused. "Marley Rose, you need to stop screaming right now my little love," he said seriously and he walked right over to her and she reached out for him, crying hard and trembling as she stretched her arms out. She knew who it was the moment she heard the new voice. She was trying to hold on to her surroundings, listening for something she knew, since when she usually got this upset, she couldn't hear anything.
Her entire body was shaking and he could feel how tight her back was. "Oh my goodness, what happened baby?" he asked her.
"Papa," she cried.
"Yes baby, Papa's here, you're okay," he told her and she shook her head no and held on to him so tightly that her back locked out again and she tried to ride out the spasm, but all that she managed to do was cry. "Breathe baby girl, I'm here, you're okay. Mommy will be here soon, and I think I know a little girl who needs to have her snack," he said.
"If I may darling, she needs to be changed before she eats," Susan said.
"Oh baby," Kurt sighed. He carefully helped Marley to her feet and hugged her tightly. "Marley, if Papa helps you to the bench over there, will you lay down so I can change you?" he asked her. She looked at him with pure fear but agreed. He was family, Nanny Susan wasn't, so as scared as she was that he might do something to her, she didn't trust Susan. It was the lesser of two evils as far as she was concerned. Kurt helped her over to the bench and then she laid down. She expected the heavy white bar, pain, roughness, and a lot of screaming to come her way. Instead Kurt started singing softly to her to help distract her. It wasn't working too well, but he made quick work of changing her and then carefully pulled her up into a seated position. She moved her legs over the edge and wrapped her them around his waist, hugging him, and crying hysterically against him while she put her head on his shoulder. The pain was radiating through her entire body now and she just wanted it to stop.
"Shhh," he soothed and he very carefully began working on her back, rubbing her body gently. Her muscles were completely rigid and he was trying to get her to calm down a little bit. "Okay Marley. You need to breathe with Papa and then you need to have your snack. I know it hurts, I can feel it, but you have to eat. It will help," he explained to her. Susan walked over and handed him the small baggie of almonds and he smiled. "Thank you," he told her and she nodded at him, backing away quietly. "You have a choice baby, do you want to eat them here, or should Papa and baby Marley sit in the nice rocking chair and cuddle while you eat?" he asked her. Her hand fished around a bit, working it's way up to his hand. She wasn't ready to talk, everything hurt too much, she just wanted him to hold her and never let go, even though she still wanted Santana.
She found his hand and searched for his middle finger. It was usually option number two, and even with her eyes closed she knew she had to choose this option. She needed to get off the bench as he called it, even though she knew it was the changing table. She had to get off of it, so she wrapped her fingers around his middle finger and didn't let go. It was option two. She wanted to sit in the rocking chair with him. He gave her the out. He gave her the chance to be Baby Marley, because he knew she needed it. He also knew she needed her Mommy and he desperately wished Rachel was here with him. She wasn't Mommy, but she was the next best thing. He was third on the list. It didn't bother him that that was the case. It did bother him, that in the current moment, no matter what he did, his baby girl was going to be upset.
Santana finished cleaning up her room and went into the bathroom to wash her hands and change her clothes. She took a moment for herself, sat down on the toilet and pulled out her phone. She had three new text messages. The first was from Rachel asking where everyone was. The second was from Kurt, saying he would be at the club and that he'd gotten a call from Beth. The third was from Rachel and it held slight panic. Santana texted Rachel a message that told her to calm down. Lady Hummel is here. Baby had a panic attack. Can you make dinner for tonight? Her phone buzzed moments later indicating dinner would be ordered from their favorite chinese restaurant.
"What does Miss Beth like to eat?"
"Order her what you order me. We eat almost all of the same things at the same take outs. Put it on my credit card. I don't want you paying while we're at Miss Beth's house."
"I can handle it."
"Yes you can, but not for the next few days. End of discussion." Santana tucked her phone back into her bag, put on clean clothes and went into the nursery, not sure of what she was going to find. She walked in quietly to find Kurt in the rocking chair and Marley curled up tight against him.
"Last one baby girl," he told her gently and he very carefully put it to her lips and she opened them to eat it. She wiggled for a moment and then settled down and Kurt shifted her a little bit. "Should Papa rub your back some more?" he asked her. "Your muscles are still very tight," he told her and she nodded tiredly.
Santana waited while Marley shifted so she was seated in Kurt's lap, her body resting against his, her chin resting on his shoulder, her back to the door, and then Santana moved further into the room. She walked over to the rocking chair and sat down on the matching ottoman that also rocked and fell into a rhythm with Kurt. He didn't say anything. He wanted Marley to realize it for herself, the same way she had realized he walked into the room. "Papa," she whispered tiredly. "Owies," she told him honestly.
