*A/N: I rewrote this chapter twice and decided to leave it just like it is now. Rewrites drive my beta & I nuts. But I've always LOVED this chapter's song title!

Chapter Summary: A surfing date brings Bella out of the house, but the outcome pushes Bella back into her old way of thinking; is Edward really out of her life or is Jacob just a pleasant, friendly distraction that she doesn't mind having around? Jacob is finally able to reveal what has been in his heart since day one and Bella is finally able to hear the truth; or at least part of it.

*Disclaimer: None; I do not own Twilight.

Chapter XXIV Title: 'Learning to Breathe,' by Switchfoot

I had ice on my neck all through breakfast. Luckily Renee didn't get home until closer to eleven so most of the swelling had gone down and I pulled my big shirt over my neck while holding my knees to my chest as we talked. Jacob sat across from me and my mom went back and forth between our faces before she finally exclaimed, "Bella, you don't have to hide your hickey from me. I'm not Charlie. But honestly, I would think that you'd be more careful since you are so pale."

Jacob laughed at my expense again as I turned crimson. I still refused to prove Renee even half right with a visual.

After one in afternoon, I heard Renee's phone ring and she turned it over to me. I looked at her in confusion. I knew it couldn't be Charlie. He didn't like to hover and would have allowed me to make the phone calls first. "Hello?"

"Bella? It's Jessica. What are you and Jacob doing today?"

I looked at Jake knowing that he could hear the conversation well and he shrugged back at me. "We're not doing anything yet. Why?" Not liking where this was going already.

"Want to go surfing at Jensen or Harbor Hills? Really nice beaches. Their harbor isn't far from where you guys are so we can just go that one. Lauren and Katie wanted to invite Jacob, but we wouldn't mind if you came along too. It'd be one of the last times we could all hang out. Come on—you guys will come, right?"

I began to shake my head as Jacob laughed at my facial expression, sounding too much like Billy.

"Is that Jacob? Put him on. Lauren wants to talk with him."

I gave over the phone, annoyed, and watched Jacob talk for a several minutes to a screeching and enthusiastic Lauren. I watched my mother in the kitchen from the corner of my eye and kicked Jacob's leg lightly trying not to show my discontentment, but not trying to allow him too much of his own thing either. It was a fine line.

"Yeah, we'll both be there. Uh-huh. Okay, bye." He handed the phone back to me and I hung up without even knowing if someone was still on the other line or not. "What?" was all he would reply when I continued to give him a nasty look.

"I don't want to surf."

He shrugged again. "I'll be there the whole time."

I was adamant. "I do not want to surf. Why are we going anyway? They only want you. Only Mike really wants me there."

"Well, I'd be okay with you there too. Like I said; don't worry. I won't let anything happen to you. Promise."

The colored bruising seemed to have spread from my neck spread upwards toward my cheeks as Jacob softly touched my skin.

On the beach, Jacob made good on his promise and he seemed just as certain of himself in the water just as much as he was on land as wolf, though no one else knew about that last bit. Lauren and Katie had wasted no time in trying to get him to help them "stay" on their beginner's foam surfing boards. He helped them without losing patience, but I was afraid that I was fighting a losing battle with Jacob and how the rest of the world saw him.

My irritation was calmed only by wanting my best friend to be happy. I had stolen his innocence as easily as I had given away mine, but I didn't feel as if it had been a waste. I felt like it was more of a step for the two of us to have shared what we did. I tried not to rub my neck too hard in case the waterproof makeup started to rub off, but tears stung my eyes worse than the brine from the sea. I fingered my green and white stripped two-piece and felt insignificantly small compared to both Lauren, Katie, and Jessica's fuller figure. I was really just readjusting the shorts I was wearing, to make sure that it covered the scratches Jacob had made on my upper, inner thighs, but my hands just as soon settled there as my thoughts continued to strain my pleasant mood. I had never been vain nor had I wished for things that did not belong to me, but I felt unable to hold on to anything at all.

