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Way The Wind Blows
Chapter Thirty Two
TWENTY YEARS LATER
A soft summer breeze blew across a vast hilly graveyard. Trees lined a winding gray stone path, and Chakotay walked slowly down it. His hair was silver now and his face was lined and creased from age. He was wearing a black jacket over black pants, and in his right hand he held a large bunch of daisies tied with a blue ribbon.
After walking for a while, he turned off the path and walked towards a tall white marble pillar. As he did, a woman walked towards him, a tall woman with a blonde bob and a bright pink jacket over white pants, and as she got closer Chakotay recognized her.
"Mel?"
The woman smiled warmly and stopped before him. "Hi, Chakotay. Long time no see."
"It certainly has been a while. How are you?"
"Same as ever. You?"
"Okay. Finally made it to Admiral."
"So I heard. Congratulations."
"Thank you."
"If you're wondering what I'm doing here, I was putting flowers on my mom. It's her birthday today and I like to, you know?"
"Same here. I come on Kathryn's birthday and I come on the day our son was due. At least, I try to. Sometimes, like this time, I'm away. But I come at the first opportunity. I like to give him daisies." They were a symbol of childhood innocence and, in Chakotay's mind, his son was forever a little boy. A beautiful little boy with black hair and a cheeky smile.
Mel looked at him sadly. "You really loved Janeway, didn't you?"
Tears welled in Chakotay's eyes. "She was my life. When Polark took her life, took our son's, he took mine too."
"I don't think she'd want that, Chakotay. I think she'd want you to be happy, to have a life with someone else."
"Maybe," Chakotay answered. "But there's no one else for me. I haven't been with anyone since the day she died and I never will. I can't even bear the thought."
Mel was silent for a moment, then she spoke. "I wish I had known it," she said quietly.
"Known what?"
"What it is to love and be loved as much as you loved each other. When I was a kid, I'd dream of my knight in shining armor and how we'd have a nice home and five kids. I've often wondered what happened to that kid, how she grew up to become the woman that I am...or the woman that I was for most of my life." She then smiled. "I know I said I never would, but I got hitched again. My Bryan. I ain't going to lie and say it's some great love, because it ain't, but we do have love, know what I mean? And for me it's as good as I'm going to get. But I wish I 'd known the kind of love you guys had. I think it's what we all want but only some folks get."
"My mother used to say that a man alone was only half of a whole," Chakotay said, "but I never understood what she meant until I met Kathryn. For so many years I searched for peace within myself, but I never thought I'd find it in loving and being loved." He paused. "Kathryn was so brave, so strong. There had been so much pain in her life, so much loneliness and sorrow, but she'd never became bitter, never hurt others to ease her own pain. She was everything I ever longed to be. Not only did she show me how to be a better man, but in loving her I wanted to be a better man, and in loving her I found that I was."
"You were always a good guy, Chakotay," Mel said kindly. "I think that's why...well, why I had the hots for you for so long. You'd always listen to my problems, no matter what kind of mess I'd got myself into, and you'd never take advantage, not like the other guys. Sometimes I just needed a shoulder, you know? And you'd always lend me yours, no strings attached. You had real decency. And you cared so much for nature and animals and stuff like that. Most guys just cared for themselves." She paused. "Janeway was lucky to have you."
Chakotay lowered his eyes. "No. I failed her. I failed our son."
"It wasn't your fault what happened."
"It was. I was the one who let Seska join my crew, I was the one who was blinded by her, and I was the one who didn't see her defection coming. Kathryn was innocent of it all. She always treated Seska with the same respect as she did everyone else. If Polark was intent on having revenge, he should have killed me, not her. I was to blame."
"He was crazy, Chakotay. Like most Cardassians. It wasn't your fault." She paused. "But I'm sorry. I'm sorry he's never paid for what he did."
"He is going to pay, Mel. I'm going to make him pay."
"But how? No one knows where to find him."
"I do. And when I find him, I'm going to kill him."
Mel's eyes widened in fear. "You can't, Chakotay. If you do, no matter how just your motive, you'll be done for murder. They'll put you in prison."
"They won't because they won't know it's me. I've got it all covered."
"Let Starfleet Command know where he is and they'll get him. Don't take the law into your own hands."
"Starfleet won't go where I'm going."
"Don't do it, Chakotay," she implored. "I know you want him to pay, but this isn't the way. And what if he kills you instead? Don't let him take your life too."
"As I said, he took my life when he killed my wife and my son. I don't have a life to risk. And even if I did, I would gladly risk it for this." He put his hand on Mel's shoulder. "I appreciate the concern, but I know what I'm doing. I've got it all planned. And, when I'm done, everything will be better."