"Should Papa rub your back a little bit to make it better?" he offered her and she nodded. "Alright my sweet girl. I will gladly do anything I can to help you feel better," he told her.
"Papa, Mommy, pee, I wan' Mommy," she pleaded. Her back was killing her and Kurt was good as massaging it, but Marley wanted her Mommy. She wanted to be Santana's baby girl. She didn't want anything other than that, because when she was with Santana she felt safe and protected. She'd felt that from day one, all those days ago, when she first met Santana in the hospital.
Kurt looked at Santana for a moment and she shook her head no and made a hand signal for him to keep talking. She was hoping that he could get her to open up a little more. "Mommy's pretty great, isn't she?" he asked and for the first time in a very long time, he saw Santana blush while Marley nodded. "Why do you miss Mommy so much sweetheart? Can you tell me?" he asked her.
"Mommy safe," she said quietly.
"Mommy makes you feel safe?" he asked and she nodded and wiggled a little bit, into a more comfortable position. He rubbed her muscles directly and she let out a soft and happy sigh. "What else is good about Mommy?" he asked her.
"No hitting," she said softly.
"Yes, that is true. Mommy thinks that hitting you is wrong. I've heard Mommy tell you before that you are too special to be hit. Did you get hit a lot?" he asked.
"Only da bad peoples," she said softly, her eyes closing and exhaustion started to take over her body.
"Do you think you're with bad people now?" he asked.
"Mommy good. Mommy safe. Mommy 'tect me," she said tiredly.
He wanted to ask her if she knew the difference between a simple hitting and a beating. He had been spanked as a kid. He knew Santana was, she'd been very open about it, about everything, even if he and Rachel didn't want to hear it. He wasn't sure about Rachel. In the current moment though, he just wanted to know if Marley understood the difference, but with the rocking and her now full belly, she was resting against him and snoring softly.
Santana let out a little laugh once she realized Marley was truly sleeping and smiled at Kurt. "Who called you?" she asked.
"Miss Beth," he said.
"Where was Susan?" she asked.
"Susan was here when I walked in, but our baby girl was hysterical and I think Susan was afraid to touch her," he said.
"She's usually hysterical," Santana grouched.
"Not like this Santana. This was like that time she came out of the shower with you and wouldn't stop screaming, only this time she was screaming in pain," he explained.
"You stay here, with her, keep her resting for as long as you can, and thank you for getting her to eat, relatively on time," she said and then she left the room.
Santana marched down the hall. She wasn't really prepared for this, but there were a mountain of feelings piling up inside her and she needed to get them out, so she barged into Beth's office, and slammed her hand on the desk. "Why are you breaking my kid!" she growled protectively.
"Santana, you are on very thin ice," Beth told her just as sternly.
"I don't care. That is my kid. I put her in your care. You are the person responsible for this staff, so why is my kid freaking out!" she barked and before she could even feel a hint of satisfaction, she found herself bare assed over Beth's desk on the receiving end of a spanking. She put up a fuss and kicked and screamed and tried to wiggle away, which just earned her more, but she knew this.
"I don't know what has gotten into you Santana, but I will never put up with blatant disrespect!" Beth scolded as she continued to lay into Santana, spanking her bare bottom, turning the already tanned skin a dark shade of pink.
Santana continued to kick and scream, struggling, knowing it wasn't going to do any good, but she was putting up a fight and getting out a lot of pent up frustration and the stinging slaps were her punishment for failing Marley. Two minutes later Beth pulled out her hairbrush and gave Santana ten solid whacks on each cheek. Each one sent a jolt of some type of electricity through Santana's body and by the end of the twenty smacks, she was in tears and on her knees at Beth's feet.
"I'm sorry I didn't ask. I'm sorry I was rude, thank you for punishing me, and I'm sorry I failed Marley. I don't know what else to do," she panted, forcing out all the words she wanted to say and then she fell into the same heart breaking sobs, that Marley had from time to time.
Beth kept Santana in place and guided Santana's head to her lap, petting her hair and soothing her emotions as best she could. "You know that I should spank you further for causing such a scene instead of just asking for what you needed," Beth said simply.
"I didn't know how else to do it," Santana said sniffling a little bit. "And I couldn't ask for it, because it's weird to ask to get spanked for something to me," Santana said.
"Look at me my darling. You think you failed Marley. Why?" she asked and Santana brushed away her tears.