A little sigh came out suddenly, and Jacob's head turned toward me as he helped Katie on to her board again. He swam effortlessly over to me. His wet hair was plastered down and his expression showed apprehension. "Bells, you okay? Need some help?"

I shook my head. Even Jacob, my sun, didn't need help to stay afloat though he had never been surfing. It was like perfection all over again. It was almost like Edward all over again. I knew that Jacob was not Edward and that he never would be. He would never fill my heart quite the same way as my beloved had, but at the same time he formed his own place deep within me. I never understood what had made me fall so unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Edward, but it hadn't mattered at the time. His very existence was so magical and so unplanned that I hadn't cared what could have happened as long as I was able to be with him.

My heart tore in two. That was the moment I had feared for my life even; the moment when I could not make a choice between living as I had lived before Jacob Black had came to me that day at the beach or to leap back from the cliff's edge. I had been stopped from jumping that morning. Laurent had spared me mere minutes before I would have been introduced to Sam's pack and reintroduce Jacob in my life, but that was no longer enough. I needed help, but would Jacob be able to accept things as they already were until I was ready?

Jacob moved toward me and touched my shoulder. I hissed back, frustrated that he had interrupted my self-revelation about how selfish I was being. "Don't, Jacob."

He looked hurt. "Bella—"

I slapped my body purposefully against the foamy board and looked away from Jacob. I didn't need to see his eyes. I didn't need to see the agony that would certainly tear into me. I didn't need to see what I was doing to him. "You don't need to be this close to me." I had to reestablish our boundaries. I had to push him back over the line.

"Bells, what's wrong? Are you upset with me? Did I do something?"

My eyes squeezed shut. I did not need to hear him. I did not need to see him. "Can you please move away from me? I really just need this time by myself."

I heard him sigh. Just go. Please, just go.

"Can I just say something?" I didn't answer him. "Bella!" Jacob exclaimed.

"Lower your voice," I murmured at him again. "And no, you may not say something."

He obeyed me by lowering his tone, but would not be swayed from talking to me. "Can you please just talk to me, Bells? Bella?"

I shook my head, not bothering to answer him.

I felt the boards move and the front of my body hit the water with force suddenly. My head submerged completely under the water as I felt the density of the air change and my lungs screamed out to feel air in them again. I sputtered and spun around to look for my former best friend whose neck I was going to throttle until his long wolf tongue hung out from his head. I was going to watch his skin turn purple as I—

Warm hands pulled me back under the water. My vision was blurry as I saw the underside of the ocean; I was amazed momentarily by how much the beautiful sunny sky looked the same underwater as it did on the surface. The cold pressed itself into my chest, taking the heat away and replacing it with the fear that I had tainted the one incorruptible thing I had left in my existence. My head stung as the weight of my thoughts, my painful memories, each represented by one strand of my hair felt like no matter how long I could keep from opening my mouth and nose to breathe in the air that did not exist underwater, I still didn't have Edward.

How could you do this to me, my love? Why would you think it was better for you to leave? Did you really want to save my soul? Take it; I don't want it without you.

I closed my eyes, feeling unworthy to even look at my golden apparition of Edward. I didn't need my sight to see Edward again; I would remember him for as long as I lived, until the moment I would descend deeper into the clear ocean. Let it be quick. Let me fall now. The temperature of the water started to become freezing, keeping my mind focused on the dwindling pain in my upper thighs as my legs continued to float almost aimlessly; dead in the water. Let me sink. Please God, let me drown. It began to feel comforting; Edward wrapped his arms around me by way of the freezing water, my faith in us being reunited returned with a burn.

A burn?

The images of Edward started to fade as I called out his name; Edward could not leave me again in this silent, watery tomb. Not now, not ever again.