Wind howled around the cabin that Chakotay had once shared with Kathryn and heavy rain beat down on the roof. The cabin had been Chakotay's home for twenty years, but he had changed very little in it. He wanted everything to look just like it had when Kathryn was alive. It helped him feel closer to her, made him feel that in some way she was still with him.
Inside the cabin, Chakotay sat before a simulated fire and tied up black laces on his shoes. He was wearing a red Starfleet uniform, and the pips on his collar indicated that he was an Admiral.
When he had finished lacing up his shoes, he got to his feet and fixed a belt holding a phaser and a tricorder to his waist. Then he put on his Starfleet jacket.
From a shabby brown faux-fur rug before the fire, a well groomed sheepdog watched him. The animal's dark eyes were sad as she knew that every time her master put on his uniform, he was going out.
When he was fully dressed, Chakotay knelt before his dog and tickled her ear. "You've been a good friend and companion to me, Gertie," he said, tears in his eyes. "But you can't come where I'm going. That means we're not going to see each other again. At least not in this life. But whatever happens to you in the next one, I know Phoebe will make sure you get a good home."
He then buried his face in the animal's soft fur and held her head against his for a moment. When at last he drew away, Gertie looked at him curiously. This wasn't his usual goodbye.
Chakotay then reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a personal communication device.
"Chakotay to B'Elanna."
Seconds later, B'Elanna responded. "Hi, Chakotay."
"Hi. I might be going away for a few days, work related. Is there any chance you could look after Gertie for me?"
"In normal circumstances I'd be happy too," B'Elanna replied, "but I'm going away myself. In fact, I'm on my way now. Miral and Mikal are with me. We're going to stay with my mother for a few days. You can try asking Tom, but he's really got his hands full with a new holonovel he's working on, and you may find a starved dog when you get home."
Chakotay had to smile at that. "I get the picture. Have a good trip."
"Thanks. Sorry I couldn't help."
"No worries. Chakotay out." The connection terminated and Chakotay looked at his dog. "Guess you'll have to come along after all."
There was no one else he could ask. Ever since Kathryn had been killed, he had kept mostly to himself and consequently had few friends. Phoebe had gone to an art exhibition on Varlika Prime, and apart from her and B'Elanna, everyone else he knew was rather afraid of Gertie. The few times he had left her in a kennel, it had broken her heart, so he didn't want to leave her there. For better or for worse, the dog would have to come with him.
As Chakotay expected, the corridors at Starfleet Headquarters were quiet. It was almost 9pm and not many people were about. He only passed three people as he made his way through the long corridors, and he arrived without effort at his place of destination, which was a highly secured lab. It was so secure that there were even two security guards standing outside high silver doors that led inside.
"Good evening," Chakotay said, trying to act as normally as possible.
"Good evening, Admiral," the two men replied in unison.
Chakotay went over to the access control pad, and keyed in a security code he had managed to steal by old Maquis tactics. The silver doors faithfully opened, and Chakotay stepped inside. Once he was inside, the doors shut behind him.
The lab was bigger than he had thought it would be, and there were quite a few storage units. Chakotay took out his tricorder and scanned them. All but two of them were empty, and one was just a chemical storage cupboard. He went over to the other unit, and found that it needed a security code to be accessed. Thankfully, it needed only a general Starfleet access code, so he typed in his own. The doors on the silver unit opened, and Chakotay looked inside. There were a lot of shelves, most of them in use, and one of them had four unlabeled bottles on it. Chakotay scanned the bottles with his tricorder, and found that the same serum that was inside all of them could not be identified. However, the ingredients of the serum could be identified, and according to his tricorder, the serum was safe for human injection. It had to be the serum he was looking for. As carefully as he could, he reached into the unit and took out one of the bottles. He then put it into his jacket pocket, closed the unit, and left the lab as quickly as he could.
In the safety of his shuttle, Chakotay took the bottle out of his pocket and looked at it.
"One down," he said, talking to Gertie who was standing beside him. "One to go."
He then put the serum back into his pocket and made his way over to the helm. As soon as he was seated, he began to scan Starfleet Headquarters. Gertie walked over to him, jumped onto the vacant chair beside him, and curled up comfortably.
"Scan complete," Chakotay said. "Penetrating defenses...getting a lock...energizing."
Blue light glowed behind him, and Chakotay turned around just in time to see the temporal transporter materialize before him.
"Victory," Chakotay smiled.
But there was no time to savor the moment. He turned back to the helm and worked busily.
"They'll be coming after us, old-girl," he said. "Got to get away..." His fingers flew over the console. "Maximizing shields...bringing the cloak online...setting a course to space..."
In less than a minute, his shuttle was soaring to the stars. Chakotay sat back in his chair and reached over to his dog, petting her. "Home dry, my friend," he smiled. "We're home dry."