"She's so broken. She wants to live in little girl world, pretty much all the time. I really don't have a problem with that, but I can't make it clear to her that if she doesn't put in the work and listen to the rules she's never going to heal."
Beth took in everything Santana was saying, while petting her hair and rubbing her upper back gently and Santana was perfectly content to keep her head in Beth's lap and be calmed. "What rules does she not follow?" Beth asked kindly.
"She's not eating. We can see her ribs and her spine when we give her a bath at night. Her muscles and her body need the nourishment and nutrients to get her well. She's so close and she has been doing nothing but fighting us on it."
"When did you enlist this rule?"
"Last night I insisted she be a part of it, and in the beginning all she did was fight me," Santana said.
"Was she naughty enough to require whatever it is that you do?"
"Time outs. I can't spank her. She's been beaten too much and while my spanking her isn't a beating, I don't want to frighten her. And no, she didn't," Santana said.
"So you're upset that you couldn't get her to do exactly as you asked after a few minutes?" Beth asked kindly.
"It was four hours between when we told her and when we all sat down to dinner."
"Honey, I want you to listen to me very carefully please. Marley, right now, and last night, Marley is a baby girl. Your baby girl. You are her Mommy, and she knows it. She believes that she is yours as much as she believes that the sky is blue. What you say goes, and eventually she does follow your rules, but like all babies, they give their Mamas a hard time to start," Beth said. "You have to give her and you some time, and you have to stop being so hard on yourself. You Rachel and Kurt are the best things to ever happy to that little girl," Beth said.
"She's not walking, she's back to not speaking, she isn't sleeping right, and she just recovered from a fever. She was never sick in the hospital, but in my care, she was," Santana whined.
"Santana," Beth said taking Santana's chin and making them look eye to eye with each other. "Sweetheart, look at me please," she said kindly brushing away Santana's tears with her thumbs. Santana took a breath and looked at Beth. "Sweetheart, you have done wonders for Marley, and I mean that. You helped her heal her mouth so she could speak again. You kept her going to therapy so that she would become mobile and now she is. No, she isn't walking yet, but she is crawling, she does try things, she's getting there my darling, but you can't expect months of abuse to be fixed overnight. I know it's cliche, but it is absolutely the truth. You aren't failing her my love," Beth said and Santana couldn't help it, she broke down into tears. As far as she was concerned, Marley was her charge, her baby, her person to look after and she was convinced, she wasn't giving Marley her best efforts. What was worse, was that she didn't know how to make it better.
It had been two days now and Beth told her visitors that they were allowed to go back to their home, it was now equipped with a top of the line security system. "You my darlings, will be very safe, in your own home," Beth had explained to them. It took about an hour to gather all of their things and then Beth had the limo driver take them home.
Marley was pretty scared the entire time, but between her 'parents' they managed to get her upstairs and to the front door of their house with minimal fuss. She did however stand next to Rachel, face buried from the world while they tapped in the key code to the alarm. She didn't feel very comfortable and she was now craving reassurance from her 'parents' like she never had craved it before. Even when they went to Beth's house, she wasn't this scared. Knowing full well that Terri had been here, looking for her. That was what scared her the most.
"Okay big girl, come on," Rachel said gently and she went to turn Marley around so they could walk into the house together, the way they always helped Marley walk anywhere. Marley however, squealed and started to shake, pushing herself further into Rachel, her grip becoming knuckle white. "Come on sweetheart, the house is very safe. Miss Beth would not have sent us back here if it wasn't," Rachel said kindly and she tried again.
Santana watched for a moment and then moved in close. "Marley baby, it's okay. We're going to go in and have a snack, and watch tv. It's been a very tense morning for you and Mr. Joe is coming by later for therapy. We're just going to rest in our house, where we are safe," Santana told her.
Marley didn't want to look, but she loosened her grip slightly and the three girls went inside while Kurt made a list of what was needed at the grocery store. They had Marley sit on the couch and she curled up into Rachel. She didn't want to go through today. It was a lot of change and familiarity, all at the same time. She also wasn't sure she wanted to be a little girl or a big girl today and she was never sure what her family wanted. Sometimes she wasn't even sure they considered themselves her family. She'd told her story to the police, so it was only a matter of time before they got rid of her. Telling her story meant she could process things in her own brain, heal and move forward. No one ever told her if moving forward meant she'd be on her own again and she didn't know how to ask it either.
