Chapter twelve:
Rodger heads to the hospital since he has a bad feeling so he went to the hospital just in case. He spots a doctor. "Excuse me is Nate or Mello here?" He asks.
"Oh you don't know?" The doctor says a little surprised.
Rodger's heart sinks more into the bad feeling. "Know what?"
"Nate died earlier today." The doctor says. "We burnt the body and gave Mello the ashes to keep. He grabbed Nate's stuff from the room then left."
Rodger's face falls. "Oh. That's sad."
The doctor nods. "I hope Mello will be ok."
Rodger nods. "So do I. I will keep an eye on him. Thank you." He then turns and heads out back to the orphanage. He feels worried for Mello.
Once back at the orphanage he heads to Mello's room.
He finds Matt is hugging Mello trying to be a good friend to try to make him feel better.
This makes him smile softly at the sight.
He turns to leave them alone for a little bit. He'll come back later.
…
Mello cries as Matt holds him trying to be a good friend to be there for him.
Matt knows there is only so much he can do for Mello but he surely hopes that it will be enough.
Mello's P.O.V.
I will never love again or be with anyone.
Nate is my only my own and even in death I will not cheat on him. He is the only one I will ever truly love.
No one else will ever even try to take his place for me.
A few months later….
Even though there was no body there was a funeral for Nate that I attended of course. But that was back around the time he died.
I cannot get myself to let go of them and I never will let go of them as they are the treasure of my life. I sigh and sit down on my bed. I sometimes wonder if I really have any reason to keep living now. I bring a hand to the small bottle of ashes and I hold it close to my heart. "This world feels so empty but the ashes help to keep a small spark of how bright this world was once to me." I bring the bottle up towards my mouth laying a gentle kiss on the bottle. I stay like that for a few moments with my lips almost touching but not quiet then I gentle put it down again only to turn to look out the window of my room. I sometimes imagine there is a smiling face of my dearest Nate in the sky when I look outside.
A knock comes to my door and I say a kind of quiet come in.
Rodger enters and I look to him. "Mello." He says gently.
I look away to out the window. "What is it Rodger?" I say uncaring.
He sighs softly and comes over to sit next to me. "Listen." He begins. "I know it's hard to accept the truth and hard to deal with what it is but just staying away from everyone and sulking all alone is not going to do anything."
I growl slightly. "You wouldn't understand. If this is all you came here to say then leave." I know I'm being rude but I am just too mentally down to even care anymore.
He sighs again. "Oh Mello. Why do you have to make this so hard? Why can't you just move on already? I'm sure there is someone here or somewhere else who would be willing to be with you." He says.
I snarl and turn to give him a death glare. "FORGET IT!" I snap making him look to me from where he was looking at the floor. "NO ONE WILL EVER BE ABLE TO REPLACE OR EVEN BEGIN TO THINK OF REPLACING!" I bring a hand to the bottle of ashes again. "LEAVE!" I turn my back to him refusing to listen to him anymore.
A few seconds of silence floats around us.
"Even L is worried Mello." He finally speaks.
If this was back before that time then I would have cared but now…. It's too late to care about it…
"That's nice." I grunt still keeping my back to him.
He gives a deep sigh. "What am I supposed to do Mello?" He mumbles but I still managed to hear him since he spoke just loud enough.
"Leave me alone." I answer simply.
"Mello you are supposed to be the number one choice to succeed L. You can't just keep this up." He says a little sternly.
I turn to him with the death glare that beats all death glares, except for any that I gave to those who hit on or hurt the one I cherish the most. "NO!" I growl. "LEAVE NOW RODGER OR I WILL LEAVE." I warned him.
"Mello." He looks to me with slightly wide eyes.
I don't back down one bit as I wait counting down in my head.
Five…
"Mello this is absurd. Think about what you're saying. Think about you're future."
Four…..
"Mello. Think about it. You can be L's successor."
Three….
"Don't be serious about such a thing Mello."
Two….
"Mello! Are you even listening?!"
One…..
"Don't do this!"
Zero.
I get up and I walk towards the door.
Rodger gets up and chases after me. "MELLO!"
I dash away and I manage to lose him thanks to me being faster than him. I know he'll have teachers looking for me soon so I need to leave this place. I sneak my way back to my room doing everything possible to not be seen. I get to my room which no one is in anymore. I grab a small back pack and I begin packing things I'll need. I zip it closed and sling it onto myself. I put my untraceable cell into my pocket since I now hear the rain pattering against the window so I need to do my best to keep it dry if I don't want to lose some stuff that are very important like pictures of my fiancée Nate as we happily hung out they are almost as important as the ashes to me. I look to my closest and I notice the white jacket I bought for Nate. I grab it and put it on enjoying the smell that is somewhat faintly on it…. A smell I will never forget…. The smell of Nate….. I grab my back pack, which I put down to put on the jacket, then I leave not caring who sees me and not listening to anyone who calls after me. I walk right out the door leaving that place as I feel eyes on me as I leave but I ignore them. My head down so the shadows cast from my bangs cover my eyes.
The rain running down my face I continue to walk in the rain help hide my tears that poured out of my eyes as I let myself think of the painful memories like I have done many times before.
My life wasn't always like this… I know that well….. and to think it all started with a simple trip thanks to a fight.
I let my memories once again run through my time with Nate from when I first met him till his death. I grip the strap of the backpack a little harder.
My love….. Nate….
I continue off on my way. I know that I have enough money in my account that is given to each orphan so we don't start out with nothing.
But I know I'll need to get a job.
No one's P.O.V.
Rodger watches Mello go then he turns to the phone. He picks it up calling L. He waits for an answer. "L….. It's Rodger….." He begins. "It seems Mello has left. His grief drove him away from anything else."
There is a pause then L speaks.
"I had a feeling something like this might happen." He says. "Let Mello go."
Rodger blinks in surprise at this.
"He needs to decide on his own where he will head in life." L explains. "It's for the best he does this."
"Ok." Rodger says trusting L.