"Edward, don't—" I called out before I could stop myself. What air was left tumbled out and a sharp prick burrowed into my lower body. I gasped a mouthful of water before I opened my eyes, despite the burn, and saw the outline of Jacob's body within arm's reach of me. I resumed briefly thinking about choking him under the water, but I knew that the added combination of the water and his inhuman speed would not allow my strangling to have been very accurate. Jacob looked at me apologetically, his fingers gently stroking the side of my face as he pulled me closer with his free hand. My hands raised themselves in defense from the warmth of his body, but he shook his head and pressed his lips to mine.

He gently pushed air from his mouth into me, to allow my lungs a few breaths and my legs and arms felt limp, unable to fight him anymore. I felt my nipples become aroused through my bikini top as his nose brushed back and forth across mine. He never seemed to have run out of air to give me as he spent each moment and every second continuously deepening each kiss that we shared. It was pure ecstasy and agony all over again. My mind felt a pull toward my old life, but my body was committed to staying wrapped in Jacob's arms and forever in his sweet, breathy kisses. I tried to keep my eyes open, but they started to burn furiously. Jacob rubbed his thumb over my eyelids once to close them without interrupting our kiss. He had known what I needed without me saying anything and he hadn't kept anything from me. He knew I could do this. He knew I was ready for him.

But I didn't want to be just yet.

I tore my tongue from him and managed to swallow another mouthful of water as my brown hair broke through the surface. I sputtered again, feeling my heavy eyes and Jacob used the moment to establish contact with me again, burying his face into my wet hair. I was felt so wrecked with emotional havoc that I couldn't bear the strength to push him back nor even lift my head to look at him as I should have.

"Don't shut me out, Bella. Please don't shut me out. I was so close to losing you before when that night happened—"

I started to pull back, but he fastened his grip.

"No Bella, just listen. Just listen to me; Bella Swan, I'm in lo—"

"Jacob, let me go. I can't deal with this. I won't deal with this right now." My head fell into his body. I could not look into his eyes. I could look anywhere except those eyes. The way he had looked at me when we had became good friends. The way he understood me when there was something I didn't want to discuss. The way he looked when he had me in the bed that very morning, under him, over him, with him, and because of him. It made me dread those eyes even more than realizing that Edward Cullen may no longer be the only man to make my heart go weak.

"Wait." His grip continued to press into my wrists. If I fought him, I knew he would let me go or risk breaking my wrists. I knew he would rather die than knowingly hurt me. "Bella, please just listen to me for one second—"

"WHOO! Did you see that? I stood halfway on the board all by myself! That was awesome! I will be a great surfer yet!" Mike suddenly screamed some distance away.

"Fascinating, Mike. You could be the substitute surf instructor if Jacob calls out sick," Lauren's voice called and it sounded dangerously nearby.

Katie chimed in from an even closer proximity, "Well, if Jacob is out sick from teaching class then I guess I'll just have to cut school. What's the point if you can't watch the hot teacher?"

My pulse quickened and Jacob half snorted as he dropped my wrists and placed his arms around my lower waist instead, backing me into the floating surfboards in case I slipped from his grasp. I doubted that Jacob would have allowed a second for me to possibly get away from him.

My ex classmates swam closer, flat on their stomachs with their surf foam boards.

"Aren't you two cozy?" Katie exclaimed, green with envy radiating from her dark blue eyes.

"No," I began stuttering. "I—I was just—I was just a bit cold." I kept shaking my head. "Jacob was just showing me something, I fell off the board, and was cold but now I'm warm. Right, Jacob? That's all, right?"

"Something like that." His tone was condescending. I struggled against him a little, but he kept his grip. Lauren noticed.

"Jacob, why don't you let Bella get back on her board and you can ride back in with me? There's this beach bar on the beach that I scoped out last night that we should try. You'd love it. I'll buy you your first drink—oh, wait. Do they drink on the reservation? Like fire water or something? Maybe you could show me a thing or two." Lauren laughed.