She sat on the couch curled into Rachel and Santana finally walked over with a bottle of water. "At least half baby," she told her kindly and Marley started to protest immediately, but only through whining, rather than any actual verbal communication. "That's not something I understand baby, use your words and help me out," she told her taking off the cap and handing Marley the bottle, but Marley whined and pushed it away. "Ah, ah, ah, we talked about this. You need to do this. You need to help your body get stronger, so you have to drink. Little sips while you watch tv with Mama," Santana said.
"Nooo," Marley whined.
"Would you rather Mommy put it in a cup?" Santana tried. If Marley was just being stubborn then there was nothing Santana could really do, except just be as patient and loving as possible. If she was starting to freak out about something then she had to communicate it so Santana could help her. Marley shook her head no and Santana sighed. "You have to drink baby. You can drink it out of the bottle it's in, or I can put it in a cup. that's your call, but you are going to drink," Santana told her and again Marley whined. "If you don't follow the rules baby, you lose tv for the rest of the afternoon. Marley's eyes got wide. Santana wasn't one to take stuff away if she didn't listen, but apparently that was an option now and Marley wondered what else Santana would take away if she didn't listen. Thinking it would be basic necessities like food and clothes and shelter, Marley's brain went into overdrive. She looked questioningly at Santana and knew she couldn't ask the burning question she had inside her now.
If Santana was going to take away tv for not listening, what else would she take away? Would she keep her in diapers forever, would she force her to be naked a majority of the time, would she take away her speech again. Sometimes Marley wondered why they even let her get it back. She barely spoke to anyone on her really bad days, but they never scolded her for it. "Little sips Marley," Santana told her jolting her out of her thoughts.
Marley reluctantly took a small sip and then handed the bottle back to Santana. "Thank you baby girl," she said leaning in and giving her a kiss to her temple. Marley then fell into Rachel and Rachel was happy to cuddle her tight. "You cuddle with Mama until Mr. Joe gets here, and I want at least half the bottle gone by the time he does okay? Little sips over and over," Santana told her kindly. Then she stood up, kissed her forehead again and then headed to the kitchen to prepare some type of snack for when Marley was done with therapy.
There was a knock on the door and Marley immediately cowered next to Rachel and started shaking. "Shhh, it's Mr. Joe baby, he's here for therapy," Rachel explained but Marley didn't believe her. Terri was around, or at least had been around and none of them had been informed as to what was happening with Terri. All Marley knew was that the place she thought was safe, wasn't, so she and her care takers were sent away to someone else's house for three days, and then was brought back to her house. Her entire world was turned upside down in three days.
Santana went to the door and let Joe in and spoke quietly. "I hope it's a simple session, she is completely out of her mind today," she said. Joe gave her a curious look and Santana sighed heavily and rolled her eyes. "We had to leave for three days because Terri was here, looking for her," she said and his eyes went wide. "I want to keep things as routine for her as possible," she said.
"Speaking as a professional," he said cautiously. "Get her a therapist, and fast," he told her and went further into the room and smiled, putting on a happy demeanor and speaking to her as he always did. "Marley my girl! Are you ready for therapy today?" he asked her.
"Mommy stay?" she asked him.
"Absolutely. Mommy can stay," he smiled. She nodded at him and took his hand when he offered it to her. "Come on, we're going to try walking today," he told her.
"No!" she shouted at him.
"Marley Rose!" Santana scolded. "Apologize now!"
"No walk Mommy," she said calmly.
"Apologize," Santana said.
"Sorry," she told Joe and then she looked to Santana. "No walk Mommy, no" she said.
"Why baby? Why do you not want to walk?" Santana asked, softening a great deal. Marley did as asked, so she couldn't continue to scold her.
"Owies," she said with a pout.
"Only if you delay it. If you do everything Mr. Joe says, and you make sure you eat like Mama, Papa, and I say, I promise you baby, you will not have any pain," Santana said.
"Owies Mommy," she said sadly.
"Only if you don't follow instructions sweetheart. I know you're scared, and it's okay to be scared, but if you do what Mr. Joe says, and eat like Mommy says, then you won't have any pain, I promise," Santana told her.
"Owies," she said softly and Santana wrapped her in a hug.
"Marley, do you know how much Mommy loves you?" she asked her gently and Marley didn't respond. "Well I'm going to tell you then," Santana said. "Marley Rose, you are my little girl, no matter what age you are. The thing about Mommies though is they are a little bit annoying. They make sure their children eat what they're supposed to, clean them up when they need to be, and punish them when they are naughty. I know that you are scared, and I know that you really don't want to do this today, and I know that you're having trouble with all the new surroundings we've been dealing with these last three days, but I still love you. I still want what's best for you, because that is what all good Mommies want for their children, to succeed and be happy. We're working on the succeeding thing, and every day all I ever want is for you to be happy," she explained.