Three hours later, satisfied that no Starfleet ships were in pursuit, Chakotay brought his shuttle to a standstill and powered up the temporal transporter by feeding it from the warp core of his vessel. For the past three months he had ate, slept and breathed transporter mechanics, and was sure he now knew enough to operate the transporter successfully.
After a couple of failed efforts, the transporter booted up and Chakotay managed to access the main computer system.
"Now, all we need is to put in the destination co-ordinates," he said to Gertie. "Should be easy enough."
With no difficulty at all he managed to the open the imputation box, but to his dismay, he found that the transporter's computer system would only accept coded destination co-ordinates.
"Damn," he said, slamming his hand hard against the machine, "it only accepts codes."
He took a deep breath and forced himself to think.
"But there must be a way of deciphering it."
He took out his tricorder, tried to use it to decipher the code, but was unsuccessful.
"All I get is gibberish," he said, his frustration growing. "But there's got to be some way of deciphering it..."
He returned to the helm and downloaded the contents of his tricorder into his shuttle's computer system.
"Computer," he said, when it was done, "based on the information I've just given you, can you decipher the code used?"
"Unable to decipher code. Code is too sophisticated."
"Can you make any guesses?"
"Based on information given, guesses can be made regarding times, stardates, and location."
"What would you guess the code is for 14:30 hours, stardate 55971.5, location SF 562417.50?"
"Based on information provided, guessed code for 14.30 hours, stardate 55971.5, location SF 562417.50? is ahjk hours, stardate hu234789hkl, location 89iuauiobril."
"Transfer guessed code to my tricorder."
The computer did as he asked. "Transfer complete."
"Also transfer to my tricorder what you guess the code is for 15:00 hours stardate 55971.5"
"Transfer complete."
Chakotay then picked up his tricorder and returned to the temporal transporter. He carefully entered the first code given for the destination co-ordinates, and then the second as the retrieval co-ordinates.
When he was finished, he set up the transporter to auto-transport him back, specifying a global scan to locate him. If the computer had wrongly guessed the code, and he found himself in the wrong place at the wrong time, all he had to do was make sure he did nothing to disrupt the timeline. Then, providing he had the right serum and it worked, he would be transported back here and he could try again with an amended code. What would happen if his mission was successful, he didn't know. Perhaps the time-police would remove him from a time-frame he wasn't meant to be in, perhaps he would fade away as the future he came from faded from existence, or perhaps he would be stuck in the past for the rest of his life. If he was, he would do what Kathryn had suggested all those years ago...he would make himself invisible and exist in an existence he was not meant to exist in.
"Now all I need is to inject myself with the serum," Chakotay said, turning away from the transporter. "Let's hope I've got the right bottle."
He went over to a med-kit that he kept in the shuttle, opened it, and took out a hypospray. Then he pulled the bottle of serum out of his pocket. He carefully filled the hypospray with the serum, and then injected it into his neck. When that was done, he returned to the transporter and set it up to transport him in twenty seconds.
The flashing green and pink lights on the grid turned white, indicating that a transport had been programmed, and Chakotay stepped onto it.
Gertie watched him, and Chakotay looked at her sadly. "Goodbye, Gertie."
Then a red light descended on him and he felt the familiar tingle of transportation.
When Chakotay rematerialized, he found himself in the side garden of the large house he and Kathryn had once shared in San Francisco. The computer had accurately guessed the location, he only hoped she had accurately guessed the time and the date. He took out his tricorder, activated it, and found that while the date was correct, the time was a little later than he had wanted. Instead of being 14:30, it was 14:40.
Not wanting to waste a moment, Chakotay hurried over to a large white door only a few feet away from him, and keyed in an access code from memory. His plan was to enter the house, make his way to the conservatory, and kill Polark before he could kill Kathryn. However, as the door opened, Chakotay found to his horror that the hallway was full of smoke.
"No," he cried. "I'm too late. Dammit, I'm too late!"
Without closing the door, Chakotay hurried around the side of the house, rushed through the back garden, and burst into the conservatory. Smoke gushed towards him from the living room as the double glass doors that usually divided the two rooms were wide open. Chakotay looked around, desperately scanning the room with his eyes, and pain knifed his heart when he saw Kathryn lying lifelessly on the floor, Topsy beside her. Kathryn was lying on her side, her head at an awkward angle, and there was blood on the dungarees she was wearing.
Almost blinded by tears, Chakotay rushed over to her and frantically searched for her pulse.
"No," he wept when he couldn't find it. "No, Kathryn..." He reached for his tricorder and scanned her, but it only told him what he already knew. Both she and the baby were dead.
Weeping, he took her hand in his and kissed it. "I won't let you die," he vowed. "I'll be back, Kathryn. I promise I'll be back."
END OF CHAPTER THIRTY TWO