Jacob continued to stare at me, making me uncomfortable. I shifted a little in his clutch. "How about it, Bella? Want to come drink with us?" He asked me.

I shook my head. "I think I'm a little tired."

Lauren's smile widened, overjoyed. "Oh that's no problem. Jessica and Mike will walk you back and then join us later if you feel more up to it later on tonight. Then you should definitely come back out. 'Kay?"

"Bella's fine." Jacob's voice sounded snippy but he smiled. I almost thought he started to tremble for the commencement of a phase, but it was only his eyes and pitch that had given him away. This particular grin looked unnatural on him, but it was also breathtaking at the same time. Katie and Lauren's eyes widened and Mike looked concerned for my safety suddenly. Jessica didn't seem to care one way or the other.

"Bella, are you okay?" Mike reached with his hand toward me and Jacob turned slightly protective, twisting me away from him and placing me back on the board in one swift motion.

"She's already got a daddy. She doesn't like being taken care of, Mike," Jacob sneered.

Mike turned defensive. "I'm only looking out for her as a friend. That's all."

"She's already got one of those too. Why don't you keep track of what you have before you lose what you've got," Jacob challenged.

I hadn't missed the absence of a question in his tone. Now I was worried that Jacob would phase. "I'm fine, Mike," I answered while still looking at Jacob. "I guess I will have that drink with you guys." I didn't want Jacob and Mike to be together in the bar, alone. Mike could not have known what he was up against even if Jacob wasn't a teenage werewolf.

Later that night...

I watched Jacob drink another round of Hudson Bay Rum, supposedly 180 proof. He had uttered to me that because of his high metabolism as a werewolf he would not be able to get drunk. He was testing the theory, currently, on his seventh straight shot in the past hour. I had never gotten the chance to look up and see if mixing drinks would be dangerous for a normal person, but Katie and Lauren were not prepared to listen to me anyway as they desperately tried to keep up with Jacob. If Jacob had been the type, he could have easily taken advantage of the two and they would have never known the difference. Or maybe that's what they would have wanted.

Mike was looking annoyed with Jessica who was now whining about being stuck on shot #2. I was on #3 and Lauren & Katie were on #5. I had actually quit in my mind, but I was waiting a little bit before attempting to walk with Jacob back to Renee's. She only lived a few blocks away from the bar that didn't card the underage. It was extremely lucky that Renee was very understanding about the teenage/young adult frame of mind. Charlie would have had a stroke.

Jacob's eyes were red, but he looked very much in control. Even if it wasn't for his metabolic rate I didn't think that anything would've brought this kid down. His sheer size and weight alone made me fear him and he was my best friend—or former best friend, depending on how you looked at it.

Most of the late afternoon had been spent with Jacob trying to get me alone to talk about what had happened between us last night and what was happening earlier on the beach. I knew he was going against his primal instincts to carry me over his shoulder Tarzan & Jane style, demanding to know what was going on with me. Begging me to answer why I suddenly couldn't look at him, why I wouldn't allow him to touch my bare skin, or even why I wouldn't allow myself to inhale when standing right next to him. His last attempt in the shopping center by the Ice Cream Shoppe had been almost a downright plea for me to talk to him. His voice had cracked within hearing distance of Jessica, who had then strained to hear the rest of the conversation. I had hushed Jacob and given him a look; his rage had slowly been boiling at the surface since. A few tremors had made his chest shake, but nothing more. There was no other indication of him being who he truly was or what his ancestry had bestowed upon him for his tribe's protection and for his very survival.

"Jake, I think you've had enough."

"No, I haven't."

"Can you please stop?" I pleaded. "I think we should get back. I don't want Renee to worry."

"I think I can handle myself. Are you worried?"

"No." I lied and hesitantly watched his hands close around a small shot glass. I urged him further. "Jake, please?" My hand touched his arm and he flinched back. I was hurt and he looked as though I had stabbed him with just a mere look.

"I…" He looked ready to break until he swallowed and threw his head back for another shot. That was #8. "Sorry. I want to keep going."

I hit my final resort, "I really think we should talk. Let's go back and talk, okay?"

"We don't need to talk." He slid off his bar stool with ease and his fingers grasped the back of my neck. A sharp intake of breath drew into my mouth as his lips fell across my shoulder and I felt an inferno beneath my very epidermis. "Why talk, Bella, when I can do this to you? Make you feel this way?" He whispered into my hair, beginning to kiss me in between words. I couldn't smell the alcohol. I wondered if he or I were actually sane since I couldn't smell his inebriation.

"Jake, what are you doing? Don't do this—"

"Come on, Bells. Let me make you happy here. Let me help you 'talk' right now. I'll make you say everything that you need to say." His kisses began to make my head feel congested, but my chest felt voided out. This wasn't how he had felt to me the night before or even this morning. He wasn't behaving like my Jacob. I didn't know who he was anymore. This afternoon, he had become possessive and hideous. Now he was hormonal and obnoxious. I peered at our small group, but thankfully no one was paying attention to Jacob's sudden touchiness.

"Damn it, Jake—stop!" My voice half screamed and half whimpered. He was thrown off by the stress in my voice and my cursing, but he was not dissuaded by it. He chuckled lightly, thinking I hadn't meant what I said.

"Bells, it's me. It's your Jacob, remember? Bella, I can make you happy. Right now. I promise." He kissed me again in between sentences. "Don't leave. Let me make you happy. Can you do that? Just trust me." He closed his lips around mine and I felt my knees shake again.

My hands found his lower abdomen to push as hard as I dared and I bit down on the tongue that had flitted in and out of my mouth so carelessly just a few moments ago. He pulled back. I felt his skin scrape and tear, but I didn't taste any blood. Thankfully. Jacob's nostrils and temper flared in an instant.

"This is bullshit, Bella! You're such a fuckin' tease! You have one miserable, failed relationship with my enemy and you're leaving the one good thing—"

"Good thing? You're a 'good thing,' Jacob Black? You're a cocky, selfish little boy who has no idea what it takes to be able to be responsible for someone other than yourself—"

"I kiss better than a cold, callous rock," Jacob whispered angrily. "He could never do what we did last night, what we did this morning." My eyes widened and I silently tried to hush him with my mind. "What did I do to you, repeatedly?" He continued. "What did we do together? How many times did I make you come? There was no mistake what happened between us."

"Stop," I begged. "Stop it, please."

"He could have never kissed you like I kiss you. You said it yourself; you two couldn't even be intimate together. Because he would kill you—right? Well, guess what? He still killed something in you 'cause he left. He left and I'm here; he's not. Where is he? Has he even tried to call you since? Has any of that family you hold onto so desperately tried to speak with you? Where was he? Where was he when that black-haired leech was running after you in the forest? Where was he when you were alone in the woods crying for him, begging for him? Where was he when you called out to him in your dreams? The dreams that I watched you have? The dreams I comforted you during and you never even knew?"

I looked around nervously. Still no one was listening to us, but I couldn't bear to let Jacob talk anymore. I didn't want him to continue bad-mouthing Edward. Edward loved me. I knew he did. Once a long time ago, Edward loved me. I shook my head and Jacob continued, angry and shaking.

"You can't keep me quiet any longer, Bella. I've been there for you. I'm here for you now. I'm fighting for you and you don't seem to care. That leech is never coming back for you, Bells," Jacob sneered. He had lowered his voice to a barely audible whisper. His angry gaze pierced into my teary eyes. "He hurt you, Bella. How badly? I saw you that morning. I saw how broken you were, how much life you had given up on just because your bloodsucker left. You're still holding onto him like he's air when he's not your whole life anymore."

"You don't know what you're talking about. He protected me."

"I'm protecting you!" Jacob hissed softly. "Me! I'm the reason your heart still beats. I'm the reason you were able to laugh again. I'm the reason your cheeks flushed as you came on the counter, on the floor, on the bed, and on me. I did that, Bells. You want to be with me and you just can't stand the thought that I'm the better choice for you. Loving me would be too fuckin' easy for Ms. Perfect Bella Swan who needs to complicate life. Who needs to stay selfish and not give a shit what other people want—"

My cry was quiet and the sound of the slap that I gave him became the only noise that I could hear in the small bar. It was the only thing that mattered. My hand throbbed and immediately swelled, but I would not hold my hand in pain in front of him. I would keep as cool as I could even if I had been the one to actually put my hands on him first in a fit of rage. My cheeks were beyond red and I had run out of tears during his rant. His shallow breaths were deep enough to block out the vibrations of my own heart thumping against my chest and his old tear tracks did nothing but streamline his beautiful face, which I didn't care for quite as much right now.

I made a move toward the exit as Jacob made a move to touch me. I inhaled deeply and shook my head once, "Find your own way back, Jacob."

My heels took off through the door and the harsh warm wind blew against me like a sudden climate change in the desert night. I felt empty and suffocated by the hurtful things that Jacob had said, what I had allowed him to say before my body reacted with such a violent burst that it had scared me. I was lucky he hadn't changed. I was truly blessed that Jacob hadn't phased on the spot and accidentally hurt me physically as much as I had obviously mentally stifled him. Had he really said all those things? Had he really meant them? Had I been living in denial the past few months when I was with him and I believed he had truly understood all that had been going on?

I had no answers to my internal questions as I fought to keep Renee from seeing my tear-stained face without much success. She had been sitting calmly on the sofa, reading a book when I walked in, but when her eyes met mine she became alarmed. I put on the breavest front that I could as she asked the two questions I most wanted to avoid.

"Where's Jacob? You two okay?"

"We're fine. Jacob's staying out a while longer and I'm going to bed. See you in the morning." I had it rehearsed. I was becoming a better liar already. It had not been easy pretending to be alive when Edward had first left me, but I survived and I would survive this time too. It was a horrible feeling, knowing that Jacob had been the very one to help me get back my life, but I had started to wonder if I truly had needed him.

I scorned myself with a laugh. "I needed him. I need him still," I exclaimed into the nearest pillow I could bury my face into. I shook with a few loud sobs as I heard Renee walk toward her bedroom.

But I would not let him ruin me. I just wouldn't allow this hole to be torn into again. Not now. Not when I had come so far. Not when I still felt the power I had just been given back.

I opened the door to the balcony deck to my mom's guest bedroom I was staying in, locked the door, got undressed, and wrapped myself in a towel. I was fussing with my hair when a soft, but firm knock echoed from the door. "Mom, I said I was okay. Now go to bed," I called over my shoulder.

"It's me, Bella. Open the door." Jacob.

My eyes closed. He didn't sound angry and he still sounded like Jacob, but I didn't need to face him right now. I was thinking about hitting him with a curling iron. Heat on heat. I would see how resistant he was to pain. I pushed the horrible image away. That wasn't the type of person I was. "I'll talk to you in the morning. I'm really tired," I said out loud, instead.

"I'm not leaving until I talk to you, Bella."

"Go sleep in the other guest room. Or lay down in the kitchen on the floor like a good doggy," I threw in for hurt.

He didn't seem to hear it. "I will force this door open, Bella. And I'll fix it before anyone even knows. Phil's asleep and Renee is already a stage away from dreaming." Jacob added defiantly, "I will get in."

I sucked in a breath and stomped over to the door. He was quickly becoming a pain. My fingers turned harsh pink from the grip I used on the door handle and as soon as I turned it, Jacob pushed himself in, grabbed me, and forced me to face him when his back hit the bedroom wall.

"What are you—?"

His lips were on me quickly and he began to pull at the tight knot of my flimsy towel. My heartbeat and breaths accelerated, despite the gnawing anger I felt. Jacob pressed my entire body with the top of his. One hand snaked its way across my stomach as the other continued to jerk at the knot, but I knew he was playing "human" for me. He could have ripped my towel in half with just his teeth.

"Bella, I am so sorry for what I said to you. You have to forgive me," he begged.

"I don't have to do anything. Get out of my—"

Jacob's hands covered my thighs and his mouth wrapped around mine, silencing my words and my lucid thoughts. His kisses turned calm instead of hungry and desperate and my mind was suddenly clear. I knew exactly what I wanted as I felt my towel slip down to the floor. I heard the door lightly shut. His kisses began comforting my hands; my swollen fingers that I had used to hit him with earlier were numb and serene when he was through. Our positions switched as he placed my naked back against the wall toward the opened door of the balcony and I began to feel wet as I heard the faint sound of foil ripping in the distance.

He could open as many condoms as he wanted and I would have made it a personal guarantee that we would have used them all.

His hands were on my hips and he picked me up holding me in the air for a moment. "Do you forgive me, Bella?"

Tears were coming out of my eyes as I nodded.

He touched my face and kissed just under my eyes. Then he faced me, whispering, "Bella, I love you. Do you understand? I am in love with you, Bella Swan."

"Jake, I—Oh!" As his hips slipped further into mine, my head leaned, sinking into the wall and then nothing made sense anymore. Every moment that we stayed together as we scraped across every surface of the wall or every bit of the balcony floor was a moment that we were both equally thankful for. Jacob lusted for each and every powerful release that my body could give and he received them, openly and without prejudice. He was content to let me do what I wished once more and I rewarded him by calling his name in hushed screams, moans, and muffled cries. Not one cry (or orgasm) felt or sounded the same, but they all meant the world to him.

Unknown to me, he had resolved to make me forget any and every thing that had to do with my previous existence. I was to forget my life as I had known it, without the supernatural, in Phoenix with my mom and Phil. Jacob was going to excuse my time with the vampires that I had come to know and love in Forks for these next few nights of bliss with him, as many and as often as I cared to give him. I was to disregard the existence I had, period, before him. Everything became about us. Everything was a step and an approach toward what we could become, unhindered by what people would think of us. There were no barriers with us anymore. The only thing stopping us was me.

Jacob breathed his love again and again into my waiting mouth, but he never asked me that night if I felt the same. He covered every inch of my body with his hands, his breath, and his own cries as much as he could without scaring me away. He knew just what to say to me. He always knew what to say to me.

I started to hate that "enough" was not enough for me anymore when it had to do with Jacob. I felt protective of him. More than I had in the past. I couldn't stand for another girl to get their hands on him anymore than he could stand if Mike would ever make good on his resolution to be with me. I suddenly didn't want him to give up trying for me, fighting for me, or loving me. I loved that Jacob Black was in love with me. As egotistical as it sounded, I wanted him to stay around for me. I needed him around me. I wanted to be as gluttonous and ungiving as he could stand for me to be, and in return, I would let him be with me. I would allow him to be around me, inside of me. Anything we needed each other to be, then that was what we would be for each other.

I felt him twitch as another orgasm released itself into the condom and remnants of the shock were absorbed into me as I closed my eyes with a tight smile. His tongue swept the very base of my neck and his thrusts hurt considerably less than our previous night. He was learning to control himself better. He was learning to read exactly what I wanted and exactly what I needed from him in this relationship. My eyes quickly viewed a few cracks along the floor, by the baseboard, but Jacob could fix anything. He had already proven it. He had fixed my truck. He had fixed me. I loved that he was exactly what I needed. He was exactly for me and no one else. I loved that he was still willing to be my Jacob.

And I then realized I had fallen in love with my Jacob.