Marley let the tears fall and looked into Santana's eyes. They were so sincere and she couldn't find any motive behind her words. All Marley saw were the eyes of a woman who truly, oddly somehow, cared for her and she was someone Marley learned to trust. She'd learned to trust her the very first day when Santana rubbed lotion on her hands. "What do I do?" Marley finally asked Joe.
"Well if you want Mommy to stay, she can hold you up. We'll start with balance, like we've been practicing and then I just want two steps. One with each foot. So let's start with balance. Mommy can help you to start. Once you're ready, Mommy will take her hands off for five seconds and we're going to progress slowly. Marley nodded and got ready, preparing herself for what was about to happen. Then she nodded at Santana who removed her hands for five seconds and Marley balanced very well. Santana put her hands back on her body and Santana praised her while kissing her temple repeatedly. "That was wonderful Marley. Four more times, just like that," Joe smiled.
After she finished Joe praised her heavily and smiled. "Okay, now I want you to move your left foot forward. I'm going to hold you and not let go while you move. Once you're set and stable then I will let go," he explained.
"Big space?" she asked looking down at her feet.
"No honey, just a small one. Here. Put your toe by mine and that will be enough," he told her. She did as asked and wobbled side to side while her body tried to stay upright.
"I'm right here honey," Santana told her kindly.
"It's just like every other time Marley. Your muscles were kept in the same position for a great deal of time, so they have atrophied, my job is to change that. It takes time though, but I want you to know how well you are doing and you are doing exceptionally well," he told her.
She didn't feel like she was doing exceptionally well though. Crawling was how she got around on her own. If she walked it was because she had at least one person, if not more, supporting her entire weight and moving her body. The only thing she could do on her own right now was feed herself and lately she just didn't want to do that. She wasn't sure why she didn't want to, she just knew she didn't. She was feeling depressed and while she knew what she was feeling, she didn't want to communicate this to anyone.
Therapy progressed and just before they finished, Joe picked up Santana's phone and moved over toward Rachel. "Go stand by Marley please," he said and Rachel did as asked. "Alright then girls, here's the deal. Marley dear, you're about to take your very first new steps, and all on your own. Your Mommies are right next to you, but they are not going to hold you. They are going to be close to you, do you understand the difference?" he asked her kindly and she nodded at him.
"I'm sorry, can we give her a barrier please?" Santana asked and Marley looked at her in shock. Why would Santana do that? Why would she ask to change Mr. Joe's rules. Mr. Joe was making Marley walk on her own and now Santana was trying to stop that. Marley was so confused.
"Define the barrier," Joe said kindly.
"If Rachel and I just hold hands, at least she'll be surrounded by us, so if she starts to topple any which way, we can catch her," she said. After a moment Joe agreed and she and Santana joined hands, effectively encasing Marley in a small circle.
"Ring around the rosie," Rachel started to sing.
"Rachel is annoying," Santana sang. She wasn't in the mood for antics right now. She was actually pretty scared for Marley, but she leaned in and kissed Marley's temple. "Whenever you are ready my sweet girl," she told her and stood back to let Marley try, but Marley looked up at Joe and started to cry and shake her head. She was standing still on her own, not holding on to anything, or anyone, but she was convinced one step and she would be done for.
"It's alright Marley," he told her and she cried harder. This was incredibly hard for both Rachel and Santana, but Marley had to learn. Joe walked over to them and gently pushed Rachel and Santana closer so Marley didn't panic. "Shhh, it's okay, maybe Mr. Joe moved to fast," he said kindly. "Here hold on to their shoulders, it will help you more," he told her and she put a death grip on each of them.
"You're okay baby, I'm here, Mommy's here and we would never let anything bad happen to you," Rachel told her kindly, hoping to help her out some more.
"Mommy," she cried and instantly burst into tears. Rachel took her hips to steady her and Santana wrapped her in a hug and her tears became heart wrenching sobs. She'd been in therapy for an hour so far today, just practicing balance and movement. She'd been in therapy for months and nothing was getting better. She was so frustrated and done with the entire thing, she didn't know what to do any more. She simply fell into Santana and cried.
"Shhh, I'm right here baby," Santana soothed, keeping her close and rubbing her back.
"You know what Marley, you did really well. Therapy is over for today. Tomorrow we will try again," Joe said kindly and he left for